* Posts by Fred Dibnah

242 posts • joined 29 Oct 2008


CES flicks the off switch on massager award… and causes a buzz

Fred Dibnah

Just give it time and it will fit, Minis are getting larger and more ridiculous by the week. Alec Issigonis must be turning in his grave.

NHS England claims it will be all-digital within the decade

Fred Dibnah

He was probably taking notes while you told him your symptoms. That's what my GP does and I've never had a problem with him providing a good diagnosis. Would you rather he'd scribbled notes in a pad and then entered them on the computer later, causing a delay before seeing the next patient?

My surgery uses the Evergreen app, which is brilliant for when you go to see a consultant and they don't have your records to hand. Want blood results? Just show them in the app.

Small American town rejects Comcast – while ISP reps take issue with your El Reg vultures

Fred Dibnah

Re: On your bike

It was the odious Norman Tebbit who made the comment, not the slightly less odious Michael Hestletine. But your point still stands.

Adobe Flash zero-day exploit... leveraging ActiveX… embedded in Office Doc... BINGO!

Fred Dibnah

Re: Flash, ActiveX, Office doc embedding/scripting - should already be DISABLED

I consulted some reference documents in The Beano and can confirm it’s definitely ‘Arrgh’

Mystery sign-poster pities the fool who would litter the UK's West Midlands

Fred Dibnah

Re: If you're going to put up a sign...

What’s a ‘speed trap’?

Analogue radio is the tech that just won't die

Fred Dibnah

Re: Analogue Radio Must Never Die

Isn’t any service available only when the transmission medium works? The OP said that TMS and the shipping forecast were not broadcast on DAB, which is incorrect.

Fred Dibnah

Re: Analogue Radio Must Never Die

TMS & the shipping forecast are both on DAB.

Washington Post offers invalid cookie consent under EU rules – ICO

Fred Dibnah

Re: Other solution

In that case you could simply go to one of those other outlets which take WP copy, and read it there. No news is so important that a few minutes delay is going to make a difference.

Where to implant my employee microchip? I have the ideal location

Fred Dibnah

Is your office on Mornington Crescent?

Microsoft promises a fix for Windows 10 zip file woes. In November

Fred Dibnah

Re: Windows Search

It’s telling that the shortcut Win-f opens Search now, when originally it opened Find. That’s progress for you.

With sorry Soyuz stuffed, who's going to run NASA's space station taxi service now?

Fred Dibnah

Re: Lose one bloody capsule in 50 years


1967 (OK 51 years ago, but still): Soyuz 1 - 1 dead (Komarov)

1971: Soyuz 11 - decompressed on re-entry; 3 dead


New Zealand border cops warn travelers that without handing over electronic passwords 'You shall not pass!'

Fred Dibnah
Thumb Up

Re: Have fun!

Thanks, I was looking for ideas of old films to watch.

Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

Fred Dibnah

Police station mapping

Back in the very old days when every town had a police station that actually opened its doors more than one hour a week, they were usually well signposted and always had a town map on the wall in the lobby. Other good alternatives were petrol stations and estate agents.

Even now there's always the option of winding down the window and asking for directions. Human interaction has its advantages sometimes.

Fred Dibnah

Re: Alternativly

You wake up Mr Barraclough and go back to Slade Prison.

Fred Dibnah

Re: Tea with milk

Sshhh, nobody tell the God's Own Country mob that their water is soft and not dead hard, they'll never live it down.

Fred Dibnah

Re: As you might expect...

"Unless someone turns off both GPS and the phone system it will always be able to triangulate you and so it is impossible to get truly lost."

There is one other scenario, in which your phone's battery runs out. Which is why taking a paper map & a compass as backup is sound advice.

BTW don't get me started* on how shit google maps and their alternatives are. White roads with grey edges on a pale grey background doesn't make for readable mapping, especially on a phone in broad daylight. OS is the gold standard to which all other maps should aspire.

