* Posts by FozzyBear

396 posts • joined 15 Feb 2010

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Australia bins safe harbour, presses ahead with Minister-as-NetAdmin plan

FozzyBear
Pirate

Whilst everyone is bagging trump.

Along comes Brandis, who has achieved a new level of fucked up, delusional, power hungry,self absorbed craziness. Seriously speed balling coke, ice and pcp with shaved glass still wouldn't reach the his level of lunacy

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MI5 man to steer GCHQ as Trump wiretapping saga continues

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

During the primary elections this site reported that Mcafee would be running for president. I commented that if he won at least the news would be entertaining to watch.

I would like to retract that comment. I was wrong. Trump is WAY more entertaining.

The way things are going I can only hope that we soon see an all in brawl between the politicians and the jornos on the white house lawn. Now THAT would be entertainment.

On second thought why wait. Can I get a Playmobil reconstruction, with Jakety sax as the background music

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WWE star's swiped sex snaps survey spam snares selfie sickos

FozzyBear
Devil

And on the right of my screen while reading the article

one ad

"How older guys are lasting longer at the gym"

Can't escape the click bait

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60 slow-mo A-bomb test videos explode onto YouTube

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

Thanks

I've saved the links and reading suggestions from above.

I have an uneasy feeling that I wont make it into work if I start reading this material on the train.

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Dungeons & Dragons finally going digital

FozzyBear
Happy

Sounds like it's a Portal of annihilation to me.

I'm old school. Paper, pencil and splat book. Add a six pack of beer of choice, great mates and I'm set for the afternoon. We are have a house rule all mobile devices into a bowl, first to check or attempt to check the device buys the beers next time.

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Tech titan pals back up Google after 'foreign server data' FBI warrant ruling

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Team America

World Police.

Fuck Yeah!

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'Baby, I know your database needs upgrades tonight'

FozzyBear
Alien

The drugs the marketing department use must be pharmaceutical grade hallucinogens. It is the only rational reason I can think of that they thought this would be a great idea

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Stop the press: Journos not happy losing jobs to journo bots, say journos

FozzyBear
Flame

"Most journalists agreed that robot-churned copy lacked depth, creativity, and complexity compared to articles by experienced human journalists."

In other words it reported the facts as they were and didn't include biased opinionated crap. Or it didn't smear the facts to the point that the article resembles the news in name only.

Whatever happened to reporting the news of the day factually and allowing the reader to form their own opinion, you know like journalists as supposed to do.

4
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Pack your bags! NASA spots SEVEN nearby Earth-sized alien worlds

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Re: Tides and stuff

"Isn't part of the current theory of why advanced life evolved here "

Considering society today with the bigotry, wars, religious fanaticism and cults, "our" love of social media, reality TV shows, soap operas. Economic markets that are not economic. Leaders who can't lead, managers who can't manage. Politics worldwide that enables the incompetent to rise to the top and where ignorance is no barrier to bending policies and laws to your viewpoint.

The argument can be made that it still hasn't.

1
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IBM to UK staff: Get ready for another game of musical chairs

FozzyBear
Devil

Is anyone really surprised nowadays

As previous comments have noted the top execs are really only interested in making their annual bonuses and jumping ship before it all turns to custard.

Until a mind shift is made doing away with the annual bonus scheme this will continue. If execs want to be paid millions to manage then tie the bastards into a bonus scheme that can't be manipulated by fiddling figures on a spreadhseet

4
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Dirty data, flogged cores: YES, Microsoft SQL Server R Services has its positives

FozzyBear
Devil

Anyone

That attaches R or other analytical services directly to their production databases should be shot, drawn and quartered, stabbed, poisoned, drowned, impaled, tortured and then finally their tattered remains hung above the entry to the IT department as a warning to others

And I hope everyone recognises the restraint I have shown in the punishments that should be inflicted on the individual

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Australia wants to jail infosec researchers for pointing out dodgy data

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

Brandis

This man is in serious need of an arse kicking.

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Secret HPE letter tells sales team and partners to keep selling Arista 'confidently'

FozzyBear
Paris Hilton

HPE and Arista maybe bed mates at the moment. But if IT business history tells us anything HPE will be sneaking out of the room before the afterglow has subsided

0
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AU$240m went up in smoke on failed school portal project

FozzyBear
Mushroom

warned it might make a corruption finding in its investigation.

Seriously! Is there any doubt.

Or is this going to be the usual government fubar. Where wasting hundreds of millions in dollars of tax payers money through incompetence, greed, and corruption is swept under the carpet.

0
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Trump signs 'no privacy for non-Americans' order – what does that mean for rest of us?

FozzyBear
Joke

Re: Trump has become more deranged

I am waiting for the day when someone will actually start shooting at the trump, for no other reason other than so I can hear the Secret service yell Donald DUCK!

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5

HP Inc recalls 101,000 laptop batteries before they halt and catch fire

FozzyBear
Flame

Missed marketing opportunity

HP Laptops

"Keep your employees chained to the desk with our new range of laptops with integrated cook tops. Your employees can now work and cook their morning breakfast or keep their lunch warm Even less excuses from being away from their desks.

