* Posts by frank ly

6112 posts • joined 10 Jun 2009

Airport plods seize man with electric vibro-pleasure shoes

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Cattle Class

"..all passengers board without clothes and carry on.."

Great idea, no need for millimetric wave perv-scanners in that case. Just the occasional 'invasive' procedure.

Samsung NaviBot robot cleaner

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Boffin

Fascinated By The Domestic Lives Of Others

Nigel, Is that some kind of home made breakout strip, just above the skirting board in the bedroom? (I hope it's not a home made mains splice.)

Report reams IT admins for secretly snapping student pics

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Stop

Whitewash Job, Big one

"..secretly captured more than 58,000 images of students .."

"..50,000 of those images were taken after the computers had been recovered,.."

"..More than 400 images were secretly snapped of Blake Robbins,.."

That is bad enough...... then..

"..report found no proof that anyone deliberately set out to spy on students,.."

"..or that once captured, the images were downloaded..."

"..although the report said none of the images included nudity..." Oh, how do they know that unless the report authors checked by looking at downloaded images???

I'm not sure who is the most freaky here, the school IT people or the report writers.

This is a whitewash job with a big, thick brush.

Canonical explains Ubuntu unfree video choice

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WTF?

A 'Community' Solution?

After many years, the Linux 'community' seems to be a well established and nicely working 'machine' that can turn out very good operating systems, and much more.

Why can't they put their enormous combined brain power into developing an audio and video encoding/decoding/storage system that is truly FOSS? Is it harder than writing an entire operating system?

Yes, I know there is Theora, etc; but it seem that Theora is treading on someone's patent toes. Are FOSS supportive lawyers checking patent texts and seeing if there really is a breach of IP with all this?

Why not get together in an organised way and develop the ultimate, free, working codec and give it as a gift to the world. Instead of arguing and worrying and messing about, just say 'sod it, we're starting from scratch and we're going for gold'. Or would that result in 'splitism' and sectarian arguments about what colour scheme the installer should present to the user?

Broken-hearted email servers mark LoveBug anniversary

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ten years ago

I picked up a love-bug type of infection ten years ago. It's not something I'm proud of or want to remember though.

Oz gov in confusion over net filter plans

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Terminator

Me too !

I was certified when I was a kid. I just wanted to know how the neighbour's cats worked. I offered to buy them new ones. Such a fuss......

Phillies fan tasered for field incursion

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Headmaster

Taze, Tazed, Tazzen ? Maybe

I had tazzen the perp, but he twitched so I tazed him again. He screamed, "Don't taze me bro."

If we use 'Hoover' as an example, perhaps..... Or is a hoover something that hooves?

DVLA off-road system seriously off-message

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WTF?

Just a minute....

"...on the grounds that he had failed to notify it when took his vehicle off the road (SORN)"

Why should it matter if you take your vehicle off the road??

If I take my vehicle off the road (e.g. park it up in my garage for months, for whatever reason), then what harm does that do to anyone if I don't formally tell them? The only situation in which you should need to inform the DVLA or 'prove' anything is if you are using the SORN procedures to claim refund of vehicle tax or exemption from it.

Have I misunderstood the situation in this case, or is there an aspect that I've missed?

Microsoft: 'Prepare for 15 billion more clients'

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Taking Care Of Billions Of 'Em

"Andonova was ready with examples. .......Sure, we can do that...........Sure, we can do that..........We'll take care of that."

She obviously worked her way up through the ranks of marketing. Gives you confidence like no other.

ICO targets lost laptop breaches under tougher fine regime

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Happy

Peace Little Fishes!

Let's not fight among ourselves when there are bigger and nastier fish out there trying to bite us :)

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Stop

Legal Beagles

"Smith wants to see mandatory notification in cases where personal data might have been exposed but not in situations where an encrypted laptop was lost, for example. He also wants to see private investigators who used trickery to obtain confidential records jailed. "

"MIGHT have been exposed" who will decide if it 'might have'?

"ENCRYPTED laptop" what is the definition of 'encrypted'? (I use ROT-13 so it's ok to lose the laptop and not report it)

"used TRICKERY to obtain.." what is 'trickery'? how is it legally defined?

If you thought he situation was bad right now, wait until these ideas get written up as law.

Steve Jobs: mystery patent pool to attack Ogg Theora

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Reason

"Sounds like this bunch intends to sink it, or at least try. Why?"

I think you'll find that money is involved. Lots of it.

Researchers spy on BitTorrent users in real-time

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Launch Legal Missiles

"The results are about 70 percent accurate."

That should be good enough for the Mandy-Bill to be used against you. Don't argue, they have 'computer evidence'.

Ten Essential... Netbook Accessories

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Wireless Mouse and Keyboard

I laughed in disbelief at £70 for the Logitek wireless optical mouse.

Go to PC World and spend £18 on the PC-Line wireless keyboard and wireless optical mouse kit.

