* Posts by lesession

94 posts • joined 21 Dec 2010


Are you a Windows 1 in 10 (1809)? Or a mighty 80 percenter (1803)?


Re: 1803

Ah, more FUD. I'm guessing you've never seen a W10 box in your life.

Surface: Tested to withstand the NFL. Microsoft firmware updates? Not so much


Re: It's a bit like rugby?

I'm a huge NFL fan and have been known to describe it as a combination of all-in wrestling and chess.

Show me a better spectacle in the world of sport than Montana to Rice, or Mahomes to Hill, and then maybe let's have a conversation about whether the time the ball spends moving is the key indicator; I've seen lots of (Association) football where the ball was in constant motion and there was precisely zero excitement on offer.

Windows 10 Insiders sent on quest deep into Registry to fetch goblet of Reserved Storage


Re: Kill Windows 10 version of Start Menu

Blimey is ClassicShell still around? The market for that hacky POS disappeared the moment W10 appeared and fixed the nastiness of W8.

Presumably you're also still using a 14 inch CRT television, your telephone has a rotary dialler on it and a wire attaching it to the house, and your car has none of those new-fangled parking sensors and seatbelts and airbags ...

Pork pulled: Plug jerked out of beacon of bacon delight


Re: Mixed feelings

> [TAB] has been the [next field] key for the -also many- decades of HTML existence,

> it's strange that you would only notice it now.

It's Eternal September ...

Time for a cracker joke: What's got one ball and buttons in the wrong place?


Millennium Bug

I got a new job and my start date ended up being Tuesday 4th January 2000.

So I spent the last few months of my old job coordinating getting the Novell Netware upgraded to a Y2K compliant version and all the other hardware & systems patched and upgraded.

It being a local Council office the place was shut to the public on Monday 03/01, so my manager and I went in early on the Monday, ran through our checklist and testing to ensure everything was OK, and were in the pub by 12 noon for a final Millennium Bug project sign-off and a farewell drink or several.

Tuesday 04/01, I turn up to my new job at another council ... and the email system wasn't up for nearly a fortnight because of a Y2K issue.

I should have known then; the place never did improve technologically and I moved on as soon as was decent ...

Careful with this latest Microsoft release – tug too hard on the threads and it tends to unravel


The Wikipedia jumper

Spends every December hassling you for payment, and gives the money to the website 'Foundation' rather than the people who actually raised and sheared the sheep, made the wool, or knitted the jumper

Ooo shiny! First Visual Studio 2019 sneak peek here in time for Chrimbo


Re: It always makes me smile...

> "The VS IDE isn't perfect, but for software requiring a visual interface"

> Which is a minority of software development in business enviroments.

Maybe in a business environment where every end user is comfortable setting parameters via the command line, or alternatively is engaged in such a menial process that the software does it all for them and they're just turning the handle.

Everyone else, including the healthcare staff I write software for, much prefers a UI thanks.

Behold, the world's most popular programming language – and it is...wait, er, YAML?!?


Re: "Popular" as in...?

Nah, popular as in 'Datree.io make the most money from getting management eejits to blow their budgets on consultancy about it'.

If you've got some budget left I've got this London Bridge I could sell you ...


Rule One of DevOps

Here's the only markup masquerading as a programming language you ever need in these circumstances:

(Reg.article.title).contains 'Devops'

{It's Marketing Hype regurgitated as 'News'} >> ignore


{Might be worth reading}

Macs to Linux fans: Stop right there, Penguinista scum, that's not macOS. Go on, git outta here


Ah diddums

Let me find my very smallest violin and play a sad sympathetic dirge.

Any idiot who spends Apple prices to run a linux box needs all their computing devices removing immediately for their own and the greater society's safety.

Worrying Windows 10 wrecking-ball weapon weirdly wanders wildly on worldwide web


Re: Sorry, but ...

Already do, just couldn't remember the canonical phrasing (and couldn't be bothered to look it up) at the time of posting :)


Sorry, but ...

New zero day flaw: 'It can be exploited by a malicious logged-in user or malware on an already infected computer' ...

Last December's RID hijacking: 'The technique requires a hacker to obtain administrative rights on a box, and can be used to assign admin rights to other users and guests.'