* Fire extinguishers sold separately

I'm sure tops execs would view this as a great idea.

0
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Furby Rickroll demo: What fresh hell is this?

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

Friggin awesome

I will from now on, instead of the standard playmobile reconstruction, request a furby hack. Need a new icon now too.

2
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Western Union coughs up $586m for turning a blind eye to fraudsters

FozzyBear
Unhappy

and the senior execs escape the possibility of jail. Good for them, retain the incentives they have earned and make the company itself pay out the fines. We wouldn't want them to downgrade to a BMW 5 series that just wouldn't be ethical.

1
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Resistence is futile: HPE must face Oracle over Solaris IP

FozzyBear

Re: Really??

The problem with that is, these companies don't want to innovate anymore. they just lay in wait for the next startup that does something interesting, buy it up, re badge it as their own and rake in the profits. The lawyers, who have all the reasoning of a group of guard dogs on meth, then attack anyone that even remotely attacks their profits/turf.

3
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Elementary, my dear IBM: When will Watson make money?

FozzyBear
Pint

Watson has a lot of learning to do

Attended an IBM event early last year where they famously marketed Watson was used to "design" the lunch menu. Lunch arrives and I get a look at the lunch they are serving up. I walked out of the event to the corner pub for a counter lunch and a couple of beers. Quite a few others joined me.

2
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Korean boffins vow 1,000km-an-hour supertrain

FozzyBear

Me

I'd be happy with a train service here in Sydney that is relatively cheap and reliable. At least once a week I'm stranded on a platform because the intercity service has been cancelled due to mechanical fault. But that what you get with a hundred year old system.

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Australia's Department of Social Services pushing ahead with data-matching plans

FozzyBear
Facepalm

I look forward to hearing the news report

Outlining how the federal government yet again screwed things up and all the De-identified data actually contained identification details on millions of individuals. Which unfortunately anyone was able to access and download through their unsecured gateway.

The good news is that government insists that it will get things right on the 3rd or 4th attempt, after ensuring that no politicians information was contained in those data files.

2
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UK's lords want more details on adult website check plans

FozzyBear

Re: Any Ideas?

I have one.

What we need is a group of people, we can put in charge, who due to their lack of intelligence cannot hold a single thought for a second. They can periodically come together to discuss whatever insane ideas crawl across the salt pans of their minds. Endlessly accusing each other of being a fool never coming to a census. In that way these moronic ideas can never be implemented.

Sad isn't it

Democracy, great in theory, a fucking disaster in practice.

3
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It's now 2017, and your Windows PC can still be pwned by a Word file

FozzyBear
Happy

Pick a year between 1990 to 2050 and this "news" article would still be relevant. With any luck I'll still be here complaining about it too.

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Asteroid nearly gave Earth a new feature, two days after its discovery

FozzyBear

We still have Bruce Willis and team on standby, right?

6
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And for our next trick, says Google while literally wheeling out a humongous tablet ...

FozzyBear

Sorry I'm old school

You can keep the fancy tech, buzz words and other crap. If there is that rare meeting in which something meaningful is being discussed a white board or even a few sheets of butchers paper is all that's needed

4
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Newly discovered cave-dwelling creepy-crawly is four times the man* you are

FozzyBear

Are you sure? I thought there wasn't a penis attached to any of the members of the band

0
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Australia's IBM-assisted Census fail burned AU$30 MEEELLION

FozzyBear
Mushroom

So now IBM have base information on the Australian people including their names. Charming.

Tell me they wont use that information for their own purposes!!

0
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Here's how much HP's 3-in-1 PC replacement will cost you

FozzyBear
Devil

Sounds like HP are targeting those managers that feel the need to brag to their mates "look what I've got". Also considering they have no clue it takes a pub full of tech support to hand hold them and fix all the problems they cause when someone isn't there hand holding them.

Or one clued in BOFH with a Hammer and a bag of lime

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The exploding Note 7 is no surprise – leaked Samsung doc highlights toxic internal culture

FozzyBear
WTF?

Working 100+ hours in a week and after all your efforts you get a signed photo of the CEO as your reward. The only sane response I can think of involves recreating axe scenes from American psycho.

.

.

Or maybe I just haven't had enough coffee yet to form a proper response. any hoo

7
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Oz gummint's de-anonymisation crime is as mind-bendingly stupid as we feared

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

My paranoia is red lining at the moment. This bill appears to have all the markings of a 1980's east European regime.The sooner Brandis is removed from office the better we'll be.

1
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'There may be no hackers' says Trump in Presidential Debate II

FozzyBear
Facepalm

Last year El Reg ran a story on John Mcafee running for president.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/09/08/mcafee2016/

Based on those original stories and comments and the happenings over the last 5 months. There are a few that have come to light.

Firstly John can no longer be considered the craziest nor most dangerous nominee. Trump and Clinton has John reaching for the coke and magic mushrooms trying to keep up with their level of crazy

Secondly John would make for entertaining TV. Man I was dead wrong on that point.

