* Posts by caffeine addict

623 posts • joined 6 Jun 2007

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Silent running: Computer sounds are so '90s

caffeine addict
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Re: Sage 50!

Sage 200 was worse than Sage 50 is? Are Sage numbering backwards or was that a typo?

Still, it worked for XBox...

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Take my advice: The only safe ID is a fake ID

caffeine addict
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Re: Kyden-Titty, Fay

Oh, FFS...

Yeah, okay, I feel dense now.

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caffeine addict
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Can someone explain to my friend the "Kyden-Titty, Fay" name? I he gets the "fayk" bit but doesn't get the "yden" bit.

Personally, I often use Burton, Ernie...

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HP Ink CEO: That $550m Apogee buy was to stop rivals slurping it

caffeine addict
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It's friday and I'm hard of thinking. Is this article about the A3 home/office market? Or a professional grade thing?

Because I'm sure they made an A3 inkjet around 2000...

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Apache OpenOffice, the Schrodinger's app: No one knows if it's dead or alive, no one really wants to look inside

caffeine addict
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Re: Team Lotus

Okay, tabs within Excel I can understand, but is that really tabs across the entire Office Suite?

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What do Zuck, Sergey, @Jack and Bezos have in common? They don't want encryption broken

caffeine addict
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Dear Amazon, Twitter, Facebook, and Google.

If encryption in Australia is broken, it is your moral duty to block all traffic coming from Australian IP addresses. The data can't be trusted. You can't trust that it's correct coming in, and you can't trust that any response you give won't be compromised.

Same goes for any international financial service - block all Australian traffic.

It's one thing standing there with your hand in the air. It's another thing to actually stand by it. Do it.

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Don't get THAT personal, says personalised cards firm Moonpig. Dick pics. They mean dick pics

caffeine addict
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I tried to get cards of my junk for 144 family and friends. Moonpig sent me some bull about the Royal Mail and gross indecency...

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Perfect timing for a two-bank TITSUP: Totally Inexcusable They've Stuffed Up Payday

caffeine addict
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Doesn't First Direct use HSBC's infrastructure? Does this mean that their smug video has bitten them in the arse?

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Nameless Right To Be Forgotten Google sueball man tries Court of Appeal – yet again

caffeine addict
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Re: squaremilenews.blogspot.com

You can. But the general effect will be the same, even if Bong haven't deliberately removed him from their results....

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Barclays and RBS on naughty step: Banks told to explain service meltdown to UK politicos

caffeine addict
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I understand why the treasury gets involved if data leaks, banks look dodgy, or they shutdown key infrastructure, but what business is it of theirs if the online banking app goes down for a few hours? The money was still there and accessible, just not through one particular channel.

I get why *we* are annoyed by it, but I don't see what the hell it has to do with the treasury...

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Fat chance: Cholesterol leads boffins to discover world's oldest animal fossil – 558m years old

caffeine addict
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Should have said - yeah, I got that. It just seemed a rather weird joke for our wonderfully childish, pun loving hacks. I'd have expected it the other way round...

Just reminds me of the Tyson Gay headlines...

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/blog/2008/jun/30/computerautocorrectssurname

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caffeine addict
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Why does the subheader refer to "Richardinsonia"?

Is it a joke more subtle than most, or has a bawlderising script/editor got involved somewhere it shouldn't?

( Since this is about rocks and fossils, should that be boulderising? )

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30-up: You know what? Those really weren't the days

caffeine addict
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Re: Ligatures in editors

That ligature font looked really nice at first. Then I saw their code samples and I realised just how awful an idea it was. I'd quite like to be able to *see* === not have to guess it from it's relative width...

I have to admit that I've been tempted by ligatures on the web. Mainly because I quite like the idea of using the word "menu" but have it ligature to the hamburger icon. Strikes me as a nice accessibility wossit.

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Deliveroo to bike food to hungry fanbois queuing to buy iPhones

caffeine addict
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Re: Idea for a new company :

Now I'm wondering what Mitchell & Webb's "Diddlidee" adverts were actually for...

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caffeine addict
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Re: Why anyone would do business with Apple is a mystery.

