* Posts by Alistair

2099 posts • joined 18 May 2007

Careful with the 'virtual hugs' says new FreeBSD Code of Conduct

Alistair
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@ VRH:

How is it I've never seen that ...... Thanks Voland......

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Alistair
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Joke

Re: Oh my fucking gawd/ess ...

@ Jake:

I'd offer you a hug, in hopes that it might make you feel better, but you might be offended, since you project a male image in your online persona, and I project a male online persona also. Not that I assume you're actually male.

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Rock-a-byte, baby: IoT tot-monitoring camera lets miscreants watch 10,000s of kids online

Alistair
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Joke

Re: Silver lining

@Pen-y-gors:

"while doing squishy things with her boyfriend on the sofa"

Much more likely those two will be doing powdery things on the sofa and vapey things on the back porch. 'Shrooms done gone outta style!

And how dare you assume the babysitter's sexuality. That might be her girlfriend, despite the 'stache

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Gemini is shipping and we've got one. This is what it's like

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Far from complete

@Allonymous Coward:

After a quick skim of the forum they have BT1 does *not* appear to be working - although the implication is that it is coming.

1:bluetooth, not bell or british telecom

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A print button? Mmkay. Let's explore WHY you need me to add that

Alistair
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Windows

hive query yields 320 *million* rows of result.

analyst is fine with results, bodges up report.

manager asks "can we get a printout of your source data".

Print that %@#$%@#$% out for 'em

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Hot NAND: Samsung wheels out 30TB SSD monster

Alistair
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Windows

urrrm

lesseee.

7*30TB 3.5" drives in raid10, one hot spare, ZFS and .... (I still think the rebuild time is in the days territory but hell)

I've a raft of apollo 4500's that sport 45 4Tb spinning rust drives. Moving those to 30Tb SSDs would make Hive and Spark look like mainframe class software.....

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If this laptop is so portable, where's the keyboard, huh? HUH?

Alistair
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"mouse device solution" = Trackball!

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Alistair
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Re: classic!

my mom's office way back had 14 of those damned Amstrads.

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FCC inspector general sticks corruption probe into chairman Ajit Pai amid $4bn media merger

Alistair
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Windows

Dammit.

I can normally get into the sport of poking at the Pai. I have earned more than a few upvotes on said sport. For some reason this morning I'm just not on point. I just cannot comprehend how someone in his position, seeing this train coming down the track, can stand there and honestly believe (and I figure he *has* to believe) that they have done nothing wrong. There must be something seriously wrong with the brain of such an individual. And this "wrong", be it disease, or invalid reasoning, or broken logic, or some sort of psychosis seems to be utterly pervasive in politics. Globally, although the Americans seem to make parading it about on stage and trumpetting it to the world a celebration. I suspect my tolerance is running thin again and I need to take a vacation away from human beings.

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BOFH: Turn your server rack hotspot to a server rack notspot

Alistair
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Windows

When your vendor provides

A *full service* set of products, including outsourcing contract work.

Sadly, I'm pretty sure I know Dave. Although, not through his sales work.

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You're decorating it wrong: Apple HomePod gives wood ring of death

Alistair
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Joke

Wait --

its the silicone thing on the bottom what's causing the problem?

turn it upside down?

and. well. yeah -- we're back to that line.

/s

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UK names Russia as source of NotPetya, USA follows suit

Alistair
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Russian was buying yellowcake!

I see that NotPetya will be the WMD of this round of military action.

This *might* not be a wise course of action.........

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Iran: We have defeated evil nuclear-sensing Western lizards!

Alistair
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Windows

Re: @TheOldGuy "But when we arrested them, they said they had come for fishing and were tourists."

I see your Inspector Clouseau and raise you an Agent 86.

I say we put Inspector Clouseau, Agent 86, and Columbo in one movie. Hell, we have the technology, and *someone* out there has $6,000,000 for the project........

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Alistair
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Re: @TheOldGuy "But when we arrested them, they said they had come for fishing and were tourists."

Must dig out one of those old Pink Panther films again

Nope:

Must dig out all of those old Pink Panther films again, but definitely not the newest one.

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Arrrgh! Put down the crisps! 'Ultra-processed' foods linked to cancer!

Alistair
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Windows

Hesus Forking Crispus!

