* Posts by Mystic Megabyte

1517 posts • joined 18 Feb 2010

Baywatch hero drone saves silly struggling swimmers Down Under from going down under

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Linux

@Duncanlarge

The Baie des Trepasses in Brittany is a good place for a swim. The tide always seems to push you towards the beach. It's named for the bodies that washed up after shipwrecks in the area.

I've scuba dived with a wild dolphin that used to regularly visit the bay. Good lobster to be had!

I deliberately made a Bing link, now you guys can say that you've seen one :)

https://binged.it/2DOiqxa

0
0

US Congress seizes net neutrality, stuffs it into a bipartisan black hole

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Question

If NN is ended will the ISPs be using deep packet inspection technology? If so I might buy some shares in Phorm because I bet they have not entirely disappeared.

For leftpondians this slightly jokey post has a serious side. If deep packet inspection is used, the internet as you know it will end and you will be paying extra for the "privilege" of a totally crap experience.

Edit: It seems that they finally went bust in 2016

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phorm

0
0

Mystery surrounds fate of secret satellite slung by SpaceX

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

??

I read somewhere that the launch was delayed due to problems with the satelite's shroud. Maybe Zuma is still in it's box.

0
0

Multiple-guess quiz will make Brit fliers safer, hopes drone-maker DJI

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

Bye!

A neighbour launched his brand-new drone without RTFM. It took off, vanished into the fog and is presumed lost at sea :)

1
0

SuperFish cram scandal: Lenovo must now ask nicely before stuffing new PCs with crapware

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Happy

@AC

>>My son has severe learning difficulties and autism. He loves going on the computer and looking at pictures of trains

Here's a nice European based site: Choose a language, open a map, then click on a pointer. That section of railway will open in a window. Then click the YouTube icon in the bottom right to see a drivers point of view video. Your son may learn some geography and have fun being the train driver.

http://bahntv.eu/en/duitsland

6
0

Kernel-memory-leaking Intel processor design flaw forces Linux, Windows redesign

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Linux

Back from the dead

I was going to throw out two old HP AMD dual core laptops. Now I think I'll just replace the backlights and keep them. (they run Ubuntu or Mint perfectly well) In the meantime maybe it's safer to browse the web with a Raspberry Pi than this Lenovo with Intel inside.

10
0

Astroboffins say our Solar System could have – wait, stop, what... the US govt found UFOs?

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Alien UFO's are Real - True / False...

@Paper

It's not so far fetched if you think about how many people, probably including readers on this very site, who believe in god because of so many circumstantial, hear-say and personal revelations. Yet not one solid scrap of evidence to show that a god exists.

The existence of God can only be deduced. If for example you believe in the Big Bang theory you must hold contradictory beliefs. Every other quantum fluctuation that we know of results in the particles annihilating each other very quickly. So the Big Bang was either a miracle or perhaps the universe willed itself into existence. Prior to the BB, spacetime did not exist. So how could there be any quantum fluctuations in the first place? Did some being poke a hole through from some other dimension? If so, that being must be our god.

Merry Christmas to the ElReg staff and all the commentards :)

11
25

Cloud-building alien space rays altered Earth's climate – boffins

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

Re: In what universe is this hard science?

"The team studied the effects of cosmic rays on a simulation of Earth’s atmosphere, recreated inside a cloud chamber, which mimics the planet’s upper atmosphere inside a controlled lab setting where these interactions can be studied up close."

http://www.ibtimes.com/cosmic-rays-trigger-climate-change-earth-increasing-cloud-cover-study-2630728

1
0

Ghostery, uBlock lead the anti-track pack

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Unhappy

NoScript no work

On Firefox 57.0.1 I've had to disable NoScript. The UI is terrible and some sites just won't load. It's a shame because I've used it for years, maybe it will be fixed soon.

6
0

Facebook flashes ramped-up face-recog tech. Try not to freak out

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
WTF?

A load of punts!

...other people that searched for gondolas also were interested in buying canals.

5
0

Fridge killed my baby? Mag-field radiation from household stuff 'boosts miscarriage risk'

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Stop

Noooooo!

For example, at a distance of one-inch, a clothes iron emits 80-300mG of MF radiation, and an electric blanket emits 3-50mG.

