Brings new meaning...
to pencil pushing.
6017 posts • joined 11 Sep 2009
to pencil pushing.
someone say that they wanted a blessing up the gritter.
How are we going to grit 20,000 miles of road with a 1kg box of Saxa?
I went to university with a girl called Camilla Tornillo. Did I miss a trick here?
have a property on that road?
We’re heading out into intergalactic space! I feel cold, all alone in this infinite void.
Apart from the fleet of black battle cruisers behind us. There are about a hundred-thousand. Is that wrong?
Well, that explains it.
How many hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, we'll fix it in software.
F*ck me. Impressive. Way better than that modern Russian job.
convert human beings into biochemical batteries which you could array in huge nursery stacks, whilst keeping their conscious mind occupied by means of a computer generated artificial reality.
Actually sounds like it would make rather a good film and a couple of shit sequels.
this was a situation about which he tweeted; which is more than poor, dead bird could do.
there should be a machine that projects clothing onto all the muffin tops, orange-peel thighs and short-wearing individuals. Save my delicate sensibilities.
That would effectively kill Apple's 'goose the lays the golden eggs', i.e. a mobile music player. They are NOT going to do that!
No, the idea is to 'cut the cord' so your master music library is in the cloud and you sync your mobile selection with that, the music being downloaded into your iWhatever for use where and when. There's also a handy service included in the fee whereby you obtain an iTunes license for CDs that you may have ripped yourself in the past.
Paul Daniels filling up some wine glasses from a rolled up newspaper.
Won't somebody think of the cork sellers?
who's stuck on a desert island.
Paris: because there's more than one use for a bottle.
Yes, what's wrong with that?
The only two episodes, of the post-2005 bunch, that I'd suggest that a non-Whovian watch would be Midnight and Blink.
Probably Talons of Weng Chiang, Spearhead from Space, Arc in Space and The Dinosaur Invasion.
the role of leading stud?
is becoming a marathon, he snickers.
"Ready for testing... evacuate the chamber"
"Pressure dropping in test chamber..."
"Sir, there's a vacuum in the test chamber!"
They should team up with the Hyperdrive cast & crew, then I'd have something I could definitely make a note of* in my diary.
*to miss / visit my aunt in deepest Peru / die
Wow. When does red become green, eh?
I used to sell these (amongst other things)!
I've come over all nostalgic.
"For you, Kirk, zee Google+ iz over!'
Was it a lamb-ogini?
but some scrote jumped the fence and took a leek last winter.
So it was photographed and displayed in the police photo-ID log. It was a turnip for the books.
As a smallholder myself, I've had a couple of marrows pinched, as well as around four pounds of beans and peas. It's no laughing matter. Oh, and allotments are measured in poles, not rods.
"Get busy with the fizzy Soda Stream"?
Facebook is evil.
and come back in the morning if you still have a headache.
might not have lost any electronics, but have you seen how many leeks they have?
They look suspiciously like gun turrets to me.
Let's see if I can pick up any transmissions... oh yes.
"...Land...," "...safe distance...", "...monitor it, and..."
the odds are slim getting the craft there to begin with, but the chances of anything coming from Mars are a million-to-one.
with the lead-lined wallet in the pocket.
Useful if it keeps track of when you lent your mate a tenner and if they've paid it back or not. Not so useful for ridding yourself of pocket shrapnel at the local tube tramp.
the only colour available is 'Captain Scarlet'
How long does the battery last?
Top left corner pocket...
got distracted by trying to make a gag about Jodrell Bank and my memory got backfilled, understandably, with various thoughts of the Doctor's female (and one male) assistant. Of course, my absolute favourite assistant of all time ever has to be Sarah-Jane. I miss her!
*goes misty eyed*
Of course, there's tons of BBC Sci-Fi tech that El Reg could comment on... I mean, Blake's 7 with Zen (just so cool!), Orac and Slave, Tripods, erm... help me out here.
UFO made in 1969/70, set in 1980.
All this talk of Leela and Vikki and the like... I'm going to have to pop off for a quick Jodrell.
The BOSS operator's console was also used to control a moon-base and a fleet of space interceptors which defended the Earth against organ-stealing green skinned alien invaders around 1980. The voice-interfaced and largely autonomous Space Intruder Detector satellite was much superior to all of these Dr Who efforts, and could even give Siri a run for its money.
Of course Bond would have been very different if he met someone called Gina Talwurtz.
Didn't this happen last year as well? I seem to remember receiving a phone call from my ex-wife screaming at me and accusing me of somehow cancelling all her cards just to embarrass and humiliate her.
I was quite grabbed by this until I saw someone had mis-spelled RADIUS. That would just want to make me throw the thing through the window.
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