* Posts by FozzyBear

427 posts • joined 15 Feb 2010

Page:

Google now mingles everything you've bought with everywhere you've been

FozzyBear
Devil

WOW

Long gone the days of their catch phrase.

"First do no evil"

I've seen shows where individuals, even whole families have turned their backs on the modern world. Rather than being the hill billy rednecks I thought they were. They may just be the smartest people on the planet

1
0

AI smut-finder is now an Android app

FozzyBear
Paris Hilton

finally

An "AI" app I can get behind

2
0

Facebook loves virtual reality so much it just axed its VR film studio

FozzyBear
Coat

Re: future is bright

Gotta wear shades.

0
0

US copyright law shake-up: Days of flinging stuff on the web and waiting for a DMCA may be over

FozzyBear
Alien

Re: Contemporary Hollywood films do not pass the threshold of originality required by copyright

Well if I needed to infect and bring down an alien Computer, Windows OS would certainly be my weapon of choice

2
0

Today's bonkers bug report: Microsoft Edge can't print numbers

FozzyBear
Facepalm

Re: BWA Hahahahahahahhahhhahhahahahha

Well that's one dead from this bug report..

.

.

.

.

.or was that 5 sorry I lost count

26
0

Fire fighters get grinding on London man’s trapped genitalia

FozzyBear

Re: It's amazing.....

ahhh,

so the female version of uncle fester.

Now I need hospital grade mind bleach to get rid of that imagery

6
0

Let's go live to the Uber-Waymo legal war – and see what's happening

FozzyBear
Alien

Allegation of not just patent infringement but corporate espionage. Awesome. Beats the usual patent troll court cases you read about. I may just follow this one , should be entertaining

8
0

Billion-dollar skincare biz scrubs IT makeover, spends days in a daze

FozzyBear
Alien

Yep that one major screw up. All that's left is some poor techie to be blamed for the whole thing and shown the door. So the execs can get back to figuring out how big their end of year bonus will be.

0
0

It's Russian hackers, FBI and Wikileaks wot won it – Hillary Clinton on her devastating election loss

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

Oh stuck in denial. the reset switch must be jammed, it's on the back of her head. Use something heavy like a 2 X 4

4
2

Dell EMC courts HPE sales people with putrid Monty Python parody

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

Ok So HPE is the green knight.

that means IBM must be the "dead" parrot.

Uber is Brian's mum (also willing to get on her knees and go the extra mile)

Microsoft is Pontius Pilate..

I'll let others finish this

3
0

Republicans want IT bloke to take fall for Clinton email brouhaha

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

So as Secretary of state she signs and acknowledges her responsibilities, regarding the safe keeping of the information she has at her fingertips on a day to day basis. A document that unlike a software license agreement someone actually sits down and explains the responsibilities and the penalties involved breaching them.

She then has a private email server setup, no protection, easily hacked. Multiple devices are used to send and receive said highly classified information via that private email server. Once she is caught devices are destroyed, the email server wiped cleaned. Lies about it to everyone that asks. Stated that a black guy said she could. Then stone walled any investigation into her wrong doing using her political clout.

But it is the guy that setup the email server that will be charged. The rich and powerful go free while the worker bee that was doing as asked is left holding the bag.

Others in the US have been locked up for a lot longer for doing a lot less in releasing classified information. Yep that's U.S. justice for you.

11
1

NASA's Cassini snaps pic inside Saturn's ring – peace among the stars

FozzyBear
Pint

I'll raise a glass to all boffins involved. To manage that from over a billion Km's. Awesome results. I look forward to the enhanced pics that come from this

23
0

iPhone lawyers literally compare Apples with Pears in trademark war

FozzyBear

Re: Does anyone remember ...

"Lawyers. Right up there with PR and telephone sanitisers."

I'd still place more value on phone sanitisers than lawyers. In fact I'm trying to think of a lower life form and coming up blank.

2
0

Yahoo!'s Marissa! will! eject! with! $186m!.. $185m!.. $184m!..

FozzyBear
Unhappy

Once again Top execs show they have no fucking clue, ability or competence except when it comes to negotiating what their employment package contains .