You can keep my clothes iron but you'd have to prise my electric blanket out of my cold dead hands.

4
0

Kaspersky dragged into US govt's trashcan as weaponized blockchain agile devops mulled

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Linux

Wormold

I'm going to install Kaspersky (Linux version) and send myself an email with plans attached for a giant vacuum cleaner that's labelled "Top Secret". Suck on that Ruskies!

0
0

Trump to NASA: Fly me (or some other guys) to the Moon

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Unhappy

Black to the moon?

I've seen the historical documentary, only this time around there's already a Nazi in the White House.

8
1

SpaceX to try reusing both rocket and spacecraft for historic ISS mission

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

spaceshit Ctrl+W spaceship

I used to share a house with some Ghanaian dudes and after a red-hot meat stew with foo-foo and okra you may well have explosive decompression in the morning. Not a good choice for space food!

I'd like to go into space but only for a few days, the cuisine must be very bland.

8
2

FCC backtracks on helping with neutrality fraud investigation

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Stop

History

It's not often that you get to witness history in the making but the *USA just became history. Trump was rejected by the rich for being a crass obnoxious buffoon and now he wants to make them grovel. He may have a billion dollars but Putin has 200 billion and Trump wants more. Even if Trump drops dead tomorrow the damage has been done, see how many cronies are now in key jobs and how the far right has been empowered. "Divide and rule", it always works.

Now the maniac wants his own secret service, the Stasi is reborn.

I'm hoping that Trump gets struck by lightning while playing golf, that would be Karma. I should not be having thoughts like this, I'm not a politically motivated person, but this sad excuse of a man is just too awful; the epitome of greed.

Video is SFW but soon to be throttled and only available on a premier plan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hOky9LFO6o

* The USA that did a lot of good things.

17
0

VW's US environment boss gets seven years for Dieselgate scam

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Stop

“This sentence reflects how seriously we take environmental crime. "

Not if your name is Donald Trump who is doing his best to ruin the USA.

21
1

Foil snack food bags make a decent Faraday cage, judge finds

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Stop

golf

I deeply offended two guys that I met who were wearing identical outdoor jackets. After looking at the jacket's logos I asked if it were a car dealership. Apparently these were top of the range golfing apparel. Oops!

Anyway, I once heard golf described as "an abomination" by a comedienne, I agree with her.

16
0

Ad-filtering fiend Eyeo: Morning has broken, like the first morning

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

2

Two things that will never happen:

1) Web-sites will indemnify me for loss due to malvertising.

2) I'll switch off the ad-blocker.

9
1

Lauri Love appeal: 'If he's dead, no victim's going to get anything'

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
WTF?

MAGA? Nope!

Now that Trump is re-tweeting Fascist propaganda, Love's defence could argue that he's being sent to a potential war zone.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-42166663

7
1

Watchkeeper drones cost taxpayers £1bn

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Mushroom

Good value

"to have successfully conducted a test flight in civilian-controlled non-segregated UK airspace"

That's going to be handy if they plan to bomb Luton or Reading. Maybe also Basildon :)

13
0

Fujitsu imagines adjusting your rear view mirror for better hearing

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Ultrasound

For the American market they'd have to attach some warnings:

"People in the mirror are bigger than they appear"

"Your dog is now deaf"

10
0

Ads watchdog to BT: We say your itsy bitsy, teeny weeny Ts&Cs too small for screeny

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

Not just on TV

On every offer from BT that arrives by post there is always a load of small print. Right at the bottom it will have "More terms and conditions exist, see BT.com".

How can this be legal? Where is it hidden on their web-site? How often are these terms changed?

I have absolutely no faith in BT, they are bunch of scheming bastards.

16
0

London mayor: Self-driving cars? Not without jacked-up taxes, you don't!

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Long range

In ye olden days it was possible to syphon some petrol from a car to put into your moped. Would it now be possible to plug into an electric car and charge up an electric bicycle? Asking for a friend :)

2
0

'Gimme Gimme Gimme' Easter egg in man breaks automated tests at 00:30

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Re: Unprofessional bollocks

Like this?

