* Posts by Hans 1

3120 posts • joined 11 Aug 2009

What's all the C Plus Fuss? Bjarne Stroustrup warns of dangerous future plans for his C++

Hans 1
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Happy

there is hardly any feature I wouldn’t do somewhat differently if I had to do it again.

Anybody who has ever written code would say this, too!

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Developer’s code worked, but not in the right century

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Holmes

How come this is not working, must be the compiler's or interpreter's fault ...

Running anything in production without a proper testing in test environment is a big no, no, no.

Does running something again when you get something unexpected seem like a bad idea?

Or is this just me?

It is a good idea, PROVIDED:

1. You are in dev or test environment

2. You have debug statements in your code and forgot to enable them on the first run or simply want to ensure one can safely run the program multiple times. There are certainly other cases as well ...

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Hans 1
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timestamp is a date format

@Katrinab

1. Nope, those are timestamps! They are usually [milli]seconds since, NOT days.

2. 2nd January 1904? (Mac) ? That was up until Mac OS 9 (aka 2000), Mac OS X and macOS use UNIX timestamps.

Maybe The Register can come up with its own special timestamp ? Milliseconds since el'Reg started ?

A date format is, for example, [joke]dd/MM/yyyy in the civilized and MM/dd/yyyy in the uncivilized world. Some heretics also like to use dd.MM.yyyy. l33ts use yyyyMMdd.[/joke]

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Office 365 celebrates National Beer Day by popping out for a pint

Hans 1
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Windows

Re: Speaking of "matey" error messages

Actually, I think Windows has dissociative identity disorder with "Universal Windows Platform" and "Desktop" apps, so it logically refers to itself as we.

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Hans 1
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Windows

Re: About Time MS were taken to task

It clearly isn't available 365 days a year and is therefore not as it says on the 'tin'

Yeah, more like 340 and counting, still much better than last year ... it had reached 320 by summer, iirc ... Of course, that is calculated as 365 - <#_days_with_TITSUPs>

Then again, poor Redmond has to put up with piss poor Windows Update behavior, the constant reboots and shit because it only just patched the systems ... so ... yeah ... I think MS deserve a little bit of empathy, at this point. Let's all try very, very, very hard ...

Segmentation fault

Well, :D

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Hans 1
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Joke

Re: Speaking of "matey" error messages

They have detected a bipolar user, maybe ?

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Wires, chips, and LEDs: US trade bigwigs detail Chinese kit that's going to cost a lot more

Hans 1
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Re: War, what is it good for?

I think chat all this boils down to is Trump either has forgotten that the US has a reserve currency OR he des not understand what that means.

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Microsoft tries cutting the Ribbon in Office UI upgrade

Hans 1
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Re: Why do I smell...

Most users simply give up rather than play Hide and Seek.

No, I use the search field to search the option. I can hardly ever find Language in Outlook, for example, so each time I need it, I have to use search ... that was JUST ONE example among many others ...

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June 2018, and Windows Server can be pwned with a DNS request

Hans 1
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Windows

Re: Decades of Code-Review Opportunity

why can't Microsoft get better at finding these things when they have all the source code?

Remember when some Windows 2000 source code got leaked ? It was a complete unintelligible clusterfuck. They cannot start from scratch as they need backward compatibility, whole parts of the OS have not been touched in decades. Windows XP apparently had 40 million lines of code without third-party drivers! I assume Windows 10 has an order of magnitude more. And, given the skill of Microsoft developers one can witness in the open source code MS releases, thinking about that rm /bin/sh idiocy, I doubt the code is any good ... it works, sort of ... but that is about it.

How hard can it be to design an update mechanism ? Why does Windows update take ages to find what needs updating, why does it install updates and ask you to reboot, then finishes updating on shutdown and AGAIN on startup, then reboots again ? We will never know because they are too ashamed of themselves to show us their code ...

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Hans 1
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2018 and Windows Server can be 0wned by a DNS or HTTP packet

It’s also something that could be easily scripted. This means there’s a system-level bug in a listening service on critical infrastructure servers, which also means this is wormable.

This looks bloody enough, but what about http.sys ?

Thank Feynman nobody is silly enough to hook up a Windows Server with IIS to the internet, right ?

Remember, http.sys is a kernel mode device driver, and it can be owned by a malformed packet ???

If you really have to use Windows server, install a 3rdparty web server, there are many available ... running as a user with minimal privileges ... all software gets 0wned, but only Novell and Microsoft would attempt to validate 3rdparty packets in kernel space ... and Novell stopped doing that decades ago ...

