* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

16005 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

Post-pub nosh deathmatch: Kapsalon v quesadillas

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Big Brother

Citizen, you are now charged with high-colesterol permissive inactive coercion.

You shouldn't believe everything you hear. Just don't become a TV amoeba.

Avocado with cheese and bacon? Hell yeah.

Furious HP staff stage protest over job cuts

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Holmes

"that's just corporate greed and some sleazy white collars trying to save their HUGE bonuses"

On the other hand, it just means that macro-economically, resources are being shifted elsewhere, from black/beige/silver box production to whatever.... definitely hellfire missiles and lovingly grilled children as there will be tax-and-spend thing going on. Or maybe ....

**OPENINGS IN McMANSION POOL MAINTENANCE!**

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Holmes

Marx was wrong

The "owners of capital" don't dictate anything [they try hard and succeed though - by the use of trade barriers, subsidies, taxes, IP legislation, and "friendly" congressmen, all things that should get the baby seal treatment when the revolution comes], but ultimately, it's the consumer that dictates. A factory owner can only produce the stuff that people *actually want*.

'Silent majority' is content with elderly Java, says startup

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Holmes

What?

Grails works for me.

Homeland Security bungles 'pre-crime' tech test docs

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Big Brother

Probably usable to sniff out females that feel a bit ... hot

1) Change algorithm

2) BEEP BEEP BEEP

3) "Young lady, would you step this way, please? Yes, that room over there."

4) ???

5) PROFIT!

Geek girls lauded on Ada Lovelace Day

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From the amazing steampunk "The Difference Engine"...

"The Gaming Lady is bad luck to those that know her. When a poor night at the wagering machines has emptied her purse, her jewels are carried privately into Lombard Street, and Fortune is tempted yet again with a sum from my lady's pawnbroker! Then she sells off her wardrobe as well, to the grief of her maids; stretches her credit amongst those she deals with, pawns her honor to her intimates, in vain hope to recover her losses!

"The passions suffer no less by this gaming-fever than the understanding and the imagination. What vivid, unnatural hope and fear, joy and anger, sorrow and discontent, burst out all at once upon a roll of the dice, a turn of the card, a run of the shining gurneys! Who can consider without indignation that all those womanly affections, which should have been consecrated to children and husband, are thus vilely prostituted and thrown away. I cannot but be grieved when I see the Gaming Lady fretting and bleeding inwardly from such evil and unworthy obsessions; when I behold the face of an angel agitated by the heart of a fury!

"It is divinely ordered that almost everything which corrupts the soul, must also decay the body. Hollow eyes, haggard looks, and pale complexion are the natural indications of a female gamester. Her morning sleeps cannot repair her sordid midnight watchings. I have looked long and hard upon the face of the Gaming Lady. Yes, I have watched her well. I have seen her earned off half-dead from Crockford's gambling-hell, at two o'clock in the morning, looking like a specter amid a flare of wicked gas-lamps --

"Pray resume your seat, sir. You are in the House of God. Is that remark to be taken as a threat, sir? How dare you. These are dark times, grave times indeed! I tell you, sir, as I tell this congregation, as I will tell all the world, that I have seen her, I have witnessed your Queen of Engines at her vile dissipations --

"Help me! Stop him! Stop him! Oh dear Jesus, I am shot! I am undone! Murder! Can none of you stop him?"

Microsoft gets trademark for retail store plans

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Windows

Once again!

It's a "trademark" people.

It's NOT about copyrights.

It's NOT about patents.

It's a unique design on how a Microsoft Store is supposed to look. I guess, a 1998's website in comic sans, blinking gifs and gaudy colours might not have been unique enough.

Chaos feared after Unix time-zone database is nuked

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Meh

There is no "theft" in this case, Stevie.

Slavery is not Freedom.

War is not Peace.

Intellectual Property is not a Thing. And cannot be "stolen".

The juxtaposition of "stealing" and so-called "Intellectual Property" mainly proves the utter confusion and retardation of the person who uses it.

