* Posts by Mark York 3

270 posts • joined 16 Jun 2009

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Your data will get hacked anyway so you might as well give up protecting it

Mark York 3
Pint

Re: Never explained

I remember the cover of that book.

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The Google Home Mini: Great, right up until you want to smash it in fury

Mark York 3
Alien

Re: Silly Valley

You really didn't miss much - Aftermath suffered from a very bad rehash of previous seasons ship footage into the clunkiest battle sequence unimaginable. It made the unmanned ore carrier & Nova Queen collision from Star One look good (& it got rehashed (with one of them switching sides) into the battle in the futile hope that the viewers wouldn't notice).

Fortunately all that crap ended once Liberator emerged damaged from the battle (with the nice fly past of two federation pursuit ships). I'd go so far as to remove the opening minutes if I'd been the director\editor.

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Mark York 3
Big Brother

Re: Silly Valley

I always got the impression he was up to stuff in the background without the key (which presumably activated his Audio I/O).

Zen's main function was to protect the ship, rejecting commands that potentially endangered it, apart from the occasional "Wisdom must be gathered, it cannot be given" type of observation.

ORAC I am closing down. I have much to do. You have engaged my circuits on your petty affairs for far too long.

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Star Wars: Big Euro cinema group can't handle demand for tickets to new flick

Mark York 3
Childcatcher

Re: it's up, but doesn't work

With Mr Lucas doing the writing, they probably won't want to hear the dialogue.

Exhibit One M'Lud "I'm haunted by the kiss that you should never have given me."

Ford famously told George Lucas, concerning the clunky dialogue in "Star Wars," "George, you can type this shit, but you sure as hell can't say it."

Harrison Ford later confirmed this: "I told George: 'You can't say that stuff. You can only type it.'"

Mark Hamill, for one, was amazed at the dedication Ford put into each and every line, stating, "He'd written things in the margins, saying the same thing basically, but his way. He had an amazing way of keeping the meaning but doing it in a really unique way for his character."

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Ex-Harrods IT man cleared of stealing company issued laptop

Mark York 3
Paris Hilton

Re: Eh?

The thing I don't get is, as you can log onto any machine using cached credentials if you are not on the domain\connected to the network (& can recall the PW used last time) & this machine was at his home, therefore presumably OFF the corporate network why was he not able to log into it as a IT Tech Guy (or did he just believe his access to it was revoked & didn't bother trying).

& why no copy of Hirens or DBAN to solve either of his two issues as a IT worker?

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What is the probability of being drunk at work and also being tested? Let's find out! Correctly

Mark York 3
Black Helicopters

Advanced testing

I was informed by a colleague in Canada, that the company had sensors down at one highly state of the art US site, that was able to detect what you had imbibed\inhaled & to what extent in the past 48 hours before you even swiped into the plants turnstiles.

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Mark York 3
Pint

"The 'drink because my wife and kids have left me because I moved the family from <somewhere nice> to Bracknell'"

Bracknell = RACAL perchance.

"rolled in at 3pm, fell asleep, then stood up and peed in his top desk drawer." = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNFz0hkPXvA

There was a similar sort of Christmas party at RACAL Seaton (Before I joined), there was sex under benches & all sorts of celebrations on return from the pub\in house supplied booze, following year Management wizened up & no such celebrations took place, they just kicked us out at lunchtime & we went straight to The George instead.

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Musk: Come ride my Big F**king Rocket to Mars

Mark York 3
Mushroom

Re: Moonbase Alpha

ITC cancelled the second season plans.

Unwilling to let the UFO 2 pre-production work go to waste, Anderson offered ITC a new series idea, unrelated to UFO, in which the Moon would be blown out of Earth orbit taking the Moonbase survivors with it.

Icon obviously because September 13th.

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Angst in her pants: Alleged US govt leaker Reality Winner stashed docs in her pantyhose

Mark York 3
Coat

Made Up Name Surely - Is Her Name Considered Serious (& Don't Call Me Shirley)!

