* Posts by Captain Scarlet

1746 posts • joined 30 Dec 2010

BOFH: Turn your server rack hotspot to a server rack notspot

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Stair Oil

From experience just use a carpet cleaner will make carpets wet for about a day (Absolute Chaos at this office when the carpets were cleaned Monday morning), so its not that.

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Mars is red, Earth is blue. Here's a space laser story for you

Captain Scarlet
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Big Brother

Of course, puppets are better than CGI and don't shoot lasers at things at Mysteron homes.

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Roses are red, Windows error screens are blue. It's 2018, and an email can still pwn you

Captain Scarlet
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Terminator

Re: Preview pane?

I am lazy, anything obviously spam is deleted (StrongBadEmail style, except without the Lappie 486), anything with something work related look in the preview, hit the archive button to make it disappear into a random folder.

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From tomorrow, Google Chrome will block crud ads. Here's how it'll work

Captain Scarlet
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Stop

Re: Well behaved ads on the Reg

To many times I have opened all the storeis I want for Firefox or IE (Corporate machine I have no say in web browser preference before you whine use Chrome or Edge) to go into meltdown using up all the CPU. Hasn't been a while but Reg I hate your fill all whitespace adverts which don't work well when I open 20 tabs

Edit: Time to dig out the 15 inch 4:3 TFT

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NASA's zombie IMAGE satellite is powered up and working quite nicely

Captain Scarlet
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Mushroom

Re: Ooooops, sorry!

Its a Mysteron Satelitte, they like to blow things up and recreate them.

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You're the IT worker in charge of securing the cloud for your company. Welcome to Hell

Captain Scarlet
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: ..Osborne, you were spoilt!

Primitive as they were you could focus on one thing and do it well.

Green Screen operators could touch type with 99% accuracy, the amount of error checking for data input that is now required is just insane.

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Captain Scarlet
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Flame

While we like to think it natural for people to take care of a mobile phone

I expect users to spill tea, get gravy on the screen and run over the company supplied mobile phone before they take the plastic off the front of the screen

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A tiny Ohio village turned itself into a $3m speed-cam trap. Now it has to pay back the fines

Captain Scarlet
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Murder She Wrote

This to me sounds like it could be made into an episode of Murder She Wrote

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UK data watchdog whacks £300k fine on biz that made 9 million nuisance calls

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Public Records

I stand corrected, I do believe the Unix command pre-dates any EULA by ICANN.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Public Records

Its a shame you had to breach whois EULA for that though, although I admit I am now very tempted to do the same.

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Shopper f-bombed PC shop staff, so they mocked her with too-polite tech tutorial

Captain Scarlet
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Re: PC world

@Antron Argaiv

Yeah there was, was used on our school's RM computers for Encarta 95 and other such software.

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When you play this song backwards, you can hear Satan. Play it forwards, and it hijacks Siri, Alexa

Captain Scarlet
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Paris Hilton

Echo, open the front door.

What people install "smart" locks now as well, I assume all you need to do is yell loud enough so said device can hear?

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You had one job, Outlook! Security bug fix stops mail app from forwarding attachments

Captain Scarlet
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Re: "file attachments were getting cut out of messages when forwarded to others"

Not sure where list came from in my response (I meant send to contacts as a blind carbon copy), but as far as I am aware Bcc is an acronym in Lotus Notes and Outlook for blind carbon copy (MS Help certainly states this for Outlook).

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: "file attachments were getting cut out of messages when forwarded to others"

Just send to a blind carbon copy list, the reply all function is rendered useless then.

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Have three WINEs this weekend, because WINE 3.0 has landed

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Office 2016?

Why would you need Office 2016 on Linux, is it for some Accountants Hellsheet?

Removed as was unaware of "Crossover" and therefore my comment is invalid

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Hospital injects $60,000 into crims' coffers to cure malware infection

Captain Scarlet
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Or they had tested their backups and like many companies are finding realised it could takes weeks to restore essential services

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Lenovo inherited a switch authentication bypass – from Nortel

Captain Scarlet
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Re: "readers with long memories..recall that HP was a reseller of the switches, back in the day"

We have a decommissioned IBM Blade Centre with Nortel Switch modules slapped in the back (To make it look like the comms room is more populated than it is so we can't be forced to move to a smaller room again).

It doesnt count as it hasn't been powered on in years.

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BOFH: Buttock And Departmental Defence ... As A Service

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

Re: Well the smoking gang...

Ok so smoking under an umbrella is illegal as well?

