* Posts by John G Imrie

1575 posts • joined 17 Jun 2009

No nudity please, we're killing ourselves: Advice to Facebook mods leaks

John G Imrie
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Trollface

It's not nudity thats the problem

It's female nudity. Now put that Burqa on Woman!

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Has AI gone too far? DeepTingle turns El Reg news into terrible erotica

John G Imrie
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Alien

So is ...

aManFromMars an early prototype?

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Biz overlords need to give a stuff about what they're told by IT crowd

John G Imrie
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An even more paranoid 63 per cent of IT staff said a breach could result in them losing their jobs, versus just five per cent of CMOs.

I think this says more about the difficulty of firing a Suit over a Tecky.

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Plutus Payroll clients and staff fell for plausible business model fairy tales

John G Imrie
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If it looks too good to be true,it's probably a con somehow..

Well it seamed to be working fine and all legal as well until the new owners came on board.

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Proposed PATCH Act forces US snoops to quit hoarding code exploits

John G Imrie
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Alien

Who are you?

And what have you done with the real amanfromMarse1?

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Chelsea Manning leaves prison, heads straight for booze and pizza

John G Imrie
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WTF?

You can tweet from a US Prison?

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Bloke charged under UK terror law for refusing to cough up passwords

John G Imrie
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Re: Device with multiple partitions

All of them, and each refusal is a separate offence.

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Do we need Windows patch legislation?

John G Imrie
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What I would point fingers at are vendors of kit with a long lifespan that just don't offer upgrades to software and drivers that work on modern systems.

THIS^^^^^^

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Microsoft to spooks: WannaCrypt was inevitable, quit hoarding

John G Imrie
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Re: Lack of fall back systems

always good to have a fall back system.

A fall back system is a waste of resources, The Management.

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European Patent Office dragged to human rights court – by its own staff

John G Imrie
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vote in a suitable replacement

could interfere with plans to vote in a suitable replacement for Battistelli when his term runs out in 2018:

By which time Battistelli wil have re written the rules so that only people whose surname starts with a B and have been approved by the current President can stand.

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$6,000 for tours of apocalyptic post-Brexit London? WTF, NYT?

John G Imrie
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Trollface

For a real post brexit apocalypses

Send them to Manchester.

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Fake invoice scammers slurp $5bn+ from corp beancounters – FBI

John G Imrie
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It was a Judge Dredd story

The main character was charging the companies for the time spent in drawing up the invoice. Being as the main character had obviously spent that time in drawing up the invoice Dredd was at a loss as to what, if any, law they had broken.

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Amazon tweaks so-called 'assisted suicide' publishing contracts to ink EU deal

John G Imrie
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Re: 10% of Amazon's total annual turnover

It's Amazon everywhere and its turnover not profit. Turnover is much harder to fudge as it's basically the value of the total amount of stuff you have sold. Profit, to quote an eminent accountant, is 'what you want it to be'.

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How would you pronounce 'Cyxtera'?

John G Imrie
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How would you pronounce 'Cyxtera'?

I pronounce it 'poncey name dreamt up by marketing as hats to extract the most money from the client'

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Male escort forgot pregnancy protection, scores data protection instead

John G Imrie
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Re: In the UK

The Child Support Service that replaces it is, in my experience, much fairer.

Good, I had several run ins with the old CSA and although I found the staff I dealt with professional and polite the actual organisation was a mess. Luckily they weren't chasing me for money.

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John G Imrie
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In the UK

all four of the men would be being chased by the child support agency.

I'm not sure where my loyalties lie here. If she asked for no condom then I blame the woman as she was paying for the service. If on the other hand if she said she wanted mine Herr to bag up, then he should be tracked down and forced to help support the child.

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BOFH: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back

John G Imrie
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Yes

Viva James

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Forensic accountants appointed to pore over Post Office IT scandal

John G Imrie
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Re: And then....

Can we have them in court for malicious prosecution as well

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Nuh-uh, Google, you WILL hand over emails stored on foreign servers, says US judge

John G Imrie
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Us Judge declairs entire Internet is subject to Islamic Law

If it can be seen in the US it's under US law.

So conversely if it can be seen in Saudi Arabia its under Saudi law.

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John G Imrie
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If the EU law applied to American data temporarily held in Europe

But EU Law holds for American goods and American citizens temporarily in Europe

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Trump's lips sealed on surveillance, complains EU privacy chief

John G Imrie
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Joke

He hasn't called

Well I'm not calling him, the bastard.

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BOFH: Defenestration, a solution to Solutions To Problems We Don't Have

John G Imrie
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Re: James

Either he is about to go native with the BOFH and the PFY or he is about to end up as a cushion between the Boss and some scaffolding carelessly left below the Boss's window. Place your bets as to which.

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Twitter sues US govt to protect 'Department of Immigration employee' who doesn't like Trump

John G Imrie
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He who controls the present controls the past, he who controls the past controls the future:- George Orwell, 1984

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Ex-IBMer sues Google for $10bn – after his web ad for 'divine honey cancer cure' was pulled

John G Imrie
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Can I sue this guy...

For making me have to like Google today?

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Aviation regulator flies in face of UK.gov ban, says electronics should be stowed in cabin. Duh

John G Imrie
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It's all verry simple

Devices go in the hold. Batteries have to be removed and kept with you in the cabin.

