* Posts by N2

1176 posts • joined 12 Jun 2009

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UK defence secretary ponders £50m hit to terminate Capita recruiting contract

N2

Why

Does the governement continually opt for this crappy outfit?

Were it three strikes and your out they would have been off the list years ago

3
0

Microsoft points to a golden future where you can make Windows 10 your own

N2

Re: What about the stuff that we really don't want...

wan't ?

6
0
N2

Re: What about the stuff that we really don't want...

Which re-appears at the next update

Best policy is to uninstall everything

6
1

On the third day of Windows Microsoft gave to me: A file-munching run of DELTREE

N2

Re: Welcome to....

'...beta test.'

Surely you mean Alpha test? Sorry but crap like that would just not make beta.

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Day two – and Windows 10 October 2018 Update trips over Intel audio

N2

Re: Re: Edge?

The faster browser than Chrome thats not quite as much spyware by design. And with u-block origin its very nice to use.

AC, That's some fairly powerful stuff you are snorting.

41
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Still using Skype? Good news! After HOURS of meetings, Microsoft reckons it knows when you're Not Active

N2

Re: Everything Microsoft touches dies

Skype dropped of my 'acceptable' list when MS bought it.

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UK.gov asks biz for ideas on how to 'overcome' data privacy concerns in NHS

N2
Trollface

Re: How about...

Thats far too obvious and might even result in people trusting it but I wouldnt hold my breath.

Whats really needed is a multi million pound contract that goes over budget and delivers too little too late by Crapita. Just like the last ones did.

6
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Haven't updated your Adobe PDF software lately? Here's 85 new reasons to do it now

N2
Thumb Down

No thanks

Got rid of everything Adobe years ago, seemed bloated and slow.

Don't like their cloud 'ransom ware' offerings for photgraphers either.

4
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Brit startup plans fusion-powered missions to the stars

N2

Wonderful?

Why don't these people do something useful - for the rest uf us that is,

like producing a reactor that will power all the electric cars?

0
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Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

N2

Why are sat-nav directions always so hopeless?

Because they are, mine once suggested I divert and take a round tour of an open prison (you might call them council estates) on my way home along a route I drove frequently.

I sensed something malevolent and carried straight on, locking my doors, just in case.

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Amazon Alexa outage: Voice-activated devices are down in UK and beyond

N2

Re: Proof the Cloud is about surveillance not practicality, its badly / wrongly designed for IoT

Soon all appliances will be listening in...

To our Rayburn? Maybe not.

5
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Office 2019 lumbers to the stage once more as Microsoft promises future releases

N2

Re: Classified and commercially sensitive documents?

"Off we go to LibreOffice from around 2021 i should think"

Why wait?

3
1

As one Microsoft Windows product hauls itself out of the grave, others tumble in

N2
Trollface

Re: Wait until the last sentence

Let me guess, it was useful but now it's out of fashoin and has to go.

We have useless new ways to do familiar things.

1
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Click your heels, um, mouse thrice and you've quickly got Ubuntu on Hyper-V in Win 10 Pro

N2

Re: any chance I wonder...

Of reciprocal work on smoother running of Windows ontop of Linux...?

Agreed, I'd prefer Linux on bare metal

6
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TV Licensing admits: We directed 25,000 people to send their bank details in the clear

N2

Be wary of scam e-mails?

Is that it?

Unfortunately all the UK has is not fit for purpose toothless watch dogs, spitting fines, which just pushes up prices.

How about a good prison sentence for the idiots that concocted this?

5
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Microsoft accidentally let encrypted Windows 10 out into the world

N2

Re: How dare you!

I will not download any release from Microsoft until at least 3 years or more after it has gone Gold.

Just looking at a change to 7, maybe next year.

3
1
N2
Trollface

Amazing

"The update consumed RAM at a prodigious rate for some before falling over"

Nothing new then?

5
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A basement of broken kit, zero budget – now get the team running

N2

Indeed

"Seems like the boss deserved to drink "funny" flavoured coffee."

Give the mug a good rimming first.

37
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Like tax? Love networks? UK taxmen have a job just for you

N2

Twaddle

Just an opportunity for some over promoted, brown nosed seat polisher to grab a large pension pot

Don't worry if you make a cock of it old chap, you'll get an OBE or something.

1
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Guess who just bought Maplin? Dragons' Den celebrity biz guy Peter Jones

N2

Bought for a tenner

Expect most of the stores to close.

Takeover buisness as usual.

1
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Microsoft: You don't want to use Edge? Are you sure? Really sure?

N2

Don't want to use Edge?

Er, no thank you I will never use Edge even if it was the last web browser on earth.

Microsoft set the gold standard for crapiness with Internet Explorer and Edge was just refined shite.

How many times do we have to say 'You cannot polish a turd'?

5
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It's September 2018, and Windows VMs can pwn their host servers by launching an evil app

N2
Trollface

Microsoft & Adobe

No surprise there, lather, rinse, repeat for ad-infinitum

2
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Guess who's still in charge of your gas safety, Brits? Capita

N2

Crapita and gas...

What could possibly go wrong?

Just add a large dose of 'outsourced to India'

2
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A boss pinching pennies may have cost his firm many, many pounds

N2

PP Network

Yes, we had a 10 base T network and if anybody kicked their PC the whole lot borked.

It was eventually replaced with CAT5e and the number of double sockets for which I'd provisioned was questioned, I added extra knowing they would take away, needless to say that got ignored.

1
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N2

Penny pinching boss

The ruination of many a good company, it usually ends up costing more long term.

1
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Sextortion scum armed with leaked credentials are persistent pests

N2

According to them

I can still hit the screen when I onanism, which they think that is shamefull

I would consider it fairly good at 60

1
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N2

Postal Blackmail?

