* Posts by Joseph Haig

210 posts • joined 25 Apr 2007

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IBM memo to staff: Our CEO Ginni is visiting so please 'act normally!'

Joseph Haig

When meeting a hippogriff^w^wGinni.

"Yeh always wait fer the hippogriff ter make the firs' move. It's polite, see? Yeh walk towards him, and yeh bow, an' yeh wait. If he bows back, yeh're allowed to touch him. If he doesn' bow, then get away from him sharpish, 'cause those talons hurt."

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Relive your misspent, 8-bit youth on the BBC's reopened Micro archive

Joseph Haig

BeebEm

For those interested, the BeebEm emulator from 1994 is still kicking around: http://beebem-unix.bbcmicro.com/

5
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Facebook Android app caught seeking 'superuser' clearance

Joseph Haig

Just don't use the app

You can still use Facebook in the mobile browser and get most of the functionality. It will tell you that you need the app for viewing messages but that is a lie and they are accessible by using a non-standard browser such as Opera.

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Google's socially awkward geeks craft socially awkward AI bot that calls people for you

Joseph Haig

Re: "The software pretends to be you, or act for you"...

Actually, I'm thinking more of this.

1
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NetHack to drop support for floppy disks, Amiga, 16-bit DOS and OS/2

Joseph Haig

Re: Bastards

Watch out for those ants. They are nasty.

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UK 'meltdown' bank TSB's owner: Our IT migration was a 'success'

Joseph Haig

Where did it go?

Is it just me or has the press release just vanished?

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Joseph Haig

Lost in translation?

Their logo adequately sums up the contents of that press release.

Really, companies need to consider their branding when they start operating in foreign countries.

27
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Fleeing Facebook app users realise what they agreed to in apps years ago – total slurpage

Joseph Haig

Re: well

"It works, it's just disabled on cellphones."

Quite. When I said it no longer worked I meant it was blocked. There was a period when you got the annoying message asking you to install the app but it would still let you through to the messages but that option disappeared eventually.

And your suggestion to try m.facebook.com gave me the idea to try using a non-default browser. It turns out that with the Opera Mini browser I can now access messages again via the web app.

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Joseph Haig

Re: well

"You didn't install the Messenger app, but did you install the Facebook app or was it included with the phone and not uninstallable?"

If you uninstall the Facebook app (as I did when it made my phone too unresponsive) you find that the mobile web site is almost fully functional so there is really no need for an app.

The one thing that doesn't work is private messages. It used to work, so there is no technical reason why it shouldn't any more, but if you try to view messages you now get automatically directed to the Google Play store. It is almost as if Facebook needs the app to do more than just display some text and pictures on your screen.

I, too, am glad I never gave in to the nagging although my reason is that I want a phone that I can actually use.

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Your code is RUBBISH, says GitHub. Good thing we're here to save you

Joseph Haig

Re: Rubbish is everywhere

Yes, but I am free to contribute my own rubbish to open source software!

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Joseph Haig

Ambiguous headline

"Your code is RUBBISH, says GitHub"?

No, more like "your code uses a particular version of a library that has a security vulnerability which is fixed in a later version."

Personally, I think that what GitHub has done is fantastic.

17
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Slack cuts ties to IRC and XMPP, cos they don't speak Emoji

Joseph Haig

Accessibility

I have a former colleague who is blind and so uses IRC to access Slack. I understand that Slack have a team working on accessibility but unfortunately it is still not quite there yet so by cutting support they are unnecessarily introducing a barrier to blind and partially sighted people.

16
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Sysadmin left finger on power button for an hour to avert SAP outage

Joseph Haig

Going Dutch?

Is this what the Little Dutch Boy is doing now?

3
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Uber quits GitHub for in-house code after 2016 data breach

Joseph Haig

Uber's business model

Hey, they aren't a security company so the rules around security shouldn't apply to them.

7
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'No evidence' UK.gov has done much to break up IT outsourcing

Joseph Haig

NHoS

Meanwhile, they have gone out of their way to shut down an attempt to provide a viable solution to the mess that is the NHS IT:

https://nhos.openhealthhub.org/nhsbuntu/2018/01/17/the-final-straw/

0
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YouTuber cements head inside microwave oven

Joseph Haig

Darwin denied

... unless, of course, the five firefighters then took it in turns to kick him in the balls.

