* Posts by Stumpy

237 posts • joined 20 May 2010

Page:

Can't get pranked by your team if nobody in the world can log on

Stumpy

Re: Rotate the monitor

Another favourite we used to use was to take the back of the CRT, rotate the vertical scan coil through 108 degrees and reassemble. Then leave the monitor upside down on top of the PC.

The amount of confusion and head scratching that used to cause was an awesome sight to behold.

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RIP Paul Allen: Microsoft cofounder billionaire dies at 65 after facing third bout with cancer

Stumpy

Plus, Knighthoods cease upon death, so Mr Allen cannot be knighted.

8
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Microsoft deletes deleterious file deletion bug from Windows 10 October 2018 Update

Stumpy

Re: An untested fix to an untested feature

"Move fast and break things" ....

.... isn't that the Facebook Agile mantra?

23
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And in current affairs: Rogue raccoon blacks out city power grid after shocking misstep

Stumpy

Re: Are you SURE it's dead?

JLV Wrote:

They look cute, but getting bitten by one means rabies shots and the ones most seen by tourists in Stanley Park are right next to a cliff where people have died falling.

'Falling' ... or were they pushed by little rodenty hands?

3
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Security guard cost bank millions by hitting emergency Off button

Stumpy

Re: Kim or Ken?

I think it's more the case that the security guard was aware that people were working in the machine room and thus should have consulted with them first. If the machine room was under normal BAU operation then yes, sure he would have done the right thing.

48
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Every bloody gadget in the house is ringing. Thanks, EE

Stumpy

Re: NEWS ROUND UP - JUNE 2020

I'll be round in 10. With a VERY large spoon!

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England's top judge lashes out at 'Science Museum' grade court IT

Stumpy

... I'll just leave this here ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VgwxKW0J6I

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Stumpy

Re: On the up-side

... but, but, but ... how could the lawyers, judges, et. al. 'work from home'? if that were the case, M'lud?

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PETA calls for fish friendly Swedish street signage

Stumpy

They're about as interested in animal rights as [insert topical comparison here].

... as Trump is interested in Demorcacy?

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Microsoft will ‘lose developers for a generation’ if it stuffs up GitHub, says future CEO

Stumpy

Re: Coming soon to github

... aaaannd .... CLIPPY!

"Hi there, it looks like you're writing a program. Would you like some help with that?"

(bugger, we really need a clippy icon)

15
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Microsoft commits: We're buying GitHub for $7.5 beeeeeeellion

Stumpy
Thumb Down

Re: Shite

"Wonder which new and exciting way they're gonna fuck it up."

Well, first they'll swap Git for SourceSafe ....

5
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A Reg-reading techie, a high street bank, some iffy production code – and a financial crash

Stumpy

Can I Just Point Out ...

... in everyone's critique of the code, you all seem to be making the assumption that the value for total_exposure is going to be displayed or visible in some manner to users.

What if the only purpose of tracking the value is to compare against some threshold value and display an alert / send a notification / ring an alarm or some-such? Then that would explain why it managed to sail under the radar for so long.

Making sweeping assumptions on usage, without seeing the full context makes you almost as bad as the original coder.

19
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Boffins: Michael Jackson's tilt was a criminally smooth trick

Stumpy
Joke

Korev wrote:

I don't know, I'm still trying to get Diana clean, she's so dirty

Yes, the French authorities really need to clean out their road tunnels...

... what? too soon?

7
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Military brainboxes ponder 'UK needs you' list of AI boffins

Stumpy

Re: amanfromMars is writing MoD press releases now?

BINGO!

10
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Make masses carry their mobes, suggests wig in not-at-all-creepy speech

Stumpy

Or more likely those of nefarious means will simply stash their smartmobe somewhere on a train, or taped under the wheelarch of a taxi or some such, then get a simple burner phone under a fake ID that can be destroyed after the fact.

Instant alibi: 'It can't have been me guv. Look, I woz on the Eurostar to Amsterdam at the time of the alleged offence'

50
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Boffins find new ways to slurp private info from Facebook addicts using precision-targeted ads

Stumpy

Re: missing the point?

... no, it's the right to arm bears. After all, gotta give them a sporting chance against the Huntin' Fishin' Shootin' brigade...

6
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Boffins pull off quantum leap in true random number generation

Stumpy

I always thought that the generator used for ERNIE (the Premium Bonds picker) was supposed to be completely random.

It might have changed in the years since I was up at National Savings, but the generator I saw relied on two metal discs with a pattern of holes drilled in them. These rotated in opposite directions and were stored up at a high potential difference. The time taken for a spark to jump the gap between them was used as a timing signal for a random seed generator (or something along those lines).