Except when he is an "intellectual property" lawyer because then at least he knows how is bread is buttered.

You could argue about breaking a licence or something but even that is debatable.

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WTF?

“A good complaint would answer these questions.”

Gee you think?

This is not patent law and thus somewhat useful and restricted in scope (doesn't mean I have my doubt about its actual societal usefulness though.)

I predict this list will be back in a week.

Gay-bashing cult plans picket of Steve Jobs funeral

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Devil

Hmmmm.....

Please God, open a Portal and drop these disgusting retards into the middle of a Wahabbi meeting somewhere in a lovely western Iraq desert city. There would be a possibility to agree on that "fags" stance but otherwise the belief systems would collide with hilarious results!

Can general relativity explain the OPERA neutrino result?

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"explaining how particles with an apparent non-zero rest mass travel at or very near the speed of light"

I don't see why this is a problem. With small rest mass and high kinetic energy, the only thing that goes to c is v.

Attack on Apache server exposes firewalls, routers and more

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Mushroom

What's in a word?

"unauthorized access to a highly sensitive DMZ, or 'demilitarized zone' resources inside an organization"

That's why the term "demilitarized zone" is dangerous - people let it all hang out on that little perimeter network. Militarize that DMZ now - passwords, encryption, intrusion detection, all of it.

Mobile industry fights San Fran 'carcinogen' labelling

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Paris Hilton

UuuOohhhh!

"bright red, orange, and yellow circles emanating from [X] and penetrating into the head and pelvic regions of users"

Not having seen the "fact sheet", I am thinking that this is a good label for porn sites.

Judge cracks down on Bayesian stats dodginess in court

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FAIL

Bring in the witch!

"A judge in a (sadly unnamed) British case has decided that Bayes' Theorem - a formula used in court to calculate the odds of whodunnit - shouldn't be used in criminal trials."

This makes me feel queasy.

I don't see how going back to fuddy-duddy reasoning and Bushian "gut feeling" is going to help.

Next: "A judge in has decided that Aristotelean logic - a formula used in court to decide whether a defendant belongs to a given set - shouldn't be used in criminal trials."

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Stop

> you have to think in terms of which is more likely - double murder or double cot death

That sounds fishy.

This would mean your sample space is the space of "two dead people in a row". This doesn't sound well-defined. Those two dead people - are they grouped according to the same court case? Did they die in the same house? Of the same murder weapon? Did they have the same age? Doesn't really make sense.

The question is "what is the probability of double baby death by natural causes given that there is no other indication of foul play like baby skewered by a fork".

Your sample space is the set of families in which at least one baby died of apparent natural causes that look like cot death.

Turns out that in that set, a family has a high probability of seeing another cot death.

NASA to recruit fresh batch of astronauts

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Meh

"extensive experience flying high-performance jet aircraft"

I hope these bureaucrats stop watching Battlestar Galactica.

How about extensive experience evading cosmic radiation? That would be more useful.

Accelerating universe expansion discovery snags Nobel Prize

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"What if the universe isn't homogenous"

The problem is, we will never know.

Oracle previews Solaris 11, due in November

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Holmes

Meh²

Larry dear will only "beat x86/64 to death" outside of the announcarhea arena if there is commodity hardware that runs better, cheaper or greener than current hardware - with the same software (i.e. Microsoft OS) on top. This means emulation. Which ain't gonna happen soon.

x86/64, like the nanny state, is here to stay.

Tuesday's iPhone event more than Apple.com can bear

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Paris Hilton

Why u shave balls?

This isn't Oktoberfest!

Put down the Java manual

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Facepalm

"since you can learn Java on a $200 sub-notebook there isn’t much in the way"

This is about as relevant as affirming that you can lean Quantum Field Theory using a USD 100 telephone sized textbook.

Yes you can.

Just need some time.

And even after that, you may still be lousy.

Wait up, I gotta make the office tour, see what the guys have coded up NOW... FFS!!

