* Posts by Rich 11

2293 posts • joined 8 Jul 2009

Motorola Z2 Force: This one's for the butterfingered Android lovers

Rich 11
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This one's for the butterfingered Android lovers

Sounds like the 'special' offered at several Japanese brothels. Or so I'm told.

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OK, this time it's for real: The last available IPv4 address block has gone

Rich 11
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Re: what is wrong

But how to act on that belief... so far my favourite thing to do is called "hesitate"

Mine is called "procrastinate", simply because it takes longer to type.

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We 'could' send troubled Watchkeeper drones to war, insists UK minister

Rich 11
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Re: The Missing 5

Another triumph for the navigation system.

It wasn't the nav system's fault, not at all. The poor machines fell victim to the Barmouth Triangle, and are lost now to time and space.

I suppose there's a chance they'll be returned when the UFOs make contact, landing as scheduled at Aberystwyth Golf Club.

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Facebook admits it does track non-users, for their own good

Rich 11
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Re: Sly Zuckerfucker- What's been done about this???

Let's see Donald put that one to the test.

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Rich 11
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Re: Facebridge Analytica

Orwell coined the term prolefeed to describe superficial distractions distributed by the ruling elite to keep the people under control, but I don't think he would ever have imagined that a significant proportion of humanity would freely generate and willingly consume their own prolefeed knowing that it was being used to categorise and unduly influence them.

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Rich 11
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Re: Why?

Talking of which, what has Donald been saying about Comey today?

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Don’t fight automation software for control, just turn it off. FAST

Rich 11
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Re: Even in the extremely unlikely event that fully autonomous vehicles ever become viable

I'll still be walking. And watching my back.

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US, UK cyber cops warn Russians are rooting around in your routers

Rich 11
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Re: What we need to do to counter this threat is .......

Now where is my one time pad?

You left it in the pub. Again.

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NHS Digital execs showed 'little regard' for patient ethics by signing data deal

Rich 11
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Re: Socialized Medicine

It's not anything particular to healthcare. The root problem is the willingness of a subset of politicians (usually those sufficiently ruthless and mendacious enough to have climbed the greasy pole) to abandon principle in favour of what they prefer to think of as pragmatism. You can find examples throughout history: the one which initially comes to mind for me is the way servicemen were deliberately exposed to above-ground nuclear tests in Australia in the 1950s.

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Sysadmin’s worst client was … his mother! Until his sister called for help

Rich 11
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Re: "On a more serious note, on a dos fs once you exceed 512 files in the root directory,

But surely that has been fixed in Windows 7/8/10 already?

Let me just test that.

(If you don't see a second comment from me here, you'll know it's not been fixed.)

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B-Ark passengers to control most IT spend from 2019 onwards

Rich 11
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Re: @.stu

fewer of them will be shared

Well, yes, in the purely physical sense...

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British government to ink deal for yet another immigration database

Rich 11
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Re: How does one get a slice of this pie?

Is there a secret club that one must be a member of, which allows access to this trough of cash that all these incompetent outsourced companies have their noses in?

Yes, a very secret -- absolutely Top Secret -- club: donors to a political party. Bunging money at the Tories usually pays off very well, but on occasion members have been known to hedge their bets by supporting their local Blairite. Promises of lucrative directorships being awarded to senior party members are also known to help.

Many members of this secret club bemoan the fact that donorship in the UK doesn't pay off half as well as donorship in the US. Some are working to change that.

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Mark Duckerberg: Second Congressional grilling sees boss dodge questions like a pro

Rich 11
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Re: Round 1

and they are starting to fire up their old MySpace profiles

That will cheer up Rupert Murdoch no end.

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UK defines Cyber DEFCON 1, 2 and 3, though of course doesn't call it that

Rich 11
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Re: shortform/acronyms

CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN

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Rich 11
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Re: Strategic leadership from ministers/cabinet office.

Lets face it, it's not like they are known for their technological skills.

Not difficult. They already know they just have to go and talk to the people who know all the right hashtags.

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'Dear Mr F*ckingjoking': UK PM Theresa May's mass marketing missive misses mark

Rich 11
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Re: Syria

Breaking News

Asda has withdrawn all Damascus Beef products from their shelves as a precaution.

