* Posts by Shaha Alam

235 posts • joined 2 Jun 2009

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Munich council: To hell with Linux, we're going full Windows in 2020

Shaha Alam

something, something, something, dark side.

something, something, something, complete.

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Better filters won't cure this: YouTube's kids nightmare

Shaha Alam

i dont get how any of this makes money.

who's clicking the ads? are they buying something? which companies are paying for ads where no customer clicks through? who would bother producing shit content when no advertiser is willing to advertise because no customers click through?

which advertising platform would survive if advertisers decided their adverts were being pointlessly shown to minors who have no potential to click through and 'convert' into a customer?

am i missing something here?

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Bad news! Astroboffins find the stuff of life in space for the first time

Shaha Alam

i'm not saying it's aliens...

...but turns out it's not aliens.

<Giorgio Tsoukalos sad face.>

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Forget the 'simulated universe', say boffins, no simulator could hit the required scale

Shaha Alam

if we're going to assume a computational simulator...

why not assume it's a very big computational simulator? it might even be a hypervisor simulator with more than one simulation running at the same time.

seems like the problem here is lack of imagination.

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Australia commits to establish space agency with no budget, plan, name, deadline …

Shaha Alam

the RFP's went out for a super-catapult.

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Don't panic, but.. ALIEN galaxies are slamming Earth with ultra-high-energy cosmic rays

Shaha Alam

bloody foreign cosmic particles. comin' over to this galaxy, messing around with our isotopes.

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UK PC prices have risen 30% in a year since the EU referendum

Shaha Alam
Trollface

Re: @UncleNick

remember the mantra: Reduce, reuse, recycle? brexit leads to loss in the value of the pound, which leads to less consumerism, which leads to reduction in consumption, which leads to reduction in greenhouse gasses which leads to reduction in global warming.

who knew noble brexiteers would turn out to be superheros saving the world?

flying capes and amazon vouchers all round folks,

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What's your flava? Ooo, tell me what's your flava... of Ubuntu

Shaha Alam

no, but you might be a kdefiddler

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Chrome web dev plugin with 1m+ users hijacked, crams ads into browsers

Shaha Alam

"I stupidly fell for a phishing attack on my Google account"

it happens, lad, it happens.

IT systems should never expect users to be infallible. quite the opposite. user's lose keys, forget birth dates, run out of phone battery, get pick pocketed. any security process needs to compensate for the every day personal misfortunes and mistakes. that means key revocation processes, priority lines for reporting losses, alternative ways of accessing services, 'lite' services that can be offered where the full-fat version would require a higher level of clearance. etc.

people arent computers. we should stop building processes that behave as if they are.

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'Real' people want govts to spy on them, argues UK Home Secretary

Shaha Alam

Re: "The only country that is Up Shit Creek *with* a Rudder."

but anvils sound terrible. even after tuning.

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Two-factor FAIL: Chap gets pwned after 'AT&T falls for hacker tricks'

Shaha Alam

Re: Any other luddites about?

what you use your phone for is irrelevant.

as long as your service providers allow the use of a phone number to secure your account, you're vulnerable - even if you dont even have a phone.

what's a self professed luddite doing on a tech website anyway?

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NHS WannaCrypt postmortem: Outbreak blamed on lack of accountability

Shaha Alam

what, the gajillions spent on internal rebranding exercises didnt help?

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Facebook fake news: Sort it out yourself, readers

Shaha Alam

its just easier to accept we're all heading for an idiocracy, a government of the stupid, by the stupid, for the stupid. if we're not there already.

with any luck, the smart people will just take their ball and fuck off elsewhere, leaving the rest of us to stew in our own stupidity.

that's if any of them actually played ball games. which we know they dont.

so in conclusion, have another sip of your victory gin.

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Wi-Fi sex toy with built-in camera fails penetration test

Shaha Alam

you might thing 'Pen Test Partners' is a sexy place to work.

just wait till they help you sort your bic's from your biro's.

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FBI boss: 'Memories are not absolutely private in America'

Shaha Alam

<obligatory 1984 reference>

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US Marines seek a few supposedly good men ... who leaked naked pics of a few good women

Shaha Alam

Re: Different hats

" I haven't quite managed to cast off the old-fashioned opinion that men and women are not physically and psychologically identical."

with respect to the question and headwear in general, you can consider them to be physiologically identical.

as in, there's no physiological reason the hats should be different. psychological... well only if you want everyone to know that this is a woman and this is a man and they must not wear the same head gear because of ${REASONS}.

