* Posts by TRT

5970 posts • joined 11 Sep 2009

Give 1,000 monkeys typewriters, they'll write Shakespeare. Give them robot arms, and wait – they actually did that?

TRT
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Re: WTF happened to these monkeys

Planet of the Robosimian?

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Re: how convenient...

The ones who failed the motor speed test which involved grabbing a peanut placed on the other side of the razor sharp fan blade.

Or were they ones the police were training to leap out of treetops to wrestle rogue quad-copters to the ground?

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Re: WTF happened to these monkeys

They accidentally got caught in a monkey supplier's net. Still, it's good to know that there's now a market for the rejects.

Nah, they're vicious little bastards who would bite your finger off for shits and giggles. I've no sympathy.

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Thou shalt use our drone app, UK.gov to tell quadcopter pilots

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Since day one...

App, app and away!

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Re: Could they perhaps...

How do you enforce it so that the required identification beacon is carried? Well, in a similar way to how you ensure that cars have their registration plates? You see one, you check for a beacon. Is it the correct one? Well, I guess that's kind of hard. Same as policing anything else really. But at least having a digital registration device makes it easier.

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Re: Could they perhaps...

If there's a two-way communication built into the drone anyway, then it should be possible to do it without a separate transmitter module. I thought of a separate module because then it gets delivered as part of your drone pilot registration return and it's standard for the country it's operating in. There's no reason I picked 10g and a separate module other than it's a small amount of payload which seems reasonable to pack in enough electronics to produce a signal of the required strength to always be detectable a little bit further than the range of the vehicle's operation - line of sight.

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TRT
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Could they perhaps...

require any drone over a certain size to carry an operational identification transmitter, say a radio beacon weighing 10g, emitting a unique digital registration code on a standard multiplexed frequency which could be read by a smartphone user for reporting of privacy infringements? A sort of digital permit for the pilot, or like a registration plate on a car? Or both, even. Micro-SD card carrying the pilot's registration ID.

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Tom Baker returns to finish shelved Doctor Who episodes penned by Douglas Adams

TRT
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DNA

Nicked elements of other Dr Who scripts for his Dirk Gently books. In fact, Dirk Gently is possibly the best Dr Who story never made.

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Vanity, thy name is: M1SCO company car reg plates for sale

TRT
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You try to post as AC, but...

we all know who you are, Mr KVL 741Y

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Re: Vanity Plate...

If it was M15 CO, Andrew Parker would have had it.

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Depressing place to work?

"fork life trucks"

Just lie down in front of them and life won't be bothering you much longer.

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Forget Sesame Street, scientists pretty much watched Big Bird evolve on Galápagos island

TRT
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Chihuahua x Great Dane is possible but unwise due to physical issues such as size of the birth canal, the teat etc. Genetically they are compatible. Ass (Donkey) x Horse do NOT produce a fertile offspring (mule) - their offspring are infertile due to chromosomal number incompatibility (64 vs 62).

Oh, and the vast majority of organisms on the planet are bacteria and they DO reproduce 'sexually', in a fashion. They also reproduce asexually, and it's this bit that's taught up to O level biology - they leave out 'conjugation' until A level.

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I was taught...

that for speciation to be considered complete, it required genetic incompatibility, not simply habitual mating practice. My tutor was of the opinion that so-called 'lock and key' mechanisms were obviously strong contributors to speciation, but because populations could re-converge and re-hybridise, they did not satisfy the proper conditions for speciation. The 'lock-and-key' hypothesis is best exemplified by reference to the erm... 'physical' compatibility or not of the erm... anatomical components required to effect gamete transfer. Indeed some of the videos I've seen on the internet would suggest that can happen in Homo sapiens as well. As for the IT angle... have you ever tried jamming a USB cable into a Firewire port?

The professor I had for Evolutionary Biology was John Maynard Smith, by the way,

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Military test centre for frikkin' laser cannon opens in Hampshire

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They need to design...

a system for mounting these weapons on a variety of different vehicles.

Maybe something known as the

Standardised

Hard-point for

Armaments with

Radiative

Kilowatt

Systems

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Dark fibre arts: Ofcom is determined to open up BT's network

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Seems bizarre to me...

that removing public ownership of previously state sector industries STILL leads to governmental intervention. You either wash your hands of state ownership, or you don't. Stop messing around in the middle ground and thinking that it's in any way acceptable to do that.

