Wonder if my GP uses EMIS
He's rarely available anyway - he's too busy moonlighting as consultant gynaecologist, golfer, and circumcisionist (available for weddings, parties, etc). Slots for appointments are only opened a couple of days in advance and then you play telephone lottery with the reception dragons to get a booking. If you succeed in this quest, you next have to arrange time off work to attend the appointment, which will be an hour late. Then he fobs you off with 5 boxes of whatever free samples the drug rep dropped off that week, so you end up singing soprano and growing breasts. Meanwhile, the ingrowing toenail is not getting any better.
It's easier to get an appointment with the queen to pick up an MBE, and at least Liz pretends to be interested in you (well, she'd probably notice if your hand came off when she shook it. I doubt my GP would).