* Posts by Lord Elpuss

780 posts • joined 17 Aug 2009

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Hawaiian fake nukes alert caused by fat-fingered fumble of garbage GUI

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Unfrendly Fire

"The fact is by any rational measure Trump has been far more successful in his first year than anyone expected."

I'd actually agree with that. He's still in office, which surprises the hell out of me. And I'd even give him the tax win, although that would have been done a lot quicker had he not been making political enemies left right and center.

As for the rest...

- The investigation was primarily triggered by his Trumpness firing Comey, and saying it was related to the Russia thing.

- The 'Left-wing media machine' is, you know, the normal media. They just hate Trump because he's a pathological liar, then when they call him out on his BS, he calls them liars.

- Hillary paying for stuff.... I have no idea. Neither do you.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Unfrendly Fire

Bill C was never confused, he was playing everything, and everyone, for whatever he could get. And Obama a bumbling idiot? I rest my case by referring you to https://youtu.be/UnW3xkHxIEQ.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Unfrendly Fire

”Um...would you care to point out which presidents in recent memory (and presidential candidates) have *not* been idiots?“

You may or may not agree with the policies, but Obama, Bill C, Bush Senior, Reagan and JFK were not idiots.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Unfrendly Fire

"I mean. when they weren't blaming him for stupidity, incompetence, racism, sexual harassment, cronyism, collusion, and bad hair. No doubt more charges will be leveled in future."

Finally Big John - something you and I agree on.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Unfrendly Fire

"BTW, at least two well-known Hollywood actors are now accusing President Trump of creating so much (alleged) war fear that it greatly exacerbated the Hawaii alert panic, making him the main culprit!"

Well, making him the main culprit is a little harsh, but there would be a lot less fear floating about if he didn't take every chance he could to kick Kim in the balls.

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Who's that at Ring's door? Why, it's Skybell with a begging cup, er, patent rip-off lawsuit

Lord Elpuss
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Obligatory

https://xkcd.com/937/

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That was fast... unlike old iPhones: Apple sued for slowing down mobes

Lord Elpuss
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Re: "To provide a better experience to customers"

"This is bunch of lies. Can Apple explain -

1. Why other smart phones Google Pixel, Samsung etc. do not have this issue?

2. Why after replacing battery with new one, still have the same issues like -

- have to wait 5-10 seconds before camera becomes live,

- applications die randomly,

- phone reboots all of sudden

time to dump iphone and look for another smart phone...."

Given that this is a 'laws of physics' problem, it's guaranteed that Pixel, Samsung etc will have the same problem. They might manage it in a different way (e.g. reducing global performance rather than peak throttling), or they might just allow devices to spontaneously reboot, or they might (my favorite) just not bother updating the devices at all after a certain period.

My hope is that however they do it, their communication is better than Apple's. Because that's the real problem here.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Makes you wonder

"Mind you she didn't try resetting the iPad either."

Hmmm. Far be it for me to play amateur psychologist, but I would suspect here that Mrs. Anon just fancied a new iPad, and made the facts fit the case.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Not a welcome opinion

"If you pay about three times as much for a phone than is necessary, largely because it's a status symbol, knowing perfectly well that without the slightest technical or engineering justification its battery cannot be simply swapped by you; not to mention that it will also lack the simple expandability and versatility of a uSD slot, again with no good reason; and for which the $23 actual difference between various models' storage levels is charged to you in a $200 increment ... well, you get what you deserve, don't you?"

Oh pish, dearest Milton. Any purchase of a luxury product is a combination of the commoditised cost, the perceived value-add layer, and the emotional desire component. Apple charges for perceived value-add and emotional desire, and gets away with it because people generally actually like the value for money (including emotional) that they get for it. It's not wrong, and it's not stupid just because you don't agree with it. I personally like a commodity kitchen (simple, no frills, gets the job done) and a luxury phone. Others may prefer this the other way round; it's every customers' individual choices and preferences at work.

And the $23 price you point at? Double pish. Integrated memory fast enough to not bottleneck the processor AND designed to last the life of the product being intensively read/written to every single day is not cheap. Certainly not $23 cheap.

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Lord Elpuss
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That's what this lawsuit is all about - and they do have a point. It's not about whether Apple throttled the iPhone or not, or even whether they told people they were doing it; it's about whether it was made clear to punters that they could restore performance with a battery replacement rather than having to buy a new phone.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Not smart

"There are hard coded performance tables. If your phone is x months old, reduce CPU speed by y.

If your battery is outperforming its predicted performance, tough, its time to upgrade to anew iPhone..."

Utter bollocks. Go pimp your trash on Reddit where idiots might believe you.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Planned obsolescence

"So by this standard, I should just throw my 5S in the bin...."

Replacing the battery on a 5S is a piece of piss. Replacing the battery in my son's RC car remote is harder.

