* Posts by TRT

4773 posts • joined 11 Sep 2009

50th anniversary of the ATM opens debate about mobile payments

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Cash still has some advantages

And it's full of beefy goodness!

1
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Another Gibson Prediction Becoming Reality

ROOSTA: “Wormhole disco. Loudest noise on Betelgeuse. Free body debit for one night only.” What’s a body debit?

ZAPHOD: Oh you have been roughing it for too long Roosta. You missed out on progressive consumerism. Look, an old style credit card, you press the panel on the card, it makes an instant debit on your bank account and an instant credit to the shop’s account, right?

ROOSTA: I prefer hard cash. If you can’t scratch a window with it I don’t accept it.

ZAPHOD: Yeah, yeah, yeah, but get this: body debit means you press this card and it debits all your molecules from where you’re standing and your body goes into credit somewhere else!

ROOSTA: In the disco!

ZAPHOD: Right!

ROOSTA: Escape!

ZAPHOD: Yeah!

ROOSTA: It’d better be a good disco.

ZAPHOD: Listen, if it was a good disco they wouldn’t have to give away body debit cards. Right Roosta, we are going to grove our way out of here!

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: I think you will find...

most Americans call IT an ATM Machine.

TFTFY. ;)

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Extinct in ten years?

Where do you swipe it?

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Reg Varney from '70s sitcom On the Buses

He was in 'The Rag Trade' before that. And "The Great St. Trinian's Train Robbery". And something called "Beggar my Neighbour". But most people know him as Butler from "On The Buses". I believe he lived in Enfield at the time - handy for the studios up at Borehamwood.

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

"cash dispenser"???

Hole in'th' wall.

7
0

Hot news! Combustible Galaxy Note 7 to return as 'Galaxy Note FE'

TRT
Silver badge

Maybe it's just...

Feh.

0
0

Huge ransomware outbreak spreads in Ukraine and beyond

TRT
Silver badge

NHS managers NEVER shit bricks.

They know how over stretched the service is that will be needed to repair their damaged sphincters.

8
1

Software glitch led to London Ambulance Service outage – report

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Oracle "Recycle bin"

I got about 16 words into that piece of documentation and the voice in my head turned into that of Sir Humphrey Appleby, GCB, KBE, MVO, MA (Oxon).

9
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Oracle "Recycle bin"

"When you drop a tablespace including its contents, the objects in the tablespace are not placed in the recycle bin and the database purges any entries in the recycle bin for objects located in the tablespace. The database also purges any recycle bin entries for objects in a tablespace when you drop the tablespace, not including contents, and the tablespace is otherwise empty."

Not exactly crystal clear.

2
0

AES-256 keys sniffed in seconds using €200 of kit a few inches away

TRT
Silver badge

Re: obviously...

No, she'll just ban encryption.

4
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: In effect "traffic analysis" applied at the bus level.

What kind of noise do you get from multicore / multiprocessor systems?

4
0

Virgin Media router security flap follows weak password expose

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Who actually uses the router ?

I put a Cisco RV-320 on as the first device - so that basically gives me a business class VPN right there, with remote management if I need it and various dynamic DNS registrations for fulfilling that function. There's naturally firewall and proper NAT functions there, as well as the DHCP, and a failover route if I ever feel the need.

Then for the WiFi, I used one of the free-if-you-attend-their-seminars Meraki MR18 access points which I plug into the RV-320 via a POE injector. When the provided license for that ran out after 3 years, I swapped it to an Open MESH access point. I pay for 70 meg, I get 70 meg, even over WiFi when I'm in the flat. Out on the lawns it drops to around 20-30 meg due to the distance. I do get a drop out once or twice a day, but that's the pigging Virgin side. Within the LAN, so back to my DLNA and file server, I get gigabit speeds over copper with absolutely no drop out and full control over QoS. 24/7/365 (barring UK power issues).

The Superhub 2 was an utter PoS. WiFi dropped out, wouldn't bond the 2.4 and 5GHz, there was no control over the QoS, the wired network dropped out regularly even, locked up DHCP every couple of months, requiring a factory reset, can't do dynamic DNS so I could remote in to check it if the flatmate called up because the WiFi had bombed out again...

