* Posts by BongoJoe

1139 posts • joined 3 Apr 2010

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UK ministers' Broadband '2.0' report confuses superfast with 10Mbps

BongoJoe
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Seriously though. Cost of HS2: £55Bn. Cost of wiring up the whole country to be proper actual FTTP: <£55Bn. Which one is more important?

Clearly HS2. Because with HS2 a small, but clearly important, number of high earning City types can then commute daily from the Yorkshire Dales to their London office.

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UK government's war on e-cigs is over

BongoJoe
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Re: Jesus, NO!

I accept your point but the problem is that we see today so many 'independent' studies that aren't.

We see reports saying that sugar isn't harmful, for example, and then we find out who has sponsored that study. I have lost count of independent studies that show us that various foods are good/bad and the same for medicines and behind them somewhere is someone is a vested interest.

Not all of them, of course, but far too many to not to take this, and anything else, on face value.

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Juicy fine for Bradford firm after it blurts one million spam texts

BongoJoe
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Er, why would I wish to borrow a fruit?

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User left unable to type passwords after 'tropical island stress therapy'

BongoJoe
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Re: the nub of the issue...

Nobody expects users to do their own diagnosis... just please be a little less unhelpful!

Normally, I would agree. And then I get the users who say "There was an error box popping up."

"What did it say?"

"I don't know. I just clicked on OK"

Which is a far cry from "The car pulls to the right" or "there is a noise over 50mph". Those users who just click on the error box may as well say "There's something wrong with the car but I am not going to tell you what."

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BongoJoe
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Re: Government staff: need I say more?

I got told off by the Head of IT at some site I was working in when an over earning lawyer came into the room asking "Is the internet down?"

I answered with "Yes, they're backing it up."

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Now here's a novel idea: Digitising Victorian-era stamp duty machines

BongoJoe
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I do remember living in Belgium, until about the turn of the century, that even posters on the street, advert cards in newsagents all had little stamps on them. It seems that there was one person's job in the post office to just handle these stamps.

I think that these transactions just about covered their salary.

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Hey, remember that monkey selfie copyright drama a few years ago? Get this – It's just hit the US appeals courts

BongoJoe
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Re: Devil's Advocate

Only if the cars trigger the camera. If, however, the cameras took a picture every second then the copyright would belong to the Dartford Tunnel people.

It could be interesting if this went further (and applied to the Right Side of the Pond) because this may mean that the pictures couldn't be sent between departments or different authorities.

Until the day, that is, that there's a small disclaimer written on a notice board saying something like "Use of this motorway is considered acceptance of our terms and conditions regarding copyright of your likeness."

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Microsoft hits Alt-F4 on 3,000 global sales staff

BongoJoe
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These boxes

I've never understood people who take stuff home in a box. A potted plant, for goodness' sake?

I would simply put what would fit into my pockets and then perhaps consider a small desktop fire for the rest.

Perhaps this may explain why when I was last 'let go' I was told just so over a beer in a remote pub.

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Brit prosecutors ask IT suppliers to fight over £3 USB cable tender

BongoJoe
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Re: Not just restricted to governments

My father, back in the sixties, once received a gas bill for £0. 0s 0d and, of course, ignored it.

A reminder letter followed and then a Final Demand. So, he rang up the office to ask how this could be sorted and he was told that the computer needs to see that a payment had been made, so would be kindly send a cheque for no pounds, no shilling and no pennies.

A few days later he received a letter saying that his account was up to date.

Then in the next post a letter from the bank arrived asking him what the hell he was playing at writing cheques for such an amount.

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BongoJoe
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Re: @Christian Berger, re: stupid bills.

So I bought a can of coke and bar of chocolate with it (which give you some idea of when that was!)

Some time ago, because today the Health & Safety would be onto you for buying such sugary items.

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Bonkers call to boycott Raspberry Pi Foundation over 'gay agenda'

BongoJoe
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Re: Rainbow

I used to have a Greenpeace t-shirt in the mid-seventies which certainly had a rainbow. And they had one too until the French got hold of it.

And there was certainly nothing gay about Messrs Blackmore, Powell & Dio back in '76.

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Virgin Media to close flagship Oxford St store in August

BongoJoe
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Thumb Up

Re: still sold records and CDs.