0
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The Register Opera Company presents: The Pirates of Penzance, Sysadmin edition

Stumpy

Re: Ooh, tempting

Mary had a little lamb,

She also had a duck,

She put them in a cardboard box,

To see if they would ... get along well together.

32
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Exploit kit development has gone to sh$t... ever since Adobe Flash was kicked to the curb

Stumpy

The Flash suite is over 20 years old and slated for retirement at 2020 at the latest. ®

Retirement? It should have been taken out back and shot years ago.

22
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Another day, another meeting, another £191bn down the pan

Stumpy

Reminds me of my days in EDS where we'd have to have a pre-meeting meeting meeting to discuss the agenda for the meeting to discuss the agenda for the meeting to figure out the agenda for some workshop or other....

18
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Fancy owning a two-seat Second World War Messerschmitt fighter?

Stumpy

Re: Seems a bit cheap

True, but this is just the asking price at Auction. I'd be really interested in seeing how much it actually sells for.

5
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Boffins: If AI eggheads could go ahead and try to stop their code being evil, that'd be great

Stumpy

Re: phishing mails

As a race, yes. Just look at how many people still read the Daily Mail to see how dumb we are.

10
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Kentucky gov: Violent video games, not guns, to blame for Florida school massacre

Stumpy

It's odd...

... but I've been playing video games (both violent and non-violent) frequently since sometime around 1982 - in fact you could say I spend most of my free time doing so, and not once have I had the urge to either:

(a) Go out and massacre kids at school

(b) Go out and massacre people in the street

(c) Go set fire to some great public building

(d) Go wield a baseball bat at other users on the road

... or any one of countless violent things I could get up to.

Odd that isn't it, if games are to blame for the problems?

0
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IBM: About those agreed voluntary redundancies ... we were just kidding

Stumpy

Re: So many shores.....

Surely though, in the case of the IBMers this time it should be Un-Shore?

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Stumpy

If you can keep a straight face, the facilitator (generally a well meaning but totally unqualified moron), can be driven mad

... ah, you mean they're generally someone from HR?

5
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Well done, UK.gov. You hit superfast broadband target (by handing almost the entire project to BT)

Stumpy

BT told me that the maximum I could ever get from my line would be a platry 6Mbs, so when we finally got Hyperoptic to install in the block it was a welcome relief (although took me nearly three years of lobbying the tenant management board and the other residents).

Now, I'm paying around £30/month for 100Mbs synchronous (FTTP) with phone, and regularly get faster than that (around 120Mbs).

Odd though that when I called BT to have the line disconnected and they asked me why, they then stated that they could offer me 'superfast' 50Mb broadband with BTTV thrown in ... although they still couldn't compete on price. Also, when I asked them what had changed recently to enable the uptick from 6Mb max to 50Mb max they told me that there had been no recent engineering work. Go figure. Lying sacks of s**t.

5
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Ex-staffer sues UK's DWP, claims superior blabbed confidential medical info

Stumpy

Re: rigorous process

Nope. the process is flimsy as f*ck, but there's rigour in there somewhere...

9
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Ever wondered why tech products fail so frequently? No, me neither

Stumpy

Re: Software testing?

I presume he means the Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice:

https://wiki.lspace.org/mediawiki/Sam_Vimes_Theory_of_Economic_Injustice

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Stop us if you've heard this one: Apple's password protection in macOS can be thwarted

Stumpy

Re: So how does one lock a Mac when stepping away?

Genuine question.

There's no GUI element for it, so if it is possible there must be some secret keyboard salute known only to the True Faithful.

... or you can use hot corners - I have mine set up so I just park the mouse pointer in the lower right hand corner for a couple of seconds

6
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Beer hall putz: Regulator slaps northern pub over Nazi-themed ad

Stumpy

Let's see - leopard skin shoes and leather trousers? A dress reported to have cost £56K. The State has strange tastes.

... and that's just Philip Hammond

27
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We translated Intel's crap attempt to spin its way out of CPU security bug PR nightmare

Stumpy

Re: Gamers largely unaffected by KPTI?

Once the connection to the framebuffer has been established, I'm pretty certain that the game then just talks directly to the video card so likely no Kernel transitions needed at all after the initialisation. Possibly, if the game needs to tear down the connection and re-init the display (eg: if graphics mode has been reset, or if new shaders need to be compiled) .. but generally these chores are done during setup and then left alone during gameplay.

9
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How fast is a piece of string? Boffin shoots ADSL signal down twine

Stumpy

The irony here being that 3.5Mb/s is still faster than some domestic broadband here in Britain...