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It's not just Elon building bridges to the brain: The Internet of Things is coming to a head

John G Imrie
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Why am I thinking ...

Zone Implants from Stephen R. Donaldson's Gap series.

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Forget robot overlords, humankind will get finished off by IoT

John G Imrie
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Da diddly qua qua

Thanks for the memory, now I cant get the picture of Adam being hanged out of my head.

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BDSM sex rocks Drupal world: Top dev banished for sci-fi hanky-panky

John G Imrie
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WTF?

then presidential sex with prostitutes is definitely on the table

He had sex on a table?

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Murder in space: NASA orders astronauts to KILL cripples – then fire bodies back to Earth

John G Imrie
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Boffin

I'm not sure what they're simulating here either.

They are simulating what happens to a broken leg healing in space. So they know what to expect when an astronaut breaks their leg on a trip to Mars.

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Norfolk County Council sent filing cabinet filled with kids' info to a second-hand shop

John G Imrie
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Re: Recoup the cost

He didn't say it wouldn't get leaked to the local paper, or featured in the next edition of Private Eye ether. :-)

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Effort to fire Euro Patent Office president beaten back – again

John G Imrie
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Re: Why not work around the issue

Patent Office of Europe

Ha, Splitters!

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GCHQ dismisses Trump wiretap rumours as tosh

John G Imrie
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Never believe anything until it's been officially denied:- Jim Hacker, Yes minister.

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John G Imrie
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Re: They didn't deny it though, did they?

Why has this been down voted so hard. The press release calls the allegations ridiculous and says they should be ignored. It doesn't say they are false.

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BOFH: Don't back up in anger

John G Imrie
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Re: New technical terms.

Although this does inconvenience the user a little by requiring them to sit perfectly still with a hard drive vibrating away on their head, it's worth while if it means they get their data back surely?

The problem with that is if they do move you get the smell of burning hair as the lazer hits their scalp.

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John G Imrie
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Re: New technical terms.

double ROT-13 only works with ascii for full Unicode compliance you need double ROT-557056

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Face down in a Shoreditch gutter: Attack of the kickstarting hipster

John G Imrie
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Coat

Re: Restart buttons?

I don't need technology to forget peoples birthdays I can do that on my own.

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Judge issues search warrant for anyone who Googled a victim's name

John G Imrie
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Re: but what if..

What do you mean loads, I thought you where all the same person :-)

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Dormant Linux kernel vulnerability finally slayed

John G Imrie
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Re: Who needs an HDLC serial driver?

Maybe it would be better to have a choice of kernels in your distro, from "average PC" to "kitchen sink included".

Actually that's why we have different distros from Red Hat and Ubuntoo include everything to Gentoo and Linux from scratch, include only what you want and compile it for your system.

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UK's National Cyber Security Centre bungles simple Twitter Rickroll

John G Imrie
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Re: Pot meet kettle

They called the company

; DROP TABLE "COMPANIES";-- LTD

For a really good time it should have been

'); DROP TABLE "COMPANIES";-- LTD

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Algorithms no excuse for cartel behaviour, says European commish

John G Imrie
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Re: AI?

Hay look at the stone ground kernels on that slice!!!

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Tech titan pals back up Google after 'foreign server data' FBI warrant ruling

John G Imrie
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Re: "extraterritoriality"

Could we get the US Judge arrested for GBH against the English language?

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UK to block Kodi pirates in real-time: Saturday kick-off

John G Imrie
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Re: Defendants

I don't know what you call the defendants but the case is usually called a test case

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Road accident nuisance callers fined £270,000 for being absolute sh*tbags

John G Imrie
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Was about to say the same thing

These fines should be based on number of calls / texts / emails sent with no upper limit. Also it should be the company that has to prove that any of the above was legally sent. If you don't have the records how can you know you weren't breaking the law.

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Next Generation Security: No, Dorothy, there is no magic wand

John G Imrie
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Joke

Re: There is a magic wand...

*Plugs in his own keyboard* OK.

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Watt the f... Dim smart meters caught simply making up readings

John G Imrie
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Unhappy

Re: Errrmmm....

People have gone to Jail over numbers, see the Post Office Horizon Scandle

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Come in King Battistelli, your time at the Euro Patent Office is up

John G Imrie
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Re: It ain't over till the fat lady sings

This has given me almost as much fun as SCO v's the World. Though I hope Battistelli does not last as long.

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Mars orbiter FLOORS IT to avoid hitting MOON

John G Imrie
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Trollface

Re: Pfft--way to go, NASA.

There is a difference between landing and crashing.

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User rats out IT team for playing games at work, gets them all fired

John G Imrie
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You can't just fire people like that.

You can in the Land of the Free to go and find a new job.

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Europe's data protection rules set a high bar for consent – and UK ICO welcomes your thoughts

John G Imrie
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FAIL

Re: Virtual nostalgia

Could we do that for the brexit vote as well.

Note to both sides army of comutards slavering at the prospect of down voting this post into the seventh circle of Hell, did any one get sufficient information to make an informed choice.

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Congratulations IBM for 'inventing' out-of-office email. You win Stupid Patent of the Month

John G Imrie
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I've dug up RFC 3834

Published in 2004, which mentions Out of Office responses.

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