6
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Used iPhone Safari in 2011-12? You might qualify for Google bucks

Joseph Haig
Devil

Just wondering

Is that about the same time they stopped using the "Don't be Evil" slogan?

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Uber says 2.7 MEEELLION(ish) UK users affected by hack

Joseph Haig

But Uber isn't a security company so these security regulations shouldn't apply to them, right?

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IBM does what IBM does best: Raises the chopper again

Joseph Haig

IBMers have until this Friday, 1 December, to nominate colleagues to represent them.

... and may the odds be ever in your favour.

4
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The Independent 'live streamed' space vid recorded in 2015

Joseph Haig

It wasn't fake, it was just old.

This isn't the first time a news article has used archive footage to say "this is happening now", typically with alarmist headlines. These instances have rightly been judged as fake even if the photographs are legitimate records of another event.

Yes, the video is genuine but using it to attract an audience by claiming that it is 'live' is deceitful.

4
1

Hipsterverse horror as Slack takes Halloween hiatus

Joseph Haig

Re: During the meanwhile ...

I learned IRC nearly 30 years ago, and it hasn't gone down since.

... until you get a netsplit.

For the record, I also would be happy with IRC, which does the vast majority of what people need (apart from some essential features such as giphy), but Slack is where all the cool kids are these days.

0
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Bill Gates says he'd do CTRL-ALT-DEL with one key if given the chance to go back through time

Joseph Haig

Re: BREAK

On Acorn computers you only had to press 'Break' by itself and it was incredibly frustrating to accidentally touch it after spending hours at some important work*. Requiring two or three keys in combination is a much better idea.

* OK I admit it, games.

72
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Slack re-invents the extranet and shared Notes databases with cross-company teams

Joseph Haig

Notes productivity

I'm sorry but I have difficulty reading any further after you have put 'Lotus Notes' and 'more productive' in the same sentence.

7
1

Boffin rediscovers 1960s attempt to write fiction with computers

Joseph Haig
Trollface

The Lion

Still a better story than Twilight.

4
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UK.gov is hiring IT bods with skills in ... Windows Vista?!

Joseph Haig

Are they looking for someone to upgrade the new aircraft carrier? (https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/06/27/hms_queen_elizabeth_running_windows_xp/)

3
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Facebook pulls plug on language-inventing chatbots? THE TRUTH

Joseph Haig

Alice & Bob

Presumably they were caught by Eve.

3
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Facebook users pwnd by phone with account recovery vulnerability

Joseph Haig

Nothing like good security!

I'm so glad I never succumbed to adding my phone number for extra security (allegedly).

9
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Set your alarms for 2.40am UTC – so you can watch Unix time hit 1,500,000,000

Joseph Haig

Damn right. GMT and UTC can be up to 500ms different.

I need that extra time in bed in the morning!

4
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€100 'typewriter' turns out to be €45,000 Enigma machine

Joseph Haig

Reason for sale

"I'm getting rid of it because all the keys are messed up. Every time I type something it shows complete gibberish!"

66
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Trump's CNN tantrum could delay $85bn AT&T-Time Warner merger

Joseph Haig

Re: Wrong - it's pure blackmail accroding to US statutes

Except in the real world, no they didn't.

I presume you are referring to CNN threatening to dox the individual - correct me if I'm wrong.

I don't know about what the amendments do or do not say but how do you explain:

"CNN reserves the right to publish his identity should any of that change."

(Ref: http://edition.cnn.com/2017/07/04/politics/kfile-reddit-user-trump-tweet/index.html)

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Joseph Haig

Whose tantrum?

Trump posts an infantile video and then CNN spend the next day talking about nothing else. Who is having a tantrum?

This pretty much sums it up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgB8z5OOVjQ

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Ubuntu 'weaponised' to cure NHS of its addiction to Microsoft Windows

Joseph Haig

Re: It will take 1-2 more WannaCries

There's no particular reason why Linux is more secure than Windows.

That is true and anyone who claims to be inherently secure simply because of any particular OS is setting themselves up for a massive pratfall.