When naming her, the parents obviously liked Big Brother (or one of it's ilk) & especially as they came equipped with a suitable surname, I hope that didn't give her middle names of Tracey Vera.

Reality T.V. Winner.

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EasyJet: We'll have electric airliners within the next decade

Mark York 3
Coat

because then you knew they were still there.

Even when the roof suddenly wasn't....

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Sysadmin tells user CSI-style password guessing never w– wait WTF?! It's 'PASSWORD1'!

Mark York 3
Coat

Re: "They looked for the password on the CD . . ."

Scheduling in Canada......

OK so I'll do your deployment on Friday afternoon, by the time it's finished you'll be able to celebrate Poets Day, but I guess I'll now have to explain what Poets Day is (again)!

Don't you come that with me, I know perfectly well what Poets Day is (Shes dropped into a thick Bristol accent) & from the sound of your voice, your not too far removed from where I grew up.

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Super Cali goes ballistic, Gatorade app is bogus: Even the sound of it is something quite atrocious

Mark York 3
Pint

Aids Recovery

Lucozade (Original) has stabilised\got me through many a bad night with the flu & on days when feeling below par. Just a shame its so hard to get in Canadaland (Mainly due to sunshine yellow colourant)

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If you need to replace anything other than your iPhone 8's battery or display, good luck

Mark York 3
Pint

Boring Barry's Sunday Lunchtime Drunken Pub Story (Every Week).

Who while attending a Renault or Peugeot training course, queried the placement of a item on a car from the service point of view, the response was.

"Your the last person we think of!".

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Fancy that! Craft which float over everything on a cushion of air

Mark York 3
Coat

Re: The one I remember best...

Thats's the one driven by Pertwee in the whole episode 2 "Chase" sequence from Planet of The Spiders, which was basically JP's bucket list of things to "have a go on" on the show before he left.

The Doctor & The Master were rescued by something like this in the sea devils, which The Master having faked a heart attack\death & then promptly nicked at the end of the story (https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2962s6).

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5DKKgZ_R2cg/maxresdefault.jpg

I'll get me coat, hat & long scarf.

PS Also took the hovercraft from IOW - Portsmouth (& back second crossing was rougher) as a kid on family holiday, a day with my father & sister seeing the "wet delights" of Portsmouth & HMS Victory.

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'All-screen display'? But surely every display is all-screen... or is a screen not a display?

Mark York 3
Pint

Re: Why do we need bezels ?

My local Boston Pizza has about 8 - 12 large screens set up with annoying crosshairs due to the bezels.

Beer icon because its Friday & the bar manager at our local one looks after us very well.

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Farewell Cassini! NASA's Saturnian spacecraft waves goodbye for its Grand Finale

Mark York 3
Coat

I think Vila Restal got there first.....

I plan to live forever, or die trying."

or

Vila: Die? I can't do that!

Avon: I'm afraid you can. It's the one talent we all share, even you.

Icon simply due to "........Because other peoples property comes naturally to me!".

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Connect at mine free Wi-Fi! I would knew what I is do! I is cafe boss!

Mark York 3
Flame

Re: Just another attempt

In CanadaLand places usually offer free WiFi Access, which basically turns out to be "Hi are you a Shaw customer, No! FOAD or see about moving to us". Telus free WiFi its more a case of a simple account creation.

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User thanked IT department for fast new server, but it had never left its box

Mark York 3
Pint

Re: Praise or accusations of work not done?

I always mentally merge the L & I in client to a U & blank out the E, in client.

It always makes me feel so much better, after dealing with especially dense clients.

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Calm down, internet. Elon's Musk-see SpaceX spacesuit is a bit generic

Mark York 3
Thumb Up

Re: aesthetics

For instance, when the Editors of the Guide were sued by the families of those who had died as a result of taking the entry on the planet Tralal literally (it said "Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts often make a very good meal for visiting tourists: instead of "Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts often make a very good meal of visiting tourists").