6
0

Web celeb product whores told to put on the red light – or else

FozzyBear
Megaphone

Well they are attention seeking whores to begin with, so why wouldn't they pimp themselves out to anyone that is willing to pay them money to try to sell crap.

1
0

Computer games to become medal sport at Asian Games

FozzyBear
Happy

These elite(?) athletes have specific dietary requirements. So now in the lunch room at the athletes village along with fruit and veges will be the front counter from a 7-11 along with a cooler stocked with cans of red bull

0
0

Zuckerberg's absolutely mental: Brain sensors that read YOUR MIND at 100 words a minute

FozzyBear
Trollface

Why All the need for tech to read minds

If Zucky asks I am more than willing to unleash my unfiltered thoughts verbally about him and flopbook

12
0

Silicon Valley tech CEO admits beating software engineer wife, offered just 13 days in the clink

FozzyBear

Re: Beating a woman is infamy

I guess that when true sex equality will be achieved this might change...

Sex equality has absolutely no influence on domestic violence. None. 10 years a cop taught me that domestic violence in most cases is, the perpetrator and the victim are repeating and reinforcing behaviour they experienced as a child and their teenage years. I attended 100's of domestic violence calls over that 10 years

That is why where Police would physically remove the victim and the children from the abusive partner, lodge them in emergency housing ensure counselling services were available for them. Arrest the offender, Refuse bail and then find out they were released on bail by the courts the next day. Issue domestic violence orders restricting their movements or approaching the victim. Come court day for the assault, the victim will refuse to give evidence and therefore the matter is thrown out and no conviction recorded. In the mean time on Friday night you are called back to the same address to find the victim has moved back in with the offender days before and the pattern of abuse and victimisation is repeating again.

Rinse and repeat as many times as you care to.

The cycle of domestic violence cannot be broken unless the victim and/or offender wish it broken. Seeking the help to make that happen.

The efforts of the police, the restrictions imposed by the courts are only a temporary fix.

The human stain in this report should be locked up, but breaking the chain means he needs to be enrolled in a program to deal with his abuse patterns. Otherwise, 30 days or 5 years in lock up, doesn't matter he will only repeat the violence when he is released.

6
0

Australia scraps temporary visas for skilled workers

FozzyBear
Facepalm

My Take

Unfortunately Australia seems to follow America blindly when it comes to politics. Pauline Hanson has been growing in her political power and most of that is due to Trump winning. A lot of trump's rhetoric has been Pauline hanson's stance for years now.

Maladjusted Turnbull (the wanker that he is) is seeing the writing on the wall. No way he will win the next election. He is simply trying to appeal to the masses out there and gain political brownie points.

The next you will hear is that Australia will build a great wall to keep out all the boat people.

4
0

Zuckerberg: Escape from the real world into my goofy make-believe science-fiction fantasy

FozzyBear
Facepalm

Might I suggest

That Zucky tests this by taking a virtual nature walk in the forest near a very real cliff.

6
0

BT's spam blocker IDs accident claims as top nuisance call

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Re: The only real solution

Read a book recently "Daemon" The authors solution to scammers and their ilk , consisted of a coordinated mass killing of all involved.

The more I think about it, it's the only reasonable solution to the problem. Then again my outlook is somewhat biased due to the half dozen scammer calls I've received this week.

3
0

Half-baked security: Hackers can hijack your smart Aga oven 'with a text message'

FozzyBear

El Reg asked Aga if it was going to take this advice, and we've yet to get a substantive response.

Sorry El Reg they are currently busy speaking with the fire department after a number of their new, totally cool (or should that be hot), remote controlled ovens spontaneously caught fire

5
0

Windows 10 Creators Update general rollout begins with a privacy dialogue

FozzyBear
Devil

I am waiting for a BOFH or another truly malevolent mind to figure how we can all turn this data gathering to our advantage.

I'd personally approve of any system which would make a microslop employee instantly barf into their keyboard if they saw the browsing history

1
1

Who really gives a toss if it's agile or not?

FozzyBear
Alien

Re: 'What's Real and What's for Sale'...

I was told in my earlier years by a Developer.

For any project you can have it

Cheap, (On Budget)

Good, (On spec)

Quick.( On time)

Pick two of the three and only two. It doesn't which way you pick, you're fucked on the third. Doesn't matter about methodology, doesn't matter about requirements or project manglement. You are screwed on the third and the great news is, is that the level of the reaming you get scales with the size of the project.

