* Posts by Borg.King

161 posts • joined 8 Apr 2011


Granddaddy of the DIY repair generation John Haynes has loosened his last nut


Re: The Haynes Manual of Life

Death: follow the birth process (sections 1.1 - 1.6) in reverse order.

What should we do with the inevitable box of pieces left over?

Microsoft vows to destroy Office, er, offices: Campus to be demolished and rebuilt


RIP Building 2

I used to have a nice second floor office in building 2, looking out onto the parking lot, but with about 50 yards of trees in-between. All sorts of squirrels and birds to observe.

I guess Lake Bill will be removed too.

Great, you've moved your website or app to HTTPS. How do you test it? Here's a tool to make local TLS certs painless



I've had this whole shebang scripted on Windows Server for several months now. I even have an nginx proxy that's properly certified too. This is hardly a difficult thing to do, and once you've learnt the underpinnings (about three days with trial and error), it's good knowledge to have.

Just make sure you create a certificate with a subject alternate name defined to please Chrome.

A few reasons why cops haven't immediately shot down London Gatwick airport drone menace


Special powers

Under the Terrorism Act or somesuch may well see a ban on public drone sales in the future.

Talk about a GAN-do attitude... AI software bots can see through your text CAPTCHAs


Re: GAN see through

GAN is an acronym for Generative Adversarial Network.

OneDrive Skype integration goes live aaand... OneDrive falls over in Europe


Skype should be simple

Easily editable list of contacts, their current online state, and a button to start a video chat with them.

Anything else is Skype Pro, which I do not need myself. My iPhone can handle making real telephone calls.


Re: Powerpointing the other half into submission

But she can't see the Visio file on her Mac. Better send her a PDF.

Boeing 737 pilots battled confused safety system that plunged aircraft to their deaths – black box


AoA sensor replaced prior to fatal flight

Wasn't the Angle of Attack sensor replaced prior to this last fatal flight of this aircraft?

So far I have heard reports that there were issues on the 3 previous flights to this one, and the sensor had been replaced. Had one faulty sensor been replaced with another one? Had the wrong sensor been replaced? Did the new sensor pass all ground tests on the system before departure? Had the ground tests been properly executed? Has the cockpit been found to determine the state of the MCAS switches?

If the MCAS / AoA system had issues on the previous flights, were those pilots aware of the new equipment operating procedures on the 737 MAX? How did those previous pilots overcome the documented system failures?

The final AAIB report on this will make extremely interesting reading. I hope they find the cockpit voice recorder, though I expect it will just have the two pilots extremely baffled at why their aircraft is repeatedly countermanding their control inputs.

Doctors join wombats in sh!tting bricks to help parents relax about kids chowing down on Lego


What a crap article

Well done.

Wombats literally sh!t bricks – and now boffins reckon they know how


Re: Kinda macabre, but alright

I think speeds of this nature need to be expressed as a factor of Viss, the velocity of the international space station.

(Mines the one with the table of sines/cosines/tangents & logarithms in the pocket)

Want to hack a hole-in-the-wall cash machine for free dosh? It's as easy as Windows XP


Re: "ATM machine"

Is that where you enter your Personal Identification Number number?

Then you can get your hands on all that cash money.

Solid state of fear: Euro boffins bust open SSD, Bitlocker encryption (it's really, really dumb)



It’s like jumping out of a plane with an umbrella instead of a parachute.

Mary Poppins is covered then. That's nice.

Apple's launch confirms one thing: It's determined to kill off the laptop for iPads


Pocket Rocket

The new Mac Mini line looks to be in the same ball park as a refurb Mac Pro (6 core i7, 32GB, 1TB SSD, $2499), but it supports the latest Mac OS X and has Thunderbolt ports.

With some adaptoring, I think it'll even be able to drive my two Apple 30" monitors. I write code, so video resolution/performance has absolutely no bearing on my needs at all.

The new Mac Pro (next year?) needs to be a significant step up to have me looking away from a high end Mac Mini.

Watch closely as NASA deploys the world's biggest parachute at supersonic speeds


Re: re. as big as a size of a house

Are they spherical ducks in a vacuum?

UKIP doubled price of condoms for sale at party conference


Nigel's Condoms

'For when you cannot contain your excitement!'

Excuse me, but your website's source code appears to be showing


Re: Hah

That, and can you seriously imagine your JavaScript based Millennial web developer learning C++?