It took me *actually* having to dig down to the "who we are" page before I was able to connect BMJ to British Medical Journal. Keep in mind, am left pondian, and from the *cough* upper 6/10's of the continent, so I am somewhat equipped to make these connections.

That the BMJ has a website that makes it that difficult to connect that particular pair of dots makes me wonder where it is headed.

Now, as for the OMG PROCESSED FUUDZ WILL KILLZ the issue is the hype around anything like this. Mostly I think it comes from some deep seated issue the diagnosticians *and* the publicists have with the current world *period*. I.E. Modern world sucks ass in all sorts of ways, (wars, politics, snowflakes, polarization of the proletariat, 99% vs 1% vs 0.0001%, MS, Oracle, Linux on the Desktop, HP laptops, Lenovo laptops, flavour of the tapwater, colour of the sewage riverwater, sushi rollls, etc etc etc) so if it is relatively modern it must be killing us, lets go back to teh huntard/gathertard cavedweller!

That and the simple fact that if you yell something loud enough, and then point out that the research needs *LOTS* of fine tuning *someone* somewhere will throw lots of money at you to make that tuning in their favour anyhow.

<hmm... I seem to be down a cup of (industrially processed) coffee this morning>

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Magic Leap's staggering VR goggle technology just got even better!

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Are they *all* drinking the same Kool-Aid?

@ Milton:

Thank you for that, I'll be adding Execubicile to the list with Execudont and corporofart.

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Roses are red, Ajit Pai is tickled. Broadband from SpaceX gets him out of a pickle

Alistair
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Windows

well -- for *some* of us.

Personally, with all the sh*t that keeps happening around the world, political and non-political, and given my age, were I to acquire sufficient funds, I'd be inclined to buy a hull of sufficient length and beam that I could live on until the ticker decides to quit. And having a contiguous global internet provider that did not require a physical connection or a tower within 2 miles would work rather well for me at that point.

Finding the right mast would be a separate operation in my books. I've a friend who does 24' racing in the lake, and they're currently arguing with the vendor about the POS they got from them last year. They've a picture of their current mast under load that makes me wonder *when* I'll hear about them being hauled back to shore on a rescue craft. Hopefully that gets sorted before this years re-step.

The idea of being out in the middle of an ocean and not having to deal with the bulk of humanity is looking better every single day.

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Despite the headlines, Rudd's online terror takedown tool is only part of the solution

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Frankly

@cornz:

Yes, but the NFL is broadcast live on TV, you don't need the internet or tor for that.

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Crypto-gurus: Which idiots told the FBI that Feds-only backdoors in encryption are possible?

Alistair
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Windows

FBI to @cryptoboffins

Our sources cannot be identified in order to protect their identities.............................................................................................................................................................

(from massive ridicule by people that actually know what they're talking about).

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Litigants gonna litigate

Alistair
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Windows

Well - my take on this one is the judge basically said

"Yo, legal beagle, you ain't got no leg on this dog, since we done been sayin that sh*t since afore you was waddlin in them there pampers".

But I think he did it with a bit more style.

As for the who borrowed who's lyrics I think he made it clear that since it is in the vernacular *you can't copyright* that sh*t. Which makes it a bit of an interesting point since it appears that there is some of that common sense fungus growing on that judge.

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Alistair
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Pint

Litigants gonna litigate

Judgment here

Not that I really give a crap about copyright over a phrase like playas gonna play, but I do believe that someone on the bench here actually did some solid homework, and managed to slide in a few daggers along the way,

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Pressure mounts on FCC to cough up answers over fake net neutrality comments

Alistair
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Windows

Lesseeee...

Letter to the Federal Communications Commission.

Raises questions about interpreting communications from the public.

mmmmm Hmmmm.

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Roses are red, Kaspersky is blue: 'That ban's unconstitutional!' Boo hoo hoo

Alistair
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Joke

@fluffyBunnyUK:

Yer just jealous that its not easter yet. Yeeesh. Its coming bunny, its coming.

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While Western Union wired customers' money, hackers transferred their personal deets

Alistair
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Windows

I'm going to guess here, you've recently graduated from a "How to secure computers" course and are now working for Amazon, Microsoft or Oracle.

You *do* realize that the global monster corporations have a rule, two people with qualifications, in a corner, writing things, and 2,000 people at minimum possible wage to do the work right?