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Microsoft loves Linux so much its R Open install script rm'd /bin/sh

Hans 1
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Holmes

Thank Feynman Windows is closed source!

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Hans 1
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chmod 777

You can see that all over the intertubes... now, Xenix did not have the "-R" switch on chmod so they needed the find.

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Keep your hands on the f*cking wheel! New Tesla update like being taught to drive by your dad

Hans 1
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FAIL

Re: Crash Test Dummies.

It's shocking really as Tesla are doing a massive beta test with this software, and someone has died as a consequence. And they then try to blame that person.

That person did not have hands on wheel and eyes on road, blame Tesla all you like, he did not follow instructions.

I do agree, Tesla drivers are alpha testers, yes ...

I also think Elon is a bit too optimistic, autonomous driving will take years of development still, and years of highway maintenance work ...

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Hans 1
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WTF?

The autopilot is not an autopilot ?

What the f*ck, YES IT IS JUST THAT.

The problem is, people confuse autonomous drive with autopilot.

In an aircraft, the autopilot will not avoid flocks of birds, for example, the human pilot can, provided he sees them soon enough to react.

Tesla announced a new roadster last year, overhyped sure (not here or I missed an article), but, apparently, 620 miles range, 0-60 mph in 1.9 seconds and 250 mph top speed (that is just the base model!) ... you better keep both AND your hands on that wheel AND your eyes on the road ...

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No fandango for you: EU boots UK off Galileo satellite project

Hans 1
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Unhappy

Re: EU Are Being Vindictive

We HAVE paid for it, so we should be able to USE it.

I agree, who we're gonna call ?

They have the say, we don't, sad and unfair all we want, they do not want other nations to follow suit so will milk us to the bone, in a sense they have no choice, either ... Whose fault ? Ours, sadly ...

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Hans 1
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: If not doing something because it was "inconvenient" was the ciriteria for Brexit..

a full refund (with interest) would be well in order.

Hm, right!

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Hans 1
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Facepalm

Re: Well

The only pity is the spineless and incompetent tossers we have "negotiating" on our side.

I have written here many times BEFORE the referendum that you will not get to pick and choose, nor negotiate anything ... why ? The EU does not need the UK, the UK needs the EU!

There is no such thing as a negotiation, there are treaties and laws in place, the EU has said AGAIN, AGAIN, AND AGAIN, that British government is living in fantasy land, the UK has ABSOLUTELY NO LEG TO STAND ON, the EU will not make a special deal with the UK, it has already taken over our financial sector (cf passporting rights have been denied, so is already happening as I type), it will take our aircraft industry, or what is left of it, elsewhere, I heard Spain were eager ... we shall see ...

[...]

UK: We do not want single market.

EU: Thank you so much for your financial sector, that was quite a treat!

UK: You're welcome, BTW, we want no customs union, either!

EU: Well, tough, that ... now, where's your industry, please ? Thanks!

I had already outlined this time and time again prior to the vote and the leavers were all "You do not know what you are talking about, we'll make a deal!!"

I appear to have been right all along, for once :D

PS: I was disenfranchised so could not vote ... if that matters ...

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Hans 1
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Joke

Re: Dictionary anyone?

RULE BRITANNIA, BRITANNIA RULE THE WAVES

RULE, BRITANNIA! RULE over England and Wales, only, as Scotland and Norther Ireland are poised to leave the kingdom ...

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Tesla undecimates its workforce but Elon insists everything's absolutely fine

Hans 1
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Re: Undecimate?

They are not correct.

They are wrong ? No, both are right!

Basically, undecimate is a pun, a clever pun at that, imho!

Language relies on context, is rich and ever evolving. The word "decimate" can mean any of Websters definitions. The word decimate comes from the latin decimus, a tenth, and undecimus means, you guessed it, an eleventh.

El'Reg cleverly took one meaning of decimate, noticed an off by one error and hence came up with undecimate, which, ironically, also means the contrary -> El'Reg loves these pun's and so do I, one of the reasons I read their articles ... the other being above average technical boffinry in the tech journalism world and their cos^Hmic units of measure!

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Nominet throws out US corp's attempt to seize Brit domain names

Hans 1
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: Tucows One Goat?

How did Tucows survive the Internet bubble ???

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Microsoft pulls the plug on Windows 7, 8.1 support forums

Hans 1
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Windows

How about the OneDrive forums?

OneDrive forums will be archived in July-August ...

https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/onedrive/forum/odfeatures/changes-in-onedrive-forum-on-microsoft-community/5bdb57e1-e86c-440b-b766-23ecc2baa2d0

Is this OneDrive, OneDrive Groups, OneDrive for Business or Sharepoint ? I dunno ...

