* Posts by FozzyBear

660 posts • joined 15 Feb 2010

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Telstra reveals radical restructure plan

FozzyBear
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Alien

Whenever I hear about Telstra I always imagine Mr Magoo types in the C suite. Bumbling around blinding but somehow at year end somehow still able to turn a profit, in spite of the the carnage they leave behind.

Sort of describes most of the big tech companies as well I guess

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Azure admins free to sync their teeth into database-spreader tool

FozzyBear
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Facepalm

By pointing applications at their local copy of the database, Microsoft reckons that access time and responsiveness will be improved significantly and latency and connection failures reduced.

So, Microsoft, what you are saying, is that cloud based solutions are a crappy alternative to managing your data on your own network. Good to know. Thanks

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'No, we are not rewriting Office in JavaScript' and other Microsoft tales

FozzyBear
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Devil

Re: Emacs

Well that explains why my dusty tome on Lisp Programming starts to weep blood every time I hit a Lambda Expression error.

Now if I can only figure out how to get it to possess the cowboy .net programmer in the office I'll be happy.

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Computer Misuse Act charge against British judge thrown out

FozzyBear
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Re: So in summary

That's one interpretation. The other realistic scenario is that she accessed the files out of curiosity, even though she knows she is not allowed, even though she knows she's breaking the law. Only after being caught did she provide that argument to provide an air of legitimise. The simple fact is if she wanted to ensure no mistrial due to prior or personal knowledge. A 5 minute phone call to the Court house administrative staff would have sufficient. They probably have specific processes to follow in situations like these. Instead she trawled through case files and court documents with impunity

If any other official had done a similar thing, or accessed family or friends records even out of curiosity, particularly a Police officer would the courts have returned the same results? Or would there have been a push for a trail and imprisonment recommended to send a message to others? If so , then why does her being a judge become the exception to the rule.

Due to this decision every Police Officer, judicial official, sheriff and certain JP's now have a legal argument if ever caught. Likewise, the defence in this case have a whole raft of technical legal arguments that they are now armed thanks to her interference.

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Men are officially the worst… top-level domain

FozzyBear
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Black Helicopters

What are their metrics in classifying them as bad. If disservice to humanity is part of that then they missed

.gov

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New York State is trying to ban 'deepfakes' and Hollywood isn't happy

FozzyBear
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Devil

Unless there is a version of the black swan scene but with trump and Un faces then I call this fake news.

I'll now leave you with that imagery

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WannaCry reverse-engineer Marcus Hutchins hit with fresh charges

FozzyBear
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Holmes

Re: Who do you trust?

@vulcan95.

No I am saying that adding a charge of lying to Police is one of those charges that are VERY easy to prove in court. It is a back up charge, a safety net for the prosecution. In A similar scenario where a person is charged with Murder 1st degree and manslaughter. The Murder charge has a higher burden of prove, therefore the manslaughter charge is added as a back up charge. During the trial if you can prove the defendant killed the victim but cannot prove premeditation the defendant would walk a free person if only charged with Murder 1st Degree. The Manslaughter charge is a backup, therefore the defendant would be found not guilty or murder but guilty of manslaughter

Similar scenario here, adding this charge this late in the game means they realise they are highly likely to lose at trail on the existing charges, this charge being so easy to prove in court saves the prosecution of possibility of a civil suit

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FozzyBear
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Black Helicopters

Re: Who do you trust?

Yep Ok I know where this is going.

When law enforcement add a charge of "knowingly deceived or make false statement or lie to.. Police". There are only two circumstances this happens. The first is the police wasted an extraordinary amount of time investigating a bullshit complaint from an individual and they are now charging the individual that made the complaint.

The second is, it is known as a back up charge. A charge added to the original list of offences, which they know that will get thrown out of court and crucified by the magistrate. Leaving them open to a civil suit of false prosecution. The Back up charge is a catch all. Inevitably the person they charge is found guilty or plea guilty to it whilst all the original charges are dropped **. They cop a deferred sentence, the victim actually walking away thinking they are a winner.

All the while the cops are walking away having dodged a bullet, a grilling from the court. A massive law suit and also possibly being prosecuted themselves for abuse of power (illegal arrest/detention) .

** In Australia you cannot proceed with a law suit if you were found guilty of just one offence in the list of charges that resulted from the original arrest. Well you can but you automatically lose.

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Japanese fashion puts the oo-er into trousers

FozzyBear
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Gimp

Re: How does it "work"?

It's got a zip behind it as well.

