* Posts by Captain Hogwash

824 posts • joined 23 Feb 2009


If most punters are unlikely to pay more for 5G, why all the rush?

Captain Hogwash

Re: I can't even have a mobile-connected smart meter

The words cloud, silver and lining immediately spring to mind.

Privacy, security fears about ID cards? UK.gov's digital bod has one simple solution: 'Get over it'

Captain Hogwash

Re: people were perfectly happy handing over their data to tech giants

Yes, and of course we're all the same aren't we?

Captain Hogwash

Re: Your implication that non-plebs don't die?

I would imagine that the implication is that only plebs die as a result of cuts to a service used only by plebs. TPTB are rich enough to go private and that is what they do.

Captain Hogwash

“Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty; power is ever stealing from the many to the few. The manna of popular liberty must be gathered each day or it is rotten. The living sap of today outgrows the dead rind of yesterday. The hand entrusted with power becomes, either from human depravity or esprit de corps, the necessary enemy of the people. Only by continued oversight can the democrat in office be prevented from hardening into a despot; only by unintermitted agitation can a people be sufficiently awake to principle not to let liberty be smothered in material prosperity.”

-Wendell Phillips, January 28, 1852


Politicians, like nappies, should be changed frequently and for the same reason.

Google: I don't know why you say Allo, I say goodbye

Captain Hogwash

Re: encourage friends to start using Signal Messenger

Oh if only they were susceptible to encouragement.

Peak tech! Bacon vending machine signals apex of human invention

Captain Hogwash

Re: achingly hip

Vegan eh?

Total Inability To Support User Phones: O2 fries, burning data for 32 million Brits

Captain Hogwash

In unrelated news....


UK spies: You know how we said bulk device hacking would be used sparingly? Well, things have 'evolved'...

Captain Hogwash
Black Helicopters

Equipment interference

Beginning at O2?

After all that! Ofcom proposes BT as only broadband universal services provider for whole of UK (except Hull)

Captain Hogwash

Re: Independent how?

I understand the first bit but why would you want diarrhoea?

Shocker: UK smart meter rollout is crap, late and £500m over budget

Captain Hogwash

Re: Smart meters do not save energy

The primary benefit to the supplier is the ability to introduce Uber-style surge pricing.

Cheeky cheesemaker fails to copyright how things taste

Captain Hogwash

Re: non-dairy (sheep, goats) cheese

See https://www.dictionary.com/browse/dairy

Guess who's back, back again? China's back, hacking your friends: Beijing targets American biz amid tech tariff tiff

Captain Hogwash

Yes, patients often expire when subjected to a bullet or a big bang.

Stairway to edam: Swiss bloke blasts roquefort his cheese, thinks Led Zep might make it tastier

Captain Hogwash

Re: roll through Gloucester twice

Make sure to chase it down Cooper's Hill.

Captain Hogwash

While My Gruyere Gently Weeps - The Beatles

The Advent Of Paneer - Gentle Giant

East Of Edam - Dead Can Dance

Musica Emmental - Dead Can Dance

Captain Hogwash

Do you suppose...

...he's hoping to produce some tubular Babybels?

Captain Hogwash

Gong's Camembert Electrique album surely?

Or maybe Hawkwind's Quark, Strangeness and Charm.

Planet Computers straps proper phone to its next Psion scion, Cosmo

Captain Hogwash

You'll need big pockets

...since the Cosmo is no small piece.

Swedes grumbling about Apple Store in their park are lucky – in Toronto, Google eats all your data

Captain Hogwash

Re: Maybe a better design would be...


"a modern-day town square, where everyone is welcome in a space where the best of Apple comes together to connect with one another, discover a new passion, or take their skill to the next level,"

The question is, will this square have rounded corners?

Chuck this on expenses: £2k iPad paints Apple as the premium fondleslab specialist – as planned

Captain Hogwash

Re: Nobody is forcing you to buy a fully specced one.

I rather hope nobody is forcing me to buy any one.

Budget 2018: Landlords could be forced to grant access for full-fibre connections

Captain Hogwash

Re: Force landlords?

Where is the rent?

I must have the rent!

Dollars, dimes and nickels,

I need them all right now!

All through the house, not a creature was stirring... especially Samsung smartwatches: Batteries empty at 3AM

Captain Hogwash

Re: S9 has a locked bootloader so flashing the device with...Lineage is out of the question

Are you sure?


Maybe you have a network variant model.

Samsung Galaxy A9: Mid-range bruiser that takes the fight to Huawei

Captain Hogwash

Re: How did you do the upgrade?

Instructions here: https://wiki.lineageos.org/devices/i9300/install

Captain Hogwash

Re: GT-i9300

Mine runs pretty well on Android 7.1 (although not as well as my S5 on 8.1.) The trick is to get rid of all the Google & Samsung crap.

Ding ding! Round Two: Second annual review for transatlantic data flow deal Privacy Shield

Captain Hogwash


When did we start using reticence in place of reluctance? (See also refute vs reject.)