I told them they could either take it back & give me my refund, or I could place it on the hood of my sighted helper's car & plow it through their front doors in a shower of broken bodies, shattered glass, & chunks of brick. They opted to give me my refund.

Nicely done. I have a strange respect for people who know the right thing to say at the right time, and not 30 minutes later fuming in a local coffee shop.

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Oz government rushes its anti-crypto legislation into parliament

caffeine addict
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Re: Interesting take on the legislation

There's only one possible safe option. Refuse to serve any web traffic from Australia, and refuse to accept any encrypted data from Australia.

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Man cuffed for testing fruit with bum cheek pre-purchase

caffeine addict
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There's no suggestion in the police ledger that he was checking the freshness. Anyone want to research what he claimed he was doing?

Quick goggle reveals "Senior Police Officer Charles Sharp told USA TODAY he does not believe the incident was mental health related."

Are you sure about that...?

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Google's 'other' phone platform turns up in post-apocalyptic mobe

caffeine addict
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It must be. I mean, it's impossible to put a phone down in under 59 seconds...

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HTTPS crypto-shame: TV Licensing website pulled offline

caffeine addict
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Re: TV licensing agency

You don't need a license for a TV.

You need a license to receive TV signals at the time of broadcast. That covers TVs (all channels, possibly including satellite, not just BBC content), computers, and recording devices.

It caused an interesting edge case where it was illegal to watch iPlayer live, but not five minutes after the broadcast ended. They've now closed this loophole and you need a license for all iPlayer content, regardless of when (or if) it was broadcast. That's why you need a login for iPlayer nowadays. (That statement has been downvoted in the past, but contacts in Capita & BBC have assured me it was the driving force behind BBCID).

You don't need a license to have a TV for gaming, computer use, watching purchased prerecord (films, tv, etc), or streaming services like Netflix. Pretty certain you can watch the iPlayer equivalents from ITV/C4/C5 freely, but I haven't checked. I believe that watching broadcast TV that someone else recorded for you is against the rules, but god knows how they'd know.

I believe there used to be a few places where you didn't need a license if you only watched ITV/C4 but that was because BBC signals weren't available in those areas (presumably coastal areas with high cliffs or something. Those dark spots no longer exist.

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'World's favorite airline' favorite among hackers: British Airways site, app hacked for two weeks

caffeine addict
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Bloke on Radio4 this morning sounded like he wanted to go into details of what happened but had been told not to.

He said that the "very sophisticated" attack got card numbers and CVC codes but that encryption hadn't been broken. He also said that they hadn't spotted it, rather one of their trusted partner security firms (presumably one of those sites that verifies other sites are secure - in which case they suck) which suggests that maybe it was something hiding on a form page.

I've not checked the app out. Is it anything more than a wrapper for some html pages? If it is, it sounds like someone actually got in to their system and listened in there, which is quite a lot worse.

Interestingly, Radio4 said (and wasn't contradicted by blokey) that passports numbers had been taken too, but everything since has said otherwise.

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Official: Google Chrome 69 kills off the World Wide Web (in URLs)

caffeine addict
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Re: Reg -- AMP technology

Okay. I didn't mean that's all it does. I meant that's the main reason I normally realise I'm on an amp version. As in it doesn't seem to create (visually) anything that an averagely competent web developer couldn't have done without Google's input.

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caffeine addict
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Re: Reg

You'll (probably) only see amp if you are on a mobile and google search "the register google" (or whatever). Rather than sending you to the actual article it will either send you to a version they're hosting, or one that the news provider has created that it promises is small and mobile friendly. Which, as far as I can tell, normally just means removing the comments section.

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Benchmark smartphone drama: We wouldn't call it cheating, says Huawei, but look, everyone's at it

caffeine addict
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Re: VW

OR allow biomechnical mods. Replace Oscar Pestorious's blade springs with real springs and let him do the 100m and long jump at the same time.

I know he's in prison, but with those new springs he wouldn't be for long. Just after he set a new high jump record...

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5G can help us spy on West Midlands with AI CCTV, giggles UK.gov

caffeine addict
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Since no-one else has said it...