It may not be stylish and the keyboard action is clunky (it's slim and small and neat though); but it does the job very well and it's only £18 for keyboard and mouse !!

I often use this arrangement at home with my netbook connected up to a 19" LCD monitor. Apart from the speed of the netbook, it's just like using a real computer :)

Gizmodo faces visit from cops over 'found' iPhone

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The law as it is written

"..if the found item is valued over $400 .."

Ah,... so what is the retail price of this item?

The person who 'sold' it on to Gizmodo was not selling the phone itself, He was selling an opportunity to an author. After that author had finished a session of deep admiration of the item, he returned it to its original owner. There was never any intention to deprive the rightful owner of the item and many efforts were made contact the owner and make arrangements to return it.

It was the owner's responsibility to go to trouble of making proper enquiries and then traveling to pick it up from the finder, not the other way around.

Obama open sources custom White House code

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Alert

scalability is good

"One of the main reasons that we adopted an open source solution is that it gives us scalability,.."

Is this true? If you want scalability then you should not choose proprietary (closed source) software?

'Gossips' say Apple will acquire ARM

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Stop

You're smudging the issue

yes you are

Cybercrooks befuddled by Icelandic volcano name

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Extreme spelling skills- not needed

I don't know how to spell Eyjafjallajökull either, I just copied and pasted from your article into my scareware mail-shots.

The way I see it, I have few competitors on this one so it's a good opportunity.

(I know, I'm assuming that El Reg has got it right, but who would check it anyway?)

Space Station lightsabre-sparring hoverdroids to be upgraded

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Unhappy

Small Beginnings

"...be able to pass power to one another ..."

After the feeding cycle, comes the breeding cycle. This is all a big mistake.

Rogue admin waits for verdict

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Unhappy

a good point

They would have sued his estate for damages. (Not a joke).

'al-Qaeda suicide cat' sends US Iraq war robots out of control

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Happy

Ahhhh, long term operational considerations

Our automated lethality delivery system has passed all functional requirements and environmental specification testing. Now we are confident that nothing can go wrong.

Microsoft wants pacemaker password tattoos

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Stop

General Specifications Are Good

By specifying the 'leftmost' foot, this ensures that people with any number of feet can be dealt with under standard procedures and leads to simpler development of procedures and processes.

Otherwise, people with one foot, or three, four, etc feet would have to be dealt with as an exception. In an emergency, you don't want physicians and para-medics having to make up new procedures on the fly because that would be prone to error.

However (as some of you will have noticed), this does not deal with the case where a patient has no feet. In order to deal with this case, the definition of the word 'foot/feet' must be clarified or replaced and agreed by all. I would suggest "The leftmost lower extremity of the body".

School secretly snapped 1000s of students at home

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Coat

Pictures, or it didn't happen

ok, ok, I'm leaving.

Google Chrome OS to route print jobs around planet

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Stop

No incrment in mining opportunity?

"...I suppose it's more data for mining."

If they're already running the apps with your documents and images being stored and worked on, then print routing does not represent an increase in data for mining. Or have I missed some aspect of this?

Police cuff 70 eBay fraud suspects

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Don't be cynical

I've got a WW2 Lancaster bomber for sale on e-bay. It's parked on the moon so it's 'buyer collect'. Are you interested? Bidding is up to £2500 so far and the auction ends on Friday, so hurry.

Frisco fanboi frenzy on 'iPad Day'

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Headmaster

@Humpty Dumpty re. 'proper person'

A good dictionary will give at least 15 meanings/uses of the adjective 'proper'. What's yours?

DIMENSIONAL PORTAL INCURSION AT THE LHC!

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re. special blade

Would that be the 'subtle knife' ?

Kit attacks Microsoft keyboards (and a whole lot more)

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Curly Capability

I can sell you some special USB controller cards that are capable of sending and receiving USB 2.0 through 2 metres of curly cable. Get in touch to discuss quantity and prices.

Apple's iPad to launch with 30,000-volume free library

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Big Brother

1984 and all that

Even more interesting/amusing; after the Kindle/'1984' fiasco, I found out that '1984' is out of copyright in Australia. So I went to Gutenberg's Australian server, downloaded a copy from there and read it on my Sony PRs-505. Go for the .txt file every time and format it up as you like using Calibre (it's free).

Apparently, my actions in doing this are 'illegal'; or am I 'only' liable to a civil action by the UK copyright holders? It's all very confusing.

Roger Boyes probes Vienna Boys’ Choir

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A Simple Question

I was impressed by the simple question just under the online masthead: "Where Am I?"

It seems so appropriate.

Don't blame Willy the Mailboy for software security flaws

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Analyse This

"...the software shall not contain any code that does not support a software requirement AND weakens the security of the application..."

I think the 'AND' should be 'OR'. As originally written, a 'coder' could put an easter egg in the application as long as it didn't weaken the security.

The sentence would also benefit from a few brackets to make things clearer. If they can't get the basic requirement written properly then what hope is there?