And for an out-of-warranty 5S, there's no point paying for original Apple. A decent eBay battery will cost you $15 or so and your phone will be back to full speed in no time.

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Lord Elpuss
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"The fact that batteries get worse over time should be a clue that batteries should be not be considered safe to embed into a device..."

The hundreds of millions of devices with problem-free embedded LiIon cells would beg to differ with this statement.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: That probably explains..

Like the iPhone 7, 7+, 8, 8+ and X?

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: That probably explains..

"If the battery degradation is so great as to warrant this, why not fit a bigger fecking battery to start with..."

Because that would only change the use case, not the outcome. With a bigger battery, users would likely do more - leaving it streaming music, not switching on low-power mode, keeping the brightness up high and so on. Wouldn't change the fact that the number of charge cycles is finite, and as battery performance decreases more and more technological patches are necessary to maintain usability.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: "To provide a better experience to customers"

"...and if I plop down $89 (or whatever) to replace the battery in my iPhone 6, would its CPU still get throttled down just because it's an older model?"

No. With a new battery the CPU then returns to full speed operation.

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Lord Elpuss
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"The Cupertino idiot-tax operation's..."

Grow the fuck up.

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Yes, your old iPhone is slowing down: iOS hits brakes on CPUs as batteries wear out

Lord Elpuss
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Re: I wonder...

”So the question is, if the battery is replaced does the OS take away the deliberate slow down?

NO“

Yes it does. Completely back to normal”*“

”*“ ’Normal’ may still mean that your battery life is shit, but it will be just as normally shit as everybody else.

For the record though if you’re getting 0.5 days on a new battery, you’re either running it 100% all of the time, or something’s f*cked.

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IBM reminds staff not to break customers in pre-Xmas fix-this-now rush

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Someone not following best practices

"WTF is this "rush to fix?""

To be fair, it doesn't matter when the deadline is - whether it's the Christmas hols, or an arbitrary '15th'. There will always be a panicked rush to get stuff fixed beforehand. If IBM adopted the 15-7th approach (which sounds reasonable to me) there would have been the same mail from the higher-ups saying don't rush it, just this time sent December 1st instead of 14th.

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Disk drive fired 'Frisbees of death' across data centre after storage admin crossed his wires

Lord Elpuss
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Lathes

When I was at university somebody forgot to tighten the 10kg chuck on the machine shop lathe. When the lathe spun up to speed the chuck came loose, hit the floor at 2000rpm and took off like a rocket.

Years later the hole in the wall of the machine shop was still there. Pour les encourager les actress.

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iPhone X Face ID fooled again by 'evil twin' mask

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Obligatory

"But what happens if your subject is a masochist (gets off from that kind of stuff) or a wimp (faints at the mere sight of it)?"

Doesn't matter. As long as you can manoeuvre their thumb onto the sensor/point their face at the camera, you can break crypto. Whether or not they enjoy the process is irrelevant...

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Lord Elpuss
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Yep. Check my previous posts.

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Lord Elpuss
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Obligatory

https://xkcd.com/538/

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Lord Elpuss
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"...Sadly, payers of the Cupertino idiot tax..."

Grow the fuck up, Iain.

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iPhone X: Bargain! You've just bagged yourself a cheap AR device

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Why do people buy the iPhone X?

”The answer is because every BMW owner I've known has owned one because of the social statement it makes rather than because of some sort of technical superiority.“

The one car I truly covet is the 2012 BMW 335i Convertible; fully loaded, in white. This, to me, is my dream car. If I ever find myself in the position of owning one, I will be a BMW owner who drives a BMW because I think it’s an aesthetically beautiful, well engineered machine that makes me feel alive when I’m behind the wheel. Couldn’t give a shit about the ‘social statement’ or other people’s opinions.

There are probably other BMW owners out there who feel like this. Just saying.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: No thanks, I despise AR.

”I was laughing my arse off when those bunch of morons were camping at parks and playing Pokemon Go a couple of years ago.“

Gosh, it must be amazing being as achingly cool as you were. How dare those other people have fun doing something that’s so obviously beneath you.

Twat.

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Tesla launches electric truck it guarantees won't break for a million miles

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Tesla semi?

@theModge

Brake. Not break.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Tesla semi?

"So maybe my uncle (who owns a trucking business, though he's close to retiring now) could consult for them. Or any OTHER experienced driver that understands electricity and mechanical engineering, for that matter."

Do you actually, seriously, believe that Tesla have developed this without input from the trucking community?

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World Vasectomy Day: 15k men line up for live vent-blocking

Lord Elpuss
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"...out of deferens..."

ISWYDT

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Chrome update kills unwanted ad redir... WIN A FREE iPad!!

Lord Elpuss
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Re: One piece of feedback

"It's not a problem, it is how redirection should work."