Us "Old Mans"* are the ones that get called in when the airborne fecal matter impacts the rotary aerators for a very good reason.

________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________

*I'll note that one of the best forensic accountants and network flow analysts I've ever met is both old, and at one time was a man but now is no longer. And for that matter, there are Old Woman types I'll defer to as they have the breadth of experience and knowledge to make even my ego look small.

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OpenSSL alpha adds TLS 1.3 support

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Beer due!

@ Hans1

Easy there cowboy, while I respect your enthusiasm to help get this rolled out, we do want to make note of the key component of both that title and the point of release; OpenSSL alpha. This stuff be sandbox/playtime only in my books. Which is why I'm rejecting a code promotion from an idiot developer who cannot read. This goes nowhere near prod systems yet.

I have a vm or three what will get this, but I'll be kicking this off the Dev host now.

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Alistair
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Re: "Shambling corpse of ancient, shoddy, buggy, crypto shoved towards the grave"

@ Chris King:

You weren't the only one.

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FCC commish gobbles Verizon's phone-locking BS, says it tastes great

Alistair
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Windows

Re: I thought all carriers shared a stolen handset list.

Ummm.

The FCC has nothing to do with the Fraud Management on cell phones. Internationally, carriers share a 'stolen IMEI' listing and are required to collate fraud data to share with other carriers and the financial folks. It is a *huge* cost to the businesses and massively important.

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Blackbird shot down, patent nuked by judge in Cloudflare legal battle

Alistair
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Windows

hmmm. Musical reference?

"Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly"

I believe the blackbird has acquired a broken wing.....

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Data scientist wanted: Must have Python, spontaneity not required

Alistair
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I've recently

Had a discussion with a slave traderrecruiter discussing a project:

required:

5 to 10 years enterprise Systems Operations in Windows/Unix/Linux heterogeneous environment, Masters in Computer Science, "extensive" experience in network configuration and diagnostics, and 3 to 5 years experience in applying high security configurations to windows, linux, unix, and networking equipment. Objective was to rebuild a 700 seat call centre support environment and provide 'rapid datacentre migration tools' to the client.

The offer was $28-$35/hrCA. No overtime, 6 Day weeks, and a 14 week schedule to completion.

I suggested that the Ontario Labour Relations board might like to have a peek at that contract.

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What if I told you that flash drives could do their own processing?

Alistair
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Windows

Urm

Netezza. What ever happened to Netezza........

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NASA budget shock: Climate studies? GTFO. We're making the Moon great again, says Trump

Alistair
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Windows

Re: We don't need no education

Bob:

"With education spending being the HIGHEST IN THE WORLD, and per-dollar performance some of the LOWEST,"

With access to statistics and the ability to both read and do math, you would understand why what you say here is utter tripe. And it would also provide you with the understanding of what is *actually* wrong with the education system in the united states.

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Wow, MIND-BLOWING: Florida Man gets an earful from 'exploding Apple AirPod' bud

Alistair
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Windows

re Motivation.

Partly motivation - especially when the young toughs deadlifting 150lb and acting like they're king kong notice the 40 something pudgy wife type in the mirror deadlifting 200 and change.

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Uber and its 245 million reasons to settle with Google's Waymo

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Shares?

Umm:

" since it's not profitable, the business model has no realistic path to profit, the core app business has no means of preventing competitors from copying it"

And yet Facebook.....

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No sh*t, Sherlock! Bloke suspected of swallowing drug stash keeps colon schtum for 22 DAYS

Alistair
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Re: Fed up with the special treatment criminals are getting

Oh good. They can arrest you and hold you without charge, bail, or contact with the rest of the world then.

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Due to Oracle being Oracle, Eclipse holds poll to rename Java EE (No, it won't be Java McJava Face)

Alistair
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Re: Rosie

sorry;

The only Rosie reference that sticks in my mind is here

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Military techie mangled minicomputer under nose of scary sergeant

Alistair
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Windows

Re: buttons

@ Empty one:

Our mix (one red, one blue, 4 inches apart, left of door, just at hip height, no covers, no labels) was in the primary data centre.