After almost 20 years in the industry this has held true.

4
0

Schneider Electric still shipping passwords in firmware

FozzyBear
Devil

Forget the needle

Use a jackhammer to etch that Warning on the developers eye.

Should drive the point home

0
0

Cambridge Analytica arrives in Australia to STEAL our democracy!

FozzyBear
Flame

To All Aussie political parties

Here's a fucking idea.

Rather than of engaging companies like this to help you win the election and pissing more of the taxpayers money against the wall. How about you actually do something in the nations interests. You know like you're supposed to do.

Stop pandering to the special interest groups. Stop vomiting statements you think the public wants to hear or that you think will win you brownie points or you think will get you reelected. You make a promise fucking keep it

Why is it in politics the scum and clueless always rises to the top.

2
0

Stop us if you've heard this one before: IBM sheds more workers – this time, tech sales

FozzyBear
Devil

I'll guarantee that if you do a headcount now , the beancounter and Human Refuse departments will probably have the largest headcounts. Sorry state for a so called tech company.

Shame IBM isn't in palliative care at the moment and 'could' be saved. Unfortunately, those in the "C" suite don't want to put in the effort to save it, the easy path for them is to harvest the organs so they can collect their bonuses.

1
0

UK cops arrest 20-year-old on suspicion of blackmail and hacking

FozzyBear

The English language was used in this article? Interesting.

0
0

Microsoft wants screaming Windows fans, not just users

FozzyBear
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Never had an issue...

Never had an issue...

Whilst the device was turned off.

0
1

Racist Tesla staff drilled my buttocks, claims employee in lawsuit

FozzyBear
Unhappy

It is a rare occasion when you get both sides of the story. Rarer still, the truth. Unfortunately that was buried long ago to protect one or both parties involved.

3
0

Pirate of the Caribbean to play Hacker of the Caribbean

FozzyBear
Windows

In all honesty to get a proper depiction of him on screen you will need one hell of a character actor. or the craziest SOB they have in the local mental health hospital.

6
0

Australia bins safe harbour, presses ahead with Minister-as-NetAdmin plan

FozzyBear
Pirate

Whilst everyone is bagging trump.

Along comes Brandis, who has achieved a new level of fucked up, delusional, power hungry,self absorbed craziness. Seriously speed balling coke, ice and pcp with shaved glass still wouldn't reach the his level of lunacy

8
0

MI5 man to steer GCHQ as Trump wiretapping saga continues

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

During the primary elections this site reported that Mcafee would be running for president. I commented that if he won at least the news would be entertaining to watch.

I would like to retract that comment. I was wrong. Trump is WAY more entertaining.

The way things are going I can only hope that we soon see an all in brawl between the politicians and the jornos on the white house lawn. Now THAT would be entertainment.

On second thought why wait. Can I get a Playmobil reconstruction, with Jakety sax as the background music

1
0

WWE star's swiped sex snaps survey spam snares selfie sickos

FozzyBear
Devil

And on the right of my screen while reading the article

one ad

"How older guys are lasting longer at the gym"

Can't escape the click bait

6
0

60 slow-mo A-bomb test videos explode onto YouTube

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

Thanks

I've saved the links and reading suggestions from above.

I have an uneasy feeling that I wont make it into work if I start reading this material on the train.

2
0

Dungeons & Dragons finally going digital

FozzyBear
Happy

Sounds like it's a Portal of annihilation to me.

I'm old school. Paper, pencil and splat book. Add a six pack of beer of choice, great mates and I'm set for the afternoon. We are have a house rule all mobile devices into a bowl, first to check or attempt to check the device buys the beers next time.

10
0

Tech titan pals back up Google after 'foreign server data' FBI warrant ruling

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Team America

World Police.

Fuck Yeah!

4
0

'Baby, I know your database needs upgrades tonight'

FozzyBear
Alien

The drugs the marketing department use must be pharmaceutical grade hallucinogens. It is the only rational reason I can think of that they thought this would be a great idea

2
0

Stop the press: Journos not happy losing jobs to journo bots, say journos

FozzyBear
Flame

"Most journalists agreed that robot-churned copy lacked depth, creativity, and complexity compared to articles by experienced human journalists."