I hope not, do you know how much a C++ contractor can demand these days. In a couple of years I'll only need to work 1 day a week.

Apple cops to iPhone 8 production oops, offers to fix borked phones


iPhone 8 Plus

It took four visits to the Apple Genius Bar to get my iPhone 8 Plus replaced when it had exactly this issue at the start of this year.

No need to code your webpage yourself, says Microsoft – draw it and our AI will do the rest


Under the covers

It is using Emacs, or VI? (Tabs or spaces?)

Don't let Google dox me on Lumen Database, nameless man begs


Re: Is ABC...?

He's really "Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells", isn't he?

That'll be "Royal Tunbridge Wells" if you please.

Abracadabra! Tales of unexpected sysadmagic and dabbling in dark arts


Needed a jolly

In a former life, many a time bringing an ailing PC or printer back to base would remove all trace of the reported issue. The thing just needed a day out of the office.

Similarly, temporary HD fixes for worn out bearings could be achieved by putting the HD in the freezer for a few hours. They'd run long enough afterwards to copy off the data to a new HD.

Teardown chaps strip away magic from Magic Leap's nerd goggles


Feature Comparison Table

I'm not a VR connoisseur by any means, but I've yet to see a side by side feature comparison of the Magic Leap One with the other [leading] units on the market?

If this unit is as poor as reporters would have us believe, then a few facts and stats would be helpful to illustrate this conclusion.

Security MadLibs: Your IoT electrical outlet can now pwn your smart TV


So long Grandma, thanks for all the fish

1. Overload the switch.

2. Trip the GFCI on the main distribution panel.

3*. Powers down the automatic defibrillator, and the WiFi connected panic switch.

4. Anyone want Grandmas cat?

5. Donations to the RSPCA please.

* At this point you could switch the movie script to mix alien and human DNA to create whomsowhatever.

Apple tipped to revive forgotten Macbook Air and Mac mini – report


I love my Mac Mini

1. It's my home server,

2. It captures video from my home security cameras

3. I can Remote Desktop into it

4. It sits nicely hidden away in my networking cabinet - behind the towels, the sheets and the 2 bumper packs of toilet rolls :)

I would love a new one though. Faster (i7), more RAM (32GB), 2TB+ HD. One HDMI port, and a handful of Thunderbolt / USB C would do it.

(Plus I can use one for Windows and get rid of my wife's desk space consuming Dell tower too.)

US voting systems: Full of holes, loaded with pop music, and 'hacked' by an 11-year-old


1.21 Gigawatts

Did Emmett arrive in a DeLorean, and was he wearing clothes from around the 1930's?

Supermicro breathes in, shimmies a PB of Intel flash into one rack unit


As exciting as this is

Is it economically sensible to actually buy these compared to, say, four 256TB units and then spend the purchasing dollars saved on renting extra datacenter floorspace/power/cooling?

I'm sure in time they'll become economically viable, but is that 6 months from now, or 2 years?

I'm not a datacenter purchasing, commissioning or operations engineer (I write code), just curious to understand the economics here.

Boffins build a NAZI AI – wait, let's check that... OK, it's a grammar nazi


Re: "... misplaced apostrophe's, ..."

I see what you did there and in other places. Are you also a grocer?

Granville, fetch a cloth.

(Mine's the shopkeepers coat)

Shock Land Rover Discovery: Sellers could meddle with connected cars if not unbound


Re: As long as they're still using Lucas...

Land Rover: Inventors of the self-releasing seatbelt.

That's in preparation for your hasty exit as flames start to lick around the edges of the bonnet.

What a flap: SIM swiped from slain stork's GPS tracker used to rack up $2,700 phone bill


Want to chat with a Stork

Dial 100 and ask to speak to Buzby.

Hipster horror! Slack has gone TITSUP: Total inability to support user procrastination


We're out of Post-It notes

and screen wipes.

Guess we wouldn't of found out about either of these if Slack had not been offline.

UK footie fans furious as Sky Broadband goes TITSUP: Total inability to stream unfair penalties


Re: BT was fine all weekend

I think he's wanting them to move the tree.

Developer’s code worked, but not in the right century


Lars & the future interview

Do I, or do I not, now give date related coding questions to any interviewee named Lars?

Windows Server 2008 SP2 gets new support model



@Simon - where did you see information stating the end date was being moved out. I only see a change in the update model. I do not see any mention of the new model being continued past the already announced Jan 14 2020 end date.