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Have to use SMB 1.0? Windows 10 April 2018 Update says NO

Hans 1
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smb 1

Got told off the other day by IT, had uninstalled anti-virus to upgrade to 1803^H4^H5.

They asked me to reinstall asap, but I could not reach file server, since I had disabled SMBv1 forcefully... and it was running the obsolete protocol...

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Oddly enough, when a Tesla accelerates at a barrier, someone dies: Autopilot report lands

Hans 1
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: OlaM

Autopilot on planes is simple.

You are joking, right ? Do you have any idea of the sheer number of flight parameters there are on an aircraft ? Ever heard of lift, roll, pitch, yaw, stall, altitude, air density, thrust...?

On modern aircraft, an autopilot can land the bloody thing - OF COURSE, PILOT MUST BE READY TO TAKE OVER ANYTIME, because unexpected things can and will happen, most likely at the worst possible moment. It is called Murphy's law ... the most important law of nature for aviation engineers, pilots, and now Tesla drivers, so it seems.

Tesla is 100% right, the driver was careless when the accident happened, was NOT ready to take control of his car. Yes, USian highway maintenance shares some of the blame too ... but, behind the wheel, you are responsible for your car. Yes, Tesla autopilot is nice to have, on USian highways probably not as useful as in Europe ... certainly NOT a replacement for a driver, though.

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Hans 1
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Facepalm

Re: Self Preservation mode

encouraged by the name and marketing, owners think [...]

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Its a glorified cruise control. Calling it "Autopilot" vastly overstates its abilities and lulls drivers into a false sense of security.

It does not matter what people think, with an autopilot in an aircraft the pilot must stay in position, be ready to take over anytime. People SHOULD KNOW.

It is rather dumb that people think autopilot means autonomous driving when it does not. You are supposed to keep your hands on the wheel AND your eyes on the road. You can move your feet away from the pedals and enjoy the ride, HOWEVER, keep hands on wheel and eyes on the road.

Reminds me of the story of a camping car driver who thought cruise control was autonomous driving, engaged it and went to the kitchen for a nice hot coffee .... or wing mirrors which mention "objects in (the) mirror are closer than they appear" No f'ing shit Sherlock ...

You get a car, you work out what options it has AND what these do PRIOR TO USING THEM.

The world cannot save all cretins, we are all trying very hard, but, you know, some are just beyond help. You can rename the option to super cruise control or whatever, there will always be cretins who think it means autonomous driving.

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Automation won’t take your job until the next recession threatens it

Hans 1
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WTF?

Late to the game ?

Good news! Automation capable of erasing white collar jobs is coming, but not for a decade or more..

We have been selling software capable or replacing white collars for years, mind, afaik, no one got fired because of it at our customers, customers did cancel some outsourcing contracts, though ;-).

Customers use it to free time of those experienced white collars so they can concentrate on quality, or so I am told ...

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1,300 customers of Brit bank TSB defrauded due to botched IT migration

Hans 1
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Coat

Re: Another false claim...

@Tom Paine

I would buy an edible hat if I were you, his yachting/golfer mates will soon find him some other highly paid job ideal for an ignorant and lazy of his kind.

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I see a satellite of a man ... Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, that's now 4 sats fit to go

Hans 1
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Happy

Re: What's the point of this?

Mr codejunky

For decades, until about 1994, the Bundeswehr and Luftwaffe were limited to the defense at its borders, exclusively. Germany would support the coalition financially in the first Gulf war, for example.

Since, the situation has changed, slightly - they are now allowed to "defend" Germany even outside of their borders. Besides, why do you take the most peaceful army in the EU, apart from Austria ?

France, for example, has quite a substantial airforce.

Maybe you read into the "Der Spiegel" article to single out the Luftwaffe, which claimed that less than a dozen aircraft were combat ready due to a mechanical problem plaguing the Eurofighters; the Luftwaffe did not wish to comment on the number of combat ready fighters. You forget that the Luftwaffe also has a fleet of Tornados. Also, although the mechanical troubles are real, the numbers appear to be press exaggeration, they damn well know the Luftwaffe cannot say how many fighters are combat ready. The Luftwaffe just commented that there were more combat-ready Eurofighter aircraft now than what was divulged to parliament last year (so 50+).

And Dr_N quite rightly pointed out the fact that the RAF cannot even repair its own aircraft and needs cooperation from Turkey, of all NATO allies, Turkey ???? So, as a Brit, one first needs to sweep ones doorstep before one comments on the neighbour's ... assuming our codejunky is a Brit, of course, deepest apologies if you are not, I did not mean to insult.

