* Posts by Pen-y-gors

1796 posts • joined 1 Oct 2010

Zuckerberg's absolutely mental: Brain sensors that read YOUR MIND at 100 words a minute

Pen-y-gors
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Share and enjoy

"Give everyone the power to share anything with anyone."

There are already caveats - sharing piccies of your naughty bits (or anyone else's) is evil of the most satanic type, and must never be allowed under any circumstances. Oh yes, and neither must piccies of a mummy feeding her baby.

I think that mission statement needs working on...

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Can you make a warzone delivery drone? UK.gov wants to give you cash

Pen-y-gors
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Think outside the box

Why not just put the drones in the frontline instead of the meatware? Eliminate need for resupply - just fly home to pick up a new battery pack for the frikkin' laser.

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30,000 London gun owners hit by Met Police 'data breach'

Pen-y-gors
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On leave?

" the key person responsible was on leave."

probably permanently...

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Regulate This! Time to subject algorithms to our laws

Pen-y-gors
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Re: Plase stop using the word algorithms

Calling for algorithms to be regulated makes about as much sense as calling for mathematical theorems to be regulated.

Isn't that exactly what dim-but-crazy Amber and barking-mad Theresa are wanting to do with encryption theorems.

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Re: Institution unknown

I was unaware that there was such thing as an English Parliament. Pray, where does it convene?

At Westminster. Let's face it, any decisions made there are purely in the interests of English Tories, they don't give a damn about the interests of Wales, Scotland and Norn Ireland, even on non-devolved matters, so I think 'English parliament' is pretty accurate.

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Burger King's 'OK Google' sad ad saga somehow gets worse

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It's their property, they can do what they want with it.

I don't think anyone disputes their legal right to do it, but morally it stinks! It's also stupid - just think of the free (good) publicity they get for shipping several thousand T-shirts and caps to a Sudanese refugee camp.

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Pen-y-gors
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Please Sir?

What does "doubling down" mean?

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Deeming Facebook a 'publisher' of users' posts won't tackle paedo or terrorist content

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No, no, no...

That comment is sooooo non-PC.

These days we refer to them as 'care homes', not orphanages. This isn't the nineteenth century.

But otherwise you're probably right. Although I believe some of them are quite lazy and have the care home residents delivered to their flat.

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Pen-y-gors
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Good article

Well balanced summary of the arguments.

If the Times win, how will they stand with people publishing an advert (do they still have a personal column?) with a rather bad haiku "A grey goose in dusky sky. A child cries. No one listens - Baudelaire" What's the problem? It's a code for today's IP address for a hidden kiddiepr0n site! 145.253.155.037 (no, not really, just kidding he says, crossing his fingers that it isn't actually, by a billion to one chance, *actually* a kiddiepr0n site) Or maybe it's a trrrrst training site?

That sounds like publishing material that helps criminals...

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Brexit factor lacking in Industrial Strategy, say MPs

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Replacement funds?

"the government should be ready to make good any net shortfall in the short-term with further funding for science.”"

The cheques will be delivered by the government fleet of flying pigs.

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Apple wets its pants over Swatch ad tagline

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Re: Tick Different?

But some people don't...

The clock in Lord Vetinari’s anteroom didn’t tick right. Sometimes the tick was just a fraction late, sometimes the tock was early. Occasionally, one or the other didn’t happen at all. This wasn’t really noticeable until you’d been in there for five minutes, by which time small but significant parts of the brain were going crazy.

Sir Pterry got there first.

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Official science we knew all along: Facebook makes you sad :-(

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Interesting research

and for once it looks like they have done some solid number crunching with a decent data sample. So many of these 'surveys' and 'reports' seem to be based on a sample of 10 losers they grabbed at the nearest Kwikimart checkout. Still not sure if it tells us anything we didn't know though.

Has anyone done any research on the mental impact of El Reg Likes? Personally I find up votes give me a serious boost, nearly as good as black coffee and 85% chocolate. But then so do down votes as they let me mentally pour scorn on the poor misguided fools who are clearly wrong, and who thus justify my feeling of incredible superiority.