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Shaha Alam

"...where there was no shame felt by what they got up to, until people started getting caught out when they went too far."

i wonder how far this describes the attitude towards 'enemy combatants'... let alone innocent bystanders.

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Planned Espionage Act could jail journos and whistleblowers as spies

Shaha Alam

<obligatory 1984 quote>

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Who's behind the Kodi TV streaming stick crackdown?

Shaha Alam
Joke

"...and the unlicensed streaming services even have a slick EPG (TV guide)"

how dare they, the bastards!

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Big Tech files anti-Trump brief: Immigration ban illegal and damaging to business

Shaha Alam

Re: ...

"Some caution on folks arriving from there would seem reasonable."

if you're going to be making your argument on the basis of risk/safety, please note that on the whole, the risk profile of allowing people in from those countries using existing processes is less than american citizens face from other citizens going on shooting rampages. that's even if you include the unstable nature of those countries in you risk calculations.

this argument exists in the absence of common sense and independently verifiable data.

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Mumsnet ordered to give users' real life IDs and messages to plastic surgeon they criticised

Shaha Alam
Trollface

all websites should inject "in my opinion" in front of all user's posts and end them with "allegedly".

fix'd.

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Amazon files patent for 'Death Star' flying warehouse

Shaha Alam

how do the drones get back to the mothership?

i suggest making the drones edible, as yummy low-calorie treats. it would solve the problem.

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Trumping free trade: Say 'King of Bankruptcy' Ross does end up in charge of US commerce

Shaha Alam

Re: wholeheartedly agree

I think their criticism about inequality is mainly that the system, as it is, pushes wealth upwards. so whilst globally more people have improved their circumstances, more and more wealth is still moving upwards - and at a faster rate.

if you follow the trend, this means that those who managed to climb out of poverty will start sinking back into it. much as how citizens in western countries are now less well off than their parents generation, for example.

i'm not saying that rich shouldnt be rich or that they should give wealth to the poor. the point is that we need to fix a system where that gap seems to only get wider and wider. eventually we went even be having this discussion in terms of relative wealth, but in terms of absolutes, ie the 'haves' and the 'have nots'. some people will simply own *everything* and everyone else will own nothing. that the 'have nots' dont die off of hunger will be dependent on the generosity and benevolence of the 'haves'. democracy will cease to function (given the power of the wealthy to effect democratic outcomes suggests we're not far off) and the gulf between the two worlds will be so vast it will be difficult to describe the two groups as sharing any semblance of humanity (other than a genome)

its a mathematical certainty, if wealth continues to accrue in fewer and fewer hands,

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Shaha Alam

Re: Same idiocy regardless of location

"To make this a reality would take an overarching 15-20 year plan to gradually pull back production from international factories."

that's fine because trump was expecting to stay in power for a lot more than 4 or 8 years.

now, what circumstances are needed to galvanise the republic into granting him emergency powers to exceed his mandate as president, well, i think we all know what form of public persuasion that takes...

next step, the reordering of the republic into the First Amerikan Empire.

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Valley techies to protest outside Palantir – Trump adviser's creepy citizen database biz

Shaha Alam

its true that people deserve the leaders they get.

reading some of these comments, i'm not surprised trump was elected. there seems to be little concern that a system is being proposed to identify free, innocent citizens on the basis of their faith, and keep track of them, in a way separate from the rest of the citizenry.

if that doesn't worry you then good luck to you, I say. Good luck to all of us.

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Boffins link ALIEN STRUCTURE ON VENUS to Solar System's biggest ever grav wave

Shaha Alam

i'm not saying it's aliens...

but it's aliens.

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Chelsea Manning sentence slashed by Prez Obama: She'll be sprung in the spring

Shaha Alam

Re: One way only

Kodos? that tax avoiding, green faced, froomuublub grabber? no thanks!

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Windows 10 memory management changes to give Hyper-V more headroom

Shaha Alam

Re: Hmm...

depends, is it more efficient to grab 100k of memory and gradually fill it as needed or keep making requests for more memory and accepting the overhead each time?

it really does depend on the application and use case. application optimisation usually results in some tradeoffs.

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Brilliant phishing attack probes sent mail, sends fake attachments

Shaha Alam

any document with 'strategy' in the title should be immediately deleted to avoid frustration and mental anguish.

now, what's all this talk about exploits in dodgy attachments?

