* Posts by Craig 2

334 posts • joined 1 Jul 2009

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Curiosity's computer silent on science, baffling boffins

Craig 2
Joke

So turning it off and on doesn't always work then....

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Florence and the Machines: Data centers brace as hurricane smashes into US coast

Craig 2

Sounds like a lot of effort just to keep us entertained with cat videos...

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Russia: The hole in the ISS Soyuz lifeboat – was it the crew wot dunnit?

Craig 2

RE: Just where do you get these stock photos from?

Never mind where they come from, what the hell do you type as search keywords to get that headline image!

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Probably for the best: Apple makes sure eSIMs won't nuke the operators

Craig 2

Re: I can see some of the US networks

Yes, Apple may have won a power struggle with networks; now they can leverage that to get favourable terms (for themselves, not customers) when deciding which network(s) to support with new phones. The name has changed but the game is still to make as much money as possible by any means necessary...

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Guess who just bought Maplin? Dragons' Den celebrity biz guy Peter Jones

Craig 2

Re: "extensive" customer data

Exactly what I was going to ask... Selling a company and including "extensive customer data" as an asset sounds like inviting the sale of said data by itself. Definitely NOT under the heading of "using customer data to process orders etc".

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HTC U12 Life: Notchless, reasonably priced and proper buttons? Oh joy

Craig 2

Re: Honestly.. this is the problem with the Android phone market

"The USP of this handset is practically non-existent.. "

As mentioned, the market is mature. Do you buy a toaster that has some great USPs or do you just want good toast? I want any device to perform the functions I bought it for, not to play with the latest gimmick.

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DeepMind AI bots tell Google to literally chill out: Software takes control of server cooling

Craig 2
Terminator

"AI decided to get rid of the meatbags?"

Well, most people are a source of unnecessary hot air so it's only logical...

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Bitcoin backer sues AT&T for $240m over stolen cryptocurrency

Craig 2

You would think AT&T could look at the existing sim activity and see that it's still valid & working. A least send a text saying "do you really want to port? 24 hours to respond..."

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Talk about left Field: Apple lures back Tesla engineering guru

Craig 2

"will they slow their cars down as the batteries wear out?"

I guess this is just a snarky joke, but technically it could reduce top acceleration from standstill. :)

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Devon County Council techies: WE KNOW IT WASN'T YOU!

Craig 2

"The fact they screwed up and then tried to blame someone else is just pathetic personal ethics."

Indeed, this kind of "casual lying" is pervasive in society today. It should not be accepted, especially from official bodies such as representatives of the people since it hints at a greater general dishonesty.

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The age of hard drives is over as Samsung cranks out consumer QLC SSDs

Craig 2

" The future is not bright for desktop and notebook disk drives."

That has been true since SSD became "consumerised" but still, here we are buying hundreds of millions of traditional HDs each year. In the field of computing that's not bad for a 60's technology!

SSD will exceed HD shipment volumes soon but a lot longer to match price / storage. The new paradigm will be (if not already) SSD for boot / apps / working data and HD for storage / archive.

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BT boosted by punters and sport – as it preps to squeeze subs harder

Craig 2

Openreach should bill customers for the physical line. BT provide a phone service and useless sports coverage. Nothing might change financially but at least it would make sense of the service most people actually want these days. (A line for their broadband, nothing else)

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Google's Alphabet hit by Europe's other GDPR: Global Domination = Profit Reduction

Craig 2

"And el Reg keeps calling Apple's pricing a tax on stupid!"

Advertising is a tax on Greed, not stupidity!

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Bonkers Azure bookings give Microsoft a record-breaking $110bn year

Craig 2

Re: Intelligent cloud

I blame Microsoft's cloudy expansion for the lack of clouds over the UK for the last few weeks...

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Craig 2

Re: Loads of Money

"So someone must be buying[1] their shit. Can't for the life of me understand why"

All the (now) middle management grew up on Microsoft and stick with what they know?

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♫ The Core i9 clock cycles go up. Who cares where they come down?

Craig 2

These need a disclaimer that sustained maximum performance is not possible. The idea is sound that the processor can smash through a web page render or other short workload and then throttle back. BUT it's just not suitable for multi-hour rendering or gaming sessions.

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Alien sun has smashing time sucking up planets

Craig 2

Curious as to what happens to planetary material sucked into stars. Does it become effectively more fuel for the star or can elements remain?

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Trump wants to work with Russia on infosec. Security experts: lol no

Craig 2

Some stories you just have to double check you're reading The Register and not The Onion!