So to summarise both of these techniques rely on the attacker *already being an admin on the machine.* So the game is already up, the Visigoths are already inside the gates, and the attacker could install what they like and wreak all sorts of havoc without going to the trouble of mucking about with reg keys etc.

The 1809 update; that's a monumental cockup and MS deserve all the heat they're getting for that. This, not so much.

30-up: You know what? Those really weren't the days


Re: "you were seriously stuck up a gum tree"

Have an upvote just for the use of 'Eternal September' which is a phrase I've not heard in many a year. The whole fricking world apart from you & me is now in Eternal September,and quite frankly I'm not so sure about me ...

Devon County Council techies: WE KNOW IT WASN'T YOU!


Dawn Stubble's support tickets on the Devon County Council helpdesk are going to be permanently set to lowest priority for a good while ...

Reckon you deserve a Wikipedia entry? Try getting this bot's notice


Budge up on that island; I'll bring my flutes & concertina and we can play tunes as the rest of the world disappears up Jimmy Wales's backside

A fine vintage: Wine has run Microsoft Solitaire on Linux for 25 years


Re: !Linux can and does offer applications to perform the same task"

God I wish I could upvote that more than once. The only people who think that the simulacra are as good as the originals are people who don't actua;l;y have to do any meaningful work on the applications.

Just remind me about the latest OS market share scores again?

MSDN unleashes a fresh round of unintentional innuendo bingo


And of course ...

And of course don't forget the precursor to Stack Overflow, Expert Sexchange ...

Software development slow because 'Most of our ideas suck'


More utter bullsh ... snake oil

Good luck trying 'continuous experimentation' in software that actually *matters* like healthcare.

"That update you put out last week has directly contributed to three patients being mis-diagnosed, and one of them has died as a result!"

"Ah well, chill, man, we were just experimenting, I'll bang out another release with a fix in it later today."

Can I be a speaker at next year's event? I've got a scheme to remove the G from gullible and I need £200 mill in venture capital to get started; I should raise that from that shower in about 10 minutes, and sell them three London Bridges while I'm at it ...

Can't view memes on London-Southampton train? It's the worst line for mobile coverage


London-centric as ever

Try any of that Internet browsing nonsense on the Buxton-Manchester line!

Mind you we're lucky on BUX-MAN if the train that turns up has got all its wheels on; at least some of the rolling stock give you free showers in some seats when its raining.

But on the bright side, we're looking out the window at the Peak District, not London ...

DXC Tech CEO continues to wash away HPE old guard


DXC is in an utter tailspin

It must be hard work rearranging those deckchairs, seeing as how most of them are already under water ...

Software gremlin robs Formula 1 world champ of season's first win


Everything that is wrong with Formula 1 right there

What kind of 'sport' determines its winners and losers according to algorithmic calculations about how long it takes to get to the garage and back?

Calling F1 a 'sport' and the individual episode a 'race' should be done by the Trades Description Act.

Make the tracks wider so that the drivers can actually overtake, reduce all the in-race telemetry to the absolute minimum required for driver & crowd safety (by all means analyse the heck out of the gathered data afterwards), and cut the rule book down by 700 pages throwing out all the nonsense that means the start order is rarely actually determined by the qualifying laps, and then maybe you'd have something that was actually getting somewhere within a chance of being called a *sport*.

YouTube plan to use Wikipedia against crackpots hits snag


Oh the ironies

"It's not polite to treat Wikipedia like an endlessly renewable resource with infinite free labor."

Says a spokesdroid for the organisation that is built on people giving their expertise/fanaticism for free then regularly asks for money to support the 'Foundation'.

I'd put my response but that also wouldn't be polite.

Great, we're going to get DevOps-ed. So, 15 years of planning processes – for the bin?


Re: I'm not a developer but this is a genuine question...

You're missing the point. The whole point of DevOps is to shift blame and workload entirely onto the developers.

No specification? Tough, just keep guessing and shoving out updates until your guess equates to the requirement.

No oversight? Well that's your fault, that suddenly was the developers' baby as well.

Blame? Oh that goes squarely into the developers' lap, because if the solids hit the ventilation, management didn't know what the naughty developers were up to.