In other words it reported the facts as they were and didn't include biased opinionated crap. Or it didn't smear the facts to the point that the article resembles the news in name only.

Whatever happened to reporting the news of the day factually and allowing the reader to form their own opinion, you know like journalists as supposed to do.

4
2

Pack your bags! NASA spots SEVEN nearby Earth-sized alien worlds

FozzyBear
Mushroom

Re: Tides and stuff

"Isn't part of the current theory of why advanced life evolved here "

Considering society today with the bigotry, wars, religious fanaticism and cults, "our" love of social media, reality TV shows, soap operas. Economic markets that are not economic. Leaders who can't lead, managers who can't manage. Politics worldwide that enables the incompetent to rise to the top and where ignorance is no barrier to bending policies and laws to your viewpoint.

The argument can be made that it still hasn't.

1
0

IBM to UK staff: Get ready for another game of musical chairs

FozzyBear
Devil

Is anyone really surprised nowadays

As previous comments have noted the top execs are really only interested in making their annual bonuses and jumping ship before it all turns to custard.

Until a mind shift is made doing away with the annual bonus scheme this will continue. If execs want to be paid millions to manage then tie the bastards into a bonus scheme that can't be manipulated by fiddling figures on a spreadhseet

4
0

Dirty data, flogged cores: YES, Microsoft SQL Server R Services has its positives

FozzyBear
Devil

Anyone

That attaches R or other analytical services directly to their production databases should be shot, drawn and quartered, stabbed, poisoned, drowned, impaled, tortured and then finally their tattered remains hung above the entry to the IT department as a warning to others

And I hope everyone recognises the restraint I have shown in the punishments that should be inflicted on the individual

1
0

Australia wants to jail infosec researchers for pointing out dodgy data

FozzyBear
Black Helicopters

Brandis

This man is in serious need of an arse kicking.

19
0

Secret HPE letter tells sales team and partners to keep selling Arista 'confidently'

FozzyBear
Paris Hilton

HPE and Arista maybe bed mates at the moment. But if IT business history tells us anything HPE will be sneaking out of the room before the afterglow has subsided

0
0

AU$240m went up in smoke on failed school portal project

FozzyBear
Mushroom

warned it might make a corruption finding in its investigation.

Seriously! Is there any doubt.

Or is this going to be the usual government fubar. Where wasting hundreds of millions in dollars of tax payers money through incompetence, greed, and corruption is swept under the carpet.

0
0

Trump signs 'no privacy for non-Americans' order – what does that mean for rest of us?

FozzyBear
Joke

Re: Trump has become more deranged

I am waiting for the day when someone will actually start shooting at the trump, for no other reason other than so I can hear the Secret service yell Donald DUCK!

51
5

HP Inc recalls 101,000 laptop batteries before they halt and catch fire

FozzyBear
Flame

Missed marketing opportunity

HP Laptops

"Keep your employees chained to the desk with our new range of laptops with integrated cook tops. Your employees can now work and cook their morning breakfast or keep their lunch warm Even less excuses from being away from their desks.

* Fire extinguishers sold separately

I'm sure tops execs would view this as a great idea.

0
0

Furby Rickroll demo: What fresh hell is this?

FozzyBear
Thumb Up

Friggin awesome

I will from now on, instead of the standard playmobile reconstruction, request a furby hack. Need a new icon now too.

2
0

Western Union coughs up $586m for turning a blind eye to fraudsters

FozzyBear
Unhappy

and the senior execs escape the possibility of jail. Good for them, retain the incentives they have earned and make the company itself pay out the fines. We wouldn't want them to downgrade to a BMW 5 series that just wouldn't be ethical.

1
0

Resistence is futile: HPE must face Oracle over Solaris IP

FozzyBear

Re: Really??

The problem with that is, these companies don't want to innovate anymore. they just lay in wait for the next startup that does something interesting, buy it up, re badge it as their own and rake in the profits. The lawyers, who have all the reasoning of a group of guard dogs on meth, then attack anyone that even remotely attacks their profits/turf.

3
0

Page:

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017