Double nostalgic upvote for 'penfriend'

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Fighter pilot shot down laptops with a flick of his copper-plated wrist

BongoJoe
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So just because you haven't seen it happen before, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

No magic, just plain natural science

Not sure of the downvotes. Perhaps those same people who don't know that some water companies in the UK actually employ dowsers.

My father could do it as it happens and he was a straight laced dyed in the wool non-airy-fairy exMod boffin with many an invention to his name.

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I still haven't found what I'm malloc()ing for: U2 tops poll of music today's devs code to

BongoJoe
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I've worked for three outfits which had punchcards which worked to deciHours, i.e. six minute intervals, that we had to fill in time sheets for.

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BongoJoe
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I have POWER WINDOWS on infinite loop. Nothing else.

Not sure what a 'mom' is but whomever this fabled being may be I can't see them recognising anything more modern than a C90 cassette with the tape wrapped around the player's rollers.

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What a tit! Uber CEO hijacks his staff breast-pump room to meditate

BongoJoe
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That, according to the adherents of Debrett's, would be one of the more heineous crimes possible.

Lip. Upper and stiff. If you please.

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Tech can do a lot, Prime Minister, but it can't save the NHS

BongoJoe
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Re: WTF!?

Without getting into arguments for and against replacing the nuclear deterrent fleet it is worth looking at the figures

One of the arguments that I have against Trident and the ilk is that since Russia and China are owning more and more of the UK where is the milage in them nuking their own property?

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Live blog: Fired FBI boss spills the beans to US Senate committee

BongoJoe
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One Mistake

The one mistake that Trump appears to have made is to request, or require if you will, that Comey pledges loyalty to the President.

Surely, both of these gentlemen should be loyal to the US Constitution and to no-one and to nothing else.

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Hyperloop One teases idea of 50-minute London-Edinburgh ride

BongoJoe
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Re: A luddite writes...

Yep, the point is to ride your motorcycle really fast on winding country roads.

You do realise that this is going to baffle quite a number of people. Country roads, hyperloops, motorcycles? What gives? etc...

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BongoJoe
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Re: A luddite writes...

<emWhat was that thing about the soul travelling at the speed of a trotting camel?</em>

The point of a journey is not to arrive.

- N. Peart

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BongoJoe
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Re: Something less drastic maybe

"Rather than a full national scheme why not build a short proper proof of concept route."

May I suggest Manchester to Sheffield as an alternative?

The rail system is hopeless and having to go over either Woodhead Pass or Snake Pass to get to the other city is a nighmare especially for the poor sods living in Mottram.

The M25 may be much maligned but it gets people from one to the other rather quickly and there's nothing between these two Northern cities that compare.

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BongoJoe
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Re: Whatever the technical merits/flaws

And then after the Llyn Celyn reservoir it was decided that it wasn't needed and was an awfully big mistake anyway.

One of the less brilliant decisions by the government, I have to say and, as it happens, I am about five minutes away from it sttting in a motorhome.

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Golden handshakes of almost half a million at Wikimedia Foundation

BongoJoe
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I wish I could earn as much working for free...

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Hotel guest goes broke after booking software gremlin makes her pay for strangers' rooms

BongoJoe
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One of my pet peeves

is that when a company messes up and offers a refund it always seems to take longer coming back into the account then it does leaving.

There is no reason why the hotel couldn't get someone around to the bank pretty bloody sharpish and deposit a load of notes into her account to pay her back right away.

It's worse, and quite unforgivable, when a company (and I am looking at you here, Eclipse Internet) delays any refunds by sending out a cheque - by second class post.

I hope that the lady in question hauls them over the coals if they don't offer proper compensation and letters of apology for what is effectively fraudulent behaviour.

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Utah fights man's attempt to marry laptop

BongoJoe
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Coat

Re: Flying with your laptop

Which is slightly better than having to 'turn on' your wife for the amusement of the border official.

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BongoJoe
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WTF?

So if he had married the laptop and in the next Windows 10 update the thing died with a BSOD would Microsoft be up for a murder rap?

Or would the doting husband to be be now unable to remove bits of the machine's hardware because that would be harvesting organs?

All stuff that those crazee Utans need to tell us, I am sure.

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Amazon granted patent to put parachutes inside shipping labels

BongoJoe
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Re: Just what I always wanted

Just what I always wanted

To have my packages conveniently delivered onto my roof, or a neighbor's tree!

At least Amazon can't patent that idea because it's already been done...

