* Posts by TRT

5468 posts • joined 11 Sep 2009

YouTuber cements head inside microwave oven

TRT
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Re: On the Internet nobody knows your a dog.

Pr0n0 time...

Boom-chikka-chihuahua

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SkippyBing! Sounds a bit like a broken clockwork microwave timer.

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UK.gov law resources now untrustworthy, according to browsers

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Re: That's not UK Gov Law, it is UK.GOV JUSTICE

I thought 'justice' was the standard reply to the question asked, when called to the bar, "What would you like in your single malt whisky, your honour?"

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Bizarre...

I must get at least 4 email warning a day for the month leading up to a certificate expiry date. Even AFTER I've paid for and installed the new certificate. It drive me insane, TBH.

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It's a decade since DevOps became a 'thing' – and people still don't know what it means

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Re: Yawn...

I thought it meant single-person software companies.

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Meet the woman with a supernatural affinity for stiff lovers

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Re: A wide choice

A cover of that one from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes... How did it go now? Something about gem stones? Ah yes, Amethyst's a ghoul's best friend.

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So if she enjoys a bit of...

DP A/V, would she be having fun between the sheets?

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No, BMW, petrol-engined cars don't 'give back to the environment'

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Re: Flintstones car

Hewing those stone rollers into shape must have caused some greenhouse gas emissions, if only from the bottoms of the plant-eating dinosaurs that lifted the slabs around on their noggins and powered the various machinery in Mr Slate's quarry, IIR (the cartoon) C. It might not have been Mr Slate - I seem to recall the owner was also referred to as Mr Boulder and Mr Rockhead at some point.

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I was driving behind an Audi TFSi the other day...

I spent ages trying to work out what kind of engine that badge mark meant, then as we reached our fifth turning together, I realised that it means "This Fucker Seldom indicates".

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Something weird to deck the Xmas tree with: 3D-printed Wi-Fi baubles

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What's...

the association with Christmas tree baubles again?

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Quentin Tarantino in talks to make Star Trek movie

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Re Have you forgotten Battlefield Earth already?

*reaches for bottle of ret-con*

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Re: all shirts will be red to some extent

Number One, assemble an away team. Take Mr Blue, Mr Yellow and Mr Red.

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Re: We've already been treated to that in Discovery.

Cruising the outer rim?

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Pulp Science-fiction, obviously.

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Re: great

Mr Barclay... please escort Ambassador Baraccus to his shuttle craft...

I ain't gettin' on shuttle craft. Double with that fool.

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Simon Pegg, Dr Who / Star Trek fusion.

The Editor and Mr Sin take on Captain Kirk... Ooh! Ooh! Mirror, Mirror universe story. YES!

Bad Scottie, Beardy Spock.

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Re: Star Trek: Discovery

I prefer the retro-remake, Star Trek: Very Disco.

Get down, get down... n' boogie.

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Samuel L Jackson in Star Trek

"I sense a plot to destroy my brothers. The Dark Side of the Federation challenges the Chancellor.

We must move quickly if the alliance is to survive. The oppression of the Klingons will never return! You, my lord, have lost!"

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Re: few substances stronger than alien liqueurs

This is not alien liquor, it's f*cking Cristal.

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Car rental firms told: Tell your customers about in-car data slurps

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Re: Rang the assessors as Dr, they assumed medical

Yeah, that's right, Ronnie Pickering. Dr Ronnie Pickering.

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O Christmas wreath, O Christmas wreath, thy potent skunk's in bunches

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Our hallway...

already smells disgusting with weed as it is.*

*NOT mine, before anyone says. The junkers downstairs are growing it.

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...a sausage roll

or 4 if cut into mini-sausage rolls.

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Spy-on-your-home Y-Cam cameras removes free cloud storage bit

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They're doing it wrong...

Keep the storage free; charge for access.

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Boffins foresee most software written by machines in 2040

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Prove it...

Get it to the stage it can comment and document human written code first, then I might believe it to be possible.

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Vivaldi Arms onto Raspberry Pi

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Re: So long... full screen...

However it is very useful indeed for an autonomous touch-screen kiosk making use of low cost components. If I use an init script to start it in full screen, I want it to stay in full screen and I don't want my underware showing through.

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Re: embedded borderless PDF browsing

It means that if you use either an iframe or an embed object tag with an href pointed to a PDF file, and if you pass suitable parameters, then the contents appear without any additional controls, scrollbars, borders etc. I use if for displaying event posters submitted to an upload facility.

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So long...

as it does full screen take over, interval refresh by command line invocation and embedded borderless PDF browsing, I'll be happy. I currently use a Chrome based browser to do all of this (except the blasted borderless PDF, so I'm stuck with doing a SVG conversion beforehand).

