* Posts by Mark York

23 posts • joined 31 May 2007

Hundreds queue for Doctor Who Hamlet tickets

Mark York
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Spoilers

"Instead of Hamlet dying at the end he regenerates"

Thanks a heap

Sword severed hand for obvious reasons.

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Colonel: Bowman army comms 'astonishingly bad'

Mark York
Black Helicopters

Racal II

Racal Seaton 1990 - 1998 & got out before the wave of redundancies started.

I had the pleasure of revisting the old Seaton site yesterday, the pleasure being that after being empty since "2000" & still present up until January of this year, its finally been demolished.

They were touting Bowman at my interview & still hadn't got anywhere by the time I left, all that came in was Six Sigma & Computing Devices of Canada as partners IIRC.

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Breakup with Sadville lion ends in kidnap plot, duct-taped dog

Mark York
Paris Hilton

Sounds Familier

"When the police arrived, they found not only a taser, but a pair of handcuffs, a roll of duct tape, and a BB gun. And her dog was in the bathroom, duct tape around his jaw. Apparently, Gogi made a bit too much noise during the break-in."

Sounds like normal behaviour for women from North Carolina.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/08/08/mckinney_confusion/

PH just because.

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Aussie has answer to save Earth from asteroid attack

Mark York
Coat

Paper Title

It's 3am & I am bleary eyed & in pain, I read her paper title as A Bloody Solar Sail Concept for the Deflection of 99942 Apophis.

Doing a Arthur Dent & getting my dressing gown.

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MPs lambast BBFC over Batman

Mark York
Paris Hilton

Parental Guidence

"When I went to see the film, there was a parent bringing a child in who couldn't have been more than 8 years old. Certainly shouldn't have been able to see it, but when are parents going to be made to take some responsibility for their actions?"

I saw this film with my wife & kids, youngest son (9), daughter (13) & son (16) while in Toronto last week.

IMO a lot of the violence such as "the pencil trick" & knife in the mouth was implied without being extremely graphic, with the case of the former the youngest didn't even register what had just happened.

It was obvious what was going to happen to Harvey, but thought his injuries were very OTT in a comic book way & while disturbing it didn't faze the youngest either.

We were asked how old the kids were while paying for the tickets & no comments regarding it's suitablity were raised, keeping in mind that every episode of Stargate SG1\Atlantis\any other TV program gets a warning at the start of the program & prior to the recommencment of the episode after every ad break stating "This program contains adult themes, including mild horror etc. Viewer discretion is advised", I took the rating as given with it's suitability for younger children with parental accompanyment.

In retrospect had I been more aware of some of the content, I'm still unsure if I would have taken the family group in to see this film or not.

Should it have been a 15, yes but only if The Joker had been seen actually slicing the cheeks of his victims or TwoFaces disfigurment had been less clinically clean than it actually was.

Paris because I wouldn't take my kids to see one of her movies.

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Cash'n'Carrion: A lean, mean, fighting machine

Mark York
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BOFH mug

Nuff said!

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Sumerians cracked world's oldest joke

Mark York
Dead Vulture

Why do ducks have big feet?

To put out forest fires.

Why do elephants have big feet?

To put out flaming ducks.

Dead Avian chosen in light of the punchline.

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Sky One to resurrect Blake's 7?

Mark York
Alien

"Too right - Orac was anything but subservient"

Zen frequently in the first series refused direct commands & aborted computer functions when the Liberator was in danger from things he could not rationalise, outright refused to explain the working of the teleport, stating that 'Wisdom must be gathered, it cannot be given'.

Insisting that Servalan call him Zen (a trait he picked up in series 1 when addressed by Avon as computer, almost shouting back ZEN! as his reply) during the 3rd series when the Federation take the Liberator .

Zen's last despairing line at his failure is heartbreaking as he refers to himself in as "I" for the first time ever.

Jenna: "I don't think it likes you somehow"

Avon: "I'll have to reprogram this computer"

Jenna: "That still won't make you likeable".

Alien cos it looks like Moloch.

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Winamp blighted by bug brace

Mark York
Coat

Reap the wild Winamp.

Reap the wild Winamp.

I'll get me long mac as worn in the Vienna video.

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Remembering the Commodore SX-64

Mark York
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One of my favorites

We used to attend computer trade shows to sell modem\software packages.

At Comodore shows this was my preferred demo model, despite the weight & tiny screen, it was a breeze to setup as only had to plug it into the mains & attach the modem & the software\RS232 communications cartridge.

Take 1 screen, 1 "datasette", one 1541 & one C64 into the Novotel Hammersmith & spend ages looking for all the cables as you set it up?

Not me just just carry the SX64 into the stand & go. :)

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Pentagon: Electromagnetic pulse bombs from 2012

Mark York
Flame

Fission Chips

Lets see - 1 every 15 mins outside DVLA, all Police sites, Tax office, government, ID and Passport offices - sounds great.