GNOMEs beat Microsoft: Git Virtual File System to get a new name



Plagiarized Virtual File System

Microsoft partners to fling out collabo-visual Ginormonitors this year


Is it bigger. . .

. . . than a London double decker bus?

Mailshot meltdown as Wessex Water gets sweary about a poor chap called Tom


He's a Top Worker At Tea?

Microsoft commits: We're buying GitHub for $7.5 beeeeeeellion


End of SourceDepot?


Smart bulbs turn dumb: Lights out for Philips as Hue API goes dark


Perhaps a bit off topic, but why smart light bulbs instead of smart light fixtures that work with any old bulb? Not that either seems to me to have all that much utility.

Good idea mostly, except it's more work to take them with you when you move, and they're not readily installable by the average homeowner.

I'd trust my mother to install a light bulb without electrocuting herself, but less so to change a light fitting.


We can't really think of any good reasons why remote control of Hue lights would be useful.

It's really useful if you have a long overgrown pathway to your house, and you're coming home late. Turning on the outside lights so you can see the nefarious rascal about to jump you and make off with the remains of your kebab.

Why they never realize that they can make off with your very expensive Hue lights instead is beyond me.

A Reg-reading techie, a high street bank, some iffy production code – and a financial crash



for each byte in largeDataPacket. // megabytes


UpdateStatusBarOnScreen() // takes a millisecond or two

SendByteToDevice() // takes microseconds


The result was that sending the entire packet took about 30 minutes to progress a status bar a few hundred pixels across the screen, and only about 10 seconds to actually send all the data to the device.

Tufts boffins track device location without GPS or towers


Re: "Offloading positioning to the devices makes it . . ."

"Although it's actually more likely that people use this mechanism to crash drones."

That'll be Die Hard 2 then.

EmDrive? More like BS drive: Physics-defying space engine flunks out


180 degrees of separation?

If you had two engines coupled in opposition across a pressure sensor, and measured the force on that sensor, would that eliminate the effect of any force exerted externally on the apparatus as a whole?

(Asking for a friend)

Sysadmin hailed as hero for deleting data from the wrong disk drive


"I assumed that a proper workbench had a sacrificial layer"

My whole workbench cost only $99 (homedepot.com, with free delivery in the U.S.). The whole workbench is sacrificial at that price.

LESTER looks up, spins its wheels: The Register’s beer-butler can see ...



As the register seems intent on avoiding a beer carrying back pack for the humble golden retriever, which is also very adept at following balls, might I suggest that the final chassis of LESTER bears a significant resemblance to a certain robotic assistant of Dr. Who.

Plus K9 did have a LASER in his nose, and you can never have enough LASERs, can you?

Take-off crash 'n' burn didn't kill the Concorde, it was just too bloody expensive to maintain


Re: Wasnt just running costs...

I've always believed that Concorde's demise was due to the lack of any Air Force having anything they could deploy quick enough to bring down a hijacked Concorde at Mach 2.

Intel's security light bulb moment: Chips to recruit GPUs to scan memory for software nasties


[C|G|F|S]PU Silicon shuffle

"Hey Boss, we've got a batch of these quad core CPU's but half of the integrated GPU's have failed testing."

"Can they still access all the memory and run pattern matching?"


"Great, then we're going to call them Security Processing Units, add yet another $100 to the unit price and ship all that silicon anyways."

You must be yolking: English pub to launch eggstravagent Yorkshire pudding


Chicken creme egg kiev

Stuff the fondant in the middle of the chicken, and then dip it into a big saucepan of molten chocolate.

Bonus points for putting a long lollipop like stick in it.

DVLA denies driving licence processing site is a security 'car crash'


theregister.co.uk gets an F at securityheaders.io

stones, glass houses et al.

You're decorating it wrong: Apple HomePod gives wood ring of death


Titter ye not...

Apple's HomePod's bottoms ring leaves a white mark on your wood?

Frankie Howerd is turning in his grave.

Who's using 2FA? Sweet FA. Less than 10% of Gmail users enable two-factor authentication


!A == B

82 per cent correctly selected less than 10 per cent. The rest picked more than 10 per cent.

Funny that, out of a choice of only A or B, all those that did not pick A, picked B.

Apple sprays down bug-ridden iOS 11 with more fixes


11.2 screws up camera focus w/ some magnetic latch cases


Hold off on that upgrade. I'm one of the unfortunate few who are seeing this problem.


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