* Looks like I did that myself. I'll get me gore-tex jacket.

I want to buy a coffee with an app – how hard can it be?

Fred Dibnah

For your next challenge, Mr Dabbs...

...buy an electric car and have a go at using public chargers.

Brit airport pulls flight info system offline after attack by 'online crims'

Fred Dibnah

Good for them

So it is possible to have an IT outage in an airport without generating hordes of angry passengers who have been kept in the dark about what's happening to their flights.

Leeds hospital launches campaign to 'axe the fax'

Fred Dibnah

The radiography department's Christmas party might generate a few.

You'll never guess what you can do once you steal a laptop, reflash the BIOS, and reboot it

Fred Dibnah


That explains the Globe Theatre.

'World's favorite airline' favorite among hackers: British Airways site, app hacked for two weeks

Fred Dibnah

From their FAQs

"Should I call my bank or cancel my credit cards?

We recommend you contact your bank and follow their recommended advice."

Talk about passing the buck. WTF is 'recommended advice'?

Glad I'm not a customer (never liked them, especially since they started flying international only out of London).

HTTPS crypto-shame: TV Licensing website pulled offline

Fred Dibnah

Re: We take security very seriously


I'm just out for a swift half.

Trainer regrets giving straight answer to staffer's odd question

Fred Dibnah

New laptop wanted

I was having my laptop repaired or upgraded (I forget which), and had a moan to the support guy about how flimsy the (Dell) laptop was. He suggested I could get a new one by switching it on, hard disc spinning, wrapping it in bubble wrap, and throwing it at a wall.

It may be poor man's Photoshop, but GIMP casts a Long Shadow with latest update

Fred Dibnah

Re: Forget the geeky stuff, sort out the user experience.

Thanks for reaching out, Flossy. :-)

Use Debian? Want Intel's latest CPU patch? Small print sparks big problem

Fred Dibnah

You’re not a geography person either. The Netherlands is in the EU :-)

Amazon meets the incredible SHRINKING UK taxman

Fred Dibnah

Re: Just remember

”It is using our roads, partly paid for by vehicle excise duty and partly by fuel tax..”

...but mostly paid for out of general taxation. Which, imho, they don’t make a fair contribution to, given their enormous income in this country.

Dixons Carphone: Yeah, so, about that hack we said hit 1.2m records? Multiply that by 8.3

Fred Dibnah

It would be fun, but it might also make people do proper research and think twice before slithering from one company to another, and as a result ‘encourage’ incumbents to keep their house in order.

Fred Dibnah

Re: Have I shopped with them?

IANAGDPRExpert but I thought it required such selections to be opt in?

Shock Land Rover Discovery: Sellers could meddle with connected cars if not unbound

Fred Dibnah

When you sell a phone with your data still on it, the buyer gets access to your data. In this case the seller gets access to information about the buyer such as location data, with the added ‘bonus’ of being able to remotely control the vehicle they sold.

Brits whinging less? About ISPs, networks and TV? It's gotta be a glitch in the Matrix

Fred Dibnah


I'm going to whinge about your mis-spelling of 'whingeing'.

East Midlands network-sniffer wails: Openreach, fix my outage-ridden line

Fred Dibnah

"But given the problems being reported, we're going to investigate further. "

What they really meant was "Given the bad publicity that this article could generate, we might get off our lazy arses and actually make an effort to fix the problem. However, if we don't see the story picked up by other news outlets, we'll make a carefully considered decision to not do anything at all."

IBM memo to staff: Our CEO Ginni is visiting so please 'act normally!'

Fred Dibnah

Watching Le Tour would be far more entertaining though.

Fred Dibnah

Allegedly, the queen thinks that everywhere in the UK smells of fresh paint.

National ID cards might not mean much when up against incompetence of the UK Home Office

Fred Dibnah

Re: How much ID cards cost?