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Hans 1
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Facepalm

What I find extraordinarily funny, here, is that the UK treated the EU like shit, much more so its vassal states in the Empire back then and somehow thinks that the EU is open to ever more negotiation, will allow cherry-picking and the nations in the commonwealth will somehow get amnesia... does nobody in the UK remember the cotton BS you enforced on India (+Pakistan, +Bangladesh) in a not too distant past ? You think they'll go, "Hey, lords, why do we not do that again, it was cool for us to get treated like shit ?"

You really think the UK can compete with Indian or Pakistani wages ?

I dunno, I just dunno ... beyond help.

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Hans 1
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Happy

Re: What's in a name?

Well, since I am British, a British Hans ... Hans is OK by me ... then again, we will probably keep Patrick and replace the Union Jack with trídhathach na hÉireann on the vessel ... would make them more than happy ... as for the Hans hands pun, well ... it is getting old ... but I really like this one:

When I get out of my car, it is Hans-free.

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Nadella tells worried GitHub devs: Judge us by our actions

Hans 1
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WTF?

Re: Open source skype

NOBODY in their right mind would want comms software with a two-tier architecture. Are you *ffing nuts ? Man in da middle BY DESIGN.

MS' introduction of a two tier architecture for Skype turned the software into potential spy or slurpware, nobody knows since it is proprietary software.

Back to the topic: Github will follow Yammer ...

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Hans 1
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Thumb Up

Re: "Judge us by our actions"

@King Jack

[...]The same turd that gave a choice of 'install now' or 'install later' with no option not to?

You forgot the most recent Windows 10 1803^H4^H5 update:

Choose one of the following two options:

Allow extended Slurp ?

Allow Slurp ?

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TSB meltdown latest: Facepalming reaches critical mass as Brits get strangers' bank letters

Hans 1
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Unhappy

Your third-party supplier whose actions you are responsible for?

Worse, still, TSB, I do hope you got approval from your customers for the sharing of personal data with those third parties, obviously inline with GDPR, right ?

I seriously cannot see how they can get out of this mess, I know they have to somehow (they are a bank), but Feynman ...

Icon: feel sorry for customers

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Send printer ink, please. More again please, and fast. Now send it faster

Hans 1
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FAIL

Re: Reminds me of French sales

Then ask for two more bottles, uncorked. One for your cellar and one to keep the customer happy/quiet.

It is because of dickheads like these that now we have to fill out ever more paperwork for a simple meal ... like, who was attending ? Oh, I see, what was Y doing there ? Why did you have Cognac ? Three beers each at the pub after that, why ?

When a $400 night out managed to secure $200k more in new contracts for an existing client ... whatever, does not matter, we still have to answer stupid questions like that .... Merci, hein! It is easier to bullshit a customer who has downed one too many ... then again, according to our customers, our ROI is actually very good, so ... but I digress ...

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It's all true – I bribed big city's IT boss with fat bathroom bungs, admits tech biz chief exec

Hans 1
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Happy

I would have thought given the rates various UK IT companies charge their staff out at, this figure doesn't seem unreasonable given it is circa £70 per hour.

Indeed, and even that is low if you are looking for scarce experts in a given field for contract work, like experts in some specialized proprietary piece of software.

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Platinum partner had 'affair' with my wife – then Oracle screwed me, ex-sales boss claims

Hans 1
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Unhappy

What a lovely place to work, hey ?

cf title

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Half of all Windows 10 users thought: BSOD it, let's get the latest build

Hans 1
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Happy

A machine that has been working for months with no problems starts having BSOD problems, installing the latest build mysteriously fixes it. Anyone would think Microsoft are doing it on purpose.

Well, I have the opposite on one of my boxes ... system worked fine for months, then with 1803 it does not like waking from sleep, I tell ya! 1/3 it freezes even before I see the MS spinning balls ... this is one of the better new features in 1803^H4^H5 ... because I can get to Linux quicker ;-)

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Max Schrems is back: Facebook, Google hit with GDPR complaint

Hans 1
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microsoft?

Has Max Schrems upgraded to windows 10 1803, yet, Because, well, you can choose between slurp or slurp, "no slurp" is NOT an option... this gonna get bloody!

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Hans 1
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Re: he is missing the lowest hanging fruit

Exactly! If a user des not want his data stored, how do you ensure that??? You need to know which users don't want their data stored, else, you have to ask every time defeating the purpose... at some point, user Will give consent...

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Zuckerberg gets a night off: Much-hyped Euro grilling was all smoke, absolutely no heat

Hans 1
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Windows

Farage only turns up if there's a chance he'll be on camera. The media whore.