When I visit a webpage and am redirected by 3rd party content which I didn't ask for, that's not how 'redirection should work' - it's abusive and Google is right to put a stop to it.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: One piece of feedback

Google articulates known problem.

Google fixes problem for you (and them).

What’s your point?

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OK, we admit it. Under the hood, the iPhone X is a feat of engineering

Lord Elpuss
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Re: 20 layers you say.

@John Smith 19

"Sorry not really impressed... ...People were doing 50 layers for mainframes in the early 80's..."

Just a slight bit of difference between 50 layers in a mainframe the size of a family saloon car, and 20 layers in a single PCB less than 1mm thick. Also, a 1980s IBM System/36 5360 CPU was manufactured with a 405nm track width on a 16" x 24" board, as opposed to the Apple A11 Bionic's 8nm track width, on a board less than 1.5" x 0.75", and then 20 layers deep.

Sounds slightly more impressive when put like that, doesn't it.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Hell froze over

Aaaaaand that would be bullshit, bullshit and more bullshit. On a roll there, AC!

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Hey, you know why it's called the iPhone X? When you see Apple's repair bill, your response will be X-rated

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Why? Because Apple

Nokia 8800 Scirocco was $1000 at launch as well. It's not an Apple thing, it's a Fashion thing.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: $1000 for a phone

Why do people keep making out that ridiculously expensive fashion phones are a 'new' thing? The Nokia 8800 Scirocco cost $1000 at launch, that was for the 'normal' model and that was way back in 2007.

It's a fashion phone. You don't need it, nobody does. It's $300 for the phone, and $700 for the image - and some people are happy to pay that.

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Lord Elpuss
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For the sake of balance...

A replacement screen for the Galaxy S8 costs between $200 and $300 depending on where you get the repair done. Expensive OLED screens are expensive. Natch.

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Go on IBMers, tell us what you really think

Lord Elpuss
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Re: In the words of the PFY...

My money’s on Dave.

One of my favorites ;)

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: I don't mind

@AC I was a contractor at IBM 1995-2001 (Based in Hursley but spent most of my time in Bedfont Lakes), with a 1-year secondment to a business partner in 1999. I moved across to the same partner in 2001. I now work for myself, but am still involved in the IBM ecosystem; and yes an awful lot has changed. In fact, when my partner secondment ended in 2000, I almost didn't recognise the company I came back to.

I still stay in touch with a lot of current and ex-IBMers, and they tell me the company is changing now faster than ever. From the people I talk to, IBMers are divided into 3 groups; the old guard who remember how it used to be (they're eternally disappointed in the company as it exists today), the new joiners who came on board in the last 5 years or so (they're generally positive, although they don't feel any loyalty and only stay as long as their compensation package remains viable), and managers. Managers tend to be one of two types; Excellent (usually those that came out of the field and worked their way up), or catastrophically bad. I don't recall any 'average' managers.

Innovation is an interesting one. Deep down I believe IBM still does innovation; some of the fintech/healthtech/blockchain stuff is really interesting and Watson is starting to show some real potential in the deep learning/cognitive arena, but in general IBM innovation is either massively undersold (nobody knows it exists) or massively oversold (a 'decent' product in alpha/beta form is presented as completely finished, world-changing and revolutionary, which inevitably disappoints).

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: I don't mind

If that's all that comes to mind, then I'm sorry for you. I spent a good few years working with and around IBM, it's a truly gigantic company with good parts, great parts and crap parts. Like pretty much every other Gigantocorp. One thing I do remember is that the people at ground level were amazing; I never met an IBMer I didn't respect or couldn't get on with.

IBM was also, unlike it's peers at the time, willing to change and learn. You told them something was crap, and they're move heaven and earth to make it better. Didn't always work, but if it didn't it wasn't because they didn't do their damnedest to fix it.

Fond memories here.

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Malware hidden in vid app is so nasty, victims should wipe their Macs

Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

@AC You're either unwilling or unable to grasp basic concepts of how coding works in modern systems, and I don't get paid enough to teach you. So I'm out of this discussion now, and I'll just leave you with these wise words from Col. Nathan R Codemonkey, Senior Programmer, Guantanamo Software House, Cuba.

Senior programmer: I'll answer the question. You want answers?

Junior Programmer: I think I'm entitled to them.

Senior programmer: You want answers?!

Junior Programmer: I want the truth!

Senior programmer: You can't handle the truth!

Son, we live with software that has holes, and those holes have to be found and closed by men with serious skills. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Anonymous Coward? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for the state of software security, and you curse those who spend their lives trying to harden it. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know -- that software vulnerabilities, while tragic, are inevitable in complex software; and my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, makes it as safe as it can be.

You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you WANT me scanning your code -- you NEED me scanning your code.