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Social media vetting for US visas go live

BongoJoe
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Re: @a_yank_lurker

Wasn't there a case of an executive who was transiting at a US airport. He came in from one country and going out to another, and not passing through US immigration. Yet, once he had disembarked his inbound flight, he was arrested and charged for actions that had happened (and were legal!) in another country.

I believe that he worked for an online betting company. I forget which one now.

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BongoJoe
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Re: 15 years of history?

When I lived in Antwerp I found that sometimes, when out on a drive along the polders I could cross the border about fifteen times in a morning when pottering around lanes at random just exploring.

As for phone numbers: I can't even remember my current land line number so trying to remember my previous phone numbers for the past fifteen years is a non starter and as my 3 (the network, not the quantity) data SIMs each had a phone number attached and never used as such this is going to be an impossible task.

These are just mind boggling stupid requests and I hate to even think what they consider to be employers and as for the way that I fund my trips...

I don't think that I will attempt to go back there again until sanity is restored.

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Google to give 6 months' warning for 2018 Chrome adblockalypse – report

BongoJoe
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I will never forget one of his lines: "I have seen the future. It is made of plastic."

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At the feet of the Great Monad, or, How the functional programming craze plays out

BongoJoe
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Re: Been there, done that

Which is why you always put a stripe across the top of the deck with a big black marker.

No, a DIAGONAL stripe so to spot the out of order cards.

Tsk. Kids. These days.

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Sainsbury's IT glitch spoils bank holiday food orders

BongoJoe
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Re: There is a simple solution

and that is go and get the stuff for youself. Even go to other supermarkets. It isn't the end of the world.

From here to the nearest Tesco of any size is an a hour and three quarters one way. There's a small ASDA about 40 minutes drive and an Iceland (but they don't deliver as we're too far away). The nearest Waitrose is about twenty minutes further than the Tesco and goodness knows how far the nearest Sainsburys is.

So, yes, we do need to rely on home delivery and the Tesco chaps like coming out here because they have a few drops to make on the same route (and we choose the multi-slot time to make it easier for them) and they enjoy being out here.

When you're living right on the ends of the earth it really is necessary to go for home delivery because otherwise the time spent going to and from the supermarkets, the parking charges if one has to pay them, the fuel costs all add up. Of course we could use the local shops for everything but their range is poor in comparison and, overall, their prices are higher because of convenience. In this sense convenience means a twenty minute drive each way...

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Apple fights off iTunes patent spat appeal

BongoJoe
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Clueless Twats?

Prior art suggests otherwise. Look at any Ancient Roman fort; they were rectangular with rounded corners so that attackers couldn't knock the corners off to gain access...

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UK ministers to push anti-encryption laws after election

BongoJoe
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Re: The encryption horse is free

Isn't the act of visiting an HTTPS site end-to-end encryption?

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PayPal peed off about Pandora's 'P' being mistaken for its 'PP'

BongoJoe
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Phil, my point above is the opposite.

PayPal may consider that Pandora's customers will think that the streaming company is associated with the bank.

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BongoJoe
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For once I am with the plaintiffs

As title.

At first glance it could easily be assumed that that Pandora is a part of the PayPal empire. In fact, it would take any amount of digging around to realise that it wasn't.

This, to me, looks a lazy way to take a ride hitching on someone else's coat tails. Now, normally I detest companies who get involved in these legal fisticuffs but, here, PayPal needs to do this.

I don't know which marketing brand twonk was responsible but like all marketing brand twonks they should be placed on the B Ark right now. I think North Korea is making a few at the moment.

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Huawei Honor 8 Pro: Makes iPhone 7 Plus look a bit crap

BongoJoe
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Howay man!

The Howay web site is hopeless. One of these bloody trendy responsive sites where the letters are three inches tall and unreadable as the eye has to scale each character one by one...

One thing that I couldn't find in the review or on the site concerns the second SIM. I have one of these dual SIMs in my WhineyFox and in areas where there's not good signal strength (i.e. where folk are blessed by no street lights) the second card is useless.

What's the story with the second SIM on this phone? Does it work in the Real World or do I have to be sitting rubbing shoulders with some twonk with a pork pie hat and beard, drinking a PratteLatte in a metrosexual built up area?

Yours slightly riled up because techical reviews don't seem to be as technical as they used to.