However, any up-to-date version of Linux is massively more secure than Windows XP, which ceased being supported years ago. Of course, a modern version of Windows is also secure but the reason XP is still so widely used is because upgrading on the scale of the NHS is so expensive and such a logistical nightmare. Yes, for the sake of security they should have upgraded to Vista, then 7, then 8 and now 10 but the cost and the breaking changes each time made it impossible.

In so far as an upgrade is necessary, and the upgrade will be painful in any event, it makes sense to find a solution that is not going to result in the same problem in another 10 years time.

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HMS Windows XP: Britain's newest warship running Swiss Cheese OS

Joseph Haig

Just a thought

Is this because there are still some MOD systems that still require Internet Explorer 6?

7
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Lloyds finally inks mega 10-year cloudy outsourcing deal with IBM

Joseph Haig

Re: Hmmm

Maybe they can cram enough people into a helicopter to make it less than £75 per person.

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IBM: ALL travel must be approved now, and shut up about the copter

Joseph Haig

IBM said staff will be covered by IBM Life Assurance if they are on "approved" travel.

I dread to think what counts as "approved travel" if life insurance is a requirement.

14
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The Big Blue Chopper video that IBM might want to keep quiet

Joseph Haig

Re: Dilussions of grandure....

Don't forget Hursley is part of the USA arm of IBM. So in IBM's eyes, she was still on American soil.

Hence the cricket pitch?

2
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Joseph Haig

Re: Limo

I was thinking the same. The gardener is going to go ballistic (unless he has been laid off to save money).

19
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Toyota's entertaining the idea of Linux in cars

Joseph Haig

Re: Eggs

Being able to put all your eggs in it was one of the design requirements for the Citroen 2CV.

12
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Windows is now built on Git, but Microsoft has found some bottlenecks

Joseph Haig

"built on sand"

Well that's where the silicon comes from so you could say that the whole industry is built on sand.

9
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IBM CEO Ginni flouts £75 travel crackdown, rides Big Blue chopper

Joseph Haig

... and maybe IBM have finally innovated again, and come up with a sustainable energy source

Perhaps that is the plan to generate new revenue. My guess is that TJ Watson is doing a few thousand RPM right now. Someone should check on his grave to see if anyone has rigged up some wires to the nearest IBM lab.

8
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Today's bonkers bug report: Microsoft Edge can't print numbers

Joseph Haig

Re: "It won't be noticed by 99.999999999%"

What about the other 32%?

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Gang-briefed by IBM bosses in Hawaii? Nah, I'll take redundancy

Joseph Haig

Re: "there was no automatic qualification based on sales quota"

Sorry, I missed the "n't". Thanks for pointing it out. :-)

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Joseph Haig

"there was no automatic qualification based on sales quota"

Just as well as IBM is more than just sales and marketing, is it?

3
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IBM UK: Oh, remote workers. We want to be colocated with you again

Joseph Haig

Re: Cost Savings

What if they are good?

If they are good then they will be on higher salaries so extra savings!

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2009 IBM: Teleworking will save the WORLD! 2017 IBM: Get back to the office or else

Joseph Haig

Good for customers?

Maybe this is a bit simplistic but doesn't remote working also allow people to be physically located closer to customers? I guess that IBM are now only interested in customers within a reasonable range of their six strategic offices in the US.

9
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Big blues: IBM's remote-worker crackdown is company-wide, including its engineers

Joseph Haig
Trollface

Re: IBM

8 hours to invoke goodwin´s law? Pretty quick for a thread about working from home...

The Nazis wouldn't have let you work from home.

6
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Google mistakes the entire NHS for massive cyber-attacking botnet

Joseph Haig

... while he Googles "how to perform open heart surgery"

It could be worse. It might be that he is being talked through it by a 12-year-old on Slack.

2
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Lord of the Dance set to deliver high kicks at Trump’s big ball

Joseph Haig

Re: because their candidate lost

She got millions more votes though.

But he won according to the rules of the election. That's democracy for you, imperfect though it is.

Are you one of those who insists that we shouldn't leave the EU because Scotland and Nothern Ireland voted remain and/or it should have required more than 50%?

Democracy allows you to protest but not to demand that the rules change after then event when a vote goes against you.

4
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Happy 20th birthday to the RADIUS RFC

Joseph Haig

Re: Stock photography

Yes, we demand a new photograph for every 'project is X years old' story from now on with someone of the correct age.

I think that IBM is 106 this year.

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