They claimed that the first version of the sentence was the more aesthetically pleasing, summoned a qualified poet to testify under oath that beauty was truth, truth beauty and hoped thereby to prove that the guilty party in this case was Life itself for failing to be either beautiful or true.

The judges concurred, and in a moving speech held that Life itself was in contempt of court, and duly confiscated it from all those there present before going off to enjoy a pleasant evening's ultragolf.”

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Stephen King's scary movie reboot provokes tears from 'legit clowns'

Mark York 3
Coat

I pity the fool.

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Mark York 3
Trollface

Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

I try not to think of him at all, but it may be inevitable.

Icon because that's the mental image I get when thinking of Mr Walsh.

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Mark York 3
Childcatcher

Re: It wasn't It.

As well as the cannibal grannies in Paradise Towers.

Going further back Terror of The Autons (With some of the outside action taking place around a circus, keeping with the clown theme) by Robert Holmes - I'll let the man himself explain:

""He started telling me about the guidelines he felt the programme should follow. ‘Two or three seasons ago,’ he said, ‘we had some clot who wrote the most dreadful script.

It had faceless policemen in it and plastic armchairs that went about swallowing people. I might tell you, there were questions in the House.

Mrs. Whitehouse said we were turning the nation’s children into bed-wetters’. Could it be that he was referring to my ‘Terror of the Autons’? ‘Tut, tut’, I muttered, feeling the job slipping away. ‘how awfully irresponsible’.

The elements in the story all came from plastic again. At the time there was a soap powder distributing plastic daffodils outside supermarkets, and I remembered all the warnings about children not being allowed near plastic bags. Then it all came together – I suddenly realised that all you need is a four-inch square of clingfilm to suffocate someone, and the spitting daffodils followed on.

As for the doll and the armchair, well, there were some Danish troll dolls on the gimmick market at the time and I thought they were horrible, so I used that idea. Also, those plastic inflatable armchairs were all the rage, which is why I wrote in McDermott – specifically to kill him off in that chair!"

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Nest cracks out cheaper spin of its thermostat

Mark York 3
Flame

Re: It is worth it, you just have to try it...

Nest was a simple install, with just the 3 wires, the backplate that accompanied it was discarded during the last round of redecoration & it looks rather nifty to be sure.

I got mine free by switching providers & especially glad I did as the price hiked shortly after from $269 to $329 (CAD). I'd have certainly gone for the cheaper looking\same functionality version had it been a option.

It turns itself on\off by learning the daily routine of the house inhabitants is very good, the ability to shut it right low or on for those periods via our phones is a must especially when we are going to be away longer or returning sooner than expected (especially when its -30C outside, with certain provincial (ON) powers that be wanting to tax us to the hilt for trying to stay warm in winter by slamming on carbon taxes at the least opportunity.

The only issue I have with it is that when the house cools to the minimum temperature there's a null point where it tries to fire up the furnace & then decides it's going to stop, usually solved by cranking up the required temperature so it kicks in fully.

Flame icon because at -30C - Its cold outside!

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Linux-loving lecturer 'lost' email, was actually confused by Outlook

Mark York 3
Childcatcher

Re: Basic psychology

I've had that, from reading the call notes (especially with a known issue) & going straight in to apply the fix, only for feedback to say I didn't listen to them explain the problem & was condescending.

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WannaCry-killer Marcus Hutchins denies Feds' malware claims

Mark York 3
Black Helicopters

Re: So where will DEF CON move to?

Calgary is approximately 300KM away from the Montana border.

A safer bet would be Edmonton a further 290KM to the North, with 610KM to the same border & a very nice facility called the FantasyLand Hotel..