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It's 2018 so, of course, climate.news is sold to climate change deniers

Craig 2
Trollface

Re: Bollocks

"....all seem to have the same aversion to facts"

"As do people who make sweeping generalisations."

Err.. that's a pretty sweeping generalisation...

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Google leaps on the platform formerly known as Firefox with $22m splurge for KaiOS

Craig 2

How spoiled and lazy we've become

"just 256MB of RAM" :)

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Not OK Google: Massive outage turns smart home kit utterly dumb

Craig 2

Users in Google's home state of California started complaining that their lack of foresight came to bite them on their ass...

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The eyes have it: 'DeepFakes' bogus AI-meddled videos outed by unblinking gaze

Craig 2

Re: The real problem with "Deep Fakes"

"I can now visit Miss Whiplash safe in the knowledge that should a video ever emerge I can gaze into the camera with a look of injured innocence and say "Obviously this is a Deep Fake."

That would be a dangerous path to tread as recently proved; it's not against the rules to see Miss Whiplash but it IS against the rules to lie about it....

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Keep your hands on the f*cking wheel! New Tesla update like being taught to drive by your dad

Craig 2

Re: Crash Test Dummies.

" it ensures you keep within the lanes,"

If you can't stay inside the lane then you're either A: Not concentrating or B: A terrible driver. In either case, autopilot just encourages that type of behaviour.

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Craig 2

Re: Crash Test Dummies.

"Inevitably when you have autopilot engaged you will start to lose concentration and start to learn to let the car do the driving"

This is the real crux of the matter. What is the point of "autopilot" if you can't reduce concentration by some degree? If Tesla say you require 100% attention even when on autopilot then it's effectively pointless.

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Which? calls for compensation for users hit by Windows 10 woes

Craig 2
Trollface

"In the survey, conducted in March and so before the excitement of the April 2018 Update"

You need to proof-read your articles better, that's not how you spell "excrement"...

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Security execs must prep for post-Brexit cyber challenges – report

Craig 2

"If there's no law saying that I don't have to say hello to my neighbour, it doesn't stop me from saying hello?"

A better metaphor would be the new neighbour joining your local neighbourhood watch group, then saying it's a load of crap and leaving. The rest of the group might not feel inclined to share information with him after being given the finger....

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Monday: Intel touts 28-core desktop CPU. Tuesday: AMD turns Threadripper up to 32

Craig 2

"Whether Intel was trying to spoil AMD's announcement, or vice versa, it doesn't really matter: what matters is that someone is putting pressure on monopoly giant Intel, forcing it to innovate in the desktop world rather than burn millions of dollars on trendy side projects it later abandons or neglects."

This here is why I love AMD, who cares what they produce* as long as they keep Intel (relatively) honest.

*I love AMD as much as the next person, no fanboi downvotes please ;)

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Hear that? Of course it's Indiegogo's deadline for a Vega+ whooshing by

Craig 2

Re: It's almost as though crowdfunding is a terrible idea

Isn't that what venture capitalists do on a much grander scale though? (Think Elon Musk / Tesla type funding)

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SpaceX flings SES-12 satellite into orbit, but would-be lunar tourists should probably unpack

Craig 2

Re: "wrestling with an uncooperative antenna"

"The Russians are still using AE-35s?"

That particular piece of hardware had a 100% service record...

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Help, I'm being held prisoner in a security camera testing factory. So please read this...

Craig 2

Re: Missing vital information

"Does the camera have an accessible standards based video stream"

Indeed, anything that says you need to use their app is a big no-no. Built in obsolescence which may be realized in as little as a year and almost certainly within the lifetime of the hardware...

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Facebook caught up in court battle with Amazon and pals over 'ageist job ads' that targeted young

Craig 2

Re: Slam dunk

"Faecebook itself is becoming increasingly an old farts platform anyway as the one see it as very uncool and smart people see it as a place for fuckwits."

Which demographic are people that think puerile word puns are clever?

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Craig 2

Re: Slam dunk

"Advertising in a teen mag is still visible to other people if they choose to look."

Yea, but the 40+ bloke probably won't make it to the interview when he says "I saw your ad in Sweet 16 magazine".

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The great wearables myth busted: Apps never, ever mattered

Craig 2

Re: This was always the case.....

Sorry but I used to mock my mate continuously about his MS Band. Always rebooting it, tiny battery life using GPS, back to be repaired multiple times.... Maybe he was just unlucky but I wouldn't have touched one. It did have a nice screen though :)

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Craig 2

Garmins are built for a purpose (fitness tracking) and generally perform it extremely well. That's what I want from a device - best suitability & performance for my particular need. I wonder what the user 'need' for the number 1 smartwatch brand is?

