* Posts by frank ly

6112 posts • joined 10 Jun 2009

Phone-hack backlash BBC in embarrassing headline gaffes

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Try ...

... littered with exactly the same 'gotchas'.

Ex–News International boss Brooks denies bribing cops

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Happy

I upvoted you for imagination and effort ...

.... but it needs some rewriting (and spell-checking and a bit more punctuation). Well done though :)

When it's all over, I have a feeling that the box will be filled with clear blue water. :(

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WTF?

Who sets the rules here?

"Murdoch said he couldn't comment on the possibility of editors not knowing about phone-hacking methods taking place at the newspaper, given the ongoing police investigations."

So, Rupert Murdoch (or his legal adviser) decides that he can't give answers to certain questions, to a parliamentary hearing, because it would affect police operations. Does the chairman of the hearing or the police themselves have any opinion on this matter, or do they just keep quiet and let him run the show? Oh.... a silly question I suppose.

DARPA project seeks immortality, suspended animation

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Happy

Perhaps....

.. but only for you. The rest of us will find it very amusing and will call you Captain Slowborg.

Hacked Sun site greatly exaggerates Murdoch's death

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Happy

Early Critical Commentary

On a lighter but related note: Have a listen to (by purchasing it), the 1994 'Happiness' album, by Roger Taylor (was the Queen drummer). It has a track called 'Dear Mr Murdoch'; which gave me lulz.

Captain Kirk's Google+ account gets zapped

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Coat

I hope I'm the first to say.....

...To boldly google+ where no man has google+d before.

(Yes, I see where that went wrong. I'm going)

Acer flings forth SSD-booting, HDD-data-storing laptop

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Meh

re.Boot Cycling

I always Hibernate my laptop to give me a faster startup time, but an SSD would improve this of course. (I do a full re-boot every now and then to clear out any crud that may have built up, or after those updates that demand a Restart).

Rebekah Brooks quits - Murdoch accepts this time

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Happy

In the interests of journalistic integrity.......

... I should point out that his name is (apparently) Mockridge.

Hundreds of dot-brand domains predicted

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Happy

Ah, dictionaries......

"Also, if somebody has a brand that is a dictionary word, there's a risk."

Such as 'coke' or 'apple' perhaps?

Online map suppressing crime reporting, says survey

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Coat

As they say.....

If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear. Oh... wait a minute.

.XXX to launch nothing-but-smut unsafe search

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Coat

I was wondering....

.. Is there a Club for people with such Wicked interests?

(ok.. coat on...going)

ESA unveils billion pixel camera that will map the Milky Way

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@SkippyBing

It looks like Thoguht with his 'Gigapixel?' post answered that one. I'm still surprised that there would be enough separation.

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Stereo View Of The Stars?

If you want a 3D image of stars, don't your 'eyes' have to be very, very far apart? If the two imaging arrays are set at 106.5 degrees to each other, aren't they then looking in very different directions?

Can the El Reg hive mind shed any (star) light on this please?

Boffins build nanowire lasers from nappy-rash cream

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Pint

An outreach programme is needed

"change its function from a bad cell to a good cell."

They need to go out and have a few beers with the international cellular pathology research community, to expand their vocabulary in this area.

Pissed-off elves bombard Icelandic town with rocks

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@AC 12:04

It depends on which system of logic you use and your personal beliefs. Yours are not the only ones.

Terrafugia flying car gets road-safety exemptions

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@Marvin

Don't you mean 100HP per litre?

Pharmacy spam disguised as Google+ invites

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re. Cock Like a Rock

Irregularly shaped with a rough and pock-marked surface? No thank you, I already have one.

Glasgow cammer not thrown in slammer

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In which case....

.. are the cinema owners/management making a fraudulent statement?

Does any of the Mandybill legislation cover this or was it passed full of holes you could drive a bus through?

Canada buys Obama's reject Brit choppers for spare parts

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Flame

What is it about VIPs....

,.. that they need special seats and special toilets? I'm really wondering.

Moderatrix kisses the Reg goodbye

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Perhaps it's 'Judith'

Or Judicious... we will find out soon (if we are permitted).

Good luck Miss Bee, my best wishes for your future.

German vulture detective hits turbulence

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Coat

And...

the collective noun for pelicans should be a 'crossing'.

Coat...on...leaving.

Teenager tries to trade virginity for iPhone

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Sits back...

.. and watches the tumbleweed roll by.

Blow to the head makes people feel good about religion

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@ all of the above

@AC 13:50 You make a good point. It seems that religion makes people feel better about a blow to the head.

@AC 14:44 You are actually agreeing with him! (based on your first paragraph

@Bristol: You need to differentiate between ACs

@Zeke: You've started drinking early you old dog ;) Does beer make you feel better about a blow to the head?

US Supremes to hear warrantless GPS tracking case

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Maybe, but...

... some citizens are more equal than others.

Travelodge admits hack

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Why store credit card data?

Why do suppliers store customer credit card data?? Only the credit card companies should have any credit card details stored.