Ten reasons why you shouldn't buy an iPhone 5

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Trollface

This gives a new meaning to "too long; didn't read"

Core facts: Windows 8 truthiness dissected, Mango sliced

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WTF?

Why are schizophrenics in need of medication posting here?

Do hospitals waiting rooms have internet access?

Oracle: Java 8 will be revolution, not evolution

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Mushroom

FUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!

“Some would say adding Lambda expressions is just to keep up with the cool kids, and there’s some truth in that”

What's this?

Lambda expression should be pack & parcel of any programming language that prides itself on being relevant and high-level.

Get with the program.

Once you feel the expressiveness you won't go back.

Check your machines for malware, Linux developers told

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"The lack of information on this flaw in Linux is beginning to look very shabby indeed. It's an open source OS, everyone out there should be able to examine the code for the flaw. Looks like the only person who did was the attacker."

You are implying that there is some new trick going here.

Might just have been an old trick, judiciously applied.

Best skiing in space is on Saturnian ice moon Enceladus

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Devil

But is it water ice?

If nitrogen it might work.

Just don't fall, the explosion caused by the waste heat of your suit would take your head off etc...

Samsung offers Apple TOP-SECRET peace deal in Australia

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WTF?

But crippled HOW?

Are the corners now "less rounded"?

Is the shiny "less shiny"?

Is the black "less black"?

Is the Samsung logo "less fruity"?

patent_attorney_with_patent_office_tax_feeder_in_pimped_Panzer_Cayenne.jpg

Adobe: crashing 100 million machines not an option

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Trollface

Of course, it's the OS that displays the "blue screen", not the computer.

(with GlaDOS being one of those; I'm still partial to the BLINKING RED Guru Meditation)

Pandemonium as Microsoft AV nukes Chrome browser

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Angel

Just as Planned!

Also, WHO are these "long-time chrome users"??

Euro beaks mull copyright of software features

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Mushroom

I want names and addresses please!

I will furnish the nailbat and my holiday time.

Apple victorious: Courts deny hackintosher's final plea

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Black Helicopters

I have it from good sources that it is the JUICE - an acronym for Joint Undertaking Intent on Cupertino Eradication.

Microsoft's Android patent ransom to 'total $444m' next year

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Well...

Actually you need to hire the government and its army of tax feeders to make the patents stick.

So "weak central government" would actually be a plus. Actually it's a plus in any case.

Apotheker severance outrage: $2.4m 'bonus'

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Devil

After Appie's service outage, will Meggie be better?

Gotta say that I would not entirely trust somebody who supports republican Palpatine impersonators and is on an ego trip so hard that she shells out a few tens of millions to make a bid for public office in California, a hive of scum and villany.

That's not a businessperson. That's someone in need of a pharmacist.

But the Apotheker has just left the building. Ha. Ha. Ha.

Logitech fined for bogus bug-busting keyboard ad

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Devil

So why don't they go up against Obamacare?

On another note, I can safely claim that adding some Cobalt 60 to the keyboard plastics is guaranteed to decrease the presence of fungi and microbes.

Cobalt 60 - go with the glow [tm]!

Googorola deal stalled by Feds

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FAIL

It's good to hear

...that at least Federal Employees have good job security and take their time wanking, eating donuts and discussing leisurly what private companies are and are not to do.

Keep it up.

HP recruits Goldman Sachs to grapple activist investors

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Holmes

Oh no! Company owners want to do the ownership thing!

I don't know whether this article correctly distinguishes between "activist investors" (uppity owners - good) or "corporate raiders" (prospective owners -- not good : rips company apart or good : unlocks value hidden by bad boardroom decisions depending on how you look at it).

China's patent EXPLOSION could leave West behind

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Trollface

You want patent protection and strong, monetarized "Intellectual Property?"

Be careful what you wish for, western devils.

US tops the class in IT competitiveness

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FAIL

Oh, it's the BSA...

The probability of a disgorgment of "Intellectual Property" moanings and jeremiads is pretty high. About as high as Panetta finding that decreasing the increase in military spending will cause doom for the US.

