* Posts by chivo243

2646 posts • joined 10 May 2010

BOFH: We know where the bodies are buried

chivo243
Silver badge

yes, knowing where the bodies are

*cough* ahem, what bodies...

3
0

Millions of scraped public social net profiles left in open AWS S3 box

chivo243
Silver badge
Devil

S3?

Selfservice 3... to all that yummy data. Can't wait for the online DB to check if my name is somehow present?

1
0

You're a govt official. You accidentally slap personal info on the web. Quick, blame a kid!

chivo243
Silver badge
Facepalm

Woo woo, chug chug

Why do I feel like this kid will be railroaded in this one?

I was once kicked out of a bar for taking a free promotional poster for the band that was playing that night.

5
0

It's US Tax Day, so of course the IRS's servers have taken a swan dive

chivo243
Silver badge

59% obsolete

W2K3?

LOL

0
1

More than 87m Facebook profiles farmed, says second ex-Cambridge Analytica witness

chivo243
Silver badge
Trollface

Wow

the news just keeps getting

2
0

Facebook admits it does track non-users, for their own good

chivo243
Silver badge
Trollface

Re: It just occured to me that ...

Our good friend Hari the Helicon twister... I'd like to see zuck try to duck a Helicon twist!

1
0
chivo243
Silver badge
Flame

Dear Mark

Please shut down your thing. Not only is it ruining my marriage, the missus is on FB before her first cuppa, but now you're tracking me, who has never ever looked at your thing, or cares to see it. To quote Charlie Daniels "I'll relocate your nose to the other side of your head if you dont..." You're a rich fuck who never had a care in the world. Now you're even richer and stupider. Please do us all a favor turn it off, and go find a nice island where you can become a hermit.

signed,

a dissatisfied non-customer

29
2

UK pub chain Wetherspoons' last call: ♫ Just a spoonful of Twitter – let's pull social media down ♫

chivo243
Silver badge
Happy

@frank ly

As a chef (many years ago) I visited many of the competitors, often. Often with my meal being comp'd too!

7
0

Windows Admin Center: Vulture gets claws on browser-based server admin

chivo243
Silver badge

Re: "you open up a browser (must be Chrome or Edge)"

If you want full features, EDGE? No effin way!! I was kind of excited with the announcement of this option, but I'm not getting the warm and fuzzy feeling I was looking forward to... Thanks for finding the pain points El Reg!

As there are two paths, I will give the 2016 server path a try. Oh, wait, I will have to spin one of those up too!

5
1

The first rule of maths class: Don't start a fight club

chivo243
Silver badge
Holmes

wait a minute?

I thought the first rule was...

32
0

Best thing about a smart toilet? You can take your mobile in without polluting it

chivo243
Silver badge
Happy

"looking pug ugly" on the other side of the pond it's just fugly, no reason to bring innocent dogs into it...

11
0

Total WIPOut: IT chief finds his own job advertised

chivo243
Silver badge

Introductions in order?

Hi Mario, this is Francis, Francis this is Mario... You've both been baaaad boys.

Vipers all....

7
0

Penis pothole protester: Cambridge's 'Wanksy' art shows feted

chivo243
Silver badge
Facepalm

My best Basel, Beg your pardon?

“Every penny that we have to spend cleaning off this graffiti is a penny less that we have to spend on actually repairing the potholes.”

The cart ahead of the horse thinking...

3
0

Snubbed R Us: Microsoft eschews Vulture Consultants in Playmobil tech research

chivo243
Silver badge
Pint

So glad to see Lester's name back on El Reg! Has there been any thought to resurrecting the Post Pub Nosh? I thoroughly enjoyed it!

5
0

Fear the Reaper: Man hospitalised after eating red hot chilli pepper

chivo243
Silver badge

Tropical birds love them too... A friend once had an African Parrot, and he fed it dried hot peppers as a treat quite regularly.

0
0
chivo243
Silver badge
Windows

In my youth

I loved everything spicy. I couldn't get enough. Now in my mid to sunset years, I've come to appreciate aromatic hot flavors, not just HEAT, getting older is hell...