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Anti-smut law dubs PCs, phones 'pornographic vendor machines', demands internet filters

Shaha Alam
Coffee/keyboard

this is about protecting the mental, emotional and psychological welfare of our children. you can't put a price on that!

well, turns out you can, it's 20 bucks.

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New Windows 10 privacy controls: Just a little snooping – or the max

Shaha Alam

"We are continuing this commitment to make it as easy as possible for you to make informed choices about your privacy with Windows 10..."

it's not so much the "informed" that was missing, but the absence of actual "choice" that was problem.

as in, "no sharing of data" wasnt an option anywhere and still wont be.

whilst its nice to be informed about which tool i can choose to be shafted with, i'd much prefer not to be shafted in the first place.

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Major maser microwaves Hubble

Shaha Alam

how do we know they're merging?

they could just be awkwardly sliding past each other trying not to make eye contact.

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'Upset' Linus Torvalds gets sweary and gets results

Shaha Alam

is it true they checked in code that didnt compile?

that should be treated as malicious activity.

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Is your Windows 10, 8 PC falling off the 'net? Microsoft doesn't care

Shaha Alam

" Holding down shift before and during a shutdown forces a clean restart and may clear the problem."

any restart should be a 'clean' restart. if restarting has a chance of carrying forward the same shit that was there previously, it's not really a 'restart' is it?

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The UK's Investigatory Powers Act allows the State to tell lies in court

Shaha Alam
Coffee/keyboard

what a lovely Orwellian pickle we seem to have found ourselves in.

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Blu Vivo 6: Top value trendsetter marred by Chino-English mangle

Shaha Alam

"Operating the suspend button, achieved to return, sleep and so on,"

what's wrong with that? sounds perfectly cromulant to me.

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100k+ petition: MPs must consider debating Snoopers' Charter again

Shaha Alam

"...Jim Killock, commented that Brexit had distracted politicians and the public from examining the bill..."

feckless politicians. cant multitask.

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How-to terror manuals still being sold by Apple, Amazon, Waterstones

Shaha Alam

would hardened ne'er-do-wells be buying this stuff from such well known places? or exchanging info freely on the dark/deep web?

they should probably keep those books on sale. i doubt they put anyone at risk other than contestants for the darwin award.

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Ghost of DEC Alpha is why Windows is rubbish at file compression

Shaha Alam

Re: Obvious bull

hard disks were a lot smaller back then so some sacrifices had to be made for the sake of practicality.

there were already complaints about bloat in windows.

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Drone idiots are still endangering real aircraft and breaking the rules

Shaha Alam
Alien

drones you say?

they're drones alright...

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Social media flame wars to be illegal, says top Crown prosecutor

Shaha Alam

but i was only joking!

who'd have thought the troll's copout turns out to be an actual viable defense?

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‘Andromeda’ will be Google’s Windows NT

Shaha Alam

Re: Curtains for Windows

Windows is already in terminal self-deprecation mode.

though it's an activity unrelated to the development of android or chrome OS.

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Lenovo exec: Nope, not building Windows Phones

Shaha Alam

"Lenovo has contacted the Reg to say that it has no comment.."

'hello? yes, it's Micky Tightlips. From Lenovo. i aint sayin nuffink.'

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Violence, vandals and vomit: London's naughtiest tech Tube stations revealed

Shaha Alam

"...and another rebel without a cause dared to stand too close to the edge of the platform."

oh they had a cause. cleaning the gene pool.

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Bee queens are Notch-blocking their minions, say boffins

Shaha Alam

"The fertility rating was scored on a number from zero to three. Zero indicated inactive reproductive activity in the ovaries, whilst three was for ovaries that contained fully developed eggs."

worst profile on dating site ever.

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Fun fact of the day: Network routers are illegal in Japan

Shaha Alam

Ohayou Gozaimasu!

please can you connect my internet wire to the google server please? I'll do a quick search and then you can connect the wire to the server i'm looking for.

domo arigatou

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Samsung Note 7: Probably the best phone in the world. Yeah – you heard right

Shaha Alam

Re: Still doesn't have front facing speakers..

he never claimed it to be the 'most important' feature so your arsey sarcasm is misplaced.

given the common use of these devices as video players (and anyone who's used the htc m7 knows how great front facing speakers can be), yes, having decent speakers on the front is actually a really important requirement on a device of this type.

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Study of asexually reproducing honeybee ponders: But why the mass murder?

Shaha Alam

can anyone join their Marxist utopia or is it an exclusive club?

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Microsoft to buy LinkedIn

Shaha Alam

hooray! cocaine and hookers all round, folks!

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