* Posts by J. R. Hartley

595 posts • joined 23 Jan 2011

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Manchester plod still running 1,500 Windows XP machines

J. R. Hartley
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Re: I still have two XP instances

As long as you keep them offline, nothing.

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Uber Cali goes ballistic, calls online ads bogus: These million-dollar banners are something quite atrocious

J. R. Hartley
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It never gets old. Even after all these years.

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Oracle softly increments SPARC M7 to M8, then whispers: We'll still love you, Solaris, to 2034

J. R. Hartley
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Nice and expensive, yet a dead end.

Perfect for running AmigaOS 4

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Why the Apple Watch with LTE means a very Apple-y sort of freedom

J. R. Hartley
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Typical Apple bullshit

If any other company released a steaming pile of dung such as this, they would be finished.

Fortunately, the Apple Reality Distortion Field is stronger than ever.

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How to stop Facebook and Apple taking over the mobile phone industry

J. R. Hartley
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I can't lie to you about your chances but...

You have my sympathies.

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Apple's 'shoddy' Beats headphones get slammed in lawsuit

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Nothing new here

Complete and utter failure to chooch. Typical Apple.

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Speaking in Tech: Dell and EMC – one year after they shacked up....

J. R. Hartley
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Excellent

Bout time The Reg got rid of this shite. Jumped the shark a few years ago now.

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Apple: Our stores are your 'town square' and a $1,000 iPhone is your 'future'

J. R. Hartley
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Gentlemen.

She doesn't chooch, and definitely isn't skookum.

Son of a diddly.

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Oracle to shutter most Euro hardware support teams

J. R. Hartley
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Sparc

We hardly knew ye :'(

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Five ways Apple can fix the iPhone, but won't

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Bollocks.

Yeah. That's why I drive a Galaxy S8 and my phone is a Volvo 850R.

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: Groups and Rooms

Well I, for one, am now triggered.

Microsoft have killed off ('depricated') all the best bits aboit Windows Phone. Just bought a brand new Nokia Lumia 930, and while going through the obligitory hours of OS upgrades I noticed key features and apps were disappearing. Lumia Beamer - gone. YouTube app - gone.

It's almost as if Microsoft don't want your custom.

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J. R. Hartley
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Bollocks.

iPhones have always been a bit of a joke. People buy them because other people buy them. It's the same type of generic human that buy BMWs but can't tell you why.

It's time to Think Different™

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Massive iPhone X leak trashes Apple's 10th anniversary circus

J. R. Hartley
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Meh

iPhones have been a legacy product for many years.

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Red panic: Best Buy yanks Kaspersky antivirus from shelves

J. R. Hartley
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That's the spirit!

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: @Amos1

Bollocks.

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Microsoft says it won't fix kernel flaw: It's not a security issue. Suuuure

J. R. Hartley
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That's the spirit!

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Microsoft won't patch Edge browser content security bypass

J. R. Hartley
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That's the spirit!

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TalkTalk plans to bail on mobile in major shake-up for beleaguered biz

J. R. Hartley
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I miss ntl:

We were the future once :'(

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J. R. Hartley
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Bollocks

TalkTalk is naff in every way imaginable. Pull it.

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Twitter is just randomly deleting people's lists – and no one knows why

J. R. Hartley
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A decade of work stored on Twitter?

What a fucking idiot.

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Thousands of hornets swarm over innocent fire service drone

J. R. Hartley
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You can't make that type of decision, you're just a grunt!

No offence.

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J. R. Hartley
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Always said that hornets are scumbags.

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Crushed Juicero now officially a fruitless endeavor

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Shame

Son of a diddly

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J. R. Hartley
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Shame

She was a real skookum choocher.

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Yahoo! must! face! the! music! over! data! breaches! judge! rules!

J. R. Hartley
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Ya! Who?

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Asterisk RTP bug worse than first thought: Think intercepted streams

J. R. Hartley
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Oh dear

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15 'could it be aliens?' fast radio bursts observed in one night

J. R. Hartley
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It's not a distress call, it's a warning.

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Sony remembers it once made a great little phone

J. R. Hartley
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Somebody's triggered da 900 cru

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Oracle finally decides to stop prolonging the inevitable, begins hardware layoffs

J. R. Hartley
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A sad end

Sun, we hardly knew ye.

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Speaking in Tech: Comin' attcha live, raw and uncut from VMworld

J. R. Hartley
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Just give it up

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How the CIA, Comcast can snoop on your sleep patterns, sex toy usage

J. R. Hartley
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There is a direct correlation with dildo usage and noise.

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Australians still buy 100,000 feature phones a quarter

J. R. Hartley
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They can afford it. Drugs cost a fucking fortune over there. It's an utter disgrace, I'm in the wrong business.

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China to identify commentards with real‑name policy

J. R. Hartley
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Shit

I'll have to change my name.

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PC sales to fall and fall and fall and fall and fall for the next five years

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Useless

A power bottom

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: Useless

I can assure you there's no problem in that particular department. I'm a big hit on Grindr.

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: Useless

What?

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: Useless

That fucking book. I typed that on a Commodore PET that I stroked from one of my old fishing buddies. That's how I made my foray into bespoke enterprise IT solutions. I never liked flyfishing anyway.

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J. R. Hartley
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Useless

What is the point of PCs these days? I built an absolute top of the range beast 3 years ago. Triple monitors, the lot. I use it maybe once a month to fill out my overtime sheet in Word.

Looks good though.

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Nasty firmware update butchers Samsung smart TVs so bad, they have to be repaired

J. R. Hartley
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Bricked TVs

What a time to be alive.

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Oldest flying 747 finally grounded, 47 years after first flight

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Rock Lobster

The A500 only flew at 7MHz.

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J. R. Hartley
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Re: Poor Design

Can you imagine if Apple made a plane? Fuck me.

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Headless body found near topless beach: Missing private sub journalist identified

J. R. Hartley
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It's one for Wallander

Pass me the blower.

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AccuWeather: Our app slurped your phone's location via Wi-Fi but we like totally didn't use it

J. R. Hartley
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Bollocks

The only way these companies will learn is if they get fined a large percentage of their turnover. If they go bust then that's just tough shit. That'll tighten them.

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Fujitsu looking to flog its smartphones biz – report

J. R. Hartley
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Tara ya shitter.

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UK.gov is hiring IT bods with skills in ... Windows Vista?!

J. R. Hartley
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Re: 2003?!

When I seize power, the first people against the wall will be 'recruitment consultants'.

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10 minutes of silence storms iTunes charts thanks to awful Apple UI

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Autoplay and Rule 34

The struggle is real.

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Nokia's comeback is on: The flagship 8 emerges

J. R. Hartley
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Re: Same old, same old

Yep. Nokia really screwed the pooch.

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Guess who's hiking their prices again? Come on, it's as easy as 123 Reg

J. R. Hartley
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'Comedy'

Lol. I fucking love The Reg.

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Alien 'lava lamp' with dying magnetic field orbited Earth a billion years ago – science

J. R. Hartley
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Black goo

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New Amiga to go on sale in late 2017

J. R. Hartley
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Glad this is getting mainstream attention. Even Trevor Dickinson's machines never really get much coverage. Still love the Amiga. Just give me a decent browser and LibreOffice and I'll get a Vampire for my A3000 when they are released.

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