* Posts by Craig 2

354 posts • joined 1 Jul 2009

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Peak tech! Bacon vending machine signals apex of human invention

Craig 2

Peak Tech?

More like Pork Tech...

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Do not adjust your set: Hats off to Apple, you struggle to shift iPhones 'cos you're oddly ethical

Craig 2

Re: Losing customer

Sounds like you're well on the path I'm just starting down. No more iPhones, mid-range Android from now on.

Incidentally, I wonder what this will do to the argument of 2nd hand Apple phones holding their price so well...

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OneDrive is broken: Microsoft's cloudy storage drops from the sky for EU users

Craig 2

I wonder what the aggregate uptime for all Microsoft services combined is... It just seems pretty much every week there's some part not working.

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Blighty: We spent £1bn on Galileo and all we got was this lousy T-shirt

Craig 2

Re: Well, who'd have thought it?

"I'm not sure anyone actually understood what "Vote To Leave The EU" actually meant."

Easy: Tabloids told them migrants were the source of all our problems which would magically disappear if we left the EU.

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iPhone XS: Just another £300 for a better cam- Wait, come back!

Craig 2
Joke

Re: 2018 is the year of stupidly sized phones

"whereas nothing fits in women's pockets so that's not an issue."

Why would they need to when everything is within easy reach in the cupboards & drawers?

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Huawei Mate 20 Pro: If you can stomach the nagware and price, it may be Droid of the Year

Craig 2

Re: £899 - Ouch

Yea I'm never paying close to £1k for a phone! The BOM for the iPhone XS was quoted as something like 1/3 sale price so plenty of wiggle room while still making obscene profits. Hopefully this slowing in phone sales / upgrades recently is the tip of the iceberg and people will wake up to the fact that they are being fleeced.

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UK rail lines blocked by unexpected Windows dialog box

Craig 2
Joke

Re: Um

I managed to uninstall Office 2010 silently. It's not that hard...

I thought Windows Update was how you silently uninstalled things?

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US draft bill moots locking up execs who lie about privacy violations

Craig 2

How about a law locking up politicians who lie? Yea, thought they wouldn't be so eager on that score...

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Smartphone industry is in 'recession'! Could it be possible we have *gasp* reached 'peak tech'?

Craig 2

Re: No value

They don't need to research to improve battery life, just make the average phone 1mm thicker and it will have great battery life. Ahh well, wishful thinking...

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Seagate HAMRs out a roadmap for future hard drive recording tech

Craig 2

Re: Should be interesting

If the worst kind of failure simply turned it into a read-only drive I would be happy with that!

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Craig 2

I can't read stories on hard drive density without immediately worrying about my stored data and it's seemingly precarious existence...

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Unsure why you can't log into Office 365? So is Microsoft

Craig 2

Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

No, it means Microsoft picked the most ironic name in software history :)

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Hi there, Hubble, glad to hear you're doing okay

Craig 2
Trollface

So what you're saying is it's amazing how people like stuff they can actually see?

We're not all Neo, we can't read the source code to the universe ;)

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Budget 2018: UK goes it alone on digital sales tax for tech giants

Craig 2

"..and the corporations will pass the cost of that tax straight on to us as higher prices. Thanks Phil."

Ignoring the fact (already pointed out) that we don't pay for services from most of the targeted corporations, it will also hopefully start towards leveling the playing field with online mega-retailers and small businesses.

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Roughly 30 years after its birth at UK's Acorn Computers, RISC OS 5 is going open source

Craig 2

Fond, fond memories of BBC Basic, it was a joy to work in and ahead of it's time for creating structured code. The Archimedes came along towards the end of my school time and I mainly remember being wowed by the "Lander" demo.

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NASA's Chandra probe suddenly becomes an EX-ray space telescope (for now, anyway)

Craig 2

re: it will actually take 10 mins and a 3hr 50 min tea break......

Estimated repair time is always infinite, until you hit the solution :)

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Yale Weds: Just some system maintenance, nothing to worry about. Yale Thurs: Nobody's smart alarm app works

Craig 2

"I’m an engineer, I work in IT..."

Who signed off on him not carrying alternative options? What was his rollback plan? Calls himself an IT engineer....

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Russian rocket goes BOOM again – this time with a crew on it

Craig 2

Conspiracy theories incoming...

