* Posts by hplasm

4519 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Chap behind Godwin's law suspends his own rule for Charlottesville fascists: 'By all means, compare them to Nazis'

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Everything I don't like is a Nazi

"Is it dio-design or diode-sign or even di-ode-sign? Just wondered, whilst you're here.

My money is on dio-des-ign ...

0
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: Not a fan of white supremacists...

""Um when they march with brown shorts and ware swastika what do call them ?""

How about an air-strike?

Worked in Europe, eventually...

1
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Nazi is a slur anyway

:%s/khazi/nazi/g

0
0

She's arrived! HMS Queen Lizzie enters Portsmouth Naval Base

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Re: Garbage

"Also where are you getting Exocets for €100K? They're normally about €3M."

AliExpress.

15
0

Creepy backdoor found in NetSarang server management software

hplasm
Silver badge
Pirate

Re: It does look like the companies development and distribution servers have been compromised

"Set up a shadow file system in the registry"

next:

"Set up a shadow file system in SystemD"

Shudder...

9
1

WannaCry vanquisher Marcus Hutchins pleads not guilty to flogging banking trojan Kronos

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Re: Framed?

"Has he had a hand in this affair?"

Just a little one.

1
1

World's largest private submarine in mystery sink accident

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: But, but, but ..

It's 'whoosh whoosh whoosh'...

Sarcastic propellers overhead.

9
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: What's sixze got to do with it?

"I would of thought that was a major weak spot."

Second only to the grammar that has been crushed...

9
0

Kaspersky axes antitrust complaints against Microsoft after Windows giant vows to play nice

hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: In Time

We will be free of the CRAPWARE that is called Windows.

You're Welcome.

2
3
hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Get real everyone

MSFT is the only OS supplier than doesn't create profitable demand and writes and releases malware into the wild.

FTFY, Fanboi.

0
2

Don't buy Microsoft Surface gear: 25% will break after 2 years, says Consumer Reports

hplasm
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: "...we don't believe these findings..."

""Microsoft Surface Pro is designed and built with performance and reliability in mind,""

Just what they keep saying about their OS too...

Where's the burning pants icon?

11
0

Hey America! Your internet is going to be so much better this January

hplasm
Silver badge
Facepalm

When did El Reg, a once rather conservative British tabloid,

What??

22
0

Schoolboy bags $10,000 reward from Google with easy HTTP Host bypass

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: There are an infinite number of monkeys out there

"who are happy to pen test your network for peanuts."

Multitasking whilst writing Shakespeare?

5
0

Cancel the farewell party. Get back to work. That asteroid isn't going to hit Earth in October

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Re: Aim is improving.

Third attempt: 12 Million Light Years.

(Sorry El Reg- couldn't resist...)

5
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: damn

"> i'd ordered butt plugs and everything."

"WHY!"

Brown trousers are still at the dry-cleaners...

7
0

Revealed: The naughty tricks used by web ads to bypass blockers

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Re: On the other hand...

""Brisbanetimes.com.au I'm looking at you.""

No yer not! We think you have an ad-blocker!

33
0

Official: Windows for Workstations returns in Fall Creators Update

hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: What about auto-updates?

"I have half a dozen Windows 10 PCs and none - yes none - do this."

You really should update your Windows boxes regularly, you know.

26
5

US border cops must get warrants to search phones, devices – EFF

hplasm
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: Remote Desktop...

"Just take a new USB Live version of Linux with you,"

Or, I hate to say it - Windows To Go...

Ew.

2
2

Microsoft's Surface Pro 2017, unhinged: Luxury fondleslab that's good...

hplasm
Silver badge
Boffin

Re: "Does it run Mint?"

"911 prices, 911 bodywork, air-cooled Beetle engine."

ITYM

'911 prices, 911 bodywork, lame horse.'

(Nothing wrong with the air-cooled Beetle engine- the 911 has a 6 cylinder version.)

0
0

It's 2017 and Hyper-V can be pwned by a guest app, Windows by a search query, Office by...

hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Products have flaws,,,,

"So show me a OS that does that?"

You keep saying that, over and over, and yet the Windows turd remains unpolished.

3
1

HMS Queen Liz will arrive in Portsmouth soon, says MoD

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Re: ship design philosophy question

"Bridge and battle bridge to allow for saucer detachment."

...Lest the cup is destroyed in action.

It is a British ship...

3
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: I've been thinking about cheap ways to kill carriers.

"I'm sure your going to get a knock at your door ..lay face down arms spread and no sudden movements .."

Sir, can you put your hands in the yellow circles, please?

10
0

China can't find anyone smart enough to run its whizzbang $180m 1,640ft radio telescope

hplasm
Silver badge
Unhappy

I would do it...

But I'm totally unqualified in every way.

Sounds like 'a great opportunity for the right candidate' though.

Good lUck, Chinese astroboffins!

11
0

CMD.EXE gets first makeover in 20 years in new Windows 10 build

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

What is Windows? Sounds innovative

A product that is a Transparent Ripoff...