Accomodations look like this...... http://fantasylandhotel.com/accommodations/

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Four techies flummoxed for hours by flickering 'E' on monitor

Mark York 3
Pirate

Re: "by the size of his Micro Channel Adapter"

Technical Manager of one place I worked at always wanted to dismantle broken LCD screens "To see how they work".

It always ended with him cutting his hand badly.

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Cardiff did Nazi that coming: Hackers slap Trump, swastikas, Sharia law on e-sign

Mark York 3
Big Brother

Re: Sarf Wales

I can't say I had that happen to me the last time I went for the same day turnaround service for my passport (Four+ hours waiting to collect it, was a mind-numbing experience), I think I had managed to make it back to the safety of the train home by 4pm.

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Security robot falls into pond after failing to spot stairs or water

Mark York 3
Thumb Up

More From Marvin.......(Same Episode A Few Lines Later)

FROGSTAR ROBOT:

Oh you ain’t seen nothing yet, I can take this floor out too… no trouble!

[Robot fires at floor which gives way]

FROGSTAR ROBOT:

oh dear!

[Robot falls through hole in floor]

FROGSTAR ROBOT:

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

MARVIN:

What a depressingly stupid machine.

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Jodie Who-ttaker? The Doctor is in

Mark York 3
Coat

Re: Regenerate a few more fingers?

She is the 15th incarnation (14th regeneration), but referred to as number 13.

The Five Doctors

First Doctor: Regeneration?

Fifth Doctor: Fourth.

First Doctor: Goodness me! So, there are five of me now!

I actually prefer leather coats to anoraks (AKA Atmospheric Density Jackets - The Web Planet).

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User left unable to type passwords after 'tropical island stress therapy'

Mark York 3
Holmes

Re: One week at Bigger Blue.

I take my dress code cues, from the enviroment when I interview, worst case business casual - When I started at the slaughterhouse, home casual odd jobs casual was the style of the day.

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Mark York 3
WTF?

Re: After vacation

Worked with a Mr Bean type character (dress style, mannerisms, life outlook), he commuted in from Taunton daily, one week his car was in for repair (Putting down - It used to have a mohawk that looked like a flock of Albatross's had shat on it) & he checked into a B&B, with no change of clothes at all, no hygiene products & slept in his underwear.

By Friday he was ripe to say the least.

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May the excessive force be with you: Chap cuffed after Star Trek v Star Wars row turns bloody

Mark York 3

Up a tree!

You missed something.

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Mark York 3
Pint

Re: No contest

My wife doesn't appreciate it either.

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On the couch with an AI robo-doc asking me personal questions

Mark York 3
Pint

Not under the Hanshott First Rule it isn't.

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French general accused of nicking fast jet for weekend trips to the Sun

Mark York 3
Mushroom

When I Were A Lad.....

My first proper job was working at a airport where they serviced DC3's.

Quite a few of the staff used to suppliment their petrol bill by siphoning off a gallon or three of AVGas (including one foreman known as "Hovis" who was found in the act by a colleague at 3am after returning a late night run of taking urgent parts to Birmingham EM).

One other young lad decided to run his little moped on it full time draining fuel from a couple of DC'3s parked outside, those of us on 2 wheels used them as covered parking space (Something like a Honda Sky 50), completely knackered his engine.

I dont think he ran his new machine on it after that

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Dixons Carphone stirs PC Curry, reports 10% profit gravy

Mark York 3
Mushroom

Re: They have their uses

Rings a bell - The outlet literally backed on to my rear garden & had to walk through the service road\delivery loading area to get to the store main entrance.

Could or would they let me transport a dishwasher home 200 yards (I had to circumnavigate a fence or 200 feet as the unladen swallow flies) on one of their trolleys from the rear service door that I could see from my kitchen door - No they would not.

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PC rebooted every time user flushed the toilet

Mark York 3
Pint

Re: Sea-skimming microwave

Something similar years ago in the 80's\90's, new (first one in the house) colour TV, would lose colour information on a house near a estuary, the aerial installer had aimed at the transmitter & got a colour picture "satisfied job done".

