* Posts by Captain Hogwash

839 posts • joined 23 Feb 2009


Not so smart after all: A techie's tale of toilet noise horror

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Re: Computer sound is on in an open space ?

BING? It might have been micro but I don't think it was soft at the time.

Return of the audio format wars and other money-making scams

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Re: baroque and roll

I should rococo!

Pandas so useless they just look at delicious kid who fell into enclosure

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Re: Basically a toss-up between the panda and the zebra


One click and you're out: UK makes it an offence to view terrorist propaganda even once

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Re: "Go straight to goal"

He shoots, he scores...oh, wait.


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Re: IQ <85

As soon as you get rid the first one the meaning of IQ < 85 changes. You'd have to get rid of everyone until there was just one left. The survivor's IQ, by definition, would be 100.

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Re: someone shopping for radishes

You mean radicals? (Some reading on etymology useful here.)

US kids apparently talking like Peppa Pig... How about US lawmakers watching Doctor Who?

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Re: "A simple way to cure the problem..."

It's a problem?

Mini computer flingers go after a slice of the high street retail Pi

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Re: Mini computer flingers

I've never been but it sounds like it's a PR1ME retail location.

Fujitsu pitched stalker-y AI that can read your social media posts as solution to Irish border, apparently

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Re: It doesn't leverage a single thing

Quite. And where's the synergy?

Senior slippery sex stimulator sales exec sacked for shafting .org-asmic cyber-space place, a tribunal hears

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Re: Well, still an idiot

Exactly. See trashbat.co.ck

Irish data watchdog to Facebook: Hang about, what's all this about a WhatsApp, Instagram, Messenger merger now?

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Re: thanks to my family I can't

Explain your objection and that you will be leaving WhatsApp. Tell them the means by which they will be able to contact you thereafter. Leave. Never allow yourself to be a hostage to other people's ignorance.

Straight outta Blighty: Readers, if you were a tech billionaire, what would you do?

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Re: If I were a tech billionaire...

Also because I know which plants & animals I can eat and which ones could kill me.

'Nun' drops goat head on pavement outside Cheltenham 'Spoons

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Re: presumptuous

I thought so too when it first opened. Having been in there once I'd be hard pressed to imagine it as anyone's ideal pub. Much better 'spoons in Stroud and Gloucester anyway if you're looking for something other than a proper pub.

Say GDP-aaaRrrgh, streamers: Max Schrems is coming for you, Netflix and Amazon

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Get their freak on?

I used to be a dull John Doe. Thanks to Huawei, I'm now James Bond!

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Re: It's not Facebook

Surely the manufacturers only do this because they are paid to by Facebook?

If most punters are unlikely to pay more for 5G, why all the rush?

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Re: I can't even have a mobile-connected smart meter

The words cloud, silver and lining immediately spring to mind.

Privacy, security fears about ID cards? UK.gov's digital bod has one simple solution: 'Get over it'

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Re: people were perfectly happy handing over their data to tech giants

Yes, and of course we're all the same aren't we?

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Re: Your implication that non-plebs don't die?

I would imagine that the implication is that only plebs die as a result of cuts to a service used only by plebs. TPTB are rich enough to go private and that is what they do.

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“Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty; power is ever stealing from the many to the few. The manna of popular liberty must be gathered each day or it is rotten. The living sap of today outgrows the dead rind of yesterday. The hand entrusted with power becomes, either from human depravity or esprit de corps, the necessary enemy of the people. Only by continued oversight can the democrat in office be prevented from hardening into a despot; only by unintermitted agitation can a people be sufficiently awake to principle not to let liberty be smothered in material prosperity.”

-Wendell Phillips, January 28, 1852


Politicians, like nappies, should be changed frequently and for the same reason.

Google: I don't know why you say Allo, I say goodbye

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Re: encourage friends to start using Signal Messenger

Oh if only they were susceptible to encouragement.

Peak tech! Bacon vending machine signals apex of human invention

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Re: achingly hip

Vegan eh?

Total Inability To Support User Phones: O2 fries, burning data for 32 million Brits

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In unrelated news....


UK spies: You know how we said bulk device hacking would be used sparingly? Well, things have 'evolved'...

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Black Helicopters

Equipment interference

Beginning at O2?

After all that! Ofcom proposes BT as only broadband universal services provider for whole of UK (except Hull)

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Re: Independent how?

I understand the first bit but why would you want diarrhoea?

Shocker: UK smart meter rollout is crap, late and £500m over budget

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Re: Smart meters do not save energy

The primary benefit to the supplier is the ability to introduce Uber-style surge pricing.