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Netgear 'fixes' router by adding phone-home features that record your IP and MAC address

BongoJoe
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Re: you can't be serious

As of next week I am going to live on a motorhome and travelling with a dongle. Good luck to anyone trying to work out my Geo-IP address. One week I could be here, another week I could be abroad in England or even in Scotland.

Sometimes I feel we should be swapping phones and routers with people at random.

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You'll get a kick out of this: Qualcomm patents the 'Internet of Shoes'

BongoJoe
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Logging

Why would I want to know how many steps my right shoe has made more than my left?

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MP3 'died' and nobody noticed: Key patents expire on golden oldie tech

BongoJoe
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Re: My old teacher...

Quite.

On one Stevie Wonder track, on a decent rig, one can hear a squeaking bass pedal and on one of my favourite Van Halen tracks, on a similar rig, is utterly spoiled by the fret buzz on Alex' acoustic which isn't audible on other kit.

Sometimes good kit, which need not be expensive, is too good for stuff which was recorded years ago that the engineers then couldn't hear.

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WannaCrypt 'may be the work of North Korea' theory floated

BongoJoe
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Re: Excuseotron

You missed 'Agile' and, also 'Oracle'

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BongoJoe
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Facepalm

Re: Naive Question

- Not following MS' guide lines (e.g. using undocumented APIs, assuming drive letters & folder locations)

I would think that I have got into more compatability issues by coding along to MS' guidelines.

And having looked at some MSDN over the decades I have wondered if they, internally, were following another set of standards, i.e. guidelines, to those that they were giving us developers who were Outside The Asylum.

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74 countries hit by NSA-powered WannaCrypt ransomware backdoor: Emergency fixes emitted by Microsoft for WinXP+

BongoJoe
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Re: Windows XP

Because I am a one man company with an application written in Visual Studio 6 which extends to over 130,000 lines of code and I don't have the time to rewrite it for .Net.

And why would I need to rewrite it? Because there seems to be a discrepency between how I and Microsoft define 'compatability' when it comes to backward compatability.

Under the latest operating systems it simply borks loading into the VS compiler. And there was me at the turn of the century choosing that operating system and Microsoft because then back in those heady days things were steady, stable and supported.

So, unless I stop work for a good number of months and recode everything I am stuck with XP. But I would simply just retire first and have done with it all. And if I did move to rewrite everything then it wouldn't be using .Net because I don't trust Microsoft any longer not to change things with .Net.

Which they have done so already.

So, what would you suggest that I do here? Seriously, what is your real world solution? And, oh, in case you ask why I haven't been slowly recoding this over the last fifteen years it's because I have been adding features to the application and things don't stop.

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BongoJoe
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Re: And we'd sure appreciate it if you could stop clicking on attachments

The other day I ordered something over the internet from a largish company. I was waiting for the delivery notification a day or two later when in popped an email from a domain name that could have been a similar sort of company.

It said that the link would give me tracking information for said product. I almost clicked it because I was expecting a product and from a company, as co-incidence would have it, similar in tone to the one purporting to send the message.

I could easily have caused no end of problems here.

I have witnessed people waiting for a delayed DHL delivery click on an 'DHL' email which took days of clearing up. Sensible people too.

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UK hospital meltdown after ransomware worm uses NSA vuln to raid IT

BongoJoe
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It's not hard to hear the opening chords of Deep Purple's "Child In Time" in one's head after reading what you put.

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Is Britain really worse at 4G than Peru?

BongoJoe
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4G? I don't even get 3G! I can see the local Vodaphone mast on Mynydd Rhiw from my house which is all of three miles away and, for some reason, it doesn't even carry data.

I think that the nearest proper mast is over in Harlech and that could well be in a completely different time zone as far as we are concerned. Certainly the indication on the 3 Network maps suggest so.

All this crap about 99% of the population being covered is nonsense. Nought percent is covered here.

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WileyFox disentangles itself from Cyanogen

BongoJoe
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Re: Functionality removed in 7.1.1 update

"User Experience"?

When the slimeVocabulary comes into everyday speech it's time to worry.

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It's paydaygeddon! NatWest account transfers 'disappearing' (not really)

BongoJoe
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Re: lotsofmoney.txt

I was told that these text files were .ini files

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M6 crowned crappiest motorway for 4G signal

BongoJoe
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Me neither. And when I get bored I tend to look out of the big window at the front.

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BongoJoe
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You ought to try from Machynlleth to Aberystwyth then!

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