* Posts by TRT

6424 posts • joined 11 Sep 2009

Windows worm slips into iOS App Store, climbs into hipsters' pockets

TRT
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Re: I'm sorry

Unused data which has no place in an app for iOS.

Old-timer Odyssey to babysit Curiosity's Mars landing

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Re: About a million to one......

Actually, I was going for MRSA, but you can play with your vibrator if you want.

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Re: Wait a minute. What's that?

The top of the cylinder unscrewed slowly and a creature, the size of a bear but beset with tentacles emerged. A quivering, unearthly hiss emanated from it's leathery lips "Phear us, Earthmen, for we have returned and this time we have Penicillin; mwahahahaha!"

I turned and ran, as fast as I could, at first not knowing where I was going, just allowing myself to be swept along by the stampeding mass of humanity. The,n my senses returning, I fought my way sideways through the press of fleeing man, my destination clear; the hospital at Maidstone where I knew I would find a weapon capable of eliminating the alien horror that had descended.

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Alien

Wait a minute. What's that?

A green flare... some sort of mist.

Virgin Media's 'bye-bye to buffering' beardy Bolt boast BANNED

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I'm more concerned...

that they said that my area would be doubled in July, and last week the page that shows when you can expect to be uprated changed to show we would have to wait until October now!

Watch Smarter: video guide to... optical disc drives

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Re: CD virtually ignored!

Look, you wouldn't believe the number of times I've been asked if this here CD can be erased... and I'm still getting them.

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CD virtually ignored!

No mention of CD-R or CD-RW?

India crowned global spam-spewing zombie king AGAIN

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No Nigeria?

So what's happened to all the cheques I've been sending there?

Sony delays micro-PS3 and colours current crop

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Re: Say what?

So why not just call it Scarlet? Scarlet is a more specific term than simply red. It's a redundancy. You wouldn't get a scarlet blue, would you?

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WTF?

Say what?

Scarlet red? Is there another kind?

Skype: Nearly half of adults don't install software updates

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Windows

Re: What's "apple on windows"?

Any of Apple's executables compiled for Windows architecture, I think is what he means.

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Re: Goddamn updates

I feel your pain.

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Re: More updates... and still more updates.

SNAFU.

System Normal. Another F***ing Update.

Is running IT for the Olympics the worst job in the world?

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I expect they will get IT to work...

I'm given to wondering if this 'forced choice" approach to vendors might not stand the project in better stead for it all working than the other way of allowing people to buck-pass, bitch-moan and threaten breach of contract left right and centre. I mean if you've got no choice but to make it work, then that's what you do, right? WW2 spirit and all of that.

Gov must act on 'innocent' web-browsing copyright timebomb

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Well I just...

hope that nobody sites any case-law in the decision, because that citation may just breach the law.

Where there's brass, silver and gold ... there's also muck

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Re: “will showcase the great diversity and quality of British food

Also, spaghetti hoops on toast.

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Re: “will showcase the great diversity and quality of British food

Lancashire hot pot, stew & dumplings, roast beef, Yorkshire puddings, more cakes than you can shake a stick at, more ways of cooking chicken and rabbit than you can imagine...

Rat-onna-stick?

Why British TV drama is crap – and why this matters to tech firms

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Meh...

you've got to make drama now for the Doctor Who actors to do. (1) they can't risk being typecast (2) they have half a year of down-time and you want to keep them on the payroll.

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Blackout

Was dreadful. I was laughing my arse off at the terribleness of the first episode, which I made it half-way through before I had to turn it off as it was making my ears bleed. The last episode, I did kind of watch ten minutes of before I was asleep. It was well acted and well produced, but virtually plot-free. Well, OK, it had a plot, but it lacked a story.

McDonalds staff 'rough up' prof with home-made techno-spectacles

TRT
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Re: Somebody tell La Forge

I hear she likes to get her hands on a Mars Bar.

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Re: Somebody tell La Forge

And then agonise about it to Troy for hours afterwards...

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Re: Somebody tell La Forge

Of course, at this point he could have done with a 6'8" Klingon backing him up...

Watching Olympics at work? How to avoid a £1k telly-tax fine

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Re: TiVo / Sky Pause?

You might not be watching it live, but you are still receiving it live. See the rules on video recording.

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Re: I still don't get this...

I think it's more to do with the fact that it's a hang-over from the radio license days and they haven't thought of a good enough way of re-writing the rules clearly yet,

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But what about...

all them foreigners what come over here? Even with a battery powered device, they won't be covered because they don't have a home license, and a hotel license doesn't cover portables. I've tried asking the licensing authorities about it, but they won't give me a clear reply; they just keep saying "Oh, your iPad will be covered on your home license", and I say, "But what if I'm a foreigner without a home license?" and they say exactly the same thing again. Pointless.

Apple finally grabs apple.co.uk – after just 16 years

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Re: If you can guess what Apple will call their next product...

iTV?

Oh...

Raspberry Pi used as flight computer aboard black-sky balloon

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You didn't title the article...