3
2
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Who actually uses the router ?

That's what I do!

5
1

PC rebooted every time user flushed the toilet

TRT
Silver badge

Re: ????

I would NOT trust the French with mains voltage electrics. La Cie, anyone?

6
2
TRT
Silver badge

Re: 'front bum'

I thought that read 'front bump'.

I've always found this place to be mildly amusing as it drifts across my sat-nav screen when I reach the end of the M1.

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

BBC Micro...

failed to boot, couldn't find anything wrong with it. Cold started it, discharged the PSU completely. Checked the voltages on the PSU. All good. Took it into the physics lab at school to look for a clock pulse with the oscilloscope. That was all there... still no joy. So I decided to pull the CPU out and look at the signals there, swap in a fresh CPU if needs be. Touched the top of the chip and got a small kick in the end of my finger. Tried again, and the machine came up straight away.

Took it back to my friend's house, and he plugged it back in and set it up again.

Next day, the same issue, no boot. So I went over on the way to school - he was on his HAM radio set when I called. The aerial lead ran right under the BBC, and there was a little bit more of a SWR reading than I would have expected. On closer inspection, the aerial cable was heavily kinked right where the computer had been sitting on it, and I don't know how, but a charge was building up on the surface of the CPU and jamming it.

Solution? A new lead for the aerial, a small sliver of kitchen foil glued to the top of the CPU with a lead running off to the motherboard ground, and a chicken wire Faraday cage around the BBC, monitor and diskette drive, just for good measure.

10
1
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Any decent cistern administrator...

Could be a low level cistern error, though.

Chain *

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

I believe it's pond side slang for a device that corrects brown outs. I did have a couple that came over with some kit from the states many years ago, but I never used them because... 240V. Huge great transformer it looked like, must have weighed 15kg, with a couple of black boxes slapped on the ends, one of which contained a diode pack that looked like it could have rectified the entire National Grid and a capacitor of lethal dimensions.

Words for technological devices mutate over there. I had so many customers come into Radio Shack wanting new batteries for their convertor. Now a convertor is a cable TV box, but they call the remote control for that a convertor. And there are a dozen other examples of inaccuracy in the common parlance for things electrical.

--EDIT--

Ha ha ha. Brown outs.

21
0

Genoans flout terror ban with bumper basil hand baggage policy

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Did you forget to toast your nuts?

Wheel nuts?

1
0

Researchers take the piss with pee-powered liquid energy project

TRT
Silver badge

How about simply...

"You're in charge"

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Power over IP.

1
0
TRT
Silver badge

Commercial harvesting

Domestos etc aren't going to be too chuffed about this drop off in sales of shit you throw down the bog.

0
0

Cheeky IT rival parks 'we're hiring' van outside 'vote Tory' firm Storm Technologies

TRT
Silver badge

Re: @Hollerithevo

Did I get the attribution wrong? I know that there's a wisdom of Solomon tale about the woman with two babies. Maybe he was very, very wise and was brought in to judge many disputes. Just like Anna, the Skyr yoghurt woman.

---EDIT---

I did get the attribution wrong. The story of the thief and the stick was the wisdom of Birbal. I'm sure someone told me it was Solomon. Ah well. The principle is the same.

4
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: How would Storm know?

Ah, the wisdom of Solomon. Two men were accused of theft. Knowing that the punishment would be the cutting off of their hands, both men were terrified. Only one had committed the crime, but it was impossible to say which it was and neither would confess, both proclaimed innocence. Solomon was asked to intercede in the case, and he had his court wizard enchant two sticks of equal length such that they would grow a full inch overnight when in the presence of a thief.

In the morning, the men were fetched from their cells and the sticks were compared. Solomon declared that he had knew who the thief was so the sentence was carried out. Solomon knew the guilty man was the one with a stick an inch SHORTER than the other. Only one person knew who was guilty, the thief themselves, and in fear of the punishment they had seen the stick growing and had broken an inch off to avoid their fate. The honest man knew he had nothing to fear so left the stick alone.