An open zipper and your block and tackle dangling through it. Your just asking for a world of hurt

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John McAfee plans 2020 presidential tilt

FozzyBear
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Alien

I commented on his 2016 plan to run, that whilst he maybe crazier than some asylum inmates, it would at least make for entertaining news coverage.

Then trump won and I am thinking that Mcafee needs to up his game, cause the last 18 months with trump at the helm has been an entertaining ride

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Nadella tells worried GitHub devs: Judge us by our actions

FozzyBear
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Re: Future

When chasing another dollar. No!

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Ex-US pres Bill Clinton has written a cyber-attack pulp thriller. With James Patterson. Really

FozzyBear
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Devil

Yep like everyone else my mind went into meltdown at the mere thought of reading this.

However, I am an evil bastard. So that you can continue the journey into utter despair.

I want to see this made into a movie

Director : Michael Bay

Starring the main cast from the twilight series (Couldn't even force myself to google who they are)

Gerard Butler can make an appearance

I'll leave you to other horrid picks for parts in the movie

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Facebook finally fully embraces GDPR – Generally Derailing Pages Recklessly

FozzyBear
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Happy

I was wondering why my torrents were running faster today.

I good percentage of the population was unable to post or watch cat videos

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Foolish foodies duped into thinking Greggs salads are posh nosh

FozzyBear
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Happy

Re: the queue to punch this guy...

Yep from the whole article it was that wankers comment that got me. Though I was thinking more along the line of forced sterilisation to ensure his defective genes cannot pollute the gene pool. A punching queue does bring an immediate sense of satisfaction.

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Australia’s SigInt spooks may be turned inwards after all

FozzyBear
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Big Brother

Sounds like someone is trying to build their own little empire. Hoover, oops I mean, Dutton needs to concentrate on the original mandate of the Aus Sigint.

If the child abuse example is the best he has to justify this sort of internal intrusion. I am seriously concerned about what are his real plans. Or is this just the next step in nanny state implementation

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Grilled over failed DoE project, Turnbull's Transformers turn turtle

FozzyBear
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Flame

Re: Two points

Turnball < retching sound>

The suit that's embarrassing Australia on a global scale. Seriously can't we just get a Monkey that masturbates in public as our new PM. It would be orders of magnitude less embarrassing than that retard.

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FozzyBear
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Flame

Two points

So the DTA is just another level bureaucracy and project management.

Yep that's going to always end well, because what every IT project needs is a bunch of fucking halfwits with less than no idea telling you how to do something. So they can either cover themselves in glory if it succeeds or distance themselves if it fails

Alexander said as well as the PM's interest, “lots of vendors” are talking to the government about blockchain.

Well of course they are, there is a lot of money to be made selling snake oil

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Windows Notepad fixed after 33 years: Now it finally handles Unix, Mac OS line endings

FozzyBear
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Devil

Awesome

Security holes, patches, data slurping, Ads, Plus all the other things wrong with Win10. But, hey, at least now after 33 years Notepad can recognise unix based files.

And of course this deserves a segment in their Conference. What a leap forward !.

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Windows app makers told to think different – you're Microsoft 365 developers, now

FozzyBear
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Mushroom

Re: JavaScript + AI + Excel = ...

My thoughts were just a little more basic and maybe a bit more pure

A perfect shitstorm to cause even bigger fuck ups in the company, which will take I.T even longer to debug. After which some pimply faced beancounter with an active browser session to "How to write javascript in just 10 hours..." Simply says "whoops"

Seriously Nuke this crap from orbit

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The world is becoming a computer, says CEO of worldwide computer company Microsoft

FozzyBear
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Devil

"We need to develop a set of principles that guide the choices we make because the choices we make are going to define the future," he said.

Nice of them to admit they have been winging it til now.

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Google will vet political ads to ward off Phantom Menace of fake news

FozzyBear
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Megaphone

What's the definition of fake news

"cause to be honest . Unless a Politicians ad contains the following disclaimer it's all fake news

** This political ad was financed by <insert megacorp name here> Therefore, being the lying sack of shit that I am. Everything above is an absolute bullshit. It has been designed to appeal to be greatest number of sheeple in the community to ensure I get elected. After which I will be obliged to betray my morals (though I didn't have any to begin with) and implement all the financiers wishes. No doubt this will lead to blah, blah, blah (sorry wasn't listening to them, I just saw the size of the cheque and didn't hear a word they were saying. I just signed on the bottom line and sold my soul (again, not sure I had one to begin with).

Their plans will no doubt lead to jobs (in India) and greater resources to be invested back into the business and community (the executives get larger bonuses to be invested in their own wealth portfolio and another holiday home in some low tax threshold country)

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Australian government plans to do a Facebook on citizens' data

FozzyBear
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IT Angle

“our nation's capacity to remain competitive in the modern, global economy relies on our ability to harness the power of our nation’s data”.