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On the third day of Windows Microsoft gave to me: A file-munching run of DELTREE

Craig 2

Re: Thrilling

"My home backup solution is in some ways more elaborate than my enterprise toys :p"

Indeed, it would take an ELE impact to destroy all backups of my photos!

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Swedish ISP spanked for sexist 'distracted boyfriend' advert for developer jobs

Craig 2

re: no offence, but....

My daughter thinks you can say anything as long as you start with "no offence, but". It has given us some eye-watering truths!

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Curiosity's computer silent on science, baffling boffins

Craig 2
Joke

So turning it off and on doesn't always work then....

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Florence and the Machines: Data centers brace as hurricane smashes into US coast

Craig 2

Sounds like a lot of effort just to keep us entertained with cat videos...

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Russia: The hole in the ISS Soyuz lifeboat – was it the crew wot dunnit?

Craig 2

RE: Just where do you get these stock photos from?

Never mind where they come from, what the hell do you type as search keywords to get that headline image!

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Probably for the best: Apple makes sure eSIMs won't nuke the operators

Craig 2

Re: I can see some of the US networks

Yes, Apple may have won a power struggle with networks; now they can leverage that to get favourable terms (for themselves, not customers) when deciding which network(s) to support with new phones. The name has changed but the game is still to make as much money as possible by any means necessary...

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Guess who just bought Maplin? Dragons' Den celebrity biz guy Peter Jones

Craig 2

Re: "extensive" customer data

Exactly what I was going to ask... Selling a company and including "extensive customer data" as an asset sounds like inviting the sale of said data by itself. Definitely NOT under the heading of "using customer data to process orders etc".

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HTC U12 Life: Notchless, reasonably priced and proper buttons? Oh joy

Craig 2

Re: Honestly.. this is the problem with the Android phone market

"The USP of this handset is practically non-existent.. "

As mentioned, the market is mature. Do you buy a toaster that has some great USPs or do you just want good toast? I want any device to perform the functions I bought it for, not to play with the latest gimmick.

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DeepMind AI bots tell Google to literally chill out: Software takes control of server cooling

Craig 2
Terminator

"AI decided to get rid of the meatbags?"

Well, most people are a source of unnecessary hot air so it's only logical...

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Bitcoin backer sues AT&T for $240m over stolen cryptocurrency

Craig 2

You would think AT&T could look at the existing sim activity and see that it's still valid & working. A least send a text saying "do you really want to port? 24 hours to respond..."

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Talk about left Field: Apple lures back Tesla engineering guru

Craig 2

"will they slow their cars down as the batteries wear out?"

I guess this is just a snarky joke, but technically it could reduce top acceleration from standstill. :)

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Devon County Council techies: WE KNOW IT WASN'T YOU!

Craig 2

"The fact they screwed up and then tried to blame someone else is just pathetic personal ethics."

Indeed, this kind of "casual lying" is pervasive in society today. It should not be accepted, especially from official bodies such as representatives of the people since it hints at a greater general dishonesty.

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The age of hard drives is over as Samsung cranks out consumer QLC SSDs

Craig 2

" The future is not bright for desktop and notebook disk drives."

That has been true since SSD became "consumerised" but still, here we are buying hundreds of millions of traditional HDs each year. In the field of computing that's not bad for a 60's technology!

SSD will exceed HD shipment volumes soon but a lot longer to match price / storage. The new paradigm will be (if not already) SSD for boot / apps / working data and HD for storage / archive.

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BT boosted by punters and sport – as it preps to squeeze subs harder

Craig 2

Openreach should bill customers for the physical line. BT provide a phone service and useless sports coverage. Nothing might change financially but at least it would make sense of the service most people actually want these days. (A line for their broadband, nothing else)

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Google's Alphabet hit by Europe's other GDPR: Global Domination = Profit Reduction

Craig 2

"And el Reg keeps calling Apple's pricing a tax on stupid!"

Advertising is a tax on Greed, not stupidity!

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Bonkers Azure bookings give Microsoft a record-breaking $110bn year

Craig 2

Re: Intelligent cloud

I blame Microsoft's cloudy expansion for the lack of clouds over the UK for the last few weeks...

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Craig 2

Re: Loads of Money

"So someone must be buying[1] their shit. Can't for the life of me understand why"

All the (now) middle management grew up on Microsoft and stick with what they know?