So really Storm does not need to know who voted which way. The voter alone knows which way they voted, and that is enough. The mere threat of losing one's livelihood may be enough to influence a decision, subconsciously or consciously. Rationality doesn't come into it. Sticks do not grow an inch overnight, bosses do not know which way an individual staff member voted - this does not matter.

33
0

Humanity uploaded an AI to Mars and lets it shoot rocks with lasers

TRT
Silver badge

Re: FFS, does no-one remember the future?

Opportunity? Subsequent missions... Harmony, Destiny, Symphony, Rhapsody, Melody.

7
0
TRT
Silver badge

The famous Herring Sandwich experiment.

"The easiest way to fool a completely logical robot is to feed it with the same stimulus sequence over and over again so it gets locked in a loop. This was best demonstrated by the famous Herring Sandwich experiments conducted millennia ago at MISPWOSO (the MaxiMegalon Institute of Slowly and Painfully Working Out the Surprisingly Obvious).

A robot was programmed to believe that it liked herring sandwiches. This was actually the most difficult part of the whole experiment. Once the robot had been programmed to believe that it liked herring sandwiches, a herring sandwich was placed in front of it. Where upon the robot thought to itself, Ah! A herring sandwich! I like herring sandwiches."

"It would then bend over and scoop up the herring sandwich in its herring sandwich scoop, and then straighten up again. Unfortunately for the robot, it was fashioned in such a way that the action of straightening up caused the herring sandwich to slip straight back off its herring sandwich scoop and fall on to the floor in front of the robot. Whereupon the robot thought to itself, Ah! A herring sandwich..., etc., and repeated the same action over and over again."

"The scientists at the Institute thus discovered the driving force behind all change, development, and innovation in life, which was this: herring sandwiches. They published a paper to this effect, which was widely criticized as being extremely stupid. They checked their figures and realized that what they had actually discovered was "boredom," or rather, the practical function of boredom. In a fever of excitement they then went on to discover other emotions like "irritability," "depression," "reluctance," "ickiness," and so on. The next big breakthrough came when they stopped using herring sandwiches, whereupon a whole welter of new emotions became suddenly available to them for study, such as "relief," "joy," "friskiness," appetite," "satisfaction," and most important of all, the desire for "happiness.""

10
3

UCL ransomware attack traced to malvertising campaign

TRT
Silver badge

Outlook Obscur-o-matic link checker...

is more of a hinderance than a help. Completely obfuscates the original URL, so any user education about how to spot a dodgy link is lost.

6
2

Oxford profs tell Twitter, Facebook to take action against political bots

TRT
Silver badge

alt.democracy.die.die.die

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

Many warnings through the last century...

of the dangers of algocracy.

6
0

Brit uni blabs students' confidential information to 298 undergrads

TRT
Silver badge

Oh Christ on a bike! It's almost as bad as doing everything in Word or Excel, stored on Sharepoint.

I mean, why get people to complete the reams of paperwork required for a project specification as word documents which are then stored in a hierarchical folder based structure that varies around a core design depending on who the Project Administrator is? That administrator then has to copy the information from the word forms into PowerBi, which churns out an incomprehensible set of graphs and a pile of hyperlinks to other word documents. It's bizarre and archaic! But it's the latest thing. Apparently. Working stupid is the latest thing. Amazing.

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Have to agree that many organisations operate a monolithic structure where the ERP systems aren't flexible enough to do the job, but they're so insular and unmodifiable that for a rough and dirty report on, say, pay by gender, or pay by disability or amount of paternal leave taken, or percentage of students requiring special measures for exams, that it's often quicker, easier and within the DIY reach of a member of support staff to take the data through Excel to get the result.

So often I get asked, "How quickly can you get a breakdown of historic research income by quarter separated by the gender ratio within the lab and gender of the lead investigator?" that when I reply "Two days, including testing, once I've finished this epic piece of coding I'll get straight onto it for you." I get "I could do that in Excel in, like, an hour".

2
1
TRT
Silver badge

You have no idea (or maybe you do) how mind rippingly annoying it is to carefully craft a web-app front end to an encrypted database designed to keep all this kind of information safe only to be asked (1) to code an excel download option and (2) see those data appearing unencrypted in spreadsheets on the shared folders.