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How life started on Earth: Sulfur dioxide builds up, volcanoes blow, job done – boffins

Rich 11
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Re: EU's metrification?

Two parrots sat on a perch.

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar.

"Ouch!," they say.

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Rich 11
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Re: Earth has 800,000 cubic miles of Uranium with 4.4 billion year half life....

None of it, as usual.

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Rich 11
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Re: Ashes to ashes

Not to be confused with Scientology which has its own doctrine concerning the creative process

The doctrine known as 'lying'.

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My Tibetan digital detox lasted one morning, how about yours?

Rich 11
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Zen out

OK, so I'm not in Tibet but I did spend the last 30 minutes in the next best thing: my spare room at home where it can get a bit chilly and the Wi-Fi struggles to connect.

I bet your wi-fi password is 'Shambhala'.

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Not one, but 20,000 black holes hiding in Milky Way's heart

Rich 11
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Re: On the flip side

If we ever encountered a solar mass or smaller black hole, we wouldn't know much about it

If a solar mass black hole drifted into our solar system we would know about it very quickly, because the planets would take up new orbits dependent upon its location and line of motion. All the probes out there would stop pointing their antennae at Earth since they would no longer be able to calculate correctly where Earth was.

The less massive the black hole the less likely it is that we'd find out about it before it came close enough to harm us. There could be a black hole of a hundred tonnes mass in the Earth's core right now, for all we know, but even then we'd probably be able to detect it if its orbit around the Earth's centre of mass was as much as a hundred kilometres or so.

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Commonwealth Games brochure declares that England is now in Africa

Rich 11
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A little breathing space

There are plenty of good arguments for moving Parliament out of London for a few years, but Banjul is perhaps a little further away than most of us were expecting. Still, I'm willing to let them give it a try...

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What's silent but violent and costs $250m? Yes, it's Lockheed Martin's super-quiet, supersonic X-plane for NASA

Rich 11
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Disturbed people

NASA test pilots will fly it at altitude across sections of the US and see what kind of disturbance it causes people on the ground.

I think it's pretty clear what will disturb people on the ground.

"Arrggh, chemtrails!"

"Run, it's the UFOs!"

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Wanna work for El Reg? Developers needed for headline-writing AI bots

Rich 11
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Well, Budweiser is brewed from rice. Then again, Budweiser isn't beer.

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Rich 11
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Re: Editorial staff are vehemently opposed to this project

Editorial staff are vehemently opposed to this project, so the successful applicant will require superior interpersonal and conflict resolution skills.

In other words, you have to know which end of a cattle prod is which.

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Rich 11
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Re: Fake news!

How could we tell?

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Any social media accounts to declare? US wants travelers to tell

Rich 11
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Re: Sauce for the goose?.

Why would we want to inflict that on our tourist industries? Better to stick to the moral high ground, sit back, point and laugh.

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Rich 11
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Only if they weren't funded in the 1980s from New York, Chicago, Boston and Philadelphia.

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Rich 11
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Re: I've Heard of Bucket Lists But The US must Want to be The Slop Bowl of Undesirable Locations

France?! You quisling! Officer, arrest this man.

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Donald Trump jumps on anti-tech bandwagon, gets everything wrong

Rich 11
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Re: Irony

Irony is Trump making claims that others are not paying their fair share of income tax while he uses the excuse that his own taxes are still being audited by the IRS* as the lame reason for not releasing his income taxes.

It isn't irony, it's hypocrisy. Trump isn't sufficiently self-aware to know this, or he just doesn't care because he knows his target audience will cheer him to the rafters even when he states six contradictory things before breakfast.

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Privacy activists to UK plod: Wanna slurp folks' phone records? Come back with a warrant

Rich 11
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Re: If history is any guide..

Or it needs someone asked to unlock their phone to say, "Have you got a search warrant? No? Then I decline" and for it to go through the courts to make case law.

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Parents blame brats' slipping school grades on crap internet speeds

Rich 11
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Clearly the minister has not thought through the potential educational impact of such a move.