And also, the article says "some or most of which could easily be left in the "Luddite" box" as if being a Luddite is somehow a bad thing.

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TCP/IP headers leak info about what you're watching on Netflix

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So.....

My excuse for having a library of 100,000 grumble-flicks downloaded from Pr0nhub is that "I was fingerprinting them to analyse network traffic"

I suppose it's worth a try...

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UK.gov cuts deal with Microsoft to avoid £15m post-Brexit price hike

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That's all right then

So, avoiding £15m increases due to The-Exit-that-shall-not-be-named. That's wonderful. We can spend it on the NHS - oh, hang on, it's not actually extra money is it? Okay, we can use it to train some unemployed teenagers as nurses, to replace all the Portuguese ones who are going home.

<sorrow mode on>Damn, damn, damn, I promised myself not to be a remoaning snowflake today. Failed again</sorrow>

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Boeing 737 turns 50

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But what about...

<grumpy old sod mode>

The Yanks can keep thousands of ancient 737s flying and carrying passengers safely, the Russians launch satellites using a rocket from the fifties, but can the Brits keep a single old Vulcan flying? Can they heck!

Mutter, mutter....

</off>

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Friends, we have a real treat for you. A roundup of this week's stunning enterprise storage news

Pen-y-gors
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Ransomware?

Acronis released a ransomware survey conducted in the US, UK, Australia, Germany, France and Japan

Personally I read that at first as meaning they'd released a survey loaded with ransomware.

I suppose that might help make their point...

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An echo chamber full of fake news? Blame Google and Facebook, says Murdoch chief

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Re: Hillarious

Search for how they treated Jörg Sprave for instance.

You don't need to go to so much effort - just read any Sun front page. Or page 2. Or page 3. or...

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How their GDPR ignorance could protect you from your denial

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What's the EU ever done for us?

Well, apart from the roads and aquaducts, it looks like GDPR is going to be near the top of the list.

Wonderful! Hopefully now we can nail spammers arse to the wall, financially at least!

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Boeing-backed US upstart reckons it'll be building electric airliners

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Re: 10-50 seat commercial passenger aircraft are a thing.

@jmch

Face it, if the TSA drones are involved, they'll manage to drag screening 20 passengers out for a couple of hours. After all, what else have they got to do all day? If there's no passengers to piss off, they're hardly going to want to sit down and read a book, are they? ("Look, Spot, see Spot Run" gets a bit repetitive after the tenth time)

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Pen-y-gors
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Re: 10-50 seat commercial passenger aircraft are a thing.

turned up with no airport screening delay

Why would there be no airport screening delay? It's a basic requirement of flight. If you don't spend two hours being strip-searched by the TSA before flying, then you can't fly. Simples. (How on earth did the Wright Brothers even get off the ground without being blown up?)

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Ex-IBMer sues Google for $10bn – after his web ad for 'divine honey cancer cure' was pulled

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And talking of quack medical gadgets...

Saw this doozy in the Daily Fail this morning (yes, I know, I buy it for the servants to read)

"It’s a vibrator…. but not as you know it: New 2-in-1 wand promises to give you better ORGASMS and reduce bladder weakness by strengthening pelvic floor muscles

Sculpt uses a combination of light energy from red and infrared light-emitting diodes (LEDs), thermal heat, and therapeutic vibration to help rebuild collagen to improve vaginal tissue laxity and restore the overall health of the pelvic floor"

The mind boggles.

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Re: They walk amongst us

@AC

As for homoeopaths, they are wilfully negligent as they prevent people seeking proper medical attention

As for homoeopaths, they are wilfully negligent as IF they prevent people seeking proper medical attention

...good ones don't! (See earlier reply)

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Pen-y-gors
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Re: They walk amongst us

Makes you wonder how homeopathists gets away with it .

Simple - any proper homeopathic practitioner (and I have met a number who are qualified GPs) knows the limitations - they tend to use homeopathy as complementary treatment, not as an alternative. No worthwhile homeopath would recommend a homeopathic treatment instead of following the normal treatment for cancer or other serious conditions, or instead of a cast to mend a broken leg. But their homeopathic treatments may help with reducing side effects etc. Many people have found they do. Personally I'm not convinced by the theory, but many people report positive outcomes.

