Posts by Pen-y-gors

Interesting research

and for once it looks like they have done some solid number crunching with a decent data sample. So many of these 'surveys' and 'reports' seem to be based on a sample of 10 losers they grabbed at the nearest Kwikimart checkout. Still not sure if it tells us anything we didn't know though.

Has anyone done any research on the mental impact of El Reg Likes? Personally I find up votes give me a serious boost, nearly as good as black coffee and 85% chocolate. But then so do down votes as they let me mentally pour scorn on the poor misguided fools who are clearly wrong, and who thus justify my feeling of incredible superiority.

And also, the article says "some or most of which could easily be left in the "Luddite" box" as if being a Luddite is somehow a bad thing.

So.....

My excuse for having a library of 100,000 grumble-flicks downloaded from Pr0nhub is that "I was fingerprinting them to analyse network traffic"

I suppose it's worth a try...

That's all right then

So, avoiding £15m increases due to The-Exit-that-shall-not-be-named. That's wonderful. We can spend it on the NHS - oh, hang on, it's not actually extra money is it? Okay, we can use it to train some unemployed teenagers as nurses, to replace all the Portuguese ones who are going home.

<sorrow mode on>Damn, damn, damn, I promised myself not to be a remoaning snowflake today. Failed again</sorrow>

But what about...

<grumpy old sod mode>

The Yanks can keep thousands of ancient 737s flying and carrying passengers safely, the Russians launch satellites using a rocket from the fifties, but can the Brits keep a single old Vulcan flying? Can they heck!

Mutter, mutter....

</off>

Ransomware?

Acronis released a ransomware survey conducted in the US, UK, Australia, Germany, France and Japan

Personally I read that at first as meaning they'd released a survey loaded with ransomware.

I suppose that might help make their point...

What's the EU ever done for us?

Well, apart from the roads and aquaducts, it looks like GDPR is going to be near the top of the list.

Wonderful! Hopefully now we can nail spammers arse to the wall, financially at least!

And talking of quack medical gadgets...

Saw this doozy in the Daily Fail this morning (yes, I know, I buy it for the servants to read)

"It’s a vibrator…. but not as you know it: New 2-in-1 wand promises to give you better ORGASMS and reduce bladder weakness by strengthening pelvic floor muscles

Sculpt uses a combination of light energy from red and infrared light-emitting diodes (LEDs), thermal heat, and therapeutic vibration to help rebuild collagen to improve vaginal tissue laxity and restore the overall health of the pelvic floor"

The mind boggles.

Cosmic palaeontologist?

I love the concept!

But... it's rather rare for two such terrifying voids to smash into each other. -surely in an almost infinite universe, very rare events must be happening all the time?

Fighting back?

It would be nice if one or more of the anti-malware companies could implement a 'Windows slurp' block as an enhancement, perhaps only on the 'premium' versions? Could work wonders for sales.

What could possibly etc...

Yep, a silent electric vehicle sneaking up behind a poor pedestrian who really isn't expecting any motorised transport in the vicinity. In theory it will stop, in theory...

But I'd like to watch as the car decides it needs to take evasive action and steers off the path, straight into the Thames. Hope the test pilots can breathe underwater.

The times they are a-changin'

Some interesting observations... nine months back any snarky pro-Remain trolling comment on El Reg tended to get about as many down votes as up votes, which mirrors the national mood at the time. In recent days the ratio is now more like 2-1 in favour of Remain and anti-Brexit comments. Does this tell us anything about the national mood now compared to last year?

Viva Roget

I did like congerie - I must try and use it more in conversation.

A good start...

would be to put their best brains to hacking the servers of the Daily Fail, Fox News etc and subtly altering the front page / newsreaders scripts. Nothing too obvious, just a steady drip of slightly more real and less viciously evil content.

Oh wonderful

So when our aircraft-less aircraft carriers finally get some aircraft they won't actually be able to fly.

This could end up being a more expensive fiasco than Brexit! Will any Minister be sacked for this?

[On second thoughts, no, that's silly. *nothing* is going to beat Brexit!]

Early warning?

Why didn't that clever Mr Farage warn us about this last June?

More importantly....

The new notes are utter rubbish - as currency. They may well last longer but they're a bugger to work with. Once bent they won't unbend completely to live flat in a bundle; Counting them is thus a nightmare, compounded by the fatty slipperiness which means you can easily miscount. Aargh...bring back the sovereign!

Worrying thought

Will they be able to get visas? They might be Isiamisisist trrrsts from Yemenistan who are only *pretending* to be British primary school girls. Cunning devil, Johnny Foreigner.

Of all time?

Branded "the most incompetent procurement of all time"

that's a pretty impressive claim, given all the other incompetent procurement exercises the MoD (and, to be fair, other government departments) have been involved in.

In terms of overall cost, how about a couple of aircraft carriers with no aircraft?

Much too limited a scale.

What we need is an army of flying drones, and require every dog-owner to buy one. They will follow the dog wherever it goes and scoop up the nastiness wherever it falls, as well as soak up any liquid with a large sponge.

Or, of course, a much more radical and hi-tech solution, require every dog owner to buy a supply of recyclable plastic bags AND USE THEM!

Daily Fail ?

I'm impressed that the Daily Heil felt the need to search for a manual on how to use a car to hurt and kill people. I suspect that most people could work it out for themselves. Or possibly read the Fail 'news' stories over past years and see reports which give lots of useful hints and tips on how to do it. Does this mean that the Daily Fail can now be classified as a 'terrorist training manual' and can therefore be shut down and the Editor and Owner locked up in Belmarsh? Please? After all, freedom of the press is one thing, but not when they publish information that is of use to potential terrorists.

El Reg?

Loading in bits? Jumping around? Like when loading El Reg on my phone and I try and tap the 'Forums' link just as the screen jumps and displays an ad in the same place for some obscure and expensive bit of corporate kit that I will never want!

My fault for not having an ad-blocker I suppose, or at least that's what a judge would probably say. And I suppose it does earn some beer-tokens for El Reg

VPNs?

And next off is a ban on VPNs...