27
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Another reason to ban Outlook.

Outlook must be the only email system I've seen with a recall option. I obviously am wrong on this, but that's down to the fact that I've not seen every email system under the sun, only a few well used and popular ones.

4
1

'OK, everyone. Stop typing, this software is DONE,' said no one ever

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Hammers

"Warning. Notification of license expiry. Your Hammer Time has now finished."

21
0
TRT
Silver badge

Or complaining that the 17th ed regs mean that documenting the installation is now compulsory and it's easier to get the paperwork right by reinstalling the whole shebang from scratch than trying to reverse engineer it to prove the earth bonding is to spec.

23
0
TRT
Silver badge

If you're into tool porn...

like me, a quick browse through the Screwfix catalogue will reveal that the hammer isn't quite done yet. All manner of materials creep into the design, all manner of refinements and enhancements... precision shot weighted dampening, hickory tang inserts, 3D printed head rivet pins, magnetic holders, precision ground anti-slip striking faces, anti-sweat bio-active grip windings...

Of course taking a shoe off and whacking in a pin to hold up that new print from the little corner shop that sells dust collecting motivational framed pictures is mostly good enough for some people.

46
0

Elon Musk reveals Mars colony rocket capable of bringing pizza joints to the red planet

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Hmmmn.. pizza!

When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie, that's a gravitational perturbance of catastrophic proportion, possibly caused by the explosion of a nuclear waste facility constructed just over the furthest terminator on the dark side of the moon

4
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: What about Oxygen?

I prefer Mars on ice-cream. Ah... the return of the Ice-cream Warriors.

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

That diagram reminds me...

of a Dalek cutaway diagram for some reason.

4
0

Report estimates cost of disruption to GPS in UK would be £1bn per day

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Alternatively...

Weston-Super-Mare is even worse. It's like some sort of quantum singularity at the centre of it. You cannot escape. And apparently if you do manage to escape, you go insane. I know, I was there once. For FOUR HOURS. I went under the same narrow railway bridge eight times.

1
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Alternatively...

My God! Why do you think the satellite industry is so heavily dominated by males? They'd rather design a space satellite navigation system engineered around near-quantum effects, precision components built to a tolerance unheard of and ruggedised to withstand the harsh radiation environment of space and launched atop multimillion pound rocket delivery systems, than actually have to ASK for directions.

The whole concept of GNSS came about when a rocket engineer's wife was nagging him to stop the car and ask the postman which was the right road for Weymouth town centre.

15
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Back-up must not be satellite

Did you watch that crap solar attack film on SciFi this weekend too? The dinosaur one was better (as in worse) but at least it had Dick Jones (Robocop) getting ripped to pieces by a dinosaur.

3
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Alternatively...

Heck squeeze me? Check out the junk. I'm male. We just don't DO that kind of thing.

10
0
TRT
Silver badge

Alternatively...

we could keep going for a bit with reduced accuracy using that handy crowd-sourced WiFi / cell tower to GPS / positional mapping data that the big companies like Apple and Google have been slurping for the last 10 years. My old iPod did a fair job of location finding, and that's not got any sort of a GNSS chip in it.

1
0

Software dev bombshell: Programmers who use spaces earn MORE than those who use tabs

TRT
Silver badge

Re: Left handed touch-typist

Diet tab. Unless you need the sugar rush.

0
0
TRT
Silver badge

Re: Tabs are inconsistent...

I always used a fixed width font for code. It helps lining up similar blocks of code and makes it easier to spot rogue characters. Keeping variable names a consistent length helps as well - it's also fun trying to think up alternative words for describing a variable's use that has the same number of characters.

2
0

Don't touch that mail! London uni fears '0-day' used to cram network with ransomware

TRT
Silver badge

Re: "no reports of the malware impacting Mac or Linux machines"

Excepting where research groups used shared folders and one group member had a Windows machine.

0
0

Labour says it will vote against DUP's proposed TV Licence reforms

TRT
Silver badge

That's a LOT of comments...

Wow. Hot topic

0
0

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017