It was suggested that we label the red one "Executive Exit Button" after a certain upper management type hit it not once, but three times over about 6 months. (after which someone got smart and wrapped a case over it)

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Uh-oh! Someone hit the Kalanick button! Uber's fired CEO claims Waymo deal vindicates him

Alistair
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Windows

There are moments in this world

--- I cannot comprehend why this idiot decided to raise his skull over the rim of the pit that he must have been hiding in lately. I rather suspect that the pit is a pothole and he's about to get run over by a self driving electric vehicle.

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Remember the Yorkie pizza horror? Here's who won our exclusive Reg merch...

Alistair
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Pint

Re: Gravy/Chips issues.

@jake:

Clearly you've not been down hill skiing in -35C weather, and then had the pure joy of warming yourself from one end to the other with the glorious cheesy deliciousness of poutine. This makes me sad for you.

Have a beer to cheer up with.

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Alistair
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Re: loud, aggressive porter

@ arctic_haze:

Summat liek Dis

Sadly I can't find a link to the Porter I fell in love with from GLB, although I suspect it may have been a single run for halloween three years ago.

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Alistair
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Windows

Gravy/Chips issues.

What are you talking about.

Gravy doesn't go on the chips.

The chips are on the bottom.

The curds are in the middle.

The damn gravy goes on the fresh cheese curds. It is the best way to melt them over the chips.

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Alistair
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Pint

Oh my

Why .... Thank you .......

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MY GOD, IT'S FULL OF CARS: SpaceX parks a Tesla in orbit (just don't mention the barge)

Alistair
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Re: Great Headline, Register

"Pretty sure "my god, it's full of stars" doesn't actually feature in the film"

I have copies of both. It features in both.

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Alistair
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Re: Great Headline, Register

Hence my comment re: Debating what is or is not 'Space Opera'

From the Wikipedia entry for 'Space Opera':

Well, as usual wp is missing the *ULTIMATE* space opera movie.

Its just a jump to the left.

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Tech giants' payouts go to everyone but affected citizens. US Supremes now urged to sort it out

Alistair
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Joke

Re: Would it be more palatable (debateable)

"Bad taste. Even with ketchup."

I'll agree. I doubt even Morrisons would put it in a pie.

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No yolking matter: Google Translate cock-up gives Norwegians more than un œuf eggs

Alistair
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Windows

In the same vein as the article.

I think it is interesting that one can order bulk translation functions while offering professional services in a foreign country, and then rinse the translator for Bulkfeil in the translation.

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Secret weekend office bonk came within inch of killing sysadmin

Alistair
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Windows

Re: Live Steam

wait.

Radioactive hydrogen.

PVC?

There were no engineers with any real training on that project.

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Alistair
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Re: Aircon Leaks

And why it rips through cruise ships in a massive hurry. Something about greywater cycling .....

(First question you should ask when boarding)

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Wish you could log into someone's Netgear box without a password? Summon a &genie=1

Alistair
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Windows

Re: "with remote configuration access enabled"

Bob, your leek is showing.

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BOFH: We want you to know you have our full support

Alistair
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Windows

I'm wondering if Rita and the PFY have decided that Simon needs a vacation. A long vacation. With white coats, wheel chairs and weeping willows by a stream, cool spring days with birds chirping....

(Damn, that sounds like a *great* idea)

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Infinidat techie: Let me tell you a thing or two about ruler-format SSDs

Alistair
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Re: More dinosaurs

@Snapper:

Your 100Gb of dutifully collected internet memes will store quite well on your lightning fast flash drive for as long as it is worth powering up. (And just for S&G, unplug that drive for 18 months and see whats there afterward)

Some of us have real storage *requirements* to meet.

Currently reviewing ..... 240Pb .... of DB backup storage.

We'll keep a month on the (twin, geo separated) backup arrays, which although they have great honking flash caches, are ... . oh look. Spinning rust. And the rest of it goes (duplicated copies) on pairs of tapes. With the storage facilities 1100Km apart. Why? you think we're dinosaurs for doing that? No. Because real enterprises have to meet legal requirements. Legal requirements with consequences. Usually financial legal requirements. In two particular cases in my scope, executives can and *have* gone to jail for not having the data available to the courts.

And corporate budgets are corporate budgets. Neither tape nor spinning rust are going anywhere for a *very* long time in many places.

Also:

Trevor -> birds, sharks, lizards, crabs, and the most abundant form of food on the planet, krill.

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