Posts by Rafael Moslin

No surprise

UIS have to deal with two things, first a mess of extremely dated in house applications written in all sorts of languages, nice web front ends often hide the chaos below the surface. Secondly, it's two departments brought together and half the staff hiss at the other as they pass in corridors. I see this less about how good Hermes may or may not have been and more a move to mainstream IT support models.You can have as many Perl scripts as you like, but UIS is trying to deliver a service and be a service provider when many think it's their own fiefdom.

Whoa there if you are on Three...

Unlike O2, who count an MMS as 4 SMS messages out of your allowance, Three charge you £0.25 for a MMS message. As I recently found out after jumping ships from O2 to Three and getting £5 worth of charges.

My perfect cup of canteen tea

According to my friend Charlie the story goes like this:

Bag + Cup

Cup tilted at alarming angle and inserted into oversized hot water dispenser unit (with undersized dispenser tray)

Note water temperature at a maximum of 83 degrees. Some say, sub optimal, I say you’ll be lucky

Push and hold water button

Assuming approximately 30ml per second flow rate, count to 10.

Realise flow rate is slightly higher today as water isn’t running uphill and Anglia Water have another pump on

Watch water pour over the top of cup and dribble down the counter top.

Mop up = Brewing Time

Prod mechanical cow to dispense anywhere from 5-50ml of milk

Spend approximately 1 minute fishing around with a half melted and weak stemmed plastic spoon attempting to extract tea bag.

Add sugar, x2 sachets of fair-trade brown sugar, realising that x1 sachet equates to one third to one half a tea spoon

Stir feverishly with the remnants of the melted spoon.

Decamp to the office and enjoy. Ahh.

Not released here it isn't.

It's a global online community and a small world - unless your an American corporation of course.

Ooo but surely...

Eh? Surely all that needs to be done is to deploy the "Interstellar Hydrogen Gas Compensator Circuit" and all will be well...

Oh goody, so now they understand how it works...

Ye gods, am I the only one worried by:

"The LHC is a much better understood machine than it was a year ago," says CERN chief Rolf Heuer.

So does this mean that they built this thing and then someone went routing amongst the polystyrene at the bottom of the box for the manual?!

And that's bad because?!

What a peculiar statement to make, "The European habit of forcing the calling party pay for the call...", far as it seems to me that is how it should be, if someone initiates a call then that person is the one that is using the infrastructure and therefore should pay. Surely in the US landline owners do not have to pay for miss-dials and spam or other unwanted calls?!

Holy fruit based telecommunication device!

Hunks in trunks + Gadgets, blimey, I'm in heaven!

Is today the El Reg sex edition, what with "Car-prang secretary bites off boss's todger" and now this story?!

Perfect end to the week!

Look, I just want to say thanks as I've not laughed so much in ages, half the team here at work where in tears... except for one person who felt that their monitor had been sullied but they're a DBA so don't count...!

It really is August...

..and we are firmly in the "silly season" for news stories!

Best bit of all is that some people actually bothered to complaine, unbeleiveable, get a life!