* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

15233 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

Passengers ride free on SF Muni subway after ransomware infects network, demands $73k

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Sign of the times

An entire mass transit system's IT gets badly mauled for money and the headline here is "Woot - free travel".

Better than the headline "An entire mass transit system's IT gets badly mauled for money and the headline here is "Passengers forced to walk because administration says nobody rides for free".

11
0

Geo-boffins say 'quake lifted bits of New Zealand by 8 metres, moved at 3km/second

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

For some reason the Reg Videos still don't ply in my Firefox, here's stuff on YouTube:

Papatea Fault and Raised Coast - So long and thanks for all the fish!

Farm track ruptured by fault (if a cow has the disadvantage of being on the fault line at time zero, does she get catapulted, Monty Python style?)

House displaced by fault rupture with Will Ries doing SCIENCE!

Drone video of the Kekerengu Fault rupture.

Also: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mizsfXP_I1w RUPTLY filming from a helo (now that WaPo has declared that RUPLY is a Putin's Propaganda Outlet out to Influence American Voters, maybe one should not watch this - still, those tunnels look unsafe!)

4
0

'Data saturation' helped to crash the Schiaparelli Mars probe

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Why does this happen?

Yep, better hire jonfr, he gonna fix da problems and bring lot of experience in space matters.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Seems like the system could have been a little more roboust

Drum timers: Will survive axially-placed gamma-ray bursts in your galaxy. 100% guaranteed!

Galactic Equip-R-Us. Call now by Ansible!

2
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Windows

Re: Welcome to embedded system engineering

From: http://www.nytimes.com/1985/06/20/us/laser-test-fails-to-strike-mirror-in-space-shuttle.html

"Several critics quickly cited the failure as evidence of bigger problems to come. They said this mistake, a simple human error capable of upsetting a complex technological effort, was