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Pen-y-gors
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But seriously though folks....

Obviously the guy is barking mad, but dangerously so. If he manages to persuade some poor sod to use his silly 'cure' instead of having chemo then they will die.Yes, they may well die anyway, but that's not the point. And never mind about the benefits of offering them 'hope'. There are a variety of legal offences for people who knowingly cause, or attempt to cause, harm and death to other people.

It all sounds rather silly, and no more than a minor pain in the bum for big G who will have to waste time and money telling him to go and practice auto-fornication, but serious action needs to be taken to stop these charlatans before they kill someone.

I think he should have his day in court, but as the accused, followed by several years in a nice warm cell where he can chat to his preferred sky-pilot.

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Customer satisfaction is our highest priority… OK, maybe second-highest… or third...

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Re: Public wifi?

Personally I prefer to drink coffee.

Although, to be fair, I remember my first visit to a Star*ucks (one of very few). After staring in horror at their lengthy menu covering half the wall, I just asked for 'coffee please' and they didn't bat an eyelid, just gave me a straight forward black coffee. Didn't taste too bad either.

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Riddle of cannibal black hole pairs solved ... nearly: Astroboffins explain all to El Reg

Pen-y-gors
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Cosmic palaeontologist?

I love the concept!

But... it's rather rare for two such terrifying voids to smash into each other. -surely in an almost infinite universe, very rare events must be happening all the time?

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Put down your coffee and admire the sheer amount of data Windows 10 Creators Update will slurp from your PC

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Fighting back?

It would be nice if one or more of the anti-malware companies could implement a 'Windows slurp' block as an enhancement, perhaps only on the 'premium' versions? Could work wonders for sales.

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Londoners will be trialling driverless cars in pedestrianised area

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What could possibly etc...

Yep, a silent electric vehicle sneaking up behind a poor pedestrian who really isn't expecting any motorised transport in the vicinity. In theory it will stop, in theory...

But I'd like to watch as the car decides it needs to take evasive action and steers off the path, straight into the Thames. Hope the test pilots can breathe underwater.

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Teenagers think Doritos are cooler than Apple

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Re: Oreos

Kind of like the *bastard* circular offspring of a bourbon and a custard cream?

FTFY

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Pen-y-gors
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Re: Who gives a stuff what teenagers think?

People selling to teenagers care what teenagers think.

You mean teenagers today have access to money? Of their own? Believe me, no good will come of it. What happened to seven-year unpaid apprenticeships?

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'No deal better than bad deal' approach to Brexit 'unsubstantiated'

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The times they are a-changin'

Some interesting observations... nine months back any snarky pro-Remain trolling comment on El Reg tended to get about as many down votes as up votes, which mirrors the national mood at the time. In recent days the ratio is now more like 2-1 in favour of Remain and anti-Brexit comments. Does this tell us anything about the national mood now compared to last year?

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Friday storage congeries, convocation, collection, compilation, cumulation

Pen-y-gors
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Viva Roget

I did like congerie - I must try and use it more in conversation.

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Facebook, Mozilla and Craigslist Craig fund fake news firefighter

Pen-y-gors
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A good start...

would be to put their best brains to hacking the servers of the Daily Fail, Fox News etc and subtly altering the front page / newsreaders scripts. Nothing too obvious, just a steady drip of slightly more real and less viciously evil content.

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Head of US military kit-testing slams F-35, says it's scarcely fit to fly

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Oh wonderful

So when our aircraft-less aircraft carriers finally get some aircraft they won't actually be able to fly.

This could end up being a more expensive fiasco than Brexit! Will any Minister be sacked for this?

[On second thoughts, no, that's silly. *nothing* is going to beat Brexit!]

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Confidence in £70m customs system has 'collapsed', warns Treasury Committee

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Early warning?

Why didn't that clever Mr Farage warn us about this last June?

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SpaceX wows world with a ho-hum launch of a reused rocket, landing it on a tiny boring barge

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Stage 2?