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Wait! Before you fire up that HP lappy, check the battery

Captain Scarlet
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Unhappy

Re: Another quality delivery from HP!

We have to buy what we are told, recent HP models which had replacable batteries held by a plastic clip are now under a cover which have crappy screws compared to spring loaded type screws (Turns a 10 second job into a ARGH WHERE HAS THE BLEEDING SCREWS GONE WHY WHY WHY!).

Having the lovely job of going through now to find I have a 650 G2 thankfully not with one of the batteries. Oh well the PFY can take over this from Monday.

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Cisco to release patches for Meltdown, Spectre CPU vulns, just in case

Captain Scarlet
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Re: LInk?

"Cisco was also in the virtualization game"

Yeah, items such as Cisco Unity Communications are virtual these days, I assume so is the rest of Cisco appliances they used to sell many years ago.

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If you won't use your brain our machine will use it for you, Nissan tells drivers

Captain Scarlet
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Mushroom

Being stuck in traffic and trying not to have the thought of trying to ram everyone out of the way.

I think I would prefer not to have my brainwaves read, it'll end in more road rage incidents.

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And we return to Munich's migration back to Windows - it's going to cost what now?! €100m!

Captain Scarlet
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@AC Why not blow the whistle and give you evidence over to them?

"I have seen Microsoft "persuasion" in real-life in a Munich (non government) office, and it's sickening how Microsoft money can make anything happen...."

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'Please store the internet on this floppy disk'

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Brings back bad memories

Could be worse, some users actually decide its a good idea to setup mail rules to be deleted from internal addresses.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Brings back bad memories

"idiot proof instructions"

How do you make your instructions idiot proof, I've resorted to videos showing exactly how something can be done and still users look in a daze and simply respond its not working. Best method is printed colour documents with lots of screenshots arrows and bullet points.

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Windows Store nixed Google Chrome 'app' hours after it went live

Captain Scarlet
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snub the platform by withholding big-name apps like YouTube and Google Maps

Whats wrong with using favourites in youir browser of choice?

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Google asks browser rival Vivaldi to post uninstall instructions

Captain Scarlet
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Re: another 'Google is Evil' example

hmm I completly forgot they made everything able to recognise search queries in their form for the various IOT home devices, I'll have to give it another go.

Ask Jeeves for me used to be brilliant, however this was about 14 years ago when Lycos was my second go to search engine.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: another 'Google is Evil' example

To be honest I am lazy and I can't find anything like Ask Jeeves anymore (I used to like that way of searching where you search by asking a question).

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Container-flinger pushes Win 10 transformer for legacy apps

Captain Scarlet
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Re: It would have been nice...

"Windows 10 could run Windows 7 applications natively"

There have been very few program I havent been able to get to run on Windows 7/10, mainly programs which relied on something 16 bit related or had a 16 bit installer. Programs relying on VB6 runtime still worked the last time I checked on 7 however I do admit havent tried them on 10.

These programs were designed for Windows 9x, sorry but I still rate backwards compatibility of Windows NT and Linux based OS's such as CentOS (Dependencies can be sorted easily) as workable.

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BlackBerry won't kill BB10 until 2020, pulls regular Priv updates

Captain Scarlet
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Coat

"BB10 app store will continue to remain open for another two years"

I'm surprised any BB10 users would use it considering there was literally nothing on there (2 years ago before I jumped ship).

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Someone tell Thorpe Lane in Suffolk their internet sucks – they're still loading the page

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Re:slow Talk Talk

Hmm that should be able to have an i-plate fitted.

If the lower bit comes off revealing a phone socket it should be compatible, these are supposed to reduce interference which lower the speed (Our line at home went from 2mb to 2.5mb on adsl2). Obviously be aware for anyone saying it made their connection 10x faster, because its only going to help a bit.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Re:slow Talk Talk

Thats not right, if its using BT's copper to the cabinet it should have a BT logo of some sort http://www.zawtowers.org.uk/Reviews/bt_master_socket.jpg

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Disk drive fired 'Frisbees of death' across data centre after storage admin crossed his wires

Captain Scarlet
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Unhappy

Re: Somehow most of us kept our fingers

"But your name suggests there was blood all over the place..."

hmm I do keep cutting my fingers on cardboard (My god the paperwork and the moans of thats a first aid injury from the H&S checkbox committee) so i suppose its true

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Captain Scarlet
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Coat

Somehow most of us kept our fingers

Blasted dot matrix printed tried to take my hand off.

