* Posts by Anonymous South African Coward

1632 posts • joined 6 Jan 2010

Azure running out of internets in UK South, starts rationing VMs

Anonymous South African Coward
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That's cloud computing for you!

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Trump wants to work with Russia on infosec. Security experts: lol no

Anonymous South African Coward
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Is Putin good at playing poker?

And Trump?

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People hate hot-desking. Google thinks they’ll love hot-Chromebooking

Anonymous South African Coward
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In the sight of other men, return your Chromebook.

But, when alone, grabbeth it when you can.

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You wanna be an alpha... tester of The Register's redesign? Step this way

Anonymous South African Coward
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Looks good, no grumbles from my side.

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Microsoft's TextWorld gives AI a Zork-like challenge

Anonymous South African Coward
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And Jinxter's on its way...

https://strandgames.com/

Enjoy The Pawn and The Guild of Thieves in the meantime.

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Tech team trapped in data centre as hypoxic gas flooded in. Again

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: 30 Seconds to comply...

Luckily I was with someone when the lights on one end wall started flashing and a bell rang - it was just to let the site engineer know his desk phone was ringing in his office outside the hall.

Downloaded some brownware when that happened? :)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Reverting to type?

Who left a ladder precariously propped by the door (plus emergency buttons)?

The PFY?

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: New version of Cluedo

But it is always the BOFH/PFY that does it...

OTOH, the game could be to discover who gets the blame...

Something like that...

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Not good stuff!

Gives new meaning to "Vaping Halon".

And, yup, it's a BOFH eppysode.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: New version of Cluedo

And I think you're on to something.

What about designing and selling an actual BOFH/PFY game a la Cluedo?

The Boss in the Filing room with the Faulty CattleProd.

Sharon in the Company Canteen with the Listeriosis Viennas. :)

The Janitor in the Stairway with the PFY's patented slippery stuff.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Pint

Re: Hasn't halon been banned or something in the '90s?

Upvoted for the BOFH reference.

And have one (sans laxatives)

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Scam alert: No, hackers don't have webcam vids of you enjoying p0rno. Don't give them any $$s

Anonymous South African Coward
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Trollface

So want to sendspam them with emails saying "COME AT ME BRO"...

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No, seriously, why are you holding your phone like that?

Anonymous South African Coward
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/blows raspberries

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Crumbs. Apple has tweaked the MacBook Pro keyboard

Anonymous South African Coward
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Cookie Monster need to review one ASAP.

While munching on cookies.

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Dudes. Blockchain. In a phone. It's gonna smash the 'commoditization of humanity' or something

Anonymous South African Coward
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Blockchain = Bollockschain :)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Obligatory Dilbert

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What can $10 stretch to these days? Lunch... or access to international airport security systems

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: I was "hacked" via RDP

I had a discussion once about the concept of doubling the time between login attempts:

start with a 1 second re-try and double the time for every wrong login attempt. Has anybody ever implemented this?

That's what a good BOFH would do

WITH THE ADDITION of a "bandwidth throttle" the more failed attempts, the more that specific IP or connection will be throttled.

Hopefully the attacker will give up in despair after increasing timeouts and a connection that get progressively slower.

Come to think of it, if it was possible to do a GPO where your timeout increases the more incorrect passwords you type, I will implement it most definitely.

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Geoboffins spot hundreds of ghost dunes on Mars

Anonymous South African Coward
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"I am the Kwisawtz Haderach. That is reason enough"...

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AAAAAAAAAA! You'll scream when you see how easy it is to pwn unpatched HPE servers

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: MS did it with NT too

Hehehe

Used Teardrop against a Win95 PC - and the hard drive crashed when I teardropped it.

Lovely :D

Techie using the PC was very upset, but he did not know who b0rked his PC.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Will "ohsh**ohsh**wegonnadiewegonnadie" also work?

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Tired sysadmin plugged cable into wrong port, unleashed a 'virus'

Anonymous South African Coward
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Trollface

"Documentation walked..." and what then?

Maybe you got interrupted by a packet storm?

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Confessed? Really?

Intermittent problems are the shiz, yo! Gotta love these as they make you swear for hours on end.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Remote site phoned early one morning, network was down. Toddled all the way over (1hr drive)

Had to play the usual game of "Hunt-the-Terminator" but found none. Went round the site a second, then a third time.

Found two terminators hidden neatly into a recessed conduit in the floor, and an extra T-piece. Disconnected the coax cable from t-piece, plugged in the one terminator, added the "spare" T-piece and second terminator to the other cable and voila.

I'm just glad coax networks have gone the way of the dodo.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Had a rogue D-Stink device on my network doshing out DHCP packets.

The problem got resolved when the wrong firmware got uploaded to it by accident.

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Snooping passwords from literally hot keys, China's AK-47 laser, malware, and more

Anonymous South African Coward
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Trollface

Botswana's practically next door to us.

Mebbe I should start my own scamming biz up....

And scam the ne'er-do-wells should they land here....

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And in current affairs: Rogue raccoon blacks out city power grid after shocking misstep

Anonymous South African Coward
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Can a 'coon (dead or fried) have Linux installed on it?

http://strangehorizons.com/non-fiction/articles/installing-linux-on-a-dead-badger-users-notes/

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Are you SURE it's dead?