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Microsoft patches problematic OS to deal with SSD woes

Craig 2

So now fixing a previous fuckup counts as good news for Windows 10!? Bit like the captain saying the plane is crashing but the good news is we'll be landing early...

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DRAMA ON MARS: Curiosity bot fires laser at alien metal object

Craig 2

Re: 'Egg Rock isn't unique'

"truly unique, totally unique or exceptionally unique."

I too have a pet hate of the common misuse of "unique". It's either unique or it isn't. You can't have "very unique" or "super unique" etc etc

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Open justice FTW! El Reg fought the law – and El Reg won

Craig 2
Trollface

"Midlands-based reseller Aria Technology "

Really? They're based in Longsight, Manchester

That IS the midlands.....

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Three-hour outage renders Nest-equipped smart homes very dumb

Craig 2

Re: Did I read that right...

I wouldn't let my kettle rely on the internet, never mind door locks. 3 hours without a cup of tea and I might kill someone!

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Blighty: If EU won't let us play at Galileo, we're going home and taking encryption tech with us

Craig 2

Re: Fucking Brexit

Indeed, Europe already hates us (as proved by Eurovision every year) and the UK, or whatever remains of it in a decade, will be avoided like the plague. /sigh

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Scissors cut paper. Paper wraps rock. Lab-made enzyme eats plastic

Craig 2

Re: Ringworld Calling...

Yep, the scariest word in that article is "accidentally". What else are they accidentally creating and what are the odds it might not be controllable... Lots of sci-fi references on similar stories but I like Michael Critchon's "The Andromeda Strain" in which an alien bacterium is brought back to earth and mutates rapidly. At one stage it likes dissolving rubber...

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The law of run Nintendo consequences: Sega brings out mini Mega Drive / Genesis

Craig 2

Totally missed opportunity on the name.... "Mini Mega" sounds much cooler IMHO :)

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'Fat boy' flies: ISRO's heavy rocket fails to blow up

Craig 2

Re: And the UK gives "aid" to this country.

"Yes, some will say, there are parts of India that are poor; but there are parts of the UK that are poor too!"

Parts of India are poor because they don't have water, electricity or basic sanitation. Parts of the UK are poor because they spend their benefits on scratchcards and booze...

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Uber JUMPs, slurps San Francisco bike biz

Craig 2

Re: Anything goes if its green

"For a small fee she'll also recover others' nets."

The net gains of a scheme like that could be huge....

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Huawei P20 Pro: Triple-lens shooter promises the Earth ...

Craig 2

Re: Smartphones are SOOOO over

Please tell me that whenever you buy a new smartphone your purchasing decision is based on the thickness of the camera lens.

So given 2 phones, one with a grossly protruding lens and one flush it wouldn't be a purchase factor for you? Of course nobody cares about the lens itself, but they DO care about having the thinnest phone for whatever illogical reasons...

As close as possible is a funny expression. We - of planet Earth - are as close as possible to the Andromeda Galaxy. Not close enough, though.

A nonsensical comparison and factually incorrect... We will be closer to the Andromeda galaxy tomorrow and in a few billion years we will be a little too close for comfort assuming anyone is around to see that. However your smartphone will probably take great pictures by then ;)

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Craig 2

Re: Smartphones are SOOOO over

Hence the review focusing on one of the main areas ripe for continued improvement. Battling the laws of physics to make a lens <5mm thick perform as close as possible to as a dedicated camera. The closer they get, the more people will forgo the camera. *

* Before the indignant replies flood in, I said MORE... I didn't say YOU, Mr "I always carry my 15 lenses and assorted accessories" professional photographer. The best camera is the one you have with you, for most people that is a phone.

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Slap visibility beacons on bikes so they can chat to auto autos, says trade body

Craig 2

Re: Yeah... Right

Random anecdote on how bad cyclists are...

Random anecdote on how bad motorists are...

This is a random anecdote on predictable anecdotes given the subject.

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SpaceX blasted massive plasma hole in Earth's ionosphere

Craig 2

As the doctor said, getting it up is fairly easy, keeping it up takes much more effort ;)

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Recording Industry Ass. says vinyl and CD sales beat digital downloads

Craig 2

Re: Hours wasted

It took you 2 hours to go right-click copy - right click paste & walk away?

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Craig 2

Yea it's all great! CDs & records are still relevant if you take out the overwhelmingly dominant consumption method...

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Five things you need to know about Microsoft's looming Windows 10 Spring Creators Update

Craig 2
Trollface

According to the poll, around 33% intend to have Linux on their next PC, this really WILL be the year of the Linux desktop!!

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