* Posts by Alister

3335 posts • joined 19 May 2010

Microsoft drops Office 365 for biz. Now it's just Microsoft 365. Word

Alister Silver badge

So does this mean that Windows 10 will become a subscription based offering?

His Muskiness wheels out the Tesla Model 3

Alister Silver badge

or you're happy to leave the car charging in your drive.

Or, for thousands and thousands of households in the UK, on the public street.

Former GCHQ boss backs end-to-end encryption

Alister Silver badge

Ooh he's done it now, not singing from the same hymn-sheet as the PM is not good for your personal advancement prospects.

I wonder if he likes wearing handcuffs whilst lying in a suitcase in the bath?

Trump backs off idea for joint US/Russian 'impenetrable Cyber Security unit'

Alister Silver badge

Re: There's no such thing as a "cyber" cease fire

Rumours, what rumours?

Alister Silver badge


FINALLY there's someone in the White House that understands the process of foreign policy when it comes to making agreements.

Trump hasn't the first clue how to manage foreign policy, he treats it like a business deal, just as he does everything else.

People like ME voted for Trump. Happy?

Not happy, just sympathise deeply, and hope you get some help soon.

Alister Silver badge

Re: Its all pretty obvious

Another one who's still living in the eighties.

FYI, There is no USSR anymore.

Alister Silver badge

Re: There's no such thing as a "cyber" cease fire

I would quite like the opportunity to be able to commit to quit having sex with Scarlett Johannson.

On the couch with an AI robo-doc asking me personal questions

Alister Silver badge

Re: Shrinks are useless or crazy


neatly folded clothes as a pillow,

Alister Silver badge

I'm not sure if this says more about me than I would like, but I reckon the image at the head of this article still bears a passing resemblance to Dabbsy...

Virgin Media biz service goes TITSUP* across London

Alister Silver badge

right! own up!

Who was driving the JCB?

Banking app startups go TITSUP as payment slurper keels over. Again

Alister Silver badge

Re: So a bunch of companies I've never heard of have built UI's to another companies API

Yes, best left to Co-Op, or maybe RBS, or how about HSBC,nope lets try Tesco's...Got it NatWest...Bank of Melbourne? No lets try JP Morgan....Lloyds? Chase? Anyone?

Or instead, how about companies that actually do transaction processing, like Verifone, Ingenico, SagePay or Allpay?

It's very rare that they break.

Alister Silver badge

The reason for the outage is obvious - you can't set up a company and take over a well established acronym from another field, and expect it to work reliably.

The mobile apps are obviously completely confused as to which GPS they should be using to make payments to.

Just you wait until someone makes a payment of £10.52 and all the SatNavs jump ten miles east...

While USA is distracted by its President's antics, China is busy breaking another fusion record

Alister Silver badge

Re: At that temp, marshmallows will melt!

'merkins are on a involution process, soon they will loose control of their thumbs, and will go back to climbing trees and growing fur.

Maybe they'll regress to spelling lose correctly - one can but hope.

Nothing could protect Durex peddler from NotPetya ransomware

Alister Silver badge

It is still not clear to me by what mechanism the NotPetya was spread.

For a number of victims, it was widely reported to be an infected update of the MeDoc financial software, but I struggle to understand why Reckitt Benckiser, Fed Ex, Maersk, WPP etc would be running that software.

TfL, WTH is my bus? London, UK, looks up from its mobile

Alister Silver badge

Re: There, there children. Sorry your pacifier is b0rken.

Well, knowing the approximate time when the bus arrives would aid making the critical decision whether it would be better to, perhaps, walk.

Once upon a time, there used to be pieces of paper, called timetables, which could unerringly tell you the approximate time a bus was due to arrive at a particular stop. These were a miracle of modern technology, requiring no power source, and no WiFi or phone signal.

For all the chaos it sows, fewer than 1% of threats are actually ransomware

Alister Silver badge

Re: fewer than 1%

fewer than 1% is zero

Umm no... no it's not. 0.5% is less than 1%, as are 0.9%, 0.8%, 0.7%...

where are the grammar police when you need them?

Right here.


Bonkers call to boycott Raspberry Pi Foundation over 'gay agenda'

Alister Silver badge

Re: Wow!

How gay does that make TV Kids favourite 'Rainbow', then?

You'd have to ask Geoffrey and Bungle about that, I wouldn't know...

Alister Silver badge

Thank the gods they don't ship the Pi in a triangular pink box, eh?

