* Posts by Thomas 4

1531 posts • joined 11 Jun 2009

Story gone

Thomas 4
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Re: keeping my fingers crossed!

Here's hoping you don't shoot the lappy his way.

Amazon crimps free Kindle 3G surfing

Thomas 4

I'm sorry sir

But you appear to be posting in the wrong comments section if you were looking for beneficial feedback.

Apple wins EU-wide Samsung Galaxy Tab 7.7 ban

Thomas 4


...does anyone else have the urge to lock the respective heads of Apple and Samsung in some dark, forgotten dungeon somewhere and refuse to let them out until they stop behaving like spoilt children?

The heads needn't necessarily be still attached to the bodies.

Darth Vader is a pansy

Thomas 4

Silly man

If your next computer is blood red, how do you expect it to remain undetected while conducting covert aerial bombing raids?

*My* computer on the other hand is a perfectly sensible black colour and is so stealthy I have trouble finding the bloody thing at times.

Gamer fails STAM roll, dies after 40-hour Diablo III stretch

Thomas 4

Re: Cause of Death?

No...wouldn't work.

Gauntlet was fun.

Thomas 4

Bloody kids

The youth of today have no understanding about how their bodies work.

It's a bloody Fortitude save, not a STAM roll. Jesus.

Humanity increasingly sitting on collective arse

Thomas 4

Re: I'd post a comment...

I'd upvote this but........

Sony preps PS3 with old-school design

Thomas 4

Old School

A Sony executive was quoted as saying "We're really going back to our old school roots with this new design. We're even restoring Other OS and PS2 backwards compatability," before collapsing on the floor in a heap of laughter.

Cockfighting Reg hack cursed with cancer

Thomas 4

Re: To be fair..

If it wasn't for Lester's article I wouldn't be on my way to Devon to pick up a load of chickens *right this very second* and looking for a small out of the way arena.

Thomas 4

Re: Oh god

Yeah, he really fell fowl of them this time.

Thomas 4

Re: pish

Put me down for a fiver on the piranhas and a tenner on the badger - those things are vicious little bastards.

Hubble finds fifth moon orbiting Pluto

Thomas 4

Re: Gotta be the first to say it...

That's no planet either........

Disappearing space dust belt baffles boffins

Thomas 4

Re: Scientists are on the lookout

Or, alternatively, Unicron did it.

Startup pitches £64 hackable Android console

Thomas 4

It's good...

...but it's no Chrome Box. For which we all breathe a huge sigh of relief.

CERN catches a glimpse of Higgs-like boson

Thomas 4

Re: Good news for the masses

Good lord that was dreadful, breakfast. You should be appalled.

US federal boffins insist that mermaids DON'T exist

Thomas 4

Re: "typical of a cetacean"

A good catch AC and as always I thank the El Reg Comment Crew for pointing out a minor technicality as the basis for tossing an entire argument out of the window.

The point I was trying to make is that both whales and sharks undergo underwater docking procedures when they mate. But hey, when the mermaids finally take over the world, I'll be happy to inform them that you're ok with just wanking yourself into the open ocean while the rest of us work on the building of mermaid-human hybrids.

Thomas 4

Re: "typical of a cetacean"


A few moments thought would suggest that given the upper half of a mermaid is mammalian (often abundantly so), it makes sense that the lower half should share mammalian traits as well. So instead of all that nonsense of squirting a cloud of eggs out, the lower half of a mermaid would share traits with a whale or possibly a shark.

So what I'm saying is that you still get to hide the pink sea snake under the kelpy forest.

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Re: The truth about MERMAIDS:

The truth is mermaids are not found in American waters but instead near Japan. A witness to a battle between Cthulhu and the Amazonian Mermaids gave Japan its flourishing tentacle porn industry.

True story.

What is the Nokia Secret Plan if Windows 8 isn't Windows gr8?

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Re: Oh dear, Nokia

Wait, wait, wait....Nokia had a Plan A?