DevOps is an utter abrogation of management responsibility, and is deliberately engineered so that the developer gets the blame if it goes wrong whilst the management gets the credit if it goes right.

It is a fraud built on a Ponzi scheme anchored in a software South Sea Bubble.

Fender's 'smart' guitar amp has no Bluetooth pairing controls


Re: I will not hear a word said against Fender

Bah, modern rubbish. Gut strings and friction tensioners for the win!


Re: my neighbours take over our LG soundbar with their Bulgarian music

This must be the first Andy Irvine / Planxty ref on El Reg.

Mine's the one with the Well Below The Valley in the pocket ...

EU aviation agency publishes new drone framework. Hobbyists won't like it


Ban the lot of them

In what kind of parallel universe is it *sensible* for the average person to fly these things out of line of sight?

What kind of dunderheaded mouth-breathing cretin *cannot* see the potential dangers presented by them being in charge of, but not able to see, a flying object with the impact equivalent of several house bricks?

This is not an assault on people's liberties. This is society attempting to protect the majority against the actions of the brainless.

A dog DNA database? You must be barking


Anti-pun police

Are all the 1 downvotes for the various puns all from the same person?

A print button? Mmkay. Let's explore WHY you need me to add that



Could we have this article again, only this time written in English?

Still not on Windows 10? Fine, sighs Microsoft, here are its antivirus tools for Windows 7, 8.1


Re: Fuck off Microsoft...

Well I'd never really seen the point of FOSS before, but such an erudite and well-reasoned analysis as that has really made me begin to question my assumptions ...

Serverless: Should we be scared? Maybe. Is it a silly name? Possibly


I wholeheartedly support the move to serverless

The well paid consultancy jobs generated by this move, going in to sort out the utter mess businesses will get into through letting the local sixth-former write the enterprise software, should see me through to a comfortable retirement!

'The capacitors exploded, showering the lab in flaming confetti'


Re: "Who Me?" should be the RSS feed title as well.

And whilst you're at it ...

Those of us who get the daily email digest (well, me, anyway) would greatly appreciate it if 'On Call' and 'Who, Me?' could be included in the digest articles titles, for much the same reasons as @Shadow Systems highlights ...

User had no webcam or mic, complained vid conference didn’t work


Re: This one, every time

Got one of them ten minutes ago!

NHS: Thanks for the free work, Linux nerds, now face our trademark cops


Good riddance

Well if the sloppy phrasing and occasional homophone in their press release is any indication of the quality of their work, good luck to them.

This is healthcare you're mucking about with, people's lives depend on this stuff.Going in with the typical FOSSflake 'M$' attitude, failing to recognise the difference between 'addition' and 'addiction', and using professional language like 'bullshit' all point to the mindset of this operation, and it's one I wouldn't want within a million miles of any computer running any bit of software in any hospital I was connected with.

Good riddance, go back to arguing about which distro has the best splash screen.

2017 – the year of containers! It wasn't? Oops. Maybe next year



Is '20xx will be the Year Of Containers' the new '200x will be the year of desktop linux'?

Well actually probably no; because the Year of desktop linux was aimed at an ecosystem shift, whereas the 'Year Of Containers' is just a buzzword-fest aimed at selling no-nothing senior management types some very expensive conference tickets ...

Help desk declared code PEBCAK and therefore refused to help!


Re: daily i wish

"I can see your remote connection request, do I click allow or deny?"

I get asked this every single time when using Quick Assist to help my mother.





Don't fear the reap... er, automation: Puppet hopes to make IT boring, says that's a good thing


How The Register works

Press release arrives from Puppet

Press release is roughly hashed into an 'article' about how wonderful DevOps is


Got a software development and deployment story?


A 'Continuous Lifecycle' of vacuous talking shops with zero relevance to the real world.

Still if all the buzzword bingo wallahs are herded into a conference hall for a few days to compare the size of each other's containers, it gives the rest of us some time to get some actual development and deployment done without them getting in the way.


Re: Real world experience

I would upvote that comment multiple times if I could.

MH370 final report: Aussies still don’t know where it crashed or why


The X Files came up as an answer on Pointless last night. Co-incidence? I don't think so ...

Behold iOS 11, an entirely new computer platform from Apple


Wow, lots of the downvotes from the fanbois.