Happy 4th of July: Norks tests another missile

Alister Silver badge

Re: Mandatory Reading

Also its fairly obvious that " political and economic institutions" have an effect on economic success (or lack of it)

Very true.

Although, thinking about it, a non man made tsunami , famine , hurricane or earthquake could also have a significant negative effect on the lack of economic success of a nation , just as finding a shitload of non man made crude oil can have a very positive effect .

Not sure you can really class a tsunami, hurricane or oil deposit as an "institution" though?

Alister Silver badge

Re: Mandatory Reading

"Daron Acemoglu and James Robinson conclusively show that it is man-made political and economic institutions that underlie economic success (or lack of it). "

Isn't this a bit "No Shit Sherlock"?

As far as I know there are no political and economic institutions which are not man made - politics and economics are abstract constructs of human brains, not entities that exist in reality.

Why, Robot? Understanding AI ethics

Alister Silver badge

Not many people know that Isaac Asimov didn’t originally write his three laws of robotics for I, Robot. They actually first appeared in "Runaround", the 1942 short story


As "I Robot" was the title of an anthology of existing stories, rather than it containing any new material, I would have thought it was obvious that Asimov didn’t originally write his three laws of robotics for I, Robot.

Therefore "Not many people know" is bollocks, really.

One thought equivalent to less than a single proton in mass

Alister Silver badge

The Register wonders how many Katie Hopkins columns it would take to amass a single unit?

More than she could ever write before the heat-death of the universe...

NASA: Bring on the asteroid, so we can chuck a fridge at it

Alister Silver badge

Re: Bah!

The response of the enraged Clangers to this unprovoked attack will be swift, decisive and permanent.

Well... it depends what's in the fridge...

They might regard it as a most welcome food parcel, after years, and years, and years of bloody soup!

Alister Silver badge

Re: 'a non-threatening small asteroid'

Prof. Timothy Fielding: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Can I put this into some sort of perspective? When I caught Gerald in '68 he was completely wild.

Gerald, the Gorilla: Wild? I was absolutely livid!

Blighty's Department for Culture, Media & Sport gets 'digital' rebrand

Alister Silver badge

So... how's that digital culture working out then?

And the digital sport? is that any good?

Shock: NASA denies secret child sex slave cannibal colony on Mars

Alister Silver badge

Important clarification

But this hack will eat his hat if they find any evidence of interplanetary sex slaves having their organs harvested.

I would just like to confirm, Ian, that you do actually own a hat?

Tick-tick... boom: Germany gives social media giants 24 hours to tear down hate speech

Alister Silver badge

Re: "no one should be above the law"

accept Hillary Clinton

I will never accept Hilary Clinton.

I would probably except her though.

Robots will enable a sustainable grey economy

Alister Silver badge

a generation who inhabit a world where work is almost never backbreaking drudgery and almost always meaningful

Are all the dustbin men (and women), shelf stackers, cleaners, construction workers, care assistants etc from a different generation? is working in a fast food restaurant a "meaningful" experience?

Alister Silver badge

Re: How can a car-based future be long term sustainable?

Though you still have other options, like living somewhere better-suited to your needs

Ah, so anyone who needs to shop regularly shouldn't live in a rural area, is that what you are saying?

Alister Silver badge

Re: How can a car-based future be long term sustainable?

but shipping around a 100kg person in a 2000kg car every day just to go to work or to buy stuff is idiotic. That's a problem decent public transport can solve cheaper and better

My nearest bus stop is a mile away. My nearest supermarket is 20 miles away. Even if there were regular buses (and not the two a day during the week that we have now) explain to me how I should do my weekly shopping without a car.

Did you know? Today is International Asteroid Day! Wouldn't it be amazing if one were to...

Alister Silver badge

Brian Cox, Brian May, Peter Gabriel and Chris Hadfield.

Definitely the potential for an awesome band here, is "The Astroboffins" a good name?

US Senators want Kaspersky shut out of military contracts

Alister Silver badge


Bring back Joe McCarthy, all is forgiven!

Alister Silver badge


Unless you are asking a question in French, I think you mean Cue.

Modern Micron maestro Mehrotra marches merrily, maintains megahit masterplan

Alister Silver badge

Re: My my!

Agreed, an absolutely awesome assemblage of alliterative adjectives.

Virus (cough, cough, Petya) goes postal at FedEx, shares halted

Alister Silver badge

Am I right in thinking FedEx got hit by the original WannaCry as well?