5
0

El Reg needs you – to help build an automated beer-transporting robot

chivo243
Silver badge
Pint

Re: Alternatively

Just like in Belgium? Where the beer lines go from the factory to the end consumer?

5
0

You. FCC. Get out there and do something about these mystery bogus cell towers, huff bigwigs

chivo243
Silver badge

control people, control

Since nobody is tracking the implementation of these towers... seems there's a fail some up the control line...

2
0

UK 'wife'-carrying champion named

chivo243
Silver badge
Mushroom

tins of baked beans or similar!

Estonian baked beans?

icon, no explanation needed...

1
0

*Thunk* No worries, the UPS should spin up. Oh cool, it's in bypass mode

chivo243
Silver badge

Re: a new site built directly on a flood plain

Now, that's future readiness!

4
0

1.5 BEEELLION sensitive files found exposed online dwarf Panama Papers leak

chivo243
Silver badge
FAIL

No exposed RDP?

Not even an honorable mention?

10
2

Spring is all about new beginnings, but it could already be lights out for Windows' Fluent Design

chivo243
Silver badge
Facepalm

That's how to make Pringles

"...transparency of Windows 7's Aero glass with the flat design of Windows 8 and 10 that have been updated to include elements of depth."

First we dehydrate potatoes, then we rehydrate them!

Or am I reading that wrong, they took away windows 7 depth(meh) and gave windows 10 depth?

this is all too deep for me...

4
1

Why a merged Apple OS is one mash-up too far

chivo243
Silver badge
Devil

Unified?

I mentioned a unified macOS and iOS a few years ago, and an Apple Dev I know laughed, and told me it would never happen. It was against the Jobs Law...

I wonder how he likes his crow prepared?

2
6

Wanna work for El Reg? Developers needed for headline-writing AI bots

chivo243
Silver badge

Better use

An SDN to keep the AI in his VLAN...

Why would anyone need a bot to write this stuff... Bottle maybe? I'm sure I'd could qualify.

1
0

Microsoft patches patch for Meltdown bug patch: Windows 7, Server 2008 rushed an emergency fix

chivo243
Silver badge
Trollface

I'll wait

for proper updates from the manufacturers. At least they tried it on one of their systems before shoveling it out the door...

5
1

User fired IT support company for a 'typo' that was actually a real word

chivo243
Silver badge

When the dust settles

This is part of the reward of knowing you are right, and the exploding\offending party has toilet paper on their shoe... Ya just gotta wait for it... Everybody will see it!

3
0
chivo243
Silver badge
Devil

Re: Haha!

@heyrick

"Doubles the price at the end. Brilliant!"

Maybe we'll see Simon pull this one soon?

1
0

Microsoft's Windows 7 Meltdown fixes from January, February made PCs MORE INSECURE

chivo243
Silver badge
Coat

Re: Why is this allowed?

@AC

Why is Microsoft allowed to sell a defective OS and distribute defective so called "security" updates?

Because one the Three Letter Club asked nicely? *cough* *NSA* *cough*

Now where's that tinfoil hat icon...

2
6

What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs

chivo243
Silver badge
Devil

Re: If we avoid US "English", will we be OK?

Hell, they even said Fuck on the new Star Trek Discovery or was it fuckin' cool?

4
0
chivo243
Silver badge

Re: Skype

@katrinab

You can host your own private node of Mastodon...

https://joinmastodon.org/#getting-started

Install your own

If you are interested in running your own instance — for your friends, family or organization — you can get started by reading the installation documentation. You only host your own users and the content that they subscribe to.

3
0
chivo243
Silver badge

Skype

I only use the text function of skype to communicate with the missus while I'm at work. Might look into my own chat server thing... I read about something called Mastodon last week, might be interesting.

5
0

FCC boss to block 'national security risk' companies (cough, Huawei, ZTE) from US's $8.5bn broadband pot

chivo243
Silver badge

levy vs levee

Not sure what the reference is here? Levys get thrown on a server. A server can be thrown onto a levee...