Bullshit.

The prosperity of a nation is not determined to how well you can mine data. It is reliant on a group of competent elected officials who are able to put into place efficient & effective trade, tax, education, health and support mechanisms. Mechanisms that designed to improve the nation not win elections.

So seriously Mr Turnball. When your government talks about funding this initiative. Which we know you will royally screw up (see any prior initiative from the digital transformation Office). Before sinking $65Mil and the hundreds of millions due to budget blowouts. Might I suggest you roll up the reams of paper you wasted on this and ram it up your arse with a sandpaper dildo.

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Failbreak: Bloke gets seven years in the clink for trying to hack his friend out of jail

FozzyBear
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Happy

Re: He followed rule 1 of social engineering

Depending on how switched on the cops were, responding with

" Trying to hack into the County Jail Systems to get my buddy outta gaol early"

may have received the same response.

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I spy with my little eye ... a quantum drum with TRILLIONS of atoms

FozzyBear
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Pint

entanglement was maintained for nearly 30 minutes.

On objects that large! Yeah that deserves a couple of these -->

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Academics: Shutting down Facebook API damages research, oversight, competition

FozzyBear
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Happy

Re: Burn it.

@forthisnotdead

I admire your restraint.

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FozzyBear
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Big Brother

"That gateway must be kept open for any independent, public-interest researchers around the world, as long as they adhere to the strict ethical standards of scholarly research."

Dear Mr Bruns,

I am quite certain that in days gone by academics requested my inclusion in a study. Outlining the focus of their research, I then had a choice whether I would be part of the study or not. Therefore, are you sure you are not confusing public interest with self interest. Being locked out of a limitless swamp of data of unwitting participants. It seems you are conveniently side stepping those "strict ethical standards" you mentioned.

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In a touching Monty Python tribute today, Microsoft's Office 365 makes everything spam

FozzyBear
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Happy

Are we suggesting Office 365 is THE dead parrot

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Yay, you've won your Fitbit lawsuit, folks. But, lawyers, about those filet mignon expenses...

FozzyBear
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Holmes

A money grabbing ambulance chasing lawyer, wanting more money. Well there's a shocker!

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You're a govt official. You accidentally slap personal info on the web. Quick, blame a kid!

FozzyBear
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Alien

Re: Good Ol' Government Mentality

@Handleoclast

I was looking for an analogy to a semi sentient life form that fucks up anything it touches. a-la Swedish chef or the drummer animal.

Unfortunately, since the first posting I have had to deal with two separate government departments. As a result, I now have to revise my initial assessment to something more realistic. The closest I've come is some sort of primordial sludge that has accidentally burped itself out from underneath the excrement of some other single celled organism.

My sincerest apologies to obviously more intelligent Muppet's, Please don't send Miss Piggy in retribution

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FozzyBear
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Black Helicopters

Good Ol' Government Mentality

If you break the law you will be arrested and punished.

If we break the law you will be arrested and punished

When we make embarrassing mistakes. You will be arrested and punished

Friggin' muppets the lot of them !!!

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Cambridge Analytica's ex-CEO decides not to front UK Parliamentary Committee again

FozzyBear
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Pirate

“There is therefore no legal reason why Mr Nix cannot appear. "

What you expected him to reappear out of the goodness of his heart.

With no charges, summons or subpoena

There is no legal reason for him to appear.

Gez. Stop whining and issue a summons already. Better still open an active investigation on him and let the police crawl through his professional and personal life. Why do these politicians think that they have the investigative credentials of a seasoned detective.

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Autonomy pulled wool over Brit finance panel's eyes, US court told

FozzyBear
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This highlights how poorly the independent auditors did their job. Shortfalls in reported revenue in the millions should have leapt off the page.

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Patch or ditch Adobe Flash: Exploit on sale, booby-trapped Office docs spotted in the wild

FozzyBear
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Gimp

IT security bod I know once likened using flash to jumping the wall to a high security prison dropping your pants, bending over and yelling "Come get it boys".

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Facebook: Look at our latest bug bounty that proves we're serious!

FozzyBear
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Black Helicopters

The problem now is , is that Zuk probably (read as definitely) has a dossier on those senators that would make the CIA cry.

In a previous life as a criminal analyst the hardest part was building a dossier on a criminal network based on credible information. that meant surveillance, if you could get it, call records, plus other sources. It was grunt work and slow to build those associations.