As the tide washed in\out the signal level dropped off & the TV just about kept enough of the signal to display in glorious mono.

Aiming at a different transmitter solved the issue.

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That minutes-long power glitch? It's going to cost British Airways £80m, IAG investors told

Mark York 3
Paris Hilton

Re: Uh oh..

Can we have a Jenna Stannis icon instead?

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f4/5e/05/f45e05b4613f2bbd70ef5b49e5dcad48.jpg

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BA passengers caught in crossfire of Heathrow baggage meltdown

Mark York 3
Black Helicopters

Safety In The Balance

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZbH62Bn0oM

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Fear the dentist? Strap on some nerd goggles

Mark York 3
Trollface

Death of Popular Local Dentist*

I have little fear of dentists after encountering good ones recommended to me first by a friend & then the wife, following experiences with the dentist(s) I had as a kid & generally find it a relaxing experience.

Since moving to Canada things have really got that much better with the care, including a balloon rubber type of screen that sits behind your teeth & stops flakes of hot tooth dust falling down your throat while the drilling takes place.

*Popular (As reported in the local paper) in the respect he wasn't the dentist in Marathon Man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzw1_2b-I7A

Troll icon has what appears to be a full set of teeth.

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Currys PC World given a spanking for misleading laptop savings ads

Mark York 3
Thumb Up

Staples

Had a few nice higher end laptops (ex-display) from Staples (Canada) & from my local branch in a small town outside of Calgary (Helps if you know the sales staff too) at good prices.

Had some nice misc nice purchases from the clearance bins\end of lines, as its a smaller town the manager usually applies a 25% discount (at the till) as a minimum right across the board on some of the better items.

I think my Sony 1080P camcorder cost me about $115.

I treat Best Buy\The Empty Units Formally Known As Future Shop in the same vein as Currys\PC World.

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It came from space! Two-headed flatworm stuns scientists

Mark York 3
Thumb Up

Didn't I Tell You Baby I'm Zaphod Beeblebrox

Was that a double post or each head answering seperately?

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Sharp claims Hisense reverse-ferreted its US telly licence deal

Mark York 3
Facepalm

ITT\Grundig Anyone?

The last time I saw Grundig on a product it was on a 5 quid metal torch sold in Home Bargains or similar store in 2008/9

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We're not saying we're living in a simulation but someone's simulated the universe in a computer

Mark York 3
Thumb Up

DNA

ASSISTANT ARCTURAN PILOT:

Well you know what they say, don’t ya? They had to move to a bigger planet because he got so fat he kept sliding off the old one. I mean I’ve heard ya know, I’ve heard they’ve created a whole electronically synthesized universe in one of their offices so they can go and research stories during the day and still go to parties in the evening. Yeah, bloody clever, of course, but it’s got nothing to do with the real galaxy is it? Nothing to do with life.

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Please do not scare the pigeons – they'll crash the network

Mark York 3
Alert

Many Years Ago

Not sure where I heard it (might have been on El Reg) about a shit\urine flooded comms\electrical room in a basement.

Basically......

The building designer\plumbing contractor had routed all the black water into a straight pipe for the entire building (not sure if a office or tower block) with a 90 degree bend at the very bottom.

The inertial mass of free-falling turds with gallons of falling water from the top floors, had over time weakened the joint\pipe & the thing finally gave way. So the pipes contents instead of carrying on the journey to the sewers, the cellar comms room had taken on a new role as a septic tank.

Something not quite similar happened when a "restroom" flooded at a slaughterhouse I used to work at.

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I fought Ohm's Law and the law won: Drone crash takes out power to Silicon Valley homes

Mark York 3
Black Helicopters

Retirement Sucks.

He should leave the flying to Stringfellow Hawke.

http://airwolf.wikia.com/wiki/Michael_Coldsmith-Briggs_III

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First-day-on-the-job dev: I accidentally nuked production database, was instantly fired

Mark York 3
Flame

Caught Out At Least Once By Dodgy Doc's

Installing & configuring new servers in branches of a Canadian bank.