Upvoted for that reference!

I have no prosthetic limbs yet.

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AI bots suck at marking written essays, not too shabby at old Atari games, and more...

Anonymous South African Coward
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"History by mimic has not, and presumably never will be precipitously but blithely ensconced. Society will always encompass imaginativeness; many of scrutinizations but a few for an amanuensis. The perjured imaginativeness lies in the area of theory of knowledge but also the field of literature. Instead of enthralling the analysis, grounds constitutes both a disparaging quip and a diligent explanation."

Whut?? 0 out of 100 for you, then.

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Japanese cryptominer slapped with suspended sentence

Anonymous South African Coward
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Maybe I can *cough* "distribute" a miner on my company's laptops/servers etc... *cough* and blame it on an unknown ne'er-do-well when the dastardly miners are uncovered...

Mmmm. Must be the BOFH inside me.

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Sysadmin cracked military PC’s security by reading the manual

Anonymous South African Coward
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Anybody who managed to haxx0r a Dell Sonicwall yet?

Supposedly to be very secure.

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Security guard cost bank millions by hitting emergency Off button

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Big Red Buttons are irresistible!

Obligatory request for a Sir Pterry icon.

Else we'll send Detritus, Granny Weatherwax and Foul Ole Ron over to have a nice talk with youse about that icon we've requested.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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That's an easy one to fix. Unauthorised equipment ends up in the bin.

Had a rogue DHCP server on my LAN once.

Investigated.

Found it was some sort of D-Stink P-O-S which somebody's using as a switch.

It got the wrong firmware uploaded somehow, and ceased to function.

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ZX Spectrum reboot firm boss delays director vote date again

Anonymous South African Coward
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Trollface

Do you think Monty Python will do a dead horse skit?

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Dear Samsung mobe owners: It may leak your private pics to randoms

Anonymous South African Coward
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Sagsmug.

So glad I decided not to use their products anymore.

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The Notch contagion is spreading slower than phone experts thought

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: End game

Terminator and Skynet?

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RIP Peter Firmin: Clangers creator dies aged 89

Anonymous South African Coward
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Postman Pat and his black and white c*t...

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Anonymous South African Coward
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I dimly remembered that Clangers was also aired on our local SABC back yonkers ago when I was a wee tyke...

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Google weeps as its home state of California passes its own GDPR

Anonymous South African Coward
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We are Borg.

Resistance is Fut>KZERRRRT<

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Automated payment machines do NOT work the same all over the world – as I found out

Anonymous South African Coward
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Here in SA you will need to wait for an attendant to come and fill your car for you.

They have some sort of electronic key fob on the pump which need to be triggered by its counterpart which the attendant have on his person. (Think it is meant to stop theft of fuel).

So you rock up, attendant activates the pump, and fills you up, then you pay (or drive off if you want to feel lucky). To counter that sort of thing, all fuel stations have cameras all over the place.

And currently we're paying over R15 for a litre of engine juice. :(

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Drug cops stopped techie's upgrade to question him for hours. About everything

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Entering New Zealand

ISO-whatever's just for show. You never know what things are really happening behind the scenes.

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The butterfly defect: MacBook keys wrecked by single grain of sand

Anonymous South African Coward
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Thumb Up

El Reg.

Not shy.

Will say it out loud should a product be shoddy.

Good.

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IBM memo to staff: Our CEO Ginni is visiting so please 'act normally!'

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Leave a little present.

The comment about cabbage - reminds me of the time when we scored a lot of free cabbage leaves from our local shop.

Fed it to our chickens who loved it - but the pong when they decided to do their No2 business was another matter entirely.

Never did it again.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Leave a little present.

Bonus points for evacuating the entire building by the power of your air biscuits. :)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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"Should you need private meeting spaces, utilize the 4th floor. DO NOT TOUCH any items or objects you might see around the space, including signage, TVs, chairs, and tables."

Now I'm really curious as to WHY.

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Firefox hooks up with HaveIBeenPwned for account pwnage probe

Anonymous South African Coward
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Trollface

WebExtensions can now hide tabs as well as manage the behavior of the browser when a tab is opened or closed, so you can expect to see exciting new ...

...rickrolling features to pop up all over the place".

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It's getting more and more Azure'd: For Microsoft, sorry seems to be the hardest word

Anonymous South African Coward
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Microsoft slipping its tentacles into every pie all over the world.

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Software changed the world, then died on the first of the month

Anonymous South African Coward
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Little Bobby Tables.

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At last! Apple admits its MacBook Pro butterfly keyboards utterly suck, offers free replacements

Anonymous South African Coward
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Crrrrrrrrr<tap>rrrrrrrrr<tap><tap><tappity><TAP>Apple keyboarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr<tap><tappity><TAP>ds arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr<tap><tap><tappity><TAP><TAP><TAP>e such a paiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii<TAP><TAP><TAP>n to use

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Cops: Autonomous Uber driver may have been streaming The Voice before death crash

Anonymous South African Coward
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And that's why, once you're in a car and driving, your mobile/cellphone/phablet should be stowed away and be left alone for the duration of the trip.

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BOFH: Is everybody ready for the meeting? Grab a crayon – let's get technical

Anonymous South African Coward
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cliffhanger of note

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