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave me tea... pigs-in-blankets-flavoured tea

Captain Hogwash

Re: can't get a rizla paper between them

Well I don't know what the downvotes are about, but where I live Tesco is a lot cheaper than Waitrose.

Captain Hogwash

Re: Christmas tree ... unutterably disgusting

I agree. The Toilet Duck flavour is much better.

Captain Hogwash

Re: can't get a rizla paper between them

Really? I don't know much about Morrisons, but Tesco & Waitrose? You must be as rich as Croesus.

A web where the user has complete control of their data? Sounds Solid, Tim Berners-Lee

Captain Hogwash

Re: who do you want to be your data overlords?

You can self-host. I think the odds are against it for reasons stated by other commenters, but I hope it succeeds. BTW, did I mention you can self-host?

Captain Hogwash

Re: Good Luck

You're right. It will probably work too. For example, I explained Tor to my SO the other night. Her first words after were "I bet paedophiles use that." She conceded that the legitimate uses I suggested were valid, but it just shows where the minds of those who rarely, if ever, think about this stuff go to first.

Location, location, location... technologies under the microscope

Captain Hogwash

It was Ireland's biggest lingerie department I understand.

Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

Captain Hogwash

Re: never seems to taste the same?

Hard vs soft water.

Open-source alt-droid wants to know if it's still leaking data to Google

Captain Hogwash

Re: Difficult to see that appealing to manufacturers

It depends on the size of the market which can be demonstrated. That's the point of the cloud services. If it looks big enough, some will bite.

Captain Hogwash

Re: extensive hardware

I think the idea is to demonstrate viability to hardware manufacturers by building out the cloud services first and attract users who are comfortable with building and/or installing custom ROMs. If take up is sufficient to convince device makers to do some small-ish production runs then the hope might be that desire for a Google & Apple free smartphone is widespread enough that those runs are repeated in greater numbers. It's going to be an uphill struggle for sure. But I think it's worth supporting as, although I'm a long time CM/LOS user, I've never been able to convince otherwise interested Android users to void their manufacturers warranties.

Captain Hogwash

Re: Why?

Read the conversation in comments here:


UK.gov's no-deal plans leave HMRC customs, VAT systems scrambling to keep up

Captain Hogwash

Re: the department felt it had been acting lawfully

Feelings are irrelevant, especially so for a government department.

UK comms revenues reach all-time low of £54.7bn, as internet kills the TV star

Captain Hogwash

Re: superfast as a download speed exceeding 24 mbps

24 millibits per second? Blimey that is slow.

Captain Hogwash

Re: beating off Microsoft

Must have been difficult.

Think tank calls for post-Brexit national ID cards: The kids have phones so what's the difference?

Captain Hogwash

Re: they only care if you're old and white

Actually they only care if you're wealthy. Old and white are just preferences.

If you're serious about securing IoT gadgets, may as well start here

Captain Hogwash

Re: Tradition works - we're going back to vinyl

No sir. Tradition demands that you strike the Viol, touch the Lute, wake the Harp and inspire the Flute. Damn your vinyl to Hades, sir. It is nothing but a muck-spout. Aye sir and a fopdoodle.

Microsoft still longs to be a 'lifestyle' brand, but the cupboard looks bare

Captain Hogwash

Re: Microsoft risks becoming a Wang

And as any marketer knows, a name like Microsoft is never going to cut it as an aspirational brand.

What if tech moguls brewed real ale?

Captain Hogwash


Enjoyed with PIMs chasers and known to loosen up those geeks who refuse to engage in Smalltalk.

Captain Hogwash

Re: Apple cider

Apple don't make cider. They only make iPA.

As Corning unveils its latest Gorilla Glass, we ask: What happened to sapphire mobe screens?

Captain Hogwash

+1 for Breitling - 20 years on.

Why Google won't break a sweat about EU ruling

Captain Hogwash

Re: The Fuschia's so bright

I just discovered I have the spelling wrong. It should be Fuchsia. From what I remember about etymology and elementary German, the name likely derives from someone called Fuchs and would more correctly be pronounced fooks-ya. Appropriate, no? Google are way ahead on their evil game plan, unfortunately.

Captain Hogwash

The Fuschia's so bright

...I gotta wear shades.

Ah, British summer. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the internet is on the fritz

Captain Hogwash

Re: Japan?

Or Bangladesh?

Wearable hybrids prove the bloated smartwatch is one of Silly Valley's biggest mistakes

Captain Hogwash

Re: Taking a pencil with me is an unconscionable extravagance!

Do you favour a spike over a chair?

Captain Hogwash

Re: I use web app based software

No mobile signal in our local Tesco. Local app or pen & paper also have reduced data slurpage risks (probably.) Still, nice ad comrade.

Adtech-for-sex biz tells blockchain consent app firm, 'hold my beer'

Captain Hogwash

Re: Buy flowers/chocolates

And they have the audacity to say men are simple creatures.

No, seriously, why are you holding your phone like that?

Captain Hogwash

Re: "get"


person: How are you?

twat: I'm good.

person: That should stand you in good stead if there turns out to be an afterlife.


Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018