They came pre-configured up to a point & then it was just a case of following the documentation until one crucial point where the required configuration details have just been input by yourself........

...... the document tails to a point where the bottom half of the page is blank, the next is also blank, as is the first half of the next one..........

Which finally puts up a image of a Stop sign & on the next full page says "Do not press enter at this point, if you have you will have to reimage the server from scratch using your provided reimage media"

This is not what you want to realise you have done at 12.30am.

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BA IT systems failure: Uninterruptible Power Supply was interrupted

Mark York 3
Facepalm

Had a similar situation with a planned building shutdown, I was scheduled to be on-site for the testing of all desktop equipment 9am Sunday morning at our office suite.

Nobody had switched the bypass on the UPS before Friday shutdown (servers powered down safely though), UPS dead, India thought I would be at my desk 40 miles away from where the building was at 3am & left lots of messages about why were the servers not coming back up remotely.

I turned up on schedule & in the dark (figuratively), electrical contractors for the UPS had to turn up & test each battery in turn just in case one "blew" when power was restored.

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Mark York 3
Holmes

Re: If it got interrupted...

At one facility I worked at & I don't have the full story of why......

The offshore support insisted on the former plant Sysadmin hitting the plants BRB, pictures were sent to the remote guy via email, he confirmed that was the button he wanted to be pushed & goodness gracious me it was going to be pushed. He was advised again of what it was that would be pushed & the consequences, the plant manager dutifully informed of what was required, what the offshore wanted & what would be the fallout.

& so it came to pass that the BRB was pushed on the word of the Technically Competent Support representative.

(Paraphrasing here........)

"Goodness gracious me, Why your plant disappearing from network?"

"Because the BRB you insisted that was the button you wanted pushing, despite my telling you that it was never to be pushed under pain of death has just shut down the entire plant."

I think it took until about 15 minutes before production was due to commence the following day to get everything back up & running.

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'My PC needs to lose weight' says user with FAT filesystem

Mark York 3
Mushroom

Giving the users what they ask for......

"Rick kindly arranged a new laptop that was actually 1Kg heavier and ran Windows NT. The second part of the fix was to format its hard drive with the NTFS file system"

FTFY

Based on my own experience's with people (all within a short distance of each other) at a certain pharmaceutical company with someone that declined a desktop refresh because he had previously petitioned his boss for a laptop instead.

Request granted......

Except he didn't get a sparkling clean one from the refresh stock (They were all allocated to replace laptops like for like) & got one that was still in scope for support for another year (His howls of complaint were quite amusing to my ears & those of his colleagues as he had been lording it over them for a month over his upgrade), he was shortly after more upset to discover that he couldn't get his desktop refresh as that machine had been reassigned to one that wasn't budgeted for replacement, but had since failed as out of warranty.

Or the guy that decided to jump the queue & get one ordered from another branch of the business (Head Office) & got annoyed when my group didn't have access to support\fix it locally.

Another queue jumper requested a higher spec machine transfer from a department closure (he got it) only to discover 3 weeks later after also lording it over with co-workers when I replaced all their machines.

"Wheres mine?"

"Ohhh Your old one was removed from the refresh project as out of project scope as you requested it be removed for disposal\transfer of assets, your now current machine will be replaced next year".

"Can I have my old one back to get the refresh?"

"Sorry wiped & decomissioned & on the pile, the replacement has been re-allocated to a machine that was due to be replaced, but the budget wasn't there to do so unless a upgrade wasn't required due to natural wastage"

A year later he was finally crowing about his new machine again, only to discover that the desktop replacement was of pretty much the same spec, but the chipset & software build now used a generic driver for the IDE controller instead of a specific (NT) one & that it was obviously slower in performance by comparison (Based on build & boot times).

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