1
1

Teen who texted boyfriend to kill himself gets 15 months jail

hplasm
Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: Surprising..

"...he could of done a 100 different things"

No. Words have consequences. And grammar.

"And you wonder why the term cuck is becoming so popular."

Only between idiots.

18
0

Uber drivers game Uber's system like Uber games the entire planet

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Whatever way you look at it...

it's a mugs game, life.

/Marvin.

6
0

Microsoft: We beat Google, AWS to cloudy GPU VMs in Blighty

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Excellent news!

Now customers can get their work finished whilst the MS cloud is still up.

3
5

'Real' people want govts to spy on them, argues UK Home Secretary

hplasm
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: well played poms

The Encryption Ashes, eh? I think we have a new ElReg passtime to keep an eye on!

7
0

Skype for Business is not Skype – realising that is half the battle

hplasm
Silver badge
Devil

Re: "it was possible to organise building an atom bomb"

"It was achieved putting all the needed people in the same place... and ensuring nobody could go."

Like some sort of...walled garden!

2
0

Microsoft Surface laptop: Is this your MacBook Air replacement?

hplasm
Silver badge
Holmes

Betteridge's law of headlines...

Answers this question nicely.

10
0

Look out Silicon Valley, here comes Brit bruiser Amber Rudd to lay down the (cyber) law

hplasm
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Never mind the dawgs!

"Increasing taxes hasn't worked yet ... what make you think it'll ever work?"

It's not supposed to work - you just keep putting the taxes up. Result!

0
1

Sun of a b... Rising solar temp wrecks chances of finding ET in our system

hplasm
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: NO gas molecule can capture, store, redirect or amplify radiant energy photons....

"Magic Gas".... at FauxScienceSlayer.com"

'Nuff said!

4
0

Microsoft: Get in, IT nerds, you're now using Insider builds and twice-annual Windows rollouts

hplasm
Silver badge
Thumb Down

Re: Did we mention...

You are any things, but no Linux user.

1
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Devil

Re: Windows 10 is the new

"No SHE plays with Linux,"

Oops, sorry for the missing 's', using a Microsoft keyboard...

3
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: What's the problem?

"It's not difficult to do any testing well before the s/w hits desktops."

Still with the bugs the testing flags up...

1
1
hplasm
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: Did we mention...

"my RPi running Linux, and my Linux mint box wont do anything until they have updated either.... "

Lies. Stick to Windows... you can't work a Pi...

3
2
hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Windows 10 is the new

"Play nice, my 4 year old does."

Because he has Windows to play on?

3
1
hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Windows 10 is the new

users: Oi! Stop pushing Win10 down our throats!!

MS: Er, OK then. bend over...

11
0

Latest Windows 10 preview lets users link an Android to their PC

hplasm
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: But uhm...

"What about Windows Phone?"

What about what, now?

9
1

Hackers can turn web-connected car washes into horrible death traps

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Spaceballs quote

Oh dear! Now my senses are working overtime...

7
0

Big Cable falls into wormhole to alternate universe, sends back blog post about USA's amazing broadband

hplasm
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: Gaming - Dungeon Master

Oh look! Broccolli- how quaint!

*squeak*

"Your party died."

OH...it's dangerous broccolli!

Brilliant! (ST here :> )

3
0

Briton admits to router hack that DDoSed Deutsche Telekom

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Danny Kaye?

No, no..the chalice with the palace has the pellet with the poison, the flagon with the dragon is the brew that is true.

3
0

Microsoft hits new low: Threatens to axe classic Paint from Windows 10

hplasm
Silver badge
Holmes

Aha...

"You need a tool like ms paint so that you can take s screen shot when there's an error, and redact areas of the screen, before submitting bug reports."

Exactly....

14
0

Virgin Media broadband latency headaches still not fixed six months on

hplasm
Silver badge
Boffin

Virgin is a stupid name anyway...

... it reminds me of an elite grinning bearded goblin.

Ooo, you sound like a psychiatrist's dream...

3
0

They say we're too mean to Microsoft. Well, how about this... Redmond just had a stonking year. And only 8% tax. Whee!

hplasm
Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: A Stonking Year???

Stonking? It's like 'Bazzing'...

0
0
hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Tax rebates?

It's the American way. Think of it as an encouragement for profitable companies to invest in new yachts.

FTFY

1
4

So, FCC, how about that massive DDoS? Hello? Hello...? You still there?

hplasm
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Can we slap him?

Freeze Peach- not just for the GOPs, eh?

1
1

US Homeland Sec boss has snazzy new laptop bomb scanning tech – but admits he doesn't know what it's called

hplasm
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Flashbacks

More like growing up on Metaluma, with murderous giant-brain-headed security mutants- except without the giant brains...

4
0

'Coke dealer' called us after his stash was stolen – cops

hplasm
Silver badge
Coat

Jeez...

What was this guy on?

Oh, I see...

0
0

Why can't you install Windows 10 Creators Update on your old Atom netbook? Because Intel stopped loving you

hplasm
Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Good luck getting reliable support runing Linux on those obsolete silicons

Can't figure it out, eh?

12
1

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017