"Easter eggs in the 1997 version of Microsoft Office include a hidden flight simulator in Microsoft Excel and a pinball game in Microsoft Word.[18][19] "

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easter_egg_(media)#Software

28
1

Level 5 driverless cars by 2021 can be done, say Brit industry folk

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Happy

driverless/carless

1) Summon driverless car

2) Destination: a shipping container on a dark industrial estate

2a) Load shipping container onto driverless truck, Destination: Automated port facility

3) Ship it to $remote_country

4) Profit!

4
0

What is DJI Terra? Mystery builds over Chinese biz's trademark

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Mushroom

Will it run Vista?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IfnjBHtjHc

1
0

Remember CompuServe forums? They're still around! Also they're about to die

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Where's the time gone?

I fondly remember getting on the internet with Compuserve. I had a 286 powered greyscale* screen laptop and a modem. The only problem was when I tried to leave Compuserve, they kept saying "well you just emailed us so you are still using our service". I had to tell the bank to stop all payments to them.

*or possibly monochrome with Hercules style dithering, I can't remember.

2
0

MPs slam HMRC's 'deeply worrying' lack of post-Brexit customs system

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Unhappy

What a disaster

But after the bigly trade deal with Trump all the sub-standard USA food products will just fly through customs with no problems. We are screwed.

12
2

Amazon to make multiple Lord of the Rings prequel TV series

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Running up stairways of falling rocks @phil

Nah, tits and dragons, tits.

Filmed on location on the Paps of Jura.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paps_of_Jura

4
0

Boffins on alert: Brace yourselves for huge gravitational wave coming within a decade

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

whoops!

So how many points do you score in intergalactic bar billiards if you pot one supermassive black hole into another?

None if you knock over the giant black space mushroom :(

12
1

Teensy weensy space shuttle flies and lands

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: Space fighter, or at least a toy for the very rich

Beware of silk scarves and rotating machinery, including wheels.

http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/dancer-isadora-duncan-is-killed-in-car-accident

6
0

Metal 3D printing at 100 times the speed and a twentieth of the cost

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Re: Possibilities

I wonder if it could print replacement cabinet ministers?

You only need a 2D printer for that.

21
0

Jet packs are real – and inventor just broke world speed record in it

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Meh

Top tip for Richard Browning, wear bright coloured clothing so that your body will more easily be found.

15
0

Brit moron tried buying a car bomb on dark web, posted it to his address. Now he's screwed

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

teenagers

My guess is that he wanted to blow up his parents because they would not lend him their car or date white girls or go to pubs/clubs etc. I'm sure that most teenagers go through a phase of wanting their parents dead at some time or another. Usually the phase passes, in strict households the urge may be stronger.

3
1

Mythbuster seeks cash for roller skates to wear in virtual reality

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

No thanks

That graphic does not show the backpack holding an 80lb. tractor battery to power the stupid shoes.

4
0

Paradise Papers were not an inside job, says leaky offshore law firm

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
FAIL

Welcome to the new order

From the ICIJ site:

https://www.icij.org/investigations/paradise-papers/paradise-papers-exposes-donald-trump-russia-links-and-piggy-banks-of-the-wealthiest-1-percent/

One offshore web leads to Trump’s commerce secretary, private equity tycoon Wilbur Ross, who has a stake in a shipping company that has received more than $68 million in revenue since 2014 from a Russian energy company co-owned by the son-in-law of Russian President Vladimir Putin.

In all, the offshore ties of more than a dozen Trump advisers, Cabinet members and major donors appear in the leaked data.

I think that the GOP may well have made the biggest mistake in their entire history.

4
0

Those IT gadget freebies you picked up this year? They make AWFUL Christmas presents

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Pint

chilli sambuca

My local pub sells this, being almost luminous green it looks disgusting. But it tastes great, just what's needed on a cold day. I can't remember the brand, it's that good :)

2
0

Facebook, Amazon fund new trans-Pacific submarine cable

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Slack

I hope that they remember to leave a big loop of slack cable at the Japanese end. Didn't Japan move a metre to the left during the last big earthquake?

Edit: I'm wrong, it moved 2.4m towards North America. That's ruined my image of the plug being pulled out of the wall in Los Angeles :(

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_T%C5%8Dhoku_earthquake_and_tsunami#Geophysical_effects

7
0

Fines for crossing roads while TXTing enacted in Honolulu

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Stop

iPods? Hawaii?