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♫ The Core i9 clock cycles go up. Who cares where they come down?

Craig 2

These need a disclaimer that sustained maximum performance is not possible. The idea is sound that the processor can smash through a web page render or other short workload and then throttle back. BUT it's just not suitable for multi-hour rendering or gaming sessions.

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Alien sun has smashing time sucking up planets

Craig 2

Curious as to what happens to planetary material sucked into stars. Does it become effectively more fuel for the star or can elements remain?

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Trump wants to work with Russia on infosec. Security experts: lol no

Craig 2

Some stories you just have to double check you're reading The Register and not The Onion!

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It's 2018 so, of course, climate.news is sold to climate change deniers

Craig 2
Trollface

Re: Bollocks

"....all seem to have the same aversion to facts"

"As do people who make sweeping generalisations."

Err.. that's a pretty sweeping generalisation...

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Google leaps on the platform formerly known as Firefox with $22m splurge for KaiOS

Craig 2

How spoiled and lazy we've become

"just 256MB of RAM" :)

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Not OK Google: Massive outage turns smart home kit utterly dumb

Craig 2

Users in Google's home state of California started complaining that their lack of foresight came to bite them on their ass...

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The eyes have it: 'DeepFakes' bogus AI-meddled videos outed by unblinking gaze

Craig 2

Re: The real problem with "Deep Fakes"

"I can now visit Miss Whiplash safe in the knowledge that should a video ever emerge I can gaze into the camera with a look of injured innocence and say "Obviously this is a Deep Fake."

That would be a dangerous path to tread as recently proved; it's not against the rules to see Miss Whiplash but it IS against the rules to lie about it....

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Keep your hands on the f*cking wheel! New Tesla update like being taught to drive by your dad

Craig 2

Re: Crash Test Dummies.

" it ensures you keep within the lanes,"

If you can't stay inside the lane then you're either A: Not concentrating or B: A terrible driver. In either case, autopilot just encourages that type of behaviour.

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Craig 2

Re: Crash Test Dummies.

"Inevitably when you have autopilot engaged you will start to lose concentration and start to learn to let the car do the driving"

This is the real crux of the matter. What is the point of "autopilot" if you can't reduce concentration by some degree? If Tesla say you require 100% attention even when on autopilot then it's effectively pointless.

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Which? calls for compensation for users hit by Windows 10 woes

Craig 2
Trollface

"In the survey, conducted in March and so before the excitement of the April 2018 Update"

You need to proof-read your articles better, that's not how you spell "excrement"...

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Security execs must prep for post-Brexit cyber challenges – report

Craig 2

"If there's no law saying that I don't have to say hello to my neighbour, it doesn't stop me from saying hello?"

A better metaphor would be the new neighbour joining your local neighbourhood watch group, then saying it's a load of crap and leaving. The rest of the group might not feel inclined to share information with him after being given the finger....

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Monday: Intel touts 28-core desktop CPU. Tuesday: AMD turns Threadripper up to 32

Craig 2

"Whether Intel was trying to spoil AMD's announcement, or vice versa, it doesn't really matter: what matters is that someone is putting pressure on monopoly giant Intel, forcing it to innovate in the desktop world rather than burn millions of dollars on trendy side projects it later abandons or neglects."

This here is why I love AMD, who cares what they produce* as long as they keep Intel (relatively) honest.

*I love AMD as much as the next person, no fanboi downvotes please ;)

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Hear that? Of course it's Indiegogo's deadline for a Vega+ whooshing by

Craig 2

Re: It's almost as though crowdfunding is a terrible idea

Isn't that what venture capitalists do on a much grander scale though? (Think Elon Musk / Tesla type funding)

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SpaceX flings SES-12 satellite into orbit, but would-be lunar tourists should probably unpack

Craig 2

Re: "wrestling with an uncooperative antenna"

"The Russians are still using AE-35s?"

That particular piece of hardware had a 100% service record...

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Help, I'm being held prisoner in a security camera testing factory. So please read this...

Craig 2

Re: Missing vital information

"Does the camera have an accessible standards based video stream"

Indeed, anything that says you need to use their app is a big no-no. Built in obsolescence which may be realized in as little as a year and almost certainly within the lifetime of the hardware...

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