* Posts by Joe

58 posts • joined 24 Sep 2008

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Boffins: Send robot lawn tractors to the Moon

Joe

Aren'ty there international laws...

against nukes in space? Not that that'd stop anybody, but just thought I'd ask

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Obama says his new chopper is 'procurement gone amuck'

Joe

Gone amok?

Surely?

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Straw slaps ban on Iraq debate docs

Joe
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And as democaracy slowly dies...

The vast majority of the public care not one jot. As long as nothing affects the TV schedule. I weep for the future of the nation, I really do

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NASA CO2 scan satellite launch fails

Joe
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One word....

FAIL

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Boffin: Earthlike worlds within 30 lightyears of here

Joe
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I for one....

will not be being predictable in the comments section

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Man U fan pwned in Facebook honeypot

Joe

This has been doing the rounds on football forums for a while....

And still never fails to amuse! What an utter retard!

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UFO ruled out of wind farm prang

Joe
Alien

I'm sure this will silence the conspiracy theorists...

IT'S A COVER UP!!!!111oneone

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Wacky Jacqui Smith says whole country crusading against CCTV

Joe
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CCTV really has helped...

Look how much safer the streets are now than 10 or 20 years ago....oh...

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MP wants Welsh text on ID cards

Joe
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I'm from lancashire...

So I want mine written in lancashire speak!

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Birmingham drops the possessive apostrophe

Joe

Let battle commence

"apple's for £1" saw that this morning....ARRRRRRRRRGH

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American Stereotype™ walks Google's mean Street View

Joe
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Hahahahahahahahahaha

Hahahahahahahahaha that is TOO perfect!

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Lucky Mancs could get ID cards first, Jacqui declares

Joe

Hopefully not Greater Manchester

I live in Wigan, which is in Greater Manchester. If she just means the City of Manchester, I'll be fine!

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Vladimir Putin bitchslaps Dell-boy

Joe
Flame

Oooooh Vlad,

you bitch!

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Red Dwarf finally returns to Earth

Joe
Coat

@AC

Ah, so you're a waffle man??

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Joe
Unhappy

I have a very, very bad feeling about this...

I just don't think it can come close to the originals, especially as series 7 and 8 were so poor once Grant left the writing staff *sigh*

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Doner kebabs: Death wrapped in pitta bread

Joe
Coat

@ ASH

"Shirley Kebab House Chicken Tikka Kebab is a Naan full of W1N after a night out..."

Surely you mean a Naan full of H5N1?

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Joe
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Shish Kebab ftw

Not just for health reasons, but also because they don't taste like chilli anus

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DARPA seeks spraycan wound-polyfilla* for injured troops

Joe
Flame

@ AC 14:58

This is DARPA, the designers should think themselves lucky there wasn't a specification that it must use frickin' lazers and be able to fly.

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Joe
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That's brilliant!

How long til some South London stab victim dies due to his mates filling him to bursting with expanding wall-insulation foam?

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Retired army generals: Spend Trident money on the army

Joe
Joke

Why don't we...

Just use all the ICBMs and WMDs we found in Iraq?

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LibDem cheeky boy rides to Segway's rescue

Joe

@ Richard Gadsden

Ah fair enough. I never knew they could listen in on debates from elsewhere. Also it's the Iraq debate that preceded this, which nobody turned up to, that made me question it. Couldn't really care less about segways

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Joe
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Do no MPs ever turn up for debates?

Surely that's what they get paid for?

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Cops taser JCB thief in 'slowest police chase ever'

Joe
Alert

How big a JCB are we talking here?

One of those mini ones you get on roadworks or a proper monster one?

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Cash-strapped US businessman jumps from light aircraft

Joe
Dead Vulture

He fled into the woods...

and the rozzers didn't bother to chase him???

'Yes, officer...I have my ID just over he - RUN AWAY!!!"

Grave, 'cos I for one believe him

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UFO damages Lincolnshire wind turbine

Joe
Alien

I for one welcome....

Our new carbon-conscious overlords

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Tories pledge high speed broadband for all in 10 years

Joe
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So he's promising...

exactly what's already been proposed/what is already happening??

Despite how much I hate NuLab I could never vote for that smug, policy-less arsehole.

Lib Dems FTW

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MoD tops lost security pass league

Joe
Joke

Champione!