It would be interesting to know how many people have been run down by a big yellow taxi whilst listening to "Big yellow taxi".

5
0

Forget One Windows, Microsoft says it's time to modernize your apps

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
WTF?

Patronising POS

I don't know about Win 10 but what gets my goat is Win 8s patronising dialogues. Things like "We are searching for blah", "We are just setting up blah". FFS it's a computer not a dating site!! I don't want a personal relationship with a fecking computer. How many people are actually inside the box? [A likely MS response would be: Our name is Legion, for we are many]

Remember the little drum and sticks animation in Win 98? That used to drive me crazy when,"Searching for drivers", but I'd rather have that sort of impersonal dialogue back now thank you very much!

While I'm in the middle of a good rant, Cortana, Siri, OKG and Alexa can all feck off as well!

<goes off to cuddle baby rabbits :) >

For the youngsters, here's a link: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C_pX_L3XoAAn8bX.jpg

26
0

Google: We don't have a quantum computer yet, but we have a compiler

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Boffin

Sorry

$ git clone https://github.com/rigetticomputing/forestopenfermion

: Warning! There is a 50% chance that the code will be DOA. Proceed? (y/n)

6
0

Plants in SPAAAAAAACE are good for you

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Happy

Weed

If astronauts grew dope would they become spaced-out?

8
1

You can yacht be serious: Larry might be planning his own version of America’s Cup

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Joke

Left hand down a bit!

Larry's plans are hard to fathom, he could be full of sheet.

<sorry if that was tackless....OK I'm going now>

10
0

So the 'Year of Linux' never happened. When is it Chrome OS's turn?

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge

Re: Work on the move

Just buy a low profile stick, they only protrude about 4mm so you can just leave it plugged in.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/New-SanDisk-32GB-Cruzer-Fit-USB-Flash-Drive-Memory-Stick-Pen-Thumb-New-Sealed-/291619932656?hash=item43e5e709f0

6
4

Argh, my loafer just fell down the rope ladder! Yes, I'm in the Microsoft treehouse

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Unhappy

Screw that!

Any arborists around here?

Will screwing bloody great bolts into the trees have any effect on its health? See at: 22sec.

I could not watch it much further, I was going to puke.

1
3

Man prosecuted for posting a picture of his hobby on Facebook

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Holmes

Fail

A couple of years ago I was involved in a search for a missing fisherman. When his body was found a couple of plods were flown by helicopter from Glasgow to "investigate". Having only been issued with the "Junior Detective Kit" they asked to borrow our camera! We never did get the SD card back :(

7
0

The Google Home Mini: Great, right up until you want to smash it in fury

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Coat

Last week Google helpfully sent me travel directions to the airports that I had already arrived at. It must have scanned the boarding passes that were on my phone

Due to strange voices coming from my pocket the OK Google function is disabled and I won't be buying any sort of "digital assistant".

My coat is the one that doesn't talk back ============>

23
0

Grant Shapps of coup shame fame stands by 'broadbad' research

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Linux

My up is down :(

I just now ran this command, with such a pathetic upload speed I'm never likely to be using the "cloud".

$ speedtest-cli --simple

Ping: 58.334 ms

Download: 2.96 Mbit/s

Upload: 0.36 Mbit/s

0
0

Rejecting Sonos' private data slurp basically bricks bloke's boombox

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Roll your own

Thanks for that link, it's been bookmarked. I love his retro portable player, I'm going to have to make one of those!

http://www.gerrelt.nl/RaspberryPi/wordpress/portable-retro-squeezelite-player/

P.S. I use an Akai tuner/amp which I bought for £4 in a jumble sale 23 years ago. The tuner's stereo decoder has recently failed but the amp still sounds great.

3
0

In current affairs news: Teen boffin with lots of potential crafts electric honeycombs out of oil

Mystic Megabyte
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Mpemba

I like to quote the Mpemba effect when someone makes the mistake of using logic (or the lack of it) instead of experimentation. I tried to discuss this with a con-trail conspiracy believer but made little progress :(

So well done Muhammad Shaheer Niazi.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mpemba_effect

Edit: Mpemba was initially mocked for his observation.

11
0

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018