* Posts by perlcat

540 posts • joined 13 Mar 2010

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Sarah Brightman plans International Space Station gig

perlcat
Paris Hilton

Re: Perfectly valid medical experiment

I'm more concerned with what happens to the jubblies. I can see myself generating a lot of money for breast cancer research with just a few hours of mesmerising footage.

Neil Gaiman’s saucy pop wife agrees to pay her musicians in money

perlcat
Facepalm

@daddyhoggy

Didn't you read OP's non-standard interpretation of TL;DC? She's TOO LATE coming up with a plan of not screwing her backup musicians, and her 15 minutes are up as a consequence. Pretty astute, I'd say.

perlcat
Unhappy

pub landlords -- I've met the type.

They seem to have the idiotic impression that:

A) the term 'play' means that performing music is your form of entertainment, and therefore, since it's "fun" for you, then payment for services rendered is optional.

B) that since you "play" for an hour, they should be able to pay you minimum wage for that time, ignoring all the time you spend practising, learning new music, etc.

C) Since they can "replace" you with recorded music, there is no reason at all to pay you.

To which I say:

Fuck you very much.

Climate change threatens to SHRINK FISH AND CHIP SUPPERS

perlcat
Facepalm

Re: "According to computer models...

According to the good doctor's logic, he can state with absolute assurance that he has had soup du jour, it was chicken, and [bedevere voice]logically,[/bedevere voice] every time you have soup du jour, it will be chicken for you as well.

Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.

Tibetan STATUE found by 1930s NAZI expedition is of ALIEN ORIGIN

perlcat
Coat

Re: ".....obvious ones include various aspects of the Indiana Jones flicks ...."

...and don't call Hellboy "Shirley"

Gigantic Roman bathtime-fun mosaic found under Turkish field

perlcat

Re: That's Cap'n lawndart to you, cully.

Yarrr. O' Course there be no gold, matey!

Me ol' pals Long John and Mouldy Todger buried all of it. Yarrr.

Ye not be knowin' of the ways of ye pirates and piratical lore.

Boffin named Jubb to fire whopping hybrid thruster

perlcat
Pint

Re: Stealing von Braun

...as the great Patrick F. McManus says, there's no better way to look intelligent than to smoke a pipe and look contemplative. You can get away with anything that way.

perlcat
Pint

Re: units

I like jubbs. Really, I do. What an awesome unit of measure.

perlcat
Pint

With that 'stache?

Any hour is a good hour for the G&T.

perlcat
Trollface

Re: I do like the British

...because without the immortalisation of a tombstone that reads "death by misadventure", there is no appeal. None at all.

[revoking your man card]

GSMA politely asks Uzbekistan to free locked-up telco bods

perlcat
FAIL

@sueme2

You need to highlight the phrase in quotes, CTRL+C, paste into google, and see where that came from, Chester.

Your education has been sorely neglected. I sentence you to at least six viewings of the instructional video in question.

perlcat
Facepalm

@ "Since when is MTS an US corporation?"

Forget it, he's rolling.

"Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!"

Climate denier bloggers sniff out new conspiracy

perlcat
Unhappy

@ ""I find it all kind of funny.

I don't. I find this kind of stuff (bogus science used to demonise opposing viewpoints) with the added legitimacy of "peer review" that turns out to be more of a "buddy review" to be downright scary. Especially when it gets used to gin up media lynch mobs that trash real people with real careers.

'Immortal cancer' found in Australia

perlcat
Coat

Re: It's somewhat sad...

I always thought that Tasmanian Devils were so damned *cute*, what with moving in little tornadoes, and marrying devilishes who arrive by plane looking for "object: matrimony".

Reagan slams webmail providers for liberal bias

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Upvote for not grokking that Mike doesn't understand that/or is lying. 'Course, he *could* have written something that is intelligent enough to id spam without also being able to profoundly violate your privacy in a Todd Akin-sort of way. I kill myself, I really do.

perlcat
Facepalm

Re: I expect

Alzheimer's cracks are about as unfunny as you can get. Just wait, karma *does* work, and you'll see.

perlcat
Trollface

Re: @thumbs down guy

butthurt much, bitch?

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: So basically

I figure it was a combination of a slow news day, and pandering to what Fox thinks is their demographic. I tune in for the laughs, meself. The people that take Beck seriously are, in the words of the immortal nutty photographer Dickie Roberts, "nucking futz".

perlcat
Trollface

Re: @perlcat

Don't care. Is relative. Me more smart than you, because I troll, you respond.

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Cheers

I wouldn't so much call then "right-wing" as much as I'd call them "schmucks" or more appropriately, "incompetent, egotistical statists".

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Young Master Reagan is using a stupid metric...

Yeah, but ol' Meg was a Schmuck after the mold of Romney.