0
0

Students: Duh, of course we're blowing our loan bucks on crypto coins

chivo243
Silver badge

Re: Careful

@Jake?MS

Ask yourself this before investing: The money you plan to invest, can you afford to lose it? If you lost every penny would it effect you? This is the risk you take when investing.

I posted this a few weeks ago, seems even more appropriate for this article...

Kipling's advice to crypto miners~

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss

Now I have a Kingston Trio song stuck in my head too....

6
0

Fleeing Facebook app users realise what they agreed to in apps years ago – total slurpage

chivo243
Silver badge

Re: Where's my old Nokia?

Is that a Nokia C1? Love it!

0
0
chivo243
Silver badge

you're not a Facebook user, in which case you had no say in the matter

I'm not a fecesbook user, and I'll probably be pretty pissed the day I see what personal data of mine that they have.

I can't wait for the day when FB goes the way of geocities....

14
0

BOFH: Give me a lever long enough and a fool, I mean a fulcrum and ....

chivo243
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Stone soup contract

The extras keep on coming...

So, it seems that the "new boss" who bossplains, is not a target....

yet...

29
0

Zucker for history: What I learnt about Facebook 600 years ago

chivo243
Silver badge

Marshall McLuhan?

The medium is the massage?

4
0

User asked why CTRL-ALT-DEL restarted PC instead of opening apps

chivo243
Silver badge
Facepalm

Book on the keyboard

That's a facepalm I've seen a few times. One user was even a bit angry that I pointed it out! I guess nobody wants to look foolish...

15
0

El Reg deep dive: Everything you need to know about UK.gov's pr0n block

chivo243
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

sexual proclivities

What the hell, are we talking about Barbados Slim?

2
1

Five things you need to know about Microsoft's looming Windows 10 Spring Creators Update

chivo243
Silver badge
Coat

MS have your $

Rolled up really tight and stuck in their ears, they can't hear you. And wouldn't care if they could hear you...

7
3

Horn star Sudan, last male northern white rhino, dies aged 45

chivo243
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Genetic Diversity

Isn't it obvious... The Apple was spiked, and Eve thought everybody at the party was Adam...!

3
0
chivo243
Silver badge
Pint

We gents should be so lucky!

Only a bucket of semen remains...

8
1

He He He: Seagate's gasbag Exos spinner surges up to 14TB

chivo243
Silver badge
Coat

On helium?

Shouldn't it be Hiii Hiii Hii like a chipmunk?

2
0

AMD security flaw saga, browsers broken, Lamo dead at 37, and more

chivo243
Silver badge
Pint

Color me Purple

Holding my breathe until Flash is gone... 2 years!

4
0

UK mobe network Three's profits hit by IT upgrade costs

chivo243
Silver badge
Happy

Li Ka-shing

What a name for one of the richest guys in Asia ~ Kashing! Cashing it in. Priceless!

6
0

FYI: There's a cop tool called GrayKey that force unlocks iPhones. Let's hope it doesn't fall into the wrong hands!

chivo243
Silver badge
Holmes

@as2003

Apple will have one asap, via any means. And if this black box is built around one exploit, it might be worthless after the next iOS update?

2
1

Office junior had one job: Tearing perforated bits off tractor-feed dot matrix printer paper

chivo243
Silver badge
Devil

out of paper!

I guess he is lucky that they couldn't load the paper... I've been called out on printer issues, only to find the paper tray was empty, and the user had the gall to ask me to fill it for them! So, I filled it, and also left with the comment: "Let me know when your stapler is empty, I'll be by to fill that too!"

19
0

Patch LOSE-day: Microsoft secures servers of the world. By disconnecting them

chivo243
Silver badge
Flame

Fun day tomorrow?

Time will tell... looks like I'll be working early and late tomorrow.

8
0

Poop to save planet as boffins devise bullsh*t way of extracting gas

chivo243
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: the future is here

Welcome to Bartertown, little man...

Beat me to it, damn!

Icon speaks for itself ;-}

7
0

Crypto crackdown: Google bans ads for unregulated currencies

chivo243
Silver badge
Holmes

Kipling's advice to crypto miners

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss

15
0

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018