* Posts by hplasm

5610 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

SpaceX yoinks $96m GPS launch deal from under ULA's nose

hplasm
Happy

Re: reusable rockets

"Mid-air nabbing of a rocket has the James Bond villain vibe you might expect from Musk."

ULA rocket goes up, ULA engines paracute down... SpaceX giant Quadcopter swoops in...

cue Bond music...

hplasm
Headmaster

Re: Wait, we CAN'T overcharge you any more? UNFAIR!

"...allot cheaper."

Once is alittle mistake. Twice, however....

National Insurance tax U-turn: Philip Hammond nixes NIC uptick

hplasm
Devil

This lady's not for turning!

Neither is this one... oh look!

Again!

Oracle gives FCC a great big sloppy kiss: You're doing a great job axing net neutrality, privacy

hplasm
Devil

Re: Yes Kieren

Oh for the day when we are free of Oracle's odious meddling...

hplasm
Unhappy

Re: Bit of an eejit but..

"It feels like sanity is going to become the new fundamentalism"

It seems to me that insanity IS the new fundamentalism. Emphasis on the mental

Time crystals really do exist, say physicists*

hplasm
Coat

How many Time Crystals are required...

...to make a Time Cube?

This is where UK's Navy will park its 65,000-tonne aircraft carriers

hplasm
Unhappy

"...a local transformer which takes it up from the standard 50Hz to the carriers’ 60Hz..."

What is this sorcery?

BOAR-ZILLA stalks Fukushima's dead zone

hplasm
Coat

Re: Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

"And I wonder what could be the superpowers of a Superboar..."

They can talk the hind legs off an Arcrurian Megadonkey. Oh Boar, you say...?

Brit ISP TalkTalk blocks control tool TeamViewer

hplasm
Coat

Re: Talk Talk should just progressively block more and more traffic...

"another thumb down?? who is this person? come on, explain!"

Er, Dido summat springs to mind. Crazy Ex...

That CIA exploit list in full: The good, the bad, and the very ugly

hplasm
Boffin

Re: Slightly off topic...

You will either need a non-switch hub that you can use to tap the lead from the device of interest; or the switch that it is connected to, if better than base level, would need to support port spanning, that can direct the target's port traffic to your Wireshark PC's port.

HTH

Fancy that – the sharing economy lobby doesn't speak for the sharers

hplasm
Meh

Target for Downsizing?

Perhaps the CBI could be downsized, as per the British 'Industry' they so obviously no longer represent.

Troughers.

Shopping for PCs? Ding, dong, the Dock is dead in 2017's new models

hplasm
Meh

IIf wishes were donkeys...

"...a brainless laptop that relies on an HP phone to push Windows 10 onto its screen."

Powered by Unicorn farts and communicates by Rainbows.

Watt the f... Dim smart meters caught simply making up readings

hplasm
Happy

Re: Meter smarts

"Those are gas meters, not electrical meters in the accompanying photo."

Don't get started on those...

Don't worry, slowpoke Microsoft, we patched Windows bug for you, brags security biz

hplasm
Paris Hilton

Opatch Windows...

Or Ditch Windows...?

Decisions, decisions...

Linus Torvalds lashes devs who 'screw all the rules and processes' and send him 'crap'

hplasm
Facepalm

Re: Linus Torvalds or Donald Trump?

"I couldn't tell! Both are idiots who can't control their mouths."

Said an idiot.

hplasm
Happy

Re: Which bridge is being repaired today ?

The bridge is being 'updated' and will reboot 17 times today.

hplasm
Gimp

Re: "If you are stupid enough to try and ship code that does not build"

"Except that MS paid its developers rather than depending on charity donations of time from them."

They were robbed.

hplasm
Windows

Aw Diddums...

Stick to Win 10. It sounds just made for you.

Passport and binary tree code, please: CompSci quizzes at US border just business as usual

hplasm
Devil

Re: @Valarian

"They're gauging your reaction at the request itself."

I would like to see their reaction when I try to bill them...

hplasm
Holmes

Re: No issues visiting India

"If the US was so bad... why so many trying to get in?"

Apparently to kill all of the natives.

Silicon Valley tech bro's solution for homeless: Getting himself in the news. Again.

hplasm
Devil

Re: America loves Guns and has chosen a Totalitarian government

"Round up the ... mentally unwell ..."

Then what do you do for a Government?

Frustrated by reboot-happy Windows 10? Creators Update hopes to take away the pain

hplasm
Windows

Re: I don't understand....

"But it does look like you've got some PCs there that should be running a server level OS. "

Not Windows, then.

hplasm
Gimp

Re: Holding post

Makes it easier to read the other, irrelevant comments.

FTFY.

Dyson backs Britain plc with $2.5bn AI and robotics investment

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Airblade, airfield, airware

"Apparently across the room and splattering germs on other people."

Or you could try, well, actually washing your hands before using it...

CloudPets' woes worsen: Webpages can turn kids' stuffed toys into creepy audio bugs

hplasm
Happy

That bear...

... does he work for the Government?

Said Mr Gruber.