Even better aimed at the chavs who insist on parking (if you can count screeching to a halt & braking, or accelerating away later as parking manoevers, threatening law abiding citizens & young children) at the rear of the retail park backing on to my house, who generously allow us to share their taste in music all through our houses & kick footballs against the rear of Currys all weekend, whom the police are powerless to act against.

Half a dozen fried chav mobiles & accompanying stereo systems, bring it on.

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Ubuntu's latest OS not so Gutsy

Mark York
Coat

Umbongo

Umbongo? Hahahaha! These funny sounding African words, eh! Gosh, they're all the same.

A little pathetic.

No actually it is (or was a little drink).

Way down deep in the middle of the Congo, A hippo took an apricot, a guava and a mango. He stuck it with the others and he danced a dainty tango. The rhino said, "I know... we'll call it Um Bongo!" Um Bongo, Um Bongo, they drink it in the Congo! The python picked the passion-fruit, The marmoset the mandarine, the parrot painted packets that the whole caboodle landed in. So when it comes to sun and fun and goodness in the jungle, they all prefer the sunny, funny one they call Um Bongo!

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Hypersonic hydrogen airliner to bitchslap Concorde

Mark York
Joke

To the tune of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Hypersonic hydrogen airliner to bitchslap Concorde

Even though the cost of it is something quite enormous

If you fly it fast enough, it might become explosive

Hypersonic hydrogen airliner to bitchslap Concorde

Um diddle um diddle um diddle ay

Um diddle um diddle um diddle ay

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Beeb confirms Davison-Tennant Who hook-up

Mark York
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12 Regenerations = 13 Incarnations & Possibly The Valeyard In The Mix

"Somewhere in there though, should be the bad Doctor, the one that tried to frame, well himself really in Trial of a Timelord, the 2nd Colin Baker series".

The Valeyard is an amalgam of the Doctor's darker side, somewhere between his twelfth and thirteenth regenerations.

Where's the Two Heart Icon when you need one?

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Hampshire copper in bus flash outrage

Mark York
Alert

This may help us with our enquiries

http://www.hampshire.police.uk/Internet/localpolicing/safer/Safer+Neighbourhoods+bus+artwork.htm

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AI egghead: Human-robot humping, marriage by 2050

Mark York
Coat

Jumping on the bandwagon

"Once you have a story like 'I had sex with a robot, and it was great!' appear someplace like Cosmo magazine, I'd expect many people to jump on the bandwagon," he said.

I'd expect many people to jump on the robot personally.

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Meet Mark Radcliffe: The man who rules open source law

Mark York

Stop!!!!!!!

Carry on.

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Solar waves make Earth ring like a bell

Mark York

The idea has merit

only reverse it, I for one would be quite happy to wedge a or even several Vauxhall Nova's into the Earth, preferably with a few chav's still inside it.

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Atlantis readies for departure after ISS computer repairs

Mark York

Record for the longest time a woman has spent spacewalking

Was she shoe shopping by any chance?

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So what's in a URL? The Reg URL?

Mark York

.co.uk OK by me

& now for something completely different.

Make your own dead parrot sketch here

Just add:

IBM Blue instead of Norwegian Blue

URL instead of Plummage

Gates instead of Fjords

.com instead of slug

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2012 Olympics logo debuts to whalesong

Mark York

& another NSFW tasteful one here following on with the LS theme.

http://img9.imagepile.net/img9/12224olympicgschpunken.gif

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Mark York

Lisa Simpson?

Tasteful animated gif here.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v156/tithers/london-copy.gif

Courtesy of the master fiddler himself Tithers.

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Doctor Who faces extermination

Mark York

Can't do the maths, 12 regenerations means 13 Doctors.

Susan: "Is he really..?"

1st Doctor: "Yes. Yes, I'm afraid so. Regeneration?"

5th Doctor: "Fourth."

1st Doctor: "Goodness me! So there are five of me now!"

The Valeyard is\was a potential distillation of the negative side of The Doctor, between his 12th & 13th Incarnations.

Exceptions

The Master - Extended his life by hi-jacking the body of Tremas, The High Council of Time Lords offered him a whole new regenerative life cycle to rescue The Doctor, re-engineered himself for a new regenerative lifecycle in the VNA's with outside help from the Tzun & then in the TVM he stole yet another body.

DWM also has him assume another body in The Glorious Dead.

The Scream of The Shalka has him existing in a cybernetic suit.

You may want to hide behind the sofa for the next line

RTD may or may not have him as being Mr S........

You can look now.

The Suns scaremongering\getting it wrong aside, each actor typically (Yes Eccleston I'm talking about you) assumes the role for 3 years\series, so that's aproximately another 9 series on top of the current planned 4th (barring accidents).

Apart from that I agree with the comments about ditching the kitchen sink\domestic angle, the gay agenda, lowest common denominator gags ie farting & deus ex machina rushed conclusions etc.

Instead keep the intelligent writers\scripts, humour, the current production values, tight pacing, but allow more intelligent story development with two parters with proper cliff hangers.

Thats my tuppence worth.

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