FBI cyber cop says 'very existence' of US under threat

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Existential Threats

I suggest reading Kierkegaard and Nietzsche to get an understanding of these problems.

EU approves on-board GSM for cruisers

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Stay Below Decks - Why?

Why do users have to stay below decks when within 12nm of the shore? Is it something to do with making sure their mobile phone doesn't log into a land based network?

Will ferry and cruiser security staff be patrolling the decks when the vessel gets within 12nm to make sure no sneaky, cheapskate passengers/crew are making 'cheap' calls by using any accessible land based networks as they approach the shore?

Energizer site still plagued by data-stealing trojan

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Half an Idea

non-stop Energiser Bunny...

everlasting Rampant Rabbit....

backdoor Trojan......

prophylactic measures needed......

Can somebody arrange/extend those bullet points into a witty/smutty comment because it's too early for me to manage that. Thank you.

Dell bars Win 7 refunds from Linux lovers

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Happy

Not Jesus

"Jesus Christ"

No. It's the Borg.

Jobcentre ejects Jedi Knight

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@pctechxp

Would that be the sort of 'mental help' that comes from other Jedi meditating and sending their strength to him via the medium of The Force?

Female porn director turned pol grabs Kent by the ballots

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British Board of Foolish Censors

"...the BBFC, who both claimed that there was no such thing as female ejaculation (they say its really urination) and that if it exists it's obscene anyway."

(Makes harumphing noises....) I don't know much about sex but I know what I don't like !

Mozilla births first Thunderbird 3.1 beta

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Exchange Killer ?

Thunderbird will access LDAP servers (according to the appropriate page in its Options), but I've never tried that so can't comment on it.

Thunderbird is an e-mail client, not an e-mail server, hence it could not be an 'Exchange Killer' but may be an 'Outlook Killer' in the right circumstances.

I've used Thunderbird/Lightning (2.0.23) on all my PCs to replace Outlook and am quite happy with it so far, but it does seem slow to draw pages (when switching from Mail view to Calendar view for example). However, this may be because I store the mail and calendars on my home network NAS box, which is not the fastest NAS box around.

Mutated genetic supertrout developed in lab

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Stop

I'm not geting involved.........

...........in this childish name calling contest.

BBC might pay for Tory broadband promises

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Happy

"...Funding needed, & soon,"

I misread that :)

Virgin signals start of telegraph pole broadband test

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@ Zeke

..Because the 13th floor is the most unlucky floor to jump from?

Tories on cyber war: Waffle, mutter, waffle. Um, vote for us!

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@John 211

Are you Peter 212's cousin?

Japanese phone boasts killer slacker-sensing app

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Happy

Let the predictable jokes begin.......

...oh, .....they already have.

Mozilla open source license set for facelift

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Gates Horns

Let the nightmare begin.

"Code licensed under the current MPL can be copied and modified as long as it's then redistributed under the MPL, .."

I believe that this statement is not correct. Please bear with me as I rewrite it........

'Code licensed under the current MPL can be copied and modified and then, _IF_ it is redistributed, must be redistributed under the MPL'.

Lawyers jump onto subtle things like that and sink their teeth in deep and hard.

(I'm sure that Cade does know this and that internally he had a conditional assumption in his mind when he wrote that. However, he didn't write the condition down......lawyer food! )

A question for you all :- What does the word 'redistributed' mean? You know what it means and I know what it means, but how do we know that we both mean exactly the same thing by that word?

I can think of many graded examples which open up arguments about the word 'redistributed' but I won't set them out here.

I think that many large (and small) companies avoid 'Open Source' because of the potential legal minefield caused by interpretation of wording of the various licenses. It's easier to sup with the devil.

Anti-binge drinking ads add to binge drinking

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Malign Influence

I once stole a policeman's helmet, then did a dump in it. I blame the malign influence of television.

Forget SETI, this is how you find aliens: Hefty prof speaks

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Start Small At First

I think a 'ringworld' would be much easier to build at first (and very much easier to get planning permission for). Then you could get the builders in, to make extensions on the edges and so work your way towards a Dyson sphere.

If the extensions were small enough, you wouldn't need planning permission for each one and so you could sneak your way to having a Dyson sphere over a long period of time.

Climategate hits Westminster: MPs spring a surprise

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Par For The Course

".....Graham Stringer BSc, an analytical chemist and the only scientist on the MPs' committee."

This does not surprise me at all.

Secret documents: The Truth about MoD's UFO files

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troll dessert.....

They've been doing that for years!

Gay site says bank shut account over 'objectionable' blog

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Hey jake - TV Is A Great Educator

I'm preparing for my holiday in the USA by watching episodes of 'The Beverley Hillbillies' and 'Happy Days'. I want to understand the socio-political mindset of the American people before I go there.

US government rescinds 'leave internet alone' policy

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The Intellectual Giants Are Gathering

"that was then and this is now..."

You can't beat a well considered and thoughtfully presented argument.

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