Pi in the sky. I'm disappointed.

Skype so sorry for sending that saucy IM to mum instead of pash

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Re: Gah

Amen to that. Who uses the online game facility of Skype? Go on, fess up. *tumbleweed*

Microsoft 'didn't notice' it had removed Browser Choice for 17 months

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I was wondering...

what had happened to that! I thought it was just being suppressed as I routinely install Firefox when setting up a new machine now.

US, Iraqi lawn chair balloonists blown out of sky

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On the other hand...

"Excuse me? Hello. Would you mind just taking this rocket motor powered plane up with you and making sure that the fuse lights properly? Thanks!"

Move over Raspberry Pi, give kids a Radio Ham Pi - minister

TRT
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Re: Radio?

Well I'm sure I could cobble together a morse code transcriptor using a RaspberryPi and a shortwave radio...

Can neighbours grab your sensitive package, asks Post Office

TRT
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Can I get a sticker for my door saying...

I don't want to be woken up by a constant stream of deliveries for my Amazon/eBay obsessed neighbour?

WTF is... WiGig

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More importantly...

How do you pronounce it?

Finnish boffins don tinfoil hats, admit Northern Lights are noisy

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Mushroom

Quite so...

I saw one in Southport back in the early 80s. I have a vivid memory of a crackling meteor passing as a young boy, but when I was older I kept thinking, "No, that's impossible! Time delay, distance etc. couldn't be!"

Ballmer plays down sales impact of Surface

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And kind of impact...

on the surface of an iPad has the potential to shatter it.

BOFH: The back-up backdown smackdown

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Windows

Re: Meh.

I have no qualms about giving away my age. I'm an old fart. I was techhying back in the days when a fix for windows not opening involved a screwdriver and a can of WD40.

I taught computer skills to YTS-thugs in Liverpool and Manchester in 1985/86 when the winters were so cold that your piss froze as it hit the back wall of the metal urinal trough in the training centre. And if only I were exaggerating.

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Re: Meh.

I quote:

"I don't understand how this could happen. The laptop's less than a year old!"

"Age is no guarantee of reliability. Just look at senior management."

i.e. Just because something is new, doesn't make it more reliable.

Yet the senior management quip seems to indicate that just because something is old that doesn't make it reliable.

The comparison doesn't make sense to me. If the quip had been "Age is no guarantee of reliability. Just look at the YTS intake" that would make sense.

I know what he's saying about senior management (although it's good in my department, in the institute as a whole, it is dreadful beyond belief!), I just don't think their failures are correlated in any way shape or form with age. I think the phenomenon of executive management is better explained away using the phrase "shit floats".

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Paris Hilton

Re: Meh.

Eeyore... eeyore... eeyort to have deleted his browsing history.

Paris for obvious reasons.

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Meh.

I didn't think this one was so good. "Age is no guarantee of reliability. Just look at senior management." WTF does that mean? They are older therefore more reliable? Less reliable? What?

And the pain is all in the anticipation of an event anyway. OK, some of it is in the punch the PFY delivers, but resorting to physical violence when simply inducing sufficient paranoia to cause the user to immediately backup 5 fives and therefore run out of space in iCloud or GoogleWhatever or an expensive external HDD...

Far better to get them to dig their own graves.

50 years in SPAAAAACE: Telstar celebrates half-century since launch

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Looks a bit...

like a Mechanoid from very early Doctor Who.

'Biologically accurate' robot legs walk like an Egyptian

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Pity they weren't around when Kraftwerk were popular.

I can just see these replacing Legs & Co.

Olympus MEG4.0 smart glasses will photoshop the REAL WORLD

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Those aren't rose tinted glasses you're wearing...

that's your own blood dripping down in front of your eyes.

The Archers INVADE Guernsey, rebrand it Borchester

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So, the last time Guernsey was invaded...

it was rebranded as Boschchester?

Trekkie pays £45,000 for rusty shuttle

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Re: Garden shed?

If he pulls it home on a trailer behind his SUV, would he boldly tow?

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Re: Always the FNG

Rusty Shuttle? Was that the crewman's name? Sounds more like a porn actor.

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Re: Star Dreck

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say it was only fit to tow garbage? I meant to say, it's only fit to be towed away AS garbage. Ha ha ha ha!

California clears way for Steve Jobs' 'private Apple spaceship'

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Was it also...

programmed to crash?

Pass the soap someone...

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Re: Apricot trees?

No, they were made in a factory, sorry, manufacturing facility, just north of Edinburgh... Glen-something. Glenrothes, was it? We visited there as part of a computer course for kiddies run by Herriot-Watt university back in the 80s.

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Re: Apricot trees?

I visited the Apricot factory once.

Shuttleworth: Why Windows 8 made us ditch GPL Linux loader

TRT
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Windows

Well anyway...

thank you for flagging that up. That's probably saved me a centimetre of hairline and 16 hours of work when I can't get MemTestGold or an ERP disc or my Win7install bootable USB stick working on a new machine someone's bought.

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