126
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Donald, YOU'RE FIRED: Rogue Twitter worker quits, deletes President Trump's account

Stumpy

Does this mean Twitter could cause the end of the world as we know it?

There are some that think this may already have happened (or started, at least).

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Atto, boy! Eggheads fire laser for 43 attoseconds, fastest Man-made spurt

Stumpy

Re: I'm thinking...

That might be a little strange though

9
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We talk to Tron artist Syd Mead: On the other side of the screen, it all looks so easy

Stumpy

Re: Pong was not the first commercial video game...

IIRC, Computer Space was itself not actually the first Video Game (may have been the first commercial one), but was itself a version of 'Spacewar' which was built at MIT.

However, the American Physical Society does have a page up claiming that a version of Pong was itself the first actual video game back in 1958 ... so who knows ????

https://www.aps.org/publications/apsnews/200810/physicshistory.cfm

https://www.jesperjuul.net/thesis/2-historyofthecomputergame.html

4
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Software update turned my display and mouse upside-down, says user

Stumpy

This reminds me of a trick we used to play on folks back in a previous life/career cycle.

We'd remove the back of the old CRT monitors and rotate the deflection coils on the neck of the tube by 180 degrees before reassembling. We'd then turn the screen upside down on top of the user's PC.

Cue much hilarity when the user would arrive at their desk, turn the screen the right way up then boot their PC and wonder why the display was upside down :)

4
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Microsoft reveals details of flagship London store within spitting distance from Apple's

Stumpy

I wonder if they'll be shipping in authentic tumbleweed to roll down the aisles?

5
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Stand up who HASN'T been hit in the Equifax mega-hack – whoa, whoa, sit down everyone

Stumpy

Frankly, it should be illegal for any company that has suffered a breach to offer protection and remediation services to its caffected clients itself. It should always be a trusted third party, as should the investigation into the breach iteself also.

Talk about marking your own homework....

5
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Unable to give up on life on Mars, bio-boffins now thrilled to find boron

Stumpy

Am I the only one who read the headline as

Unable to give up on life on Mars, bio-boffins now thrilled to find bacon

1
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70% of Windows 10 users are totally happy with our big telemetry slurp, beams Microsoft

Stumpy

Re: I did it another way...

+1 for a share.

2
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Trump as US president (in Sharknado 3)? Oh Hell No!

Stumpy

Ah, just think though. If he had been in it, it would have been the BIGGEST and BEST crap film franchise EVER. He'd have been making Sharknado GREAT again.!!!

biggly.

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Ofcom: Blighty has devolved into a nation of unwashed binge-streaming mole people

Stumpy

Re: Newsflash @Richard 81

Mmmmm ... evil Willow .... hrrrrrrr....

12
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Arcade Fire releases album on USB fidget spinner for £79/$105

Stumpy

Re: RPM??

78 dear boy, 78.

11
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Facebook may print money but thirsty Wall Street wants more

Stumpy

Re: All that lovely advertising lucre

That's where the likes of Ghostery, AdBlock Plus and Privacy Badger come to the fore. No profiling and tracking cookies allowed, unless I specifically allow them.

17
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Juicy fine for Bradford firm after it blurts one million spam texts

Stumpy

Minimum fine should be at least £1 per text message or email sent in these cases. That'll soon deter the buggers.

3
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Jodie Who-ttaker? The Doctor is in

Stumpy

Sorry, but ...

There are only two Doctors of note ... Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker. All others pale into insignificance.

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Don't panic, but your Bitcoins may just vanish into the ether next month

Stumpy

Re: An alternative

... or you could use a triangular rubber coin approximately six thousand miles along each side.

43
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So. A cross-Europe cyberwar simulation. Of ransomware

Stumpy

You should, because what if they could cause it to set alight? Or what if they'd got control of _all_ the toasters, and fridges, etc. and used them to surge the power grid?

1
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London suffers from 'sub-standard' connectivity - report

Stumpy

Vaizey may have a point ...

... when he states that only 1/3 of people elect to take up fast broadband.

I tried for years to get FTTP since BT Fibre wasn't available (then, is now) and Sky ... well, not going there.

I eventually managed to get the interest of Hyperoptic, but they wouldn't cable the building until there was enough interest from residents, so I started to canvass all the residents and the block management to try to get a groundswell of interest.

Let's just say that it's taken me three years and a shitload of effort on my part to get it installed, and as far as I know, I'm the only one in the entire block that's taken up the service. Everyone else is either with Sky or BT Infinity, and that's more than good enough for them (mean speeds here on infinity are around 20MBS on a good day).

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