Champione! ole! ole! ole!

What do they win?

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Kamikaze ballooning Brazilian soars to Darwin Award

Joe
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@ Aaron

Belgium has a coast, Antwerp being one of Europes biggest ports. So not really inland. Geogra-fail

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UK.gov to push Obama for tougher rules online

Joe
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I find NuLab unacceptable....

So can we ban all this bullshit they keep coming up with??

Listen to the guy talk, you can clearly tell he has no idea how the internet works. What next?

'Don't type Google into Google, warns Burnham'

Tosser

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DARPA aim to make killer robots invulnerable to damage

Joe
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I for one....

welcome our Chris Long overlords

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Joe
Coat

I for one....

welcome our self-replicating, indestructible, killbot overlords

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China 'bans' BBC's Chinese website

Joe
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Is it possible...

that they're trying to prevent the creation of a Chinese language twat-o-tron? It could certainly pose a threat to Party rule with it's cutting, incisive social commentary

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Aussie boffins use sarcasm to investigate brain illness

Joe
Coat

O

RLY?

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Max Planck Institute punts 'hot, young housewives'

Joe
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EPIC FAIL

hahaha classic, that's one 'sinologist' getting sacked...

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Ofcom rules on Clarkson strumpet gag

Joe
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Finally

common sense prevails

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Lego terrorist threatens democracy

Joe
Coat

@ Adam Foxton

"even the mainstream Rambo II was dedicated to the "brave fighters of afghanistan" or something similar"

Rambo III actually....

Don't worry, I'll grab it on my way out

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Tell Santa to bring more assault rifles

Joe
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@ AC 14:58

" I think you'll find it was Martha and the Vandellas."

ZING!

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Joe
Coat

Guns don't kill people...

rappers do!

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New terror guidelines on photography

Joe
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I wonder...

which ones will the Filth follow, the actual law or the new 'guidelines' that seek to bend the law to their way of thinking....

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Oz bill-dodgers nailed on Facebook

Joe

Another??

How many more people have to suffer public Facebook Fail before people learn??

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Zoo's polar bear breeding plan scuppered by girl-on-girl

Joe
Coat

Fail

'nuff said

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Juror dismissed over Facebook poll

Joe
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Ask the average facebook member...

'ya he wel luks gillty, lock him up! lyf means lyf!

Pass this judgement to 5 other people to reveal the secret of eternal life'

Cretins

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Google tells the world how to talk

Joe
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I dread to think...

...what my thick lancashire accent would bring up on those voice searches....

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Slo-mo MoD budget traincrash rolls on

Joe

Camera grenade??

Couldn't the evildoer in the other room simply shoot/step on it as soon as it flew through the door?

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Taser's French distributor cuffed in commie spying case

Joe
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You owe me a new keyboard....

That sub-heading just resulted in it being sprayed with tea!

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Black widows: Coming soon to a kitchen sink near you

Joe
Linux

Argh!

I hate spiders, no issue with normal one's I live in peace with them but any creature that can bite/sting/poison should be exterminated. I may move to the antarctic to be out of the way of these evil things. Who's with me?

The picture? Well, penguins live in the Antarctic...

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Channel 4 in Heathrow Playmobil reconstruction shocker

Joe
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All you need to do...

is send in the PFY to sort them out

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US military: Electropulse bombs now from next year

Joe
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Scud range?

Someone needs to tell that Maryland fella that even if the 'terrorists' invent an EMP bomb and somehow aqquire a working SCUD to attach it to....where are they going to fire it from?? A SCUD range is around 300-400 miles maximum. So there's not really much chance of it getting anywhere near Maryland unless there's a new militant islamic group, Al-Canadia, that I haven't heard of?

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Bebo users release interstellar spamgasm at Gliese 581

Joe
Coat

I for one....

Welcome our new emo social-networking alien overlords

Yes, that's the one... I'll just take it and be on my way....

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DARPA seeks Special Forces submersible aeroplane

Joe
Pirate

@bigyin

Nope Ekranoplan was a water-skimming 'plane'. The one I'nm thinking of was a 2 engined propellor plane that could land on water, submerge, then carry on as a mini-submarine. I can't get wiki at work but it's on there or google 'soviet flying submarine'

Ekranoplans are sweet though, I want one

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