Election 2012: "The Battle of the Schmucks".

Would that they be allowed to battle to the death for office -- then, regardless of who wins, we'd see a 50% reduction in political schmucks, and after a few cycles, could effectively flush the toilet we know as "Our Nation's Capital"

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Republican strategist

or: "hackneyed simile that ignores so much that you have to be totally stoned to make sense of it."

You need therapy dude. I suggest reading the comic nancy, what with all the fucked up zen-metaphors punctuated with the totally hotness of Auntie Fritzi and all her pop culture references. A good read when you're stoned, but hard to explain when you're not.

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: What an insecure rip-off

Meh. Any of them offering IMAP service *own* your data, and can troll/mine it for whatever they want. (Yeah, I know, even without IMAP, you can mine it, but this just makes it convenient and easy.)

I figure between Michael and Non Reagan, we have us a real life ying and yang thing going on.

perlcat
Mushroom

Bite me. IQ 150, unix sysadmin for 20+ years, what's yours, genius?

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Cheers

You know why I never got a reagan.com email address? First off, it detracts from whatever I say. People discount whatever you say based upon social cues like email domains and such, much like we automatically think the hipster in the coffee shop bragging over his bluetooth about his sexual escapades is a douchebag (and a liar -- the army has good reason to call those glasses hipsters wear "VD-prevention eyewear").

Google is entitled to free speech in the form of political donations, but apparently, Republicans are not socially entitled to such a liberty. Possessing a conservative bumper sticker is a good way to get your car keyed. Usually, you'll hear some self-righteous juvenile bullshit about sticking it to the man or whatever. Case in point: you think it's intelligent to block the domain. Sadly, you'll get shown a good deal more respect for exercising your right to free speech than I will get for exercising mine in pointing out this hypocrisy. I suppose your next trick will be trotting out the usual the lame-assed excuses and ad hominem justifications afterwards.

You could, of course, grow up, and realize that anybody sporting this domain has handily singled themselves out as a ripe target for your abuse, but I suppose that's too much for you to comprehend.

Lawyers: We'll pillory porn pirates who don't pay up

perlcat
Coat

Re: Fnarr Fnarr..."Alone Among Brutal Fuckers."

I thought it was a remake of "Mr. Smith goes to Washington"

New nuclear fuel source would power human race until 5000AD

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Processing seawater

"Somewhere along the way, you need someone to call out, "Wait a minute!" and keep the system within the bounds of civilized behavior."

This is what governments are for. They bridge the gap between what is most economic and what we as a society want. That is why we don't resolve liability issues with weregild.

However, to say that you should have all of one or the other is like building an airplane that is all wing, or all engine. Either way, it won't fly.

I'm not saying that socialist economies cannot come up with any innovation -- just that they tend to kill it off more than a country that acknowledges capitalism and leverages it. We *are* after all, flying into space on Russian rockets.

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: "genetically closer to crabs than to human beings"

Sen. Candidate Todd Akin? That you?

perlcat
Trollface

Re: @ Matt

Given the high human costs of what the Greenpeacers want, a better slang term for them is the "Soylent Greens".

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: @ Matt

I just figure they're the latest reincarnation of the Flat Earth Society.

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Processing seawater

Argh. More fundamental misunderstanding of capitalism.

Capitalism is descriptive. "I value X more than Y, so I am willing to pay more for X." Capitalism exists even in the deepest darkest socialist economies. (AKA Black Market).

If we as a society value keeping lights on more than having them off, we will find a way. We may not anticipate the exact way, but eventually someone will find a way, and allowing them to get filthy rich is actually a small cost in comparison to the benefit. Punishing people for coming up with clever solutions is not effective in the long run, which is why socialism tends to be less successful than a society that encourages capitalism.

Good example IRL. I know somebody that knows where a mineral is. It is in the control of a socialist economy. If he tells them they have it, and where it is, they may give him $30,000/year as a worker bee. He says "Screw it. Why bother? If the mineral yield is expensive/poorer than anticipated, they'll be after my hide, and if it works, I get a paltry sum." I agree.

You are thinking in terms of the technology you "know", and not of the drive to develop a new technology when you throw out your "it'll never work because the numbers are too big" argument. The failure to develop profound new technologies is endemic to socialist economies, by the way, as they all devolve into bureaucracies, and there is no better way to smother growth than to have 10,000 GS-5's go after innovation because it challenges their place in the hierarchy of things...

Just as an example, assuming they set up the filter using a small portion of the Gulf Stream flow, your entire argument sequence falls apart. (I'm not saying that's the best plan -- wouldn't want to screw up the climate changes the Gulf Stream brings to northern Europe, for just one thing)

perlcat
Trollface

Re: How long are you talking exactly?

A much safer suffix is "CE", which means "Christian Era".