WHY ARE THEY SPENDING MONEY ON [new technology] WHEN HALF THE COUNTRY CAN@T GET [two generations earlier technology] COVERAGE???!!!1!

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Fourth 'Fappening' celeb nude snap thief treated to 8 months in the clink

caffeine addict
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Re: unsavoury incident?

Ms Pacman was the first game character I came to.

Well, that suddenly took an unexpected turn...

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Spies still super upset they can't get at your encrypted comms data

caffeine addict
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They stopped listening to people who didn't say what they wanted before the whole David Nutt mess nearly a decade ago. They're not even pretending nowadays.

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Russian volcanoes fingered for Earth's largest mass extinction

caffeine addict
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When you're talking about timescales in the tens of thousands to millions of years ballpark, do they still count as coincidences?

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caffeine addict
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Re: The Ends of the World

Why? To preserve the species? Are we really all that worth it?

Ultimately, our only worth is so that some future squid creature can create a work of fiction about creating a safari park inhabited by creatures whose DNA was protected by multiple layers of fake tan...

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caffeine addict
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To be honest, I'm not all that concerned about eruptions that last more than about 50 years. It used to be more, but it's going down by about one per year since 1975...

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caffeine addict
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Re: Trumpet

Trump knows all about hot yellow erup...

Hang on. I've just remembered which site I'm on.

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Cobbler feels the shoe-leather: An IP address is still not a human

caffeine addict
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Does this mean that anyone running a teeny tiny tor exit node is safe from accusations based on IP address?

If this were to be followed in the UK, would it also cover people who have a BT and allow a bit of their connection to be used by the BT cloud thing that is cluttering the 2G wifi round my way?

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It's a phone with a peel, but you'll have to wait a bit more for retro Nokia

caffeine addict
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Re: Bogus copies to be replaced

Sadly, the ones you can buy are all bogus...

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Rights groups challenge UK cops over refusal to hand over info on IMSI catchers

caffeine addict
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Plod does love hiding from FOI requests.

I once asked how many people got speeding tickets, per month, along the length of the Cambridge A14 in a given year. Not where on the road. Not how fast. Not "camera, averaging, or plod". Just how many in each month.

Guess what their answer was?

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Politicians fume after Amazon's face-recog AI fingers dozens of them as suspected crooks

caffeine addict
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Re: RE: Find the racism...

Looking at the matches it does look like more caucasians where matched than african americans anyway.

I don't think that's disputed. The suggestion was that a African American face was more likely to trigger a false positive.

Surely if the training dataset had a statistically significant set of one type of facial characteristics like African American it would have been BETTER at spotting those matches (assuming it works!).

Depends on what the training dataset was. The training was probably done using all the faces Amazon could find, sure. But the matching was done against a small set with an unrepresentative racial balance...

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caffeine addict
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Find the racism...

The implied conclusion of the article is that the system can't correctly identify black faces. Which is quite possible considering how bad AI is at spotting black faces anyway.

But given that the prison system contains a disproportionate number of African Americans, it would be interesting to know if the results were skewed by the pool of criminal photos having a disproportionate number of black faces in it.

Not saying race wasn't a factor, just wondering where...

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Sysadmin trained his offshore replacements, sat back, watched ex-employer's world burn

caffeine addict
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Re: This smells like BS.

Shutting down every data centre sounds a touch far fetched, I agree.

But, I can see the benefits of occasionally taking a data centre offline, then doing various hard shutdown tests to see what comes back up properly.

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You wanna be an alpha... tester of The Register's redesign? Step this way

caffeine addict
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Re: Again?

Not that it's in any way accurate anyway. My (unprotected) IP address makes my location bounce between London, York, Carlisle and somewhere in the west country (if I use PlusNet), London, Rugby or Swindon (IIRC, if I use Virgin) and London, Ireland (just "Ireland"), Cambridge and Welwyn if I'm at work. Even Three frequently gives me an IP address outside the UK if several streaming services are to believed.

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caffeine addict
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Re: Again?

It's all come from information your browser supplied, so hardly personal info. If you're worried about that level of identification, tor and vpn are both over that way...