We use words like “Token,” “Fuzzing,” “Exploit.” We use these words as the backbone of a life spent in penetration testing. You use them as a punch line.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who downloads porn and watches cat videos under the blanket of the very protection that I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it.

I would rather that you just said "thank you" and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a keyboard and stand to post. Either way, I don't give a DAMN what you think you're entitled to!

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

"So by this point I've already proven that either your code makes a "hello world" program look complex, or your code has bugs. You may get most of them before shipping, but unless your code is very trivial you're stuffed."

^ This.

"And also true there are managers who want products shipped as soon as possible, however repeat business comes from having a product that's good enough - if your customers really hate what you're doing then you're not getting them back."

And ^ This.

"Actually no, I think the few people out there like you are the problem. Really, you can, on your own, code an entire OS, plus application suite, plus build the computer - and all of this non-trivial and secure and bug-free?

Absolute rubbish."

And most definitely ^ This.

Kiwi gets it. One point I would add (and then I really need to get off this discussion and do some work) is that even if code is written 100% bug-free, that doesn't necessarily make it secure - it only means it will do what it's designed to do when all parameters are as-expected. A hacker isn't interested in what code should do, he's interested in what it can do - e.g. what happens when it (or the sandbox, or the OS, or the abstraction layer) is fed bogus or unexpected parameters which cause the code to flip and open up a hole. This is what makes fuzzing such a useful technique.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

&AC

I’ve been at a conference where they held a ‘Hack the (Hello) World’ competition; to do exactly what you suggest. Used a buffer overrun and a memory injection attack via the graphics card - I still have the presentation somewhere. Needed physical proximity to the target device plus knowledge of the internals, but did end up printing rude words to the screen whilst reporting back to the program that it said ‘Hello World’.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

”" the idiotards are out in force today"<br/><br/>

Classy! Perhaps youtube is more your kind of thing?“

You’re right. My apologies. Spent the day dealing with ‘challenging’ users yesterday and allowed my frustrations to boil over into this discussion. Won’t happen again.

Cheers LE

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: A complete wipe?

"Doesn't always work - especially in heavily-proxied corporate environments."

Well, I would guess that if you're in a heavily proxied corporate environment then you have an IT department who can presumably deal with the issue for you - in our case, that would typically mean they give the user a new laptop from stock and reflash/zero the old one at their leisure.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

"False. It doesn't as a company is not only likely to offer BS, it's economically bound to offer BS as it's the cheapest they can get."

Fuck me, the idiotards are out in force today. Go and study Economics 101; a product needs to be of some kind of quality in order to sell at all - if it's complete shit, nobody will buy it and the company that makes it will go out of business.

Profitability is always a balance between what the customer will pay, and what the company needs to spend in order to convince them to part with their wedge. It needs to be just good enough - and yes, that involves fucking security.

Your answer to (b) doesn't make any kind of sense in any universe.

E-, must try harder.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

"Companies are in it for profits and your security isn't even on the list of items to consider."

Security is always a component of the profit equation. A product which is unsatisfactory in terms of security (in the consumer's eyes) will not sell as well as one which is satisfactorily secure, hence reduced profits, hence the company will care enough just enough about security to make sure the product sells. It's true that a company will not invest more money in security than is strictly necessary to continue to sell the product, but to claim security isn't even on the list of items to consider is patently absurd.

"The less secure you are, the more company can demolish your privacy to collect juicy tidbits about you to sell"

You're conflating security and privacy. Violating your privacy may be considered an acceptable tradeoff (usually in exchange for a 'free' product, see Android), vicariously violating your security means they'll lose all their customers and ultimately go out of business. What a mind-blowingly daft statement.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

"There is no guarantee whatsoever..."

There never is. Who suggested there was?

From a statistical probability perspective, my reasoning stands. For any given product (Smart TV, IoT, Operating System, Car...) of any significant complexity, you're far more likely to be better off if that code is written by a company that has (a) the resources to do a good job of hardening it, and (b) the customer base to make them care. One person writing one-off code from scratch (and thinking they can do it better than every TLA or miscreant out there) - now that's simplistic and naïve.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: Perhaps developers should work offline

"My code has never been exploited and has never needed any updates, this simply because it was bespoke i.e. different for each customer and all written with the old computing definition of security in mind."

Your arrogance will get you killed, son. Well, your code anyways.

Generally speaking, code written from scratch by one individual will be less secure than commercial code written by a large software house. Large companies have the time and resources to dedicate to security, and the customer base to make fixing bugs worth their while -as opposed to simply moving on with the next victim customer.

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Lord Elpuss
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Re: A complete wipe?

So explicitly choose it.

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Please activate the anti-ransomware protection in your Windows 10 Fall Creators Update PC. Ta

Lord Elpuss
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Re: For some reason...

”I always seem to misread Windows 10 Fail creators update.“

How is that misreading?

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