Thirdly, If John was still running for president you're choices would be clinton or trump or a person who has been charged with drug driving and firearm offences with only a tenuous grasp on reality.

It would make the decision quite easy

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1

Windows 10 market share fell in September

FozzyBear
Thumb Down

Recently bought new laptop with Win10. I thought:meh give it a go."

After the second hour of setting up the preferences and turning off all the crap that Micro$lop uses to siphons off information , with additional popups, macfee consistently polluting my screen, xbox crap my indifference has turned too pure unadulterated hatred. Once I've finished this certification course I will be taking great pleasure in trashing this travesty of an OS.

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18 seconds that blacked out South Australia

FozzyBear
WTF?

Since when has a politicians lack of knowledge, intelligence or even rational thought stopped them voicing their ridiculous thoughts or ideas on the national or global stage.

It's the only "profession" where, from what I've seen, even a spark of intelligence is a hindrance. Unless you count the senior managers at my company of curse.

13
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TAFE's troubled TITSUP tech terminated AT BLOODY LAST

FozzyBear
Pint

Popcorn please

The blame game on this will make for entertaining reading. Considering the federal election and education as usual is one of the utopian promises, this should see a lot of air time

Beer icon > I need something to wash down all that buttery salty goodness

0
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Microsoft joins battery-saving browser bandwagon with Edge claims

FozzyBear
Linux

Great

Now what is it's rating and capabilities when it comes to

>Security features,

>Web page rendering (timing and quality)

>user options and configurability

Seriously how many people are going to put battery life based on browsing before security and configurations features. Congratulations Micro$lop you missed the (bench)mark again

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Orlando shootings bring Facebook's safety check to US soil

FozzyBear

Terrorism or not

Facebook or not. I am simply at a loss of words to describe the feelings

I have towards the deranged madman who could so easily open fire on a group of people. Hate seems so... lacking in strength.

The feelings I have for the victims and their families

and I hate myself for the feelings I have when I thank the <Deity>, I normally don't believe in that I was not in the middle this

5
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Google snubs 'dark money' questions at AGM. Shareholder power? Yeah, right

FozzyBear
Devil

Re: Power corrupts...

The BOFH in me needs to amend that

Power Corrupts, absolute power is even more fun.

1
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The least stressful job in the US? Information security analyst, duh

FozzyBear
Devil

Interesting

The first thing that crossed my mind is that someone was able to bypass security and change the survey results. Just sayin'. someone may want to check that

7
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Water divining project abandoned after blowing AU$60k

FozzyBear
FAIL

Ladies and gentlemen

Hiring a guy whose equipment and experience consists of a couple of metal rods and wandering aimlessly around the landscape

I embarrassingly present to you the level of intelligence of our local councils!

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US nuke arsenal runs on 1970s IBM 'puter waving 8-inch floppies

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Would you like to play a game?

1. tic-tac-toe

2. Global thermonuclear War

3. Chess

>

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Thai bloke battles jumbo python in toilet todger thriller

FozzyBear

Re: Skilled

Dunedoo (pronounced DunnyDoo) NSW Australia

5
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Boffins achieve 'breakthrough' in random number generation

FozzyBear
Joke

PPFFTT!

I'm a Hollywood hacker. Simply typing "override" will blast through any crypto key or security, any system has. "hack the Planet"

7
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Iraq shuts down internet to prevent exam cheating. The country's entire internet

FozzyBear
WTF?

When did we start expecting rational thought and decision making from the politicians from that part of the world? Well to be honest from any country's ruling party?

8
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Dark web hacking forum hacked and members' privates exposed

FozzyBear
Devil

And if anyone used any information, remotely true, about their identity in this forum, they deserve everything they get.

15
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Girls outpace boys in US IT and engineering test

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Yawn.

Yet another gender based study focused on science and engineering. This continual push to get more females into the science and engineering fields. In all honesty I'm over it.

I've worked in the IT industry now for over 20 years. In all that time I can honestly say the only negativity I have ever seen was based on how crap that person was at their job, not what dangled between their legs.

If there are individuals in an industry,( whatever industry that may be and lets not focus just on the sciences), that are gender biased, then they should be dealt with appropriately. Preferably using a bat swung at great velocity to the back of their head.

Here's a thought let the individual decide what they want to study, what they would like to do for a job/career. Rather than categorising kids, or pushing them into certain areas of education, let their natural aptitudes bubble to the surface and nurture it

</rant>

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Politician claims porn tabs a malware experiment, then finds God

FozzyBear

Surfing porn sites for "research" purposes. It's like reading Playboy for the articles.

15
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Curiosity find Mars' icecaps suck up its atmosphere

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

Re: cold, dry and nasty

I'm willing to kick in a couple of bucks to help make that happen

1
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DARPA wants god-mode attribution platform to pin and predict crime

FozzyBear

"It should also sport algorithms to predict criminal campaign behaviour."

So someone watched minority report over the weekend and thought . That's a cool idea!

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Skygazers: Brace yourselves for a kick in the Aquarids

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

Considering the BS that flies around our office

I can not only confirm that BS can fly at said speed but in much greater volumes than thought possible.

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