Got a new dot matrix printer machine in (6 years ago), went to press the Online button and the panel fell in much to my surprise (This Lexmark machine is certainly not made to the same standard of their dot matrix printers from years earlier, with the previous one only being replaced because no official printer driver for it came with Windows 7/Server 2012). I put my hand in to push the button panel back and of course I hit the Online button.

The printer did as instructed and I got away with some cuts and bruises (And a reminder to turn off any machine being worked on if you put your hand inside it).

P.S sorry but thankfully I am not called Stumpy.

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Japanese quadcopter makes overworked employees clock out

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

Re: Rush

Wouldn't waving an open beer make it go everywhere, El Reg for the love of god point to the tinnie instead of splashing it everywhere!

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IT buyer? Had enough of pesky resellers cold calling? You aren't alone

Captain Scarlet
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Stop

Re: I have a policy

You are still allowed random gifts, anti bribery and corruption laws in the UK have put an end to that (Even have to record if we receive free box's of biscuits with supplier orders ffs).

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Spy-on-your-home Y-Cam cameras removes free cloud storage bit

Captain Scarlet
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Holmes

"when your Windows 10 subscription kicks in"

I will just revert all machines back to Windows 7 as I no longer have to fear of stealth upgrade tactics and Solitaire will no longer require an internet connection to actually work.

None of the machines I have built use MS accounts and they are annoying me when I see the "MEH SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THE ACCOUNT" when actually its exactly the way I want them setup.

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No, BMW, petrol-engined cars don't 'give back to the environment'

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Nice to see some backbone here

"LEVC is electric with a "generator" acting as a "range extender""

I didn't know that from the BBC news piece about it, I was wondering how they would get their 600 mile claimed range between charges, why not just be honest and call it a hybrid?

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From the graaaaaave! WileyFox's Windows 10 phone delayed again

Captain Scarlet
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Devil

Re: Just why ......

@Edwin The people are even downvoting and not responding why (I bet its someone who didn't like my stance of "Why are we going to pay £400 for an iphone when we can get a decent Windows phone for £100" a few years ago.)

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Just why ......

@Edwin The people have chosen, I don't agree with them as BB10 was brilliant as far as I was concerned, for work yes Windows Phone did the job.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Just why ......

They are betting there are enough companies still wanting them (We had them. not burned to much as they were still cheaper than the android and idevice handsets we now have to purchase).

I can't see them making a profit which is probably why they are delaying it more and more.

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Denied: Uber's request to skip to UK Supreme Court to appeal workers' rights

Captain Scarlet
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Eh Uber has made money, every article I have read so far states they are losing money on every journey?

Please correct me if I am incorrect.

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Pro tip: You can log into macOS High Sierra as root with no password

Captain Scarlet
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Paris Hilton

Re: They are busy setting Root passwords...

"Oh fcuk...Apple is going to crapster. First the scam with faulty MBP, then getting rid of the earphone jack. This is the final step to bankrupcy."

I assume this is missing a troll icon?

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Surprise: Android apps are riddled with trackers

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

Re: How is LinkedIn not there?

They have probably copied and pasted code that they arent checking for.

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Captain Scarlet
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Re: Drug dealers

We gave up Snake for Smart Phones so I assume we will also give up smart phones for the next biggest craze

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Tesla reveals a less-long-legged truck, but a bigger reservation price

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

"Just what you get for the extra $20,000, other than being one of the first 1,000 to get behind the wheel, has not been revealed"

You get software/hardware Bugs

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Samba needs two patches, unless you're happy for SMB servers to dance for evildoers

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

Thats weird, I have never heard of "Linux Code" before. I assumed they would have used C++, C or any other number of coding languages.

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BOFH: But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?

Captain Scarlet
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Re: Draw full of random keys

"but woodworking books from pre WWII generally call them desk draws or a chest of draws, etc.."

Ah no wonder I made the error, my school was very hard up for anything (Should see the nice shiney place now)

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Captain Scarlet
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Facepalm

Re: Draw full of random keys

Blast, that was very poor of me, however it makes a change from randomly offending people.

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Patch on way 'this week' for HP printer vulns

Captain Scarlet
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Trollface

The floppotron says different

Also the last time I went near our dot matrix it tried to eat my hand

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Automatic for the people: Telcos forced to pay for giving you crap services

Captain Scarlet
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"an engineer does not turn up for a scheduled appointment"

What happens if you are waiting for an engineer who has fixed it without access to the premises, i.e the local Exchange. Its happened to me before, I was still expecting the engineer on site to investigate a fault only to find out later the issue was already resolved (The router just needed an initial power load to get it back working).

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