Naked Scarlett Johansson pic snatch 'is worth 6 years' porridge'

Thomas 4


Seriously, let me know how that plays out.

Thomas 4
IT Angle

The man is a fool

$150,000 for some extremely dull nudie pictures when the web has a plethora of very high-quality wrist exercisers for a fraction of the cost.


Not that I know anything about that, being a respectable gentleman.

Nexus 7 and Surface: A bonanza for landfill miners

Thomas 4
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An extremely pessimistic article this

So what you're saying is that Google and Microsoft will never be able to catch up with the iPad and therefore should just let Apple have free reign in the tablet market?

You say that the reason the Kindle and iPad are successful is because of their content market - a point I agree with. But content does not grow on trees - device first, then the content grows. Expecting a device to launch an iPad-equivalent amount of content available is foolishness.

Reg hack attempts gutsiest expenses claim EVER

Thomas 4

Re: Errrr....

True but that napkin specifically says a total of 9800.

You know what these reporter types are like.

London cops order Julian Assange to turn himself in

Thomas 4


"Why certainly officer, I'll be only too pleased this little diplomatic safe haven I have at the moment and put myself in British custody because your legal process has really been going in my favour lately."

Ministers consult public on 'opt in for smut' plans

Thomas 4

Re: There will be trouble

The problem is, when people "think of the children", they don't [i]actually[/i] think of the children, they just think about how they can avoid awkward conversations with them. And then bad shit like this happens.

ACs - I have a lot of LGBT friends I speak to online in a very close community and I think I can say that if it hadn't been for that community and the access they have to it, a lot of them would have followed a similar path.

*proudly ticks "I am a disgusting pervert rather than a morally conflicted prude" box*

Half the team at the heart of the RBS disaster WERE in India

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Re: Three things

Especially if Bob doesn't have much incentive to explain it properly and lot of incentive to watch the system go titsup.

Raspberry Pi to skipper microship across Atlantic

Thomas 4

Re: Tupperware

You know, this sort of input is usually reserved for the El Reg SPB.

We've conquered space, next stop the ocean! Maybe we could have a Pi powered mini sub exploring an ocean trench - wouldn't that be awesome? =D

Dell extends XPS laptop line

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Seriously, help me out here

This isn't a troll post, I am genuinely puzzled.

Why on earth would anyone by an Ultrabook? They seem to be extremely expensive but offer little or no more performance than a standard laptop. Does the thinness really justify such a whopping great mark up in price? Or am I missing something here?

69,000 sign petition to save TV-linker O'Dwyer from US extradition

Thomas 4

Re: @Mad Mike

"I thought the idea of extradition was for serious offences only."

Making money in Hollywood is srs bsns.

Microsoft: no plans to make own phones

Thomas 4

Re: Makes sense

HP hasn't killed their tablet because "HP is totally commited to the future of WebOS."

I'm sure if I say it enough times I might actually believe it.

Chinese 'nauts couple successfully without help of machines

Thomas 4

Re: Taikonauts

It's the sequel to Tim Schafer's legendary platformer - SET IN SPACE!

RBS collapse details revealed: Arrow points to defective part

Thomas 4

If only.....

I just saw this on another news site:

"The boss of Royal Bank of Scotland and NatWest has told Sky News that senior management will face "proper accountability" over the computer chaos when deciding on bonuses."

When popped into Google Translate (Bullshit -> English):

"We're only going to award ourselves a 1 million pound bonus instead of the 2 million we originally planned. The poor shmucks we've been running ragged with overtime this past week will receive fuck all and we'd really like our ex-IT staff to stop laughing at us now please."

Speedball 2 Brutal Deluxe

Thomas 4

Re: No mention..

Xenon 2 was the first PC game I ever played. Couldn't remember whether it was a Bitmap game or not.

It was, however, awesome.

Thomas 4
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Not bad...