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Apple sprays down bug-ridden iOS 11 with more fixes

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Re: Can you please...

iOS11 itself. I have too much which would be broken by 11 to upgrade - I want to permanently opt out of the upgrade but is that an option? No.

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Can you please...

stop trying to force me to upgrade my perfectly functional iOS10 device to this shit. PLEASE?

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Brit MP Dorries: I gave my staff the, um, green light to use my login

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Re: Surely Parliament can cope with English placenames?

The filter was designed by that company with the HQ on Gropecunt Lane.

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Nationwide UK web bank and app take unscheduled nap

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Re: How ...

I blame Frank Bough.

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How ...

... widespread is the disruption?

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Germany says NEIN to purchase incentive for Tesla Model S

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Re: nope.

Am I wrong in my understanding that fuel cells actually generate electricity, then?

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Is Oomi the all-in-one smart home system we've been waiting for?

TRT
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All voice control systems...

Seem to have some trigger phrase.

Hey, Siri!, OK Google etc

Is this one "So, Oomi."?

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Report: Women make up just 17% of IT workforce, paid 15% less than men

TRT
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Non-standard hours?

Since when has a CIO or a PHB worked unsociable hours? And since when have they ever required actual technical experience that can only be gained through the sort of field work that one associates with unsociable hours?

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A confounding factor may be the applicant's required qualifications. If you can't get the entry level jobs, then you can't get the experience to apply for the higher level jobs - there's a filter on applications as well as a result of that. There's a temporal component to the workforce availability. Point is definitely taken, though. This is a crude analysis.

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Royal Bank of Scotland culls 1 in 4 branches, blames the interwebz

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Re: Limits of pragmatism

Language has changed so much that they've had to amend the definition to fit the popular misconception. That sort of thing has just decimated the dictionary.

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User dialled his PC into a permanent state of 'Brown Alert'

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Re: fires a taser out at the user

The Zap drive?

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Re: Haunted messages...

Our Apple lab had 44 iMac CRTs ranged on the benches. Apple Remote Desktop used to have a lovely "play sound" function, as well as the capability of turning the microphone on remotely. We could eavesdrop on suspicious looking groups of students lurking near the back of the lab away from the technician's windows, then play machine gun fire from all around them.

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Re: Brownouts

Brown is actually a yellow that is much darker than something else yellow.

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Re: I use a twist tie to shorten [...] cables

They kept taking them off because they liked propping the keyboard on their tummy at the ultimate stage of relaxation / slouch (I tried it - it takes more energy to maintain that kind of extreme slouch than sitting properly!).

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At a college of design...

a favourite cry was that the keyboard or mouse had stopped working in the PC lab. Never happened in the Apple lab, oddly. But the usual cause was that the lazy buggers had slouched further and further back on the chairs, stretching their legs further and further under the desks until their toes had caught the excessively long USB keyboard/mouse cables hanging down the gap at the back of the desk and yanked them out of the rear of the machine. The iMacs were of the all-in-one CRT design, and the USBs plugged in at the side, so it was obvious when they started pulling loose.

Stingy old estates wouldn't buy us the properly designed cantilever desks with cable management trays and toe boards - we had to use the solid oak 4 leg tables that had served the design department for the last 50 years since when the college buildings were finally finished off after the end of WW2. I secretly didn't mind plugging the keyboards back in if it meant we could keep all the oak tables, the wainscotting, flock wallpaper, cat 2 suspended billiard hall style lighting, oak window shutters and gilt framed portraits of former principals on the wall - it made the place more like a cut price country club than the late 70s / early 1980s drab office, vertical blind, plastic potted plant, room dividers open plan labs in the newer building extension.

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Acronym alert...

POS = Point Of Sale or Piece Of Shit?

Or both?

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Foil snack food bags make a decent Faraday cage, judge finds

TRT
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Not "Grenfell the disaster" but "Grenfell" as in a large tower block that was suddenly covered in aluminium sheeting supported by a steel skeleton.

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Problem not bunking off...

He went playing golf. And THAT is an activity reserved for management. Inappropriate aspirations.

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Wonder how that affected e.g. Grenfell?

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That 70s Show: Windows sprouts Sets and Timeline features

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Re: Journal

versioning in VMS was a godsend.

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SpaceX 'raises' an extra 100 million bucks to get His Muskiness to Mars

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Did he get a message from himself?

Can we hammer tracking beacons up his nose?

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Give 1,000 monkeys typewriters, they'll write Shakespeare. Give them robot arms, and wait – they actually did that?

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Re: WTF happened to these monkeys

Planet of the Robosimian?

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Re: how convenient...

The ones who failed the motor speed test which involved grabbing a peanut placed on the other side of the razor sharp fan blade.

Or were they ones the police were training to leap out of treetops to wrestle rogue quad-copters to the ground?

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