"China's advance has been slowed because of a lack of intellectual property protection"

Ok here we go.

"It is also clear that no country holds a monopoly in information technology"

But you are working on it, Cartellmeisters.

Drinking alcohol wards off asthma

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Pint

unforschunatly...

then youll jet arrested.. awww shucks

Google unfurls Dead Sea Scrolls

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Black Helicopters

Second impact can't be far.

Oh yeah, it's for 2012, right? Comet Elenin and all that.

NASA to trial laser-powered space broadband

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Holmes

But!

AE35 controlled a radio dish. Not a comm laser.

Comm laser were in Larry Niven's writing, IIRC.

Red Hat engineer renews attack on Windows 8-certified secure boot

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Mushroom

Unfortunately, the move towards that is still on.

And all because "the human rights of the creative people must not be violated, oh no" or some stupid, retarded self-serving crap like that.

Missing moon rock found among Clinton's knickknacks

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Holmes

Actually...

This is true. I remember that when President Clinton had to vacate the White House, quite a lot of stuff was "liberated" from the mansion.

Coz this doesn't beat Cheney taking the Vice Presidential papers with him and burying them in his private home.

Tokyo trains get lightsabre handrails

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Use a blaster!

These are uncivilized times, so you know what to do.

Faster-than-light back with surprising CERN discovery

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Meh

Dude.

There ain't no Physics based on QM without Special Relativity.

Nada. Zilch.

What do you think the Dirac Equation is good for?

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Thumb Up

That's a pretty good attack on crappy science writing right there.

So, we have neutrinos with imaginary mass? Which brings to mind a 15 year old paper about how that might have been a possibility with the neutrino bursts from that supernova in one of the Magellanic Clouds arriving faster than expected, so this is not completely, only somewhat unexpected.

But doesn't that mean that the future is written in stone, immutable and the whole universe a timeless brick? That would mean Einstein wins in the end, because isn't that what is required to make General Relativity stay consistent? At least it would focus efforts on getting the free t variable out of Quantum Mechanics. NYAH!

The splattering you hear is "free will" philosophers brutally decelerating after they jumped out of their armchairs and through windows.

Still, my bet is that error bars will just get larger, killing off this particular weirdness.

CERN's boson hunters tackle big data bug infestation

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Holmes

Don't tell them though.

You don't want a flustered Doc Brown after you. A double PhD has its prerogatives.

It gets even weirder when you find scientists doing Network Maintenance and Security on the side.

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Trollface

Why yes, there is!

The Standard Model Higgs (and indeed, there are others, like Supersymmetric Higgs) is just a mathematical consequence of the Standard Model. We know the latter is not a 100% correct description of physics, so it might well prove to have a hole where the Higgs should be.

Indeed, by end of the year there might well be enough data to exclude the Standard Model Higgs "at 95% confidence level". That would make things interesting.

More here: http://www.math.columbia.edu/~woit/wordpress/?p=3960

Web surfers stumble upon new planets

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Facepalm

Dontcha hate George-Lucas-Level inconsistency in scientists?

Astrophysicist Kevin Schawinski:

"a computer can only look for what you teach it to look for".

"We've essentially built the world's largest distributed supercomputer, dedicated to pattern recognition. We've linked up over 300,000 human brains and turned it into a science machine."

Midiclorians I say.

Google cleared in ad keyword-squatting court case

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Holmes

Stop Press: Court not considering people idiots in need of pampering by elites!

"The remarkable observation that people are probably smart enough to distinguish between organic search and advertising links, even if the latter are ambiguously labeled."

Holy shit, Batman, smart and media-savvy people on my Internets?

Still, it's qualified by "probably" and "remarkably", so default assumption are still being held, unremarkably.

Georgia Parole Board blocks Amnesty email campaign

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Big Brother

"In fact, the US Gov doesn't really even care what Obama thinks."

I think you underestimate the appeal of the Dark Side.