U mad Bro?

perlcat
Trollface

@ NomNomNom

Were you aware that Hitler was very keen on lime Jell-O?

[glaring significantly]

perlcat
Trollface

@ Matt

I'm no fan of the luddite GreenPeacers either, but are you aware your unhealthy penile obsession totally obliterates your point?

perlcat
Black Helicopters

Re: Actually one thing I could add

I disagree. I think you need a profit motive to make it as efficient as possible, and you need rigorous governmental oversight to bend the economics curve so the profit motive incorporates safety into the plan. If you go all one way or the other, you miss out on the unique benefits either organizational structure brings. I want cake and to eat it.

Cloud engineering could save humantiy, suggests boffin

perlcat

@Captain Hogwash

Look out for the priests of the Temple of Syrinx...

Reg readers scrap over ultimate bacon sarnie

perlcat
Facepalm

Re: Head above parapet

From the behavior of the vegetarians/vegans I know, the hardest part about it is telling other people what to eat and why.

BOFH: Our Excel-lent new boss and the diagram plan

perlcat
Black Helicopters

@Vic & Rambler88

Yes, I am more than willing to take it out on him in the invoicing, but he's playing with somebody else's money, and doesn't care. While I'm not so proud that I wouldn't wash cars and type papers for $300/hr, it sets a bad precedent, and hard to get that sort of work at that rate once I let it get started. Far better to whip my cattle prod out early in the process, show him how it's all charged up & ready to go. I do it for the satisfaction of the look on his face.

perlcat
Facepalm

Re: Not quite accurate

Wow, you have the technically able boss. Kind of a high-functioning moron, if you will. Mine tried to make me print them out, and put them in a binder. My answer is that "I ain't your fucking secretary. Do it yourself."

NASA’s new lander CRASHES AND BURNS

perlcat
Facepalm

Re: After 8 pints and a vindaloo

Zero calories as in it doesn't stay in your gut long enough to add to your caloric intake for the day. A form of Ex-Lax, but with a new and improved sonic boom.

perlcat
Mushroom

Re: After 8 pints and a vindaloo

It's Popeye's Fried (Zero-Calorie) chicken over here, but same principle applies.

perlcat
Facepalm

They must be slipping.

I can't figure out why they were testing something that they claim can explode in the course of testing right next to a truck full of hydrogen tanks.

Methinks that if you'd asked them *before* they lit the fuse, they'd have said it was "perfectly safe. We don't blow shit up anymore."

I'm just happy that wacky hijinks didn't ensue with hydrogen for added kaboom.

How one bad algorithm cost traders $440m

perlcat
Facepalm

life imitates art:

Michael Bolton: Okay! I must have put a decimal point in the wrong place or something. Shit! I always do that. I always mess up some mundane detail.

Jackson’s Hobbit becomes a trilogy

perlcat
Black Helicopters

He has a long uphill road to travel to make this good

Every previous Hobbit movie had that gawd-awful singing in it, trying to keep faithful to the book. Don't get me wrong -- I love all the books, but 'The Hobbit' was pure kiddie lit, while the 2nd and 3rd volume of the LOTR were serious fiction.

Tolkien's genius took a long time to evolve, but it turned into a masterpiece. Watching/reading 'The Hobbit' after those is like looking at the stick figures Van Gogh drew and stuck on whatever passed his mum's refrigerator.

[ducking from the inevitable hailstorm of fanboy abuse]

perlcat
Coat

Re: Ballad of Bilbo Baggins

Don't let's forget that it could also feature Shatner shouting shitty shanties about Shagrat shyly shagging shifty sheep.

BOFH: Shove your project managementry up your mailbox!

perlcat
Trollface

Re: Simple solution

Nah, the use of 'empowered' proves that he's one of "Them".

perlcat
Trollface

Re: /sigh

yes and no. Like listening to the wife, and nodding at random times and saying "uh huh", "yep", "That's right", "You're right", you can safely coast through until you discover later that you've agreed to paint the house or some other odious chore. (Happened to me.)

Best idea now is to carry two cell phones, call one from the other, and then look like I'm deep in listening to someone troubleshooting an issue.

perlcat
Pint

@ Matthew 3

"Humpification process". Heh.

His instructions were a tad unclear, though...

imgur.com/gallery/J7HSN

Sysadmins! There's no shame in using a mouse to delete files

perlcat
FAIL

Re: CTRL+Z

Yeah, it works just fine if you were trying to do task A, something went wrong, and you knew about it when it happened. Again, the problem is when you do the click-swipe thing, and don't catch it immediately.

Why one storage admin fears Justin Bieber

perlcat
Coat

Re: Ermm....

The only problem I've ever noticed with my preferred storage method for shit like this is that occasionally. when the flow of Bieber crap is too heavy, /dev/null throws up in its mouth just a little.

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