Germany, France lobby hard for terror-busting encryption backdoors – Europe seems to agree

hplasm
Meh

Re: Getting bored of pointing this out

" 'Minimise the State' seems to be perceived as more of a Right position"

As in- "THIS IS OURS NOW- KEEP OUT."

Gov wants to make the UK the 'safest place in the world to go online'

hplasm
Meh

"Gov wants to make the UK the 'safest place in the world to go online"

Tell them to leave it alone, then.

Google's Project Zero reveals another Microsoft flaw

hplasm
Gimp

Re: Is this the same Google that is still unable to update Android?

Your Waaaambulance is here.

Don't forget your coat and mask.

New UK laws address driverless cars insurance and liability

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Driverless Upgrades

"...legal madness ..."

The one with no cure.

Elon Musk promises Tesla investors Trump won't send him to Mars

hplasm
Happy

Re: At Tesla forever?

"...they are going to download his consciousness into a Tesla S..."

...and send his ass to Mars.

Radioactive leak riddle: Now Team America sniffs Europe's skies for iodine isotope source

hplasm
Coat

Re: poor Sweden

"hang on, is this the incident Donaeld was talking about the other day?"

That was Al-IKEA...

(thanks P-Eye)

Meet the chap open-sourcing US govt code – Paul, an ex-Microsoft anti-piracy engineer

hplasm
Coat

Re: Manure as construction material?

"So some buildings will be a non-steaming pile when completed?"

Excellent- dump a load on the Chernobyl reactor!

Is your child a hacker? Liverpudlian parents get warning signs checklist

hplasm
Meh

Re:This isn't a list to describe Facebook users?

No.

That would say:-

Has your child:

A vacuous expression on their face?

Walked into objects, or into the road whilst on their phone?

Ignored people talking to them, rather than txting them?

Become rather stupid?

and so on...

New Royal Navy Wildcat helicopters can't transmit vital data

hplasm
Happy

Re: No problem

Find a BT homehub equipped house- apparently they are optimised to beam WIFI straight up in the air to waiting helicopters...

hplasm
Facepalm

WTF?

How did so many idiots get into positions of power?

The Idiocracy is all that is 'trickle down' it seems...

US visitors must hand over Twitter, Facebook handles by law – newbie Rep starts ball rolling

hplasm
Happy

Facebook Handle-

Allah's Snackbar. Best Hummus in the Middle East.

See how far that gets you...

Global IPv4 address drought: Seriously, we're done now. We're done

hplasm
Devil

IPV6...

It's the Esperanto of the Interwebs!

Talk of tech innovation is bullsh*t. Shut up and get the work done – says Linus Torvalds

hplasm
Coat

Re: Never mind the code quality, feel the "innovation."

There 's a FSM in the Kernel.

All hail his noodly appendage, may he bless the sauce code!

NASA picks three Martian wet patches for 2020 splashdown

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Fast rocket....

If there was a splashdown, then that would indicate water, so the probe wouldn't need to go...

Totally not-crazy billionaire Elon Musk: All of us – yes, even you – must become cyborgs

hplasm
Meh

Re: LOL

"...waiting for a computer to perform a successful bicycle kick..."

Why? There are plenty of meat-idiots to kick sportsballs, although AI footballers would be 1000x cheaper and probably more intelligent.

That guy using a Surface you keep seeing around town could be a spy

hplasm
Happy

Re: What special build are the spies using?

Linux -Surface Edition.

See- Secure Boot can be bypassed...!

hplasm
Big Brother

Like a worm eating its own tail...

Or as in this case, a worm with its head up its own arse.

Senator wants a piece of Pai: FCC boss blasted for ripping up schools, libraries internet report

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: you must know the drill by now . . .

"The 1% can only buy so much stuff from one another..."

Then, when they have all the money and stuff, they can get the slaves^H^H^H^H^H^H citizens to start on the giant pyramids, in return for food.

USMC: We want more F-35s per year than you Limeys will get in half a decade

hplasm
Unhappy

Re: Nice turn of phrase

Bottom line is we've had a very anaemic ramp

And our carriers do too- and an anaemic catapult.

hplasm
Devil

Re: Irrational

"and much slower"

Only on the straight - lose the F35s in the corners, like Harleys and AUDIs.

That's cute. AI and IoT need 'ethics regulation', mumbles Lib Dem baron

hplasm
Facepalm

Next debate in HOC-

Care and feeding of Unicorns- they're bound to turn up eventually.

Revealed: 'Suicide bomber Barbie' and other TSA quack science that cost $1.5 billion

hplasm
Coat

Re:Would it come with a warranty??

Yes- if it's still in once piece, you get your cash back...

hplasm
Happy

Re: Bah!

And we have a winner of the new Banner: subheading contest:-

The Register: Ah, fuck IT.

Cattle that fail, not pets that purr – the future of servers

hplasm
Unhappy

Gods!

The future, or at least this version of it, sounds boring.

More tech companies join anti-Trump battle, but why did some pay for his inauguration?

hplasm
Happy

Re: Breaking

Sir Humphrey- is that you, working in the US now?