The iPad is still what it has always been, a limited functionality device perfect for sofa-surfing and web-browsing, not worth considering for anything serious.

The latest upgrade further attempts to blur the distinction between the iPad and a proper computer for actually doing work on, and as usual with Apple makes a complete between-two-stools dogs dinner of it.

For God's sake Apple leave the iPad alone. SInce well before Jobs died, Apple have been focused on being a social status signifier and a leisure computing brand.

If sections of the organisation really still want to pretend they're touting a serious OS for doing actual productive work on, Apple should concentrate on forcing people to spend well over the odds for the MacBook UltraThin SuperShiny (or whatever the laptops are called these days) rather than trying to make the iPad an all-singing all-dancing device.

User worked with wrong app for two weeks, then complained to IT that data had gone missing



In murder mystery stories maybe (IIRC one of James Runcie's Sidney Chambers Grantchester stories revolves around that scenario), but [citation needed] for that happening in real life.

And can I be the 94th person to point out that the original sentence suggests that the injury was caused by a rubber knife, which had been switched into the place of what was expected to be a real one?

Continuous integration platforms are broken – here's what needs fixing


Yet another Puppet press release

Typed up as 'news'.

Is there some constitutional imperative that every time Puppet put out some guff about DevOps, someone from the Reg has to write it up as if it was news?

10 minutes of silence storms iTunes charts thanks to awful Apple UI


Re: Simple tech is good

Yeah I've recently started doing that too.

Doesn't take as long to sync, way less battery drain on the phone, and gives me back control over what gets played, rather than some semi-ransom decision Android makes on the basis of what I finished listening to five journeys ago ...

The future of Python: Concurrency devoured, Node.js next on menu


Re: Switch Case

I love the way the if .. else suggestion gets 167 upvotes.

167 people who have no idea that the difference is and what the switch case is for ...

Er, Ofcom, please tell us more about Murdoch's £11.7bn Sky bid


Re: Fit and Proper

Don't forget all the appalling stories coming out about the hounding of families from Grenfell Tower and the Manchester Arena bombing, and the fact that the only reason it was the Daily Mail leading the assault on GOSH in the Charlie Gard case was because the Mail bid more money.

Murdoch's 'journalists' methods in 2017 are every bit as disgusting as they have been for decades, they (and their cronies and employees in Westminster) just pretend that as they are supposedly no longer hacking people's phone messages, everything else is above board.

Murdoch shouldn't be allowed to run his own mobility scooter, let along vast chunks of the UK media.

How can you kill that which will not die? Windows XP is back (sorta... OK, not really)


Re: Linux 1.79 per cent (was 1.55 in Jan)

And there is the problem with the linux community in a nutshell.

A linux variant that's actually used outside the geekspace? Disown it immediately, cast it out into darkness!

State of DevOps: Everyone's slinging code out faster


For Goodness' sake

Does El Reg have to regurgitate every puff piece from Puppet as if it were gospel?

Is there no fact checking, independent scrutiny, or investigative thought being put into the process that takes these DevOps advertorials from inbox to website?

The Reg is usually the site we can rely on to call out ridiculous fawning over a bunch of chancers who have managed to stick a snappy label on a bit of repackaged half-baked synergistic blue-sky thinking technowaffle, not the site that's shovelling it out as fast as it comes in.

Come on Vulture Central, you are so much better than this.

How do you do, fellow kids? Grandpa Puppet gets down with Docker


'Used' as in 'evaluated for ten minutes, binned as laughable, and yet they still can't get off the bloody mailing list five years later so they're counted as a user.

Does anyone else remember AOL calculating their 'membership' by 'the number of free software CDs they'd given away?

Can you spout digital bollocks? London is hiring a Chief Digital Officer



They should just go to the DevOps conference you're constantly pushing at the moment and throw a brick to choose their candidate.

Any one of the knowledge-free buzzword-wibblers that feel the need to attend a conference about the fairy-fart that is DevOps should be more than sufficiently fluent in techno-bollox to take the London CDO role on ...

Have we got a new, hip compound IT phrase for you! Enter... UserDev


We definitely need a new CamelCase industry buzzword

How about DoBO (Department of [the] Bleeding Obvious?

Because that's where this whole article is straight from the top drawer of ...


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