Samsung names date for UK 10in Android tablet release

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Happy

Maybe...

... It's their way of saying 'pre-n'?

Harry Potter Web-2.0 'Pottermore' offering unveiled

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It depends how you do it...

Hermione was in such a hurry to tell Harry the news that she didn't pause to knock as she opened the door to his room. She staggered to a halt at the sight of Harry kneeling on the floor and polishing his wand with furious vigour.

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Meh

Use your head ...

... and a disposable e-mail address and a pre-paid credit card with £50 max on it.

Women's gaydar (for men) improves when ovulating

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Stop

I found that text !

In e-book form! No, I'm not saying where it is.

WTF are... connected appliances?

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@heyrick

"... If I think it is too light for me, I fold the towel in half and drop it over my head."

Have you patented that? You should!

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Even worse.....

... they might have turned .... vegetarian!

Comet in bad way after big losses

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Fix...

" ... treat your customer to an endless supply..."

Programmers urged to code with their tootsies

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Thumb Up

Great for disabled people with limited hand/arm use

The problem is in getting the volume orders to enable low sale-price production (always has been). After that, there is the problem of setting up, etc, which would need a technically competent assistant for a short while.

This and similar devices have been 'possible' for many years but there is little incentive for volume manufacture.

For a disabled person using their feet, a foot operated trackball would seem to be a good idea, perhaps with more friction than the usual hand operated trackballs.

Oz alkie gets hammered on hospital hand sanitiser

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Use vile tasting additives

Such as 'bittrex', as painted on nails to stop people biting them.

Note: They have this in my local surgery waiting room. I'll give it a try next time I'm in there, just to see what it's like.

Bitcoin collapses on malicious trade

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Blue is an appropriate colour here

I've never seen this kind of diagram before. Am I right to assume that the diameter of each circle represents the total volume of trades? If so, does the number of concentric circles from a point represent the number of individual trades or is the stepped blue gradient just to help you find the centre of the circle?

As for one large sell trade driving the value down so quickly; surely that would only happen if a significant number of people were using automated trading systems, with panicky algorithms?

Does a flash motor make a man more desirable?

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Coat

How about "..a thong of ladies" ?

Just asking... on my way...

'Spongiforma squarepantsii' lifeform found in Borneo

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But, But...

It's not rectangular!

NHS trust issues nurse jub flash alert

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Scrunchie - Dual use item

"The policy on scrunchies is not noted."

The policy on scrunchies is to have them as required items of adornment.

This is because a scrunchie can be used as a tourniquet in emergencies and for everyday use when binding the upper arm to take blood samples from the lower arm. All part of cost saving measures.

Lulz warns NHS of sick security

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The Fools!

That link ... http://lulzsecurity.com

All the authorities need to do is track down the registered owner of that domain and they can capture the evil mastermind who is responsible for the worldwide computer carnage.

Council fined for randomly emailing personal data

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Not quite Correct

" ... the council had paid the price for failing to handle sensitive data appropriately ..."

Actually, Surrey ratepayers (poll tax..) will pay the price, in reduced spending on services or an increase in their payments next year.

I'd like to see fines of this nature levied on executive salaries/bonuses and managerial bonuses, over a three (or so) year period. Yes, dream on, I know.

Has Steve Jobs killed the consumer hard disk industry?

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Happy

Dropbox....

2GB of cloudy storage for free, synced to all your local computing devices and it has a 'Public' folder, from which you can give links to people for individual files. Apply your own encryption for confidential stuff, obviously.

3D-printed bikini goes on sale

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Stop

A Better Idea...

Get a can (or two) of silly string and spray a mesh bikini on her, It would be guaranteed to fit perfectly and would be the ultimate in limited-edition fashion items.

Two fat atoms get the nod

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A relevant question:

Were you standing in a zinc bucket full of pigshit when you took that picture?

We have a right to know! (Actually, we don't. I'm just saying stuff.)

Boffins develop working MALE PILL

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Stop

@oddie

Never, ever, use an old condom!

Sandi Toksvig puts the 'n' into cuts - on the Beeb

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Happy

You mean......

Typical response from a cut who ......

(They like to think they're a cut above the rest of us but really their all cut from the same cloth. That's enough cutting wit for now.)

Aussie vendor pledges to ship 'first' Chrome laptop this week

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When will El Reg review it?

See title.

Beeb's iPlayer dismisses radio show as 'b011ckxs'

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Happy

That dog...

.. looks cute and funny at the same time. (So does the little canine creature.)

Facebook under fire over Israel, transgender bullying

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This is a tit.....

In Facebookland, breasts are obscene and it is harmful for young children to see them.

WW2 naval dazzle-camo 'could beat Taliban RPGs'

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Coat

Did You...

identify her as a viable target and were you tempted to deploy your torpedo?

(I'm going, I'm going.)

Verity Stob and the super subjunction

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Headmaster

Ponderingly ...

" ... which aimed to differentiate better between .."

I have a feeling that this should be ' ... which aimed to better differentiate between ... '

(It's arguable, I know.)

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