Hot news! Combustible Galaxy Note 7 to return as 'Galaxy Note FE'

Alister Silver badge

What could FE stand for?

Perhaps it's built of iron?

HMS Windows XP: Britain's newest warship running Swiss Cheese OS

Alister Silver badge

I believe so, and it's based on Windows Embedded Standard 2009, which is still supported by Microsoft, and is a lot less susceptible to the attack vectors XP is famed for.

Researchers blind autonomous cars by tricking LIDAR

Alister Silver badge

Re: One day the goverment will update this crap

This was relevant when we were driving Austin Allegros and Morris Minors, it's like those 50 MPH bends on motorways*. It's time they were updated.

55metres at 60mph is the distance calculated to be safe for the broad range of vehicles on the road.

Yes, you could probably reduce it for modern cars with vented disks and low-profile tyres, in perfect mechanical order, but there's still an awful lot of vehicles on the roads which will not be able to stop in that distance, so a safe margin based on an average is better.

I would be prepared to bet that well over 50% of private cars on Britain's roads at this moment have one or more defects which will have a detrimental effect on their stopping distance, whether that be worn tyres, under-inflated tyres, worn or loose suspension bushes, faulty shock-absorbers, worn brake pads, etc, etc.

Very few car owners today do any maintenance on their cars, and most only fix things when they fail the MOT.

Alister Silver badge

Re: Nothing new here...

I love the way "old" technology (in a different form) is always seen as "new" within the automotive sector

So... reinventing the wheel, then?

Google hit with record antitrust fine of €2.4bn by Europe

Alister Silver badge

Re: Erm

Google doesn't owe anyone anything, it's up to the consumer to make a choice as to whether to use Google's search engine or not.

Indeed for all users of Microsoft Windows, if they use Google it is because they have changed the default search engine available to them, and must therefore be by choice.

Alister Silver badge

The commission has been accused of disproportionately targeting US tech companies. Since 2000, European regulators have investigated Microsoft, Intel, Apple, Google, Facebook and Amazon.

Well, as most of the larger internet companies are US based, that's hardly surprising.

Working in maintenance? Stop reading, we need you in the server room

Alister Silver badge

Have one of these --------->

Sounds like you need it...

Alister Silver badge

Could this be that fewer and fewer companies, in any sphere, consider maintenance to be anything other than a cost centre. It seems that corporate culture nowadays is not to carry out maintenance, but simply repair or replace things when they break.

It appears to be impossible to instil the idea that regular maintenance will prolong the life of machinery, computers, roads or railways, and therefore will reduce costs long term.

UK's Ministry of Fun considers what to tell social media firms about online bullying

Alister Silver badge

Re: Get the popcorn

Same way as here: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/06/27/telegram_warned_by_russian_regulator_roskomnadzor/

Umm, but isn't that a Russian company, being warned by the Russian government?

AFAIK the UK regulator, like the Russian regulator, has no binding power over companies based outside their respective countries.

Tremble in fear, America, as Daesh-bags scrawl cyber-graffiti on .gov webpages no one visits

Alister Silver badge

Absolutely, and the fact that said wankers destroyed an historic Mosque just proves what devout Muslims they really are.

Games rights-holders tell ZX Spectrum reboot firm: Pay or we pull titles

Alister Silver badge

“We are not making any comment to The Register”

Did you pick his dummy up for him?

Blighty's first aircraft carrier in six years is set to take to the seas

Alister Silver badge

Re: May be a silly question

Damn you, earworm alert!

duuum! duh-duh-duh-dum,duh-duh-duh-dum, dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum.

Alister Silver badge

Maybe Easton Gibb & Son should have built Rosyth Dockyard below the bridges, as well


WannaCrypt blamed for speed camera reboot frenzy in Australia

Alister Silver badge


Yes, but that's your choice, not a requirement. and as CrazyOldCatMan says it would be highly unusual to run Linux on top of a Windows hypervisor on any piece of equipment like a speed camera.

Besides, if you consider how she phrased it, it would seem to suggest she believes that the Windows operating system is an integral part of Linux:

Even the Linox (sic) system still uses a Windows operating system underneath it.

SpaceX nails two launches and barge landings in one weekend

Alister Silver badge

Re: "Watched the BulgariaSat launch live,"

I wondered how many Bulgaria's are on board. *

I wondered how many airbags it had... :)

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019