I reckon they’d screw it up no matter how much money was shovelled into their trough.

Universal Credit has never delivered bang for buck, but now there's no turning back – watchdog

Fred Dibnah

Re: Funny how they didn't mention...

We don’t all vote Tory.

UC isn’t meant to work. Currently we’re at step two of the neo-liberal system for public services, of degrade —> discredit —> privatise.

That was quick: Seattle rushes to kill tax that would mildly inconvenience Amazon

Fred Dibnah

Re: Not as simple as all that...

You picked the wrong icon, AC. The one with 'Joke Alert!' on it is the one you need.

In defence of online ads: The 'net ain't free and you ain't paying

Fred Dibnah

Re: The thing is... it's nothing new.

You have to pay extra for Sky+ to give you the ability to avoid ads, which is a bit like paying subs to a website for the same thing. But at least there's an added bonus of being able to record and playback when you like. I can't see an equivalent bonus on any website so uBlock & NoScript are staying.

Oddly enough, when a Tesla accelerates at a barrier, someone dies: Autopilot report lands

Fred Dibnah

Re: These are all valid questions

It's a shame the people who made Twenty-Twelve haven't made a brexit comedy series to run alongside the real thing. But I suppose we wouldn't be able to work out which is which.

Fred Dibnah

Re: The right person to blame is the USA highways administration.

"...real time integration of both car, bike, pedestrian and street level systems..."

What might these bike and pedestrian systems be? I hope you're not thinking that cyclists and peds will be told to carry a beacon to prevent AVs from hitting them.

Fingered: Pants-down 'poo jogger' alleged to be corp exec

Fred Dibnah

Re: "Where you chose to shit on the other hand is a personal choice"

No idea if this is true or not:

Young man [after seeing Churchill leave the bathroom without washing his hands]: "At Eton, they taught us to wash our hands after using the toilet."

Churchill: "At Harrow, they taught us not to piss on our hands."

IoT CloudPets in the doghouse after damning security audit: Now Amazon bans sales

Fred Dibnah

So a company that markets & sells devices that listen to your every word is going to stop selling someone else's devices that listen to your every word.

UK military may recruit wheezy, alcoholic keyboard warriors

Fred Dibnah

""North Korea: Hard to get to, no free wi-fi, boss-man is a bit of a nutter. Would not visit again."

See also: United States of America.

The future of radio may well be digital, but it won't survive on DAB

Fred Dibnah

Re: Out of sync

Those cheers are unlikely if England are playing.

Uber says it's changed and is now ever-so ShinyHappy™

Fred Dibnah

Management drivel

“... moving forward it is time to move in a new direction”

So they’re going to stop moving forward then.

We've found it! A cloud-and-AI angle on the royal wedding

Fred Dibnah

Re: Now that

But thanks for the reminder to go somewhere with no internet, phone, radio or TV coverage this Saturday. A nice walk in the hills beckons.

You've got pr0n: Yes, smut by email is latest workaround for UK's looming cock block

Fred Dibnah

Re: Probably mentioned already but

Look forward to when the assistant rings for the supervisor, calling out "Porn permit for aisle 6"

There will be blood: BT to axe 13,000 employees

Fred Dibnah

Dreadful. Straight out of the David Brent Book of Management.


Mobileye's autonomous cars are heading to California. But they're not going to kill anyone. At least not on purpose

Fred Dibnah

Re: Strawmen

"I don't recollect ever seeing that bouncing ball, in [mumble] years of life."

I have. The ball was mine, I was about six years old, and if the driver hadn't been alert I wouldn't be writing this.

So when can you get in the first self-driving car? GM says 2019. Mobileye says 2021. Waymo says 2018 – yes, this year

Fred Dibnah

Re: Mini roundabouts,....

I was taught not to trust a flashing indicator unless I actually saw it come on. Even then, there's the situation where someone indicates to turn in a different place to where you think they are heading (just past a junction for example).


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