One of Python's finest.

2
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UK.gov went ahead with under-planned, under-funded IT upgrade? Sounds about right

N2

Diddnt they do well?

3/13 essential functions working?

No doubt they'll find some metric to congratulate themselves and award bonuses.

2
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I've seen the future of consumer AI, and it doesn't have one

N2

Really can't see the point

It could probably tell you the square root of a tin of beans, how many tins you have etc etc, but be unable to open them.

4
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Microsoft gives Windows 10 a name, throws folks a bone

N2

Re: "LibreOffice only does a majority of what home users need"

'In short, Microsoft is the crappiest software supplier for my type of business.'

I would say: In short, Microsoft is the crappiest and most expensive software supplier for my type of business.

1
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Mozilla changes Firefox policy from ‘do not track’ to ‘will not track’

N2

...but most people misunderstand the scope of what is done with their info.

And look as if you have just spat in their face when you try to explain.

6
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You want how much?! Israel opts not to renew its Office 365 vows

N2

Excellent news

who needs it when the free alternatives are really very good

13
2

Your Phone prematurely ejected, Skype texting on the way, and 900 more years of Windows

N2
Trollface

900 Years?

Perhaps they need it to fix [insert application of choice] and all the other Win bollox?

2
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UK.gov ploughs cash into creaky police technology

N2

£100 M funding

How the tils at 'The Ivy' will be ringing & yes, thats just enough to cover expenses, not the real cost of the potential Crapita MOAFU's to follow

(Mother Of All Fuck Ups)

0
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Apple laughing all the way to the bank – with profits of $5.3m per hour

N2

Re: Mac sales declined nine per cent over the quarter

Agreed.

That silly tube like MacPro thing

Batteries that cannot easily be replaced

Anything else that easily cannot be replaced

shit keyboards that don't last

fixing stupid problems that dont need fixing in the vain cause of 'innovation'

To name a few

9
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Capita still squats on top of the UK's software and IT services heap

N2

The Crapita winning formulae...

Bid really low

Deliver crap, usually late

Explain that it will take more time & money to fix

client is so deep in it, they agree

repeat above two steps as required

5
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Windows 10 Insiders see double as new builds hit the deck – with promises to end Update Rage

N2

Re: Whats wrong with

Seems good, just needs clippy to animate it:

Hello would you like me to fuck-up your PC?

Options:

Now

Just when you're really very busy and doing summit important

Next time you are away from the office

Overnight

At the time of:

The last two will be greyed out

11
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N2

Re: Predictive Fuckups

It used to be fine, you could choose from:

Turn em off

Pick what you needed

Or everything

Just what was wrong with that?

31
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I predict a riot: Amazon UK chief foresees 'civil unrest' for no-deal Brexit

N2

Re: Burn down the high st

Think the councils with thier ever increasing rates & over zealous parking wardens have done a fine job.

7
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Microsoft still longs to be a 'lifestyle' brand, but the cupboard looks bare

N2
Trollface

Lifestyle brand?

The further I keep Microsoft from my 'lifestyle' what ever that is, the better.

1
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Wearable hybrids prove the bloated smartwatch is one of Silly Valley's biggest mistakes

N2

I have a smart watch

I paid £330 for it and some 25 years later I could sell it for £500

1
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Azure certifications are awful, Microsoft admits, so it has made new ones

N2

Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer

Once asked me, whats that you are doing in MS-Dos?

Me: Oh, I'm just mapping network some drives, then I will add it to users the logon script

MCSE: oooh, how do you do that then?

4
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Microsoft: For God's sake, people, cut down on the meetings!

N2

Meetings

I'd walk out after 45 minutes, if you can't get it by then theres no point.

& power point should be limited to 12 slides, after that I'm asleep.

2
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Automated payment machines do NOT work the same all over the world – as I found out

N2

Your hovercraft is full of eels...

Instead of directions to the station, it stated: 'please fondle my bum'

The joys of self service stations, at least most of them here in France speak the language of the credit cards issuing country.

Parfois.

2
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The cybercriminal's cash cow and the marketer's machine: Inside the mad sad bad web ad world

N2

What ads?

Updated hosts file with about 30,000 advertising shyte host names resolved to 127.0.0.1

Then theres AdBlock Ultimate with a few of my own scripts or filters, whatever

Then theres NoScript

Been a while since Ive seen an advert on-line and I'm not missing them at all.

3
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Registry to ban Cyrillic .eu addresses even if you've paid for them

N2

why not ban

.bid, .date, .shite, .tools, .etc .as .some .fucking .wassock .gave .these .away .to .all .the .fekking .spammers

.knuts

3
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Google leaps on the platform formerly known as Firefox with $22m splurge for KaiOS

N2

Re: Please keep it open

...and don't send data home without permission.

Agreed, but don't you have to agree that everything belongs to Google?

6
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UK taxman has amassed voice profiles of 5.1 million taxpayers

N2

Re: I'm one of those 5M

Also, they send out letters demanding action "within 7 days of the date of this letter", and you don't actually receive them until the 7th day.

I must admit of all the nipple tweaking, cunt twanging practises big business & arse hat organisations like these have adopted over a number of years, this is one of the worst.

Along with those "here to help" slogans.

3
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Happy birthday, you lumbering MS-DOS-based mess: Windows 98 turns 20 today

N2

Re: The ONLY things going for it were

Yes, I ran 2K well to 2010 most of the other versions were bloated, power sapping, gilded turds.

I suppose 7 was OK, but my 2K box was so reliable, loved it warts 'n all.

4
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Unbreakable smart lock devastated to discover screwdrivers exist

N2

Geek lock

Who needs a code?

Any battery powered angle grinder would do.

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