Well, actually, he turned up to complain about the "censorship" of "fake news" which led to his page losing 25% of traffic. Selfish, as usual ...

By the way, the French bloke that came after the Nigel was from the National Front, complaining about the banning of his "alt-right" neo-nazi mates from Génération Identitaire.

Defend Europe crowdfunded more than $178,000 to charter a ship in the Mediterranean. Its intention was ferry any rescued migrants back to Africa, observe any incursions by other NGO ships into Libyan waters and report them to the Libyan coastguard. In the event, the ship chartered by Génération Identitaire suffered an engine failure, and had to be rescued by a ship from one of the NGOs rescuing migrants.

Icon, cause he mentioned his mate Tramp as well...

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Hans 1
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Paris Hilton

You give him the choice and he buries himself. He did not answer the questions, everybody can see this ... and the EU is thinking about breaking up facebook, starts to look bloody.

Note that those who blame the EU should listen to the conservative MEP from the UK who asked a few dull questions ...

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FBI's flawed phone tally blamed on programming error. 7,800 unbreakable mobes? Er, um...

Hans 1
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Joke

News from Lagos

Dear sir,

Building a legal backdoor that is open only to law enforcement is very, very, very hard and will require substantive efforts to be made. It has to meet regulatory regulations [sic] in multiple jurisdictions across the globe. For a complete solution, we expect design, development, testing, and release to cost $500 000 (FIVE HUNDRED MILLION US DOLLARS) and take 2 years to deliver.

Please provide us with $20 000 (TWENTY THOUSAND US DOLLARS) and our attached NDA, signed, in exchange of which we will provide you with a regulation-complying quote, including a cut-down of expenses and expected time-frame of delivery.

Yours sincerely,

Lagos Dev Club

Senator Peter Lawless

153, Lagos way

Lagos

Nigeria

PS: the person and address data mentioned herein is fictions, for those who cannot parse the joke icon.

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This post has been deleted by a moderator

Greenwich uni fined £120k: Hole in computing school site leaked 20k people's data

Hans 1
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WTF?

Re: So a computing department

hopefully he / she isn't involved with anything remotely important

Ok, a student made a silly mistake in 2000, years back, when data protection awareness was not really the thing it is today. Again, a student, aka somebody training to become an expert, made a mistake. I guess you are already all-knowing and never make any ?

An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made, in a narrow field.

I would not blame the student, but the university, because, well, that site should have been put to rest two decades ago, almost, when its purpose was fulfilled (the event was over).

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1.5m Brits pay too much for mobile and crappy broadband – Ofcom

Hans 1
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Holmes

1.5m Brits pay too much for mobile and crappy broadband

Then, when I claim you pay too much, I get bullshit like ISP's mobile providers need to rely on roaming fees and cannot do without .... my provider is doing fine, included roaming BEFORE the EU imposed it, is cheaper than ANYTHING you can find in the UK, operates in a country that is greater, in terms of km², than the UK, so more expensive when you consider antennas for coverage.

IN THE UK, YOU ARE BEING MILKED, no ifs, buts, or maybes ...

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Lawyers for Marcus Hutchins: His 'I made malware' jail phone call isn't proper evidence

Hans 1
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Big Brother

The irony of the Miranda warning is that the US lacks courts of law ...

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UK has rejected over 1,000 skilled IT bod visa applications this year

Hans 1
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WTF?

Re: Wait...

taking back control if our borders!

Hm, ok, but, can you tell me, is the UK in Schengen, then ?

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UPnP joins the 'just turn it off on consumer devices, already' club

Hans 1
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Re: Doctor, where have you been all this time ?

If you weren't turning off UPnP from day one, you're an idiot.

If you weren't turning off UPnP from day one, you're a n00b.

TFTFY

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Hans 1
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Holmes

Doctor, where have you been all this time ?

UPnP joins the 'just turn it off on consumer devices, already' club

A bit late to the party, it has always been in that club, even before the first implementations were tested, the whole idea of UPnP is just silly!

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How many ways can a PDF mess up your PC? 47 in this Adobe update alone

Hans 1
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Happy

Photoshop ?

Security reasearchers finally looking at Photoshop ? This will turn to be as bloody as Flash and Acrobat!

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Hans 1
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Re: Well...

Dear Mr Berger,

I read your comment and was about to upvote when I came to this:

Actually today the ideal language for something like a PDF reader might actually be Delphi.

Crikey, NO! TurboPascal is nice for teens to learn how to program, that is all, though ... ;-) Nothing to do in a professional piece of software. I think we might have already discussed this on stackoverflow ? There cannot be more than one Delphi fanboy in this solar system, right ?

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