Getting stage 2 back from orbital height without burning up could be tricky, but could they get sneaky and leave it up there, perhaps to be re-used as part of a space station (with a bit of re-fitting of course)

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New plastic banknote plans now upsetting environmental campaigners

Pen-y-gors
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More importantly....

The new notes are utter rubbish - as currency. They may well last longer but they're a bugger to work with. Once bent they won't unbend completely to live flat in a bundle; Counting them is thus a nightmare, compounded by the fatty slipperiness which means you can easily miscount. Aargh...bring back the sovereign!

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Security co-operation unlikely to change post Brexit, despite threats

Pen-y-gors
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Re: @wolfetone

@Marketing Hack

And as for taking my people out of an existing agreement, I wasn't in favor of Brexit, but that ship has sailed.

The ship has sailed, but there is still a high likelihood that it will break down before it gets to open water and has to be towed back to dock, having dumped the captain and officers overboard.

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The good things...

I'm a bit confused.

We have a string of politicians mentioning the good things that they want to keep after Brexit, including security co-operation, but a whole long list of other things, like the single market, no customs problems, access to the UK for 'useful' foreigners (nurses etc), financial services passporting etc

We've already got all these things, so why the ???? are we withdrawing from the EU and then wasting years and billions trying to get them back again, almost certainly without success.

Just curious. It seems an odd way to proceed.

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Pen-y-gors
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I could have been worse. Imagine what the letter would have looked like if the more unhinged members of the government had wound up in charge.

You mean there are ministers even *more* unhinged than Mayhem? I know there are several who are serious swivel-eyed loonies, but she is serious deep-down barking.

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How to leak data from an air-gapped PC – using, er, a humble scanner

Pen-y-gors
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Re: Wait... days?

Hand up

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ESA picks final two ExoMars landing site candidates

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Re: Google Maps link

Good description of rural Powys.

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Pen-y-gors
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Mawrth Vallis

Da iawn, bois!

But if they were going to do a proper job of naming, maybe they shouldn't mix Latin and Welsh - how about Dyffryn Mawrth or Cwm Mawrth? Or even, to encourage settlers, Cwm Mawrthlon?

Either way, does that mean that it comes under the jurisdiction of the Welsh Assembly? Can we send the Welsh 'Leavers' there to establish a new colony - Patagonia was very successful!

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Hertfordshire primary school girls prepare for World Robotics Champs

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Worrying thought

Will they be able to get visas? They might be Isiamisisist trrrsts from Yemenistan who are only *pretending* to be British primary school girls. Cunning devil, Johnny Foreigner.

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Pen-y-gors
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Re: Donated a tenner

ditto (but not the skint bit, thankfully)

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UK's 'homebrew firmware' Chinooks set to be usable a mere 16 years late

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Of all time?

Branded "the most incompetent procurement of all time"

that's a pretty impressive claim, given all the other incompetent procurement exercises the MoD (and, to be fair, other government departments) have been involved in.

In terms of overall cost, how about a couple of aircraft carriers with no aircraft?

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What a time to be alive: drone pooper-scoopers are a thing now

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Much too limited a scale.

What we need is an army of flying drones, and require every dog-owner to buy one. They will follow the dog wherever it goes and scoop up the nastiness wherever it falls, as well as soak up any liquid with a large sponge.

Or, of course, a much more radical and hi-tech solution, require every dog owner to buy a supply of recyclable plastic bags AND USE THEM!

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Pen-y-gors
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Re: Why restrict it to dog poo?

France?

Ah yes, but it's traditional. Apparently the courtiers of Louis the whatever used to perform their bodilly functions in the corridors at Versailles.

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Dishwasher has directory traversal bug

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Re: Bewildered. (That's grown-up speak for "wtf")

But a really good self-loading dishwasher would be neat! Of course it would need a droid extension that wanders around the house picking up dirty coffee cups and plates, in which case it WOULD need internet access so that it could message you to ask 'have you finished with this half-eaten pork pie?'

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Robo-Uber T-boned, rolls onto side, self-driving rides halted

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Re: Learning to deal with shitty drivers

for human drivers and for robots!

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