....but my favourite Bitmap Brother's game was The Chaos Engine. Classic style shooter with chunky solid graphics for the time. If anyone knows where I can get an emu version, I'd appreciate it.

Assange: Australian neglect made me flee to Ecuador embassy

Thomas 4

The man is grinding my gears now

My mind is finding it harder and harder to associate "Julian Assange (TM)" with "Wikileaks" and easier to associate him with the term "bail jumping, narcissistic publicity whore".

The US don't need to go to any lengths to kill the credibility of Wikileaks, sadly. Julian Asshole is doing a superlative job himself.

William Shatner confirms Devon town actually prostitute free

Thomas 4


You must meet the most interesting sources when you work for El Reg.

Sony slams Nintendo Wii U functionality

Thomas 4

Re: No shit, Sherlock

This makes the assumption that the 3DS isn't completely dead already.

Fatties are 'destroying the world'

Thomas 4

Re: Does it help?

Well, if we're trying to get rid of useless weight, we could probably start with the guys that wrote the paper.

Tomb Raider dev denies Croft rape scene

Thomas 4

Re: How does that work, exactly?


I've just watched the trailer and Lara's various reactions, not just in that scene, which frankly was too quick for me to make out clearly what was going on but overall, she does seem to have been reduced to a spineless wimp that complains all the time. What happened to the Lara that offered naff James Bond like quips before blasting someone in the face?

Thomas 4

Re: Disgusted.

I am also disgusted - worrying about pointless crap like this when they should be either desperately trying to inject decent gameplay into this dead horse of a series.

Logitech's G600 mouse packs keypad too

Thomas 4

Nice idea, but....

I play a fair few MMOs but I don't think a mouse with that many buttons in such a small area is a good idea, especially for those of us with huge sausage digits. I can all too easily imagine hitting the wrong buttons by mistake and sending a raid encounter up Clusterfuck Creek.

My current dekstop uses a Razr Nostromo gaming pad and a Deathadder mouse. Same number of buttons but much, much more managable.

Supreme Court dismisses Assange bid to reopen extradition case

Thomas 4

Re: Is he still news?

Mr Assange (TM) is a valiant defender of free speech and liberty, except for those bits of it currently rotting away in a military prison on his behalf.

Raspberry Pi IN THE SKY: Wallet-sized PC is disaster drone brain

Thomas 4

This is a true application of technology

Low cost but the potential to help so many people, even if it's just with basic post-disaster mapping and sensor recordings. I wish them the very best of luck.

Male, female Chinese 'nauts prep for trip to Heaven and back

Thomas 4


That's the second time this week I've clicked on an article, only to find it completely devoid of zero-gravity goings-on. I feel like I'm being shamelessly trolled here.

HBO wants royal price for Iron Throne

Thomas 4

Re: upgrade option

That'll be an extra $10,000.

Thomas 4

Please tell me that's a typo

$18,000 for some guy to put a chair in a van, drive a few hundred kilometres and chuck it unsigned on a driveway?

I am in the wrong line of work.

Gov exposes 8,000 GPs so punters can pick one

Thomas 4

A brilliant idea

So you find out your local GP surgery is staffed exclusively by assholes and when you try to go to one of the "nice" ones, you find out you're not in their catchment area.

Net benefit - Fuck all squared in a box.

China a lover, not a fighter ... IN SPAAAAAACE

Thomas 4


Read the title, was hoping for an article on very high altitude nookie.

Legendary sci-fi fantasy author Ray Bradbury exits planet Earth

Thomas 4

Re: Something Wicked This Way Comes

The Illustrated Man was the first book of his I read at the age of 15 and subsequently plowed my way through the rest of my parent's Bradbury collection.

Just trying to remember - which book was it that had a short story about a city that was alive and ate a bunch of explorers?

Tape lives: LTO-6 rolls out – with more than TWICE the capacity

Thomas 4
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*Real* men store their data on tapes, then cry when they get a Read Error B and have to load it all over again.

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