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A certain millennial turned 30 recently: Welcome to middle age, Microsoft Excel v2

TRT
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Sounds like Rimmer's revision schedule.

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Royal Navy destroyer leaves Middle East due to propeller problems

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Re: Propellor problems?

Oh yes, I can imagine it now... Captain calls over to the harbourmaster... "Oi, mate! Can I have a tug?"

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Re: I knew it was a mistake

There was a young nudist from Belfast,

Who liked travel by means that were long past.

'til to his dismay,

Whilst out sailing one day,

His rowlocks got caught on the mast.

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Propellor problems?

They're screwed.

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Remember the 'budget' iPhone SE? Apple plans an update – reports

TRT
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Re: I'm in the market for an SE

I don't, no.

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Re: SE2?

Ha ha, SE/30. Good one.

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I'm in the market for an SE

New, of course, 128Gb. Perfect size, takes calls, takes texts and it can do other stuff like maps, what more does one need? If I want to watch TV, I buy a TV. If I want to go out taking photos, I buy a camera.

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Abolish the Telly Tax? Fat chance, say MPs at non-binding debate

TRT
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Re: The crap that's on channel 5...

Last night was a gruesome schedule. The Apprentice. Peaky Blinders. I'm a Celebrity. Lifers Behind Bars. Raped: My Story.

And on the plethora of other channels:

Something about Jamie Bulger, something about getting back with your ex, something about Death Row, something about The Zodiac Killer...

It makes me wonder if there's a reason to live anymore? I didn't get as far as the music channels, but I'm willing to bet there was a 12 hour homage to The Smiths on one channel, and My Music:Tracey Chapman on the other.

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Apple quietly wheels out 'Voxelnet' driverless car tech paper

TRT
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Re: "Odyssey"

Pilgrimage? Crusade? Peregrination? Ah! The Peregrine. That's one model name taken care of. Yes... that's a marketing wet dream isn't it?

Here at Apple, we looked around and thought, "You know, there's lots of technology companies making self-driving cars, and electric vehicles", but at the end of the day they're all still little tin boxes who's purpose is getting you from A to B. We weren't interested in that, we'll leave that to the others. We thought, "You know, wouldn't it be great if we could take the functionality of a car and get rid off all the hassle of ownership - all the maintenance and insurance..." that'd be great, wouldn't it? But for us at Apple, that's not enough. The car is like a little home away from home for the duration of your journey, right? So, what if we were to add to that journey all of the really great things that people enjoy when they're at home. And what if we took all of the things they enjoy when they're moving around too? Woah, that'd be really hard, right? I mean how would you make that work, eh? You want to combine people's cars with their houses and their phones? Come on... you can't make that work, can you? Well, let me introduce to you a new concept in land based vehicular transportation... the iVoyage Odyssey.

*mirrors and smoke effect*

*Applause*

And for the more budget conscious individual...

*mirrors and smoke*

The iVoyage Peregrine.

You're probably looking at these babies and thinking, "How do I get to own one of these?"

Well, let me answer that by telling you now... you don't.

Introducing... iVoyage Freedom. A subscription pass that gives you affordable access to a fleet of iVoyagers tailored to meet your own requirements at the moment that you need them. They will come to you, wherever you need, whenever you need. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

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Re: Opel Automobile GmbH

I think they'll ditch the reference to car or auto, because 1) it doesn't create a worldwide brand and 2) they'll want to redefine a concept.

It'll be short, snappy and descriptive of the look. Like a Pod maybe, but they've already used that one... it'll be the iCraft or the Vessel or something. The Voyager. Yes, that's the one... the Apple Voyager.

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You're such a goober, Uber: UK regulators blast hushed breach

TRT
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I would like to make it absolutely clear...

that Uber did not suffer a data loss event. Uber formed a strategic alliance with a data handling and penetration testing organisation, and the payment to them was a contractual obligation reflecting the level of service provided. As a result of this perfectly normal business relationship, it was not legally required for the company to disclose any breach or data loss because there was no such loss. Thank you.