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caffeine addict
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Tributes are usually virgins...

Sorry... I forgot we were all in the tech field. There will be enough of them around.

(This makes it awkward that I'm about to go test it myself, doesn't it? Ah, balls.)

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Your phone may be able to clean up snaps – but our AI is much better at touching up, say boffins

caffeine addict
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For the love of god, don't let an AI "learn" about grumble flicks. It'll lock itself in a room and start creating artefacts of its own...

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caffeine addict
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Re: Huh

That was exactly my first thought. If they can remove text that's obliterating an image (interesting to know how they guess what should be underneath) then removing a subtle semi-transparent watermark should be simple.

But... how does it know what is text "noise"? If you feed it a street scene, will it go and rip the names off all the shop signs?

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Leatherbound analogue password manager: For the hipster who doesn't mind losing everything

caffeine addict
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Companies should give them out to their users. Anyone found to have used it for the intended purposes just fired from a canon.

Similar (ish) recent job I had here.

PM : The website for users to access HR. Add a button to print the page.

Me : But... why? The browser does that.

PM : Not all users will know that.

Me : Okay. So what about if I make it so that everyone who presses that button has their contact details forwarded to HR for not being able to use a web browser?

PM : No.

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Jimmy Hill feted in Shoreditch

caffeine addict
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200sq ft is "enormous"?

10ft x 20ft.

Apparently the estate agent was right when they called our front garden "enormous"...

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caffeine addict
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Agreed. Shame about whoever the other one is supposed to be though...

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Atari accuses El Reg of professional trolling and making stuff up. Welp, here's the interview tape for you to decide...

caffeine addict
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Re: ATARI is like NOKIA, some chinese guy bought the company name

That's a tad unfair to Nokia. Basically all phones come out of China nowadays. Sure, it's not a 3210 indistructaphone, but the "N" series phones don't pretend to be. They're half decent specced phones in a milled aluminium shell that's more deserving of the Nokia name than any of the MS devices were. The name has been licensed by a company trying to make good from it.

Atari is a different matter. The name gets slapped on pretty much anything regardless of quality by whoever owns it this week. Similar can be said of the Commodore devices that appear every now and then.

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Developer’s code worked, but not in the right century

caffeine addict
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They've started to censor "Head" from Lou Reed's 'Take A Walk On The Wild Side' on the radio.

Absolute Radio, by some chance?

Yeah, the line "But she never lost her head, even while giving ____" shows how stupid censoring one word is. They'd probably say "it's the meaning, not the word", but if so why have I recently heard them play the lyrics "will she go down on you in a theatre" and "she can only come when she's on top"?

Censorship is sh*t.

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Office 365 celebrates National Beer Day by popping out for a pint

caffeine addict
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Re: Remember the good old days?

Try being around in the mid-90s when ads in computer magazines were offering CDs with the entire contents of the Internet on them :)

It was great that they gave them away free every month, but needing a new one every month was a bit wasteful.

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caffeine addict
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Re: We're all good!

I prefer fake matey-ness to the bane of my life "Windows has recovered from an unexpected shutdown".

No, you fecking didn't. Nothing has been "recovered". You shit the bed, threw the sheets out the window, and are now sitting on a soiled mattress boasting about how everything's under control.

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BOFH: Got that syncing feeling, hm? I've looked at your computer and the Outlook isn't great

caffeine addict
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Off topic

On that Union Carbide link, there's a picture of a young girl with hearing issues (#24 maybe?).

Never occurred to me that Indians could have blue eyes. That kid's eyes fecking bore into you. I feel personally responsible for the disaster despite being 8 at the time. And in the UK. And she's smiling. Christ know what would happen if she's angry. Some kind of X-men kind of thing, I assume.

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Da rude sand storm seizes the Opportunity, threatens to KO rover

caffeine addict
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Re: God speed little robot

Failing that, I assume the solar panels can adjust to get maximum light, so why couldn't they have been designed to clamshell shut, turn upside down, or vibrate slightly?

( Anyone else suddenly thinking of a rover doing jazz-hands with its panels? )

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