Facebook has that information coming to them and more. Some people are concerned as a result of the latest revelations of facebooks data slurping. Everyone really should be paranoid and terrified

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They forked this one up: Microsoft modifies open-source code, blows hole in Windows Defender

FozzyBear
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Happy

Damn thought you were talking about exchange server. My bad

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FozzyBear
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Coffee/keyboard

Honestly the day Micro$hit makes a product that doesn't suck is the day they start making vacuum cleaners

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Facebook want us to believe banning Putin's troll army safeguards Russian democracy

FozzyBear
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Facepalm

Re: Marketing 101 here...

I think it's safe to say anything f*ckberg says is bullshit

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Need a needle in an artery? Move over, doc, there's an app for that

FozzyBear
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Flame

It appears many doctors need as much help as possible nowadays, for even the most basic examinations. My dad fell 6 meters at a work site some years ago. Waking up in hospital, they did a some tests and x-rays. The attending doctor released my dad the same day saying , very lucky indeed just some bruising and other soft tissue damage.

Ignoring the obvious concussion and complaint of severe headache, not to mention the 3 broken ribs and the hair line fracture to the right wrist. Lucky indeed.

Anything that can compensate for that level of ignorance, incompetence or laziness is a good thing

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Do(ug)h! Half-baked security at Panera Bread spills customer data

FozzyBear
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Coat

Well they kneaded the sysadmin time to rest before he could rise to the occasion

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Grindr: Yeah, we shared your HIV status info with other companies – but we didn't charge them!

FozzyBear
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Happy

Unfortunately not me just like Anonymous Coward above I'd get my hair back. Oh and plus my sanity, I miss that sometimes

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FozzyBear
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Alert

Remember the good ol' days when the internet was used for sharing information and "B" grade porn. Where the only concept of social media was Usenet or the latter IRC. Where the only thing you had to worry about was getting involved in a flame war or being called a usenet kitten

I miss those days. can someone please turn back the clock about 20 years, that'll be great

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Who had Intel in the 'discrimination lawsuit' pool? Congratulations

FozzyBear
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Pirate

Well if the facts in the article are correct and there are no other circumstances that would legitimately warrant a reduced salary. I would say Ms Wong

Take them for everything you can

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Please no Basic Instinct flashing, HPE legal eagles warn staffers

FozzyBear
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Devil

Ironically,Utilising powerpoint slides that were crammed with the whole text of the new "Code of practice". It was presented by a members of the legal team All dressed in drab grey business suits. Delivered in a dead pan monotone voice

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Astro-boffins find new type of super-fast supernova

FozzyBear
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Flame

Re: So its not going out in a new way its just lighting its last fart.

So it's a Kenny Death event

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You'll like this: Facebook probed by US watchdog amid privacy storm

FozzyBear
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Black Helicopters

Interesting. Closed Door proceedings. The FCC hosts the "interrogation" where NSA, CIA, FBI and other 3 letter federal departments complain that facebook promised to provide all information available, but failed to tell them about the call and message metadata.

I think I'll join the other commentators and start wearing a tin foil hat

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Cambridge Analytica CEO suspended – and that's not even the worst news for them today

FozzyBear
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Devil

Re: Shame.

@ Sabroni

I did think it through. Hence the obvious restraint in my comments

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FozzyBear
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Alien

Re: Shame.

Classifying this group of gutter dwelling, bottom feeding, shallow end of the gene pool upright mammals as Human is somewhat alarming.

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Commonwealth Games are just the ticket for Facebook

FozzyBear
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Facepalm

Or they could put their phones away and watch the events

My apologies for the obvious common sense approach

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Hate to add to the wanky jargon – but your digital transformation is actually a bolt-on

FozzyBear
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IT Angle

Which is where those IT consultants (very loosely defined) who have absolutely no moral centre will come in. Charge a fortune to over promise under deliver on a project Then point the finger at the IT teams as the cause of the failure of the project.

Ask the hard questions like Why is this a Digital transformation with so many consultants when if you boil it down it is basically a new server with a few extra reports being feed through the BI portal. You get the condescending reply that doesn't answer the question, along the smarmy smirk that you just want to ram a jackhammer into their face and hit the trigger until you hit bedrock.

Slimy gits.

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Transport for NSW scrambles to patch servers missing fixes released in 2007

FozzyBear
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Flame

No updates since 2007. Nice it's not like these systems, control switching on the rails, traffic and monitor progress of trains across the network. Timetables, Comms and maintenance schedules.

Oh wait....

Interesting considering they invested heavily to revamp the the systems that log lateness of trains at various stops and the associated reporting. Anything short of a derailment is now considered Act of god and therefore outside of their control. Wouldn't want to interfere with the directors and senior executives getting their yearly bonus now would we?

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