Thus continuing in the fine tradition of government education policy since 1988. At least 1988.

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UK.gov unveils cyber security export strategy – only thing missing is the strategy

Rich 11
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Re: More "world class" IT

You don't get to compete unless you are top-class..

Or at the very least have access to the right drugs.

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Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, off you go: Snout of UK space forcibly removed from EU satellite trough

Rich 11
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Re: WE HAVE CONTROL OF OUR BORDERS!

One of them looks to be drifting off into the Irish Sea.

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Corking story: Idiotic smart wine bottle idea falls over, passes out

Rich 11
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Re: Huh?

Yeah. This was the giveaway:

subscribe to receive a batch of four cartridges a month

That's the first weekend of each month dealt with. What about the rest of the month?

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Zucker for history: What I learnt about Facebook 600 years ago

Rich 11
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Re: It was better before!

I'm amazed of the deep knowledge of French culture Mr. Dabbs has.

He always knew that hanging on to those French letters would serve him well.

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Cambridge Analytica seeks data protection assistant

Rich 11
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@ledswinger

gobbled in the office

These days you can get arrested for doing that at work.

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El Reg deep dive: Everything you need to know about UK.gov's pr0n block

Rich 11
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Re: given unrealistic expectations of the act

Unfortunately I can confirm that category d) doesn't work just by itself.

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Rich 11
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Re: Cybergumble

About two dozen years ago I installed a TCP/IP stack and Netscape on a work colleague's computer, then proceeded to show him the basics of how t'WWW worked. When it came to demonstrating search engines I thought I'd use his academic specialism as an example and typed in 'video live art'. Big mistake.

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Rich 11
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Re: We'll add that to the list shall we?

"Read my lips: you can trust us."

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F-35B Block 4 software upgrades will cost Britain £345m

Rich 11
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Joke

Re: Charging us for Beta grade software then

Maybe they'll be able to reduce the costs by selling the data the software gathers on the open market.

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Oh bucket! Unpack the suitcases. TRAPPIST-1 planets too wet to support life

Rich 11
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The vast majority of it viral particles.

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Rich 11
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Re: Perfect objective for a UK colonisation effort ...

If there's any chance of helping UK fishermen at all, I think it only right that Michael Gove be packed off right now in a rocket to investigate.

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BOOM! Cambridge Analytica explodes following extraordinary TV expose

Rich 11
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Re: Obombie sought and got GCHQ wiretaps of Trump to benefit Reptillary !

But I'm starting to wonder if perhaps we shouldn't put out an APB for his second neuron. The one he appears to be left with seems to be lonely.

Leaky skull syndrome. Also known as 'firing on all colanders'.

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Another day, another self-flying car pipe dream surfaces

Rich 11
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Re: That's all we need

And driven by a bloke named Gene.

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Windows 10 to force you to use Edge, even if it isn't default browser

Rich 11
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Re: @Tim Brown 1 - Microsoft points gun at own foot and pulls the trigger.

They've just moving on from the phalanges to the metatarsals.

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Brexit in spaaaace! At T-1 year and counting: UK politicos ponder impact

Rich 11
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One more step into the dark

Academics and industry said the impact could be mitigated, if the government finds a way to replace lost funding, and also provide clarity on how the movement of people and customs regulations will change in a post-Brexit world.

That's an effing big if. Anyone willing to put a quid on it all happening?

Thought not.

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I couldn't give a Greek clock about your IoT fertility tracker

Rich 11
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Re: Glamping?

Our best effort was 'pabell posh' (Lit. posh tent). Anyone know what it is in German?

A better designed and engineered tent, I expect.

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Rich 11
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Re: In my day

I hope I'm not the only one who interpreted 'attending to the wants of nature' as tossing off a shrew.

No? Just me then. Look, if a few more of you realised that rodents don't have thumbs, maybe you'd be more sympathetic to their plight.

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Boffins find sign of water existing deep into Earth's mantle by looking at diamonds

Rich 11
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190 miles down

Give it a couple of hours and the Creationists will be all over this, proclaiming it as evidence for God's fountains of the deep causing the flooding of the Earth in 40 days and 40 nights. Hallelujah!

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