Cheeky cheesemaker fails to copyright how things taste

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Re: non-dairy (sheep, goats) cheese

See https://www.dictionary.com/browse/dairy

Guess who's back, back again? China's back, hacking your friends: Beijing targets American biz amid tech tariff tiff

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Yes, patients often expire when subjected to a bullet or a big bang.

Stairway to edam: Swiss bloke blasts roquefort his cheese, thinks Led Zep might make it tastier

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Re: roll through Gloucester twice

Make sure to chase it down Cooper's Hill.

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While My Gruyere Gently Weeps - The Beatles

The Advent Of Paneer - Gentle Giant

East Of Edam - Dead Can Dance

Musica Emmental - Dead Can Dance

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Do you suppose...

...he's hoping to produce some tubular Babybels?

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Gong's Camembert Electrique album surely?

Or maybe Hawkwind's Quark, Strangeness and Charm.

Planet Computers straps proper phone to its next Psion scion, Cosmo

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You'll need big pockets

...since the Cosmo is no small piece.

Swedes grumbling about Apple Store in their park are lucky – in Toronto, Google eats all your data

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Re: Maybe a better design would be...


"a modern-day town square, where everyone is welcome in a space where the best of Apple comes together to connect with one another, discover a new passion, or take their skill to the next level,"

The question is, will this square have rounded corners?

Chuck this on expenses: £2k iPad paints Apple as the premium fondleslab specialist – as planned

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Re: Nobody is forcing you to buy a fully specced one.

I rather hope nobody is forcing me to buy any one.

Budget 2018: Landlords could be forced to grant access for full-fibre connections

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Re: Force landlords?

Where is the rent?

I must have the rent!

Dollars, dimes and nickels,

I need them all right now!

All through the house, not a creature was stirring... especially Samsung smartwatches: Batteries empty at 3AM

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Re: S9 has a locked bootloader so flashing the device with...Lineage is out of the question

Are you sure?


Maybe you have a network variant model.

Samsung Galaxy A9: Mid-range bruiser that takes the fight to Huawei

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Re: How did you do the upgrade?

Instructions here: https://wiki.lineageos.org/devices/i9300/install

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Re: GT-i9300

Mine runs pretty well on Android 7.1 (although not as well as my S5 on 8.1.) The trick is to get rid of all the Google & Samsung crap.

Ding ding! Round Two: Second annual review for transatlantic data flow deal Privacy Shield

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When did we start using reticence in place of reluctance? (See also refute vs reject.)

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave me tea... pigs-in-blankets-flavoured tea

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Re: can't get a rizla paper between them

Well I don't know what the downvotes are about, but where I live Tesco is a lot cheaper than Waitrose.

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Re: Christmas tree ... unutterably disgusting

I agree. The Toilet Duck flavour is much better.

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Re: can't get a rizla paper between them

Really? I don't know much about Morrisons, but Tesco & Waitrose? You must be as rich as Croesus.

A web where the user has complete control of their data? Sounds Solid, Tim Berners-Lee

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Re: who do you want to be your data overlords?

You can self-host. I think the odds are against it for reasons stated by other commenters, but I hope it succeeds. BTW, did I mention you can self-host?

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Re: Good Luck

You're right. It will probably work too. For example, I explained Tor to my SO the other night. Her first words after were "I bet paedophiles use that." She conceded that the legitimate uses I suggested were valid, but it just shows where the minds of those who rarely, if ever, think about this stuff go to first.

Location, location, location... technologies under the microscope

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It was Ireland's biggest lingerie department I understand.

Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

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Re: never seems to taste the same?

Hard vs soft water.

Open-source alt-droid wants to know if it's still leaking data to Google

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Re: Difficult to see that appealing to manufacturers

It depends on the size of the market which can be demonstrated. That's the point of the cloud services. If it looks big enough, some will bite.

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Re: extensive hardware

I think the idea is to demonstrate viability to hardware manufacturers by building out the cloud services first and attract users who are comfortable with building and/or installing custom ROMs. If take up is sufficient to convince device makers to do some small-ish production runs then the hope might be that desire for a Google & Apple free smartphone is widespread enough that those runs are repeated in greater numbers. It's going to be an uphill struggle for sure. But I think it's worth supporting as, although I'm a long time CM/LOS user, I've never been able to convince otherwise interested Android users to void their manufacturers warranties.

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Re: Why?

Read the conversation in comments here:


UK.gov's no-deal plans leave HMRC customs, VAT systems scrambling to keep up

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Re: the department felt it had been acting lawfully

Feelings are irrelevant, especially so for a government department.


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