Do you think they bought it? Wha...? Huh? Oh shit, the microphone's stil.... *click*

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'Gimme Gimme Gimme' Easter egg in man breaks automated tests at 00:30

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Re: Aha!

When all is said and done, any one of us might have thought they were under attack.

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London mayor: Self-driving cars? Not without jacked-up taxes, you don't!

TRT
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He's missing a trick here...

He should be adding them as a TfL service. Khan Khars. Like Boris Bikes and Boris Buses.

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Loake Shoes admits: We've fallen victim to cybercrims

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No reference...

to Doctor Who?

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It's artificial! It's intelligent! It's in my home! And it's gone bonkers!

TRT
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Re: Dark Star...

Dark Star is arguably the most important film ever made.

During the screening, Dan O'Bannon and John Carpenter went round theatres and the feedback they got, because it was supposed to be a comedy Sci-Fi which just didn't really exist at the time, was along the lines of "Was that alien supposed to be scary?"

The pair then thought to themselves "If we can't make them laugh, we'll make them scream".

Dan O'Bannon went on to write Alien, and John Carpenter... Halloween, The Fog etc etc. The rest is history.

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Re: Dark Star...

Silent Running is my all time number one weepy. Sod chick flicks.

Watching the callous deprivations of humanity trigger Lowell's descent into madness, his having to confront the consequences of his own actions before finally committing the ultimate sacrifice as Dewey heads off into the infinite blackness... that gets the waterworks going every time.

I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

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Dark Star...

Is the greatest film ever made. Bar none. The funniest, saddest, most educational, thought provoking, most entertaining movie of all time.

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Re: Applause

Ad-revenue happy?

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Re: How about a muffin?

Your browsing history suggests that you might fancy some crumpet.

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Help desk declared code PEBCAK and therefore refused to help!

TRT
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Re: Memory Issues

We use

I/O error - Incompetent Operator

DNS CIF - Do Not Supply Computer In Future

and

OTAKE - Opinionated Twat. Always Knows Everything.

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Windows Update borks elderly printers in typical Patch Tuesday style

TRT
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Re: IWindows by choice

Odd concept. I thought it was forced.

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Tesla launches electric truck it guarantees won't break for a million miles

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Re: Impressive

Conversion of energy from one form to another - if we can convert renewables into energy rich hydrocarbon fuels in an efficient and sustainable manner whilst spreading our energy needs across an array of different sources - each the most appropriate for the use case - then we might, MIGHT, just be able to continue as a species without choking our own life support system.

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Re: I hope to live long enough to see the end of all gasoline powered vehicles

Bradawl and a night-light. Should give you enough time to get away BEFORE you're caught in the explosion.

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Re: Interesting

I think it's a con. That trailer... it's just an extra, swappable battery pack.

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Re: Could have the whole recharging of batteries going on at specialized power plants

One could put a nuclear generating plant on board.

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Re: When all of our jobs are replaced by Robots...

You know I thought there was something familiar looking about the styling.

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Ads watchdog tells Plusnet: There's no way unlimited business broadband costs £4.50

TRT
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'Customer' vs 'Consumer'

Ah now you see a consommer, they buy soup, whereas a customer buys custard.

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TRT
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"customer" is actually an over-used word

Or the CSA. Client is just as bad - "Person or organisation employing or using the services of a professional person or organisation"; falls down on every count.

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Black Horse Down, we repeat... yes, Lloyds Bank, again

TRT
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Re: So what corners have they cut this time?

The one with the CHIP in it, so they have to use signature verification which is easier to forge.

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The scheduled maintenance went a bit like this...

Planned Equipment Test Effected Total Operational No Go.

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TITSUP

Temporary Issue. Tech Support Urges Patience.

or

This Issue Temporary. Stop Users Panicking!

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World Vasectomy Day: 15k men line up for live vent-blocking

TRT
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Re: "man gravy"

It's man custard. The low-fat version as well, as it will help stop your other half putting on weight.

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Re: Don't believe the hype

Australian small-holder. Got a couple of achers down under.

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80-year-old cyclist killed in prang with Tesla Model S

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Re: Evidence based approach please!

"On the pavement? Really?"

Concrete observations, mate.

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The Quantum of Firefox: Why is this one unlike any other Firefox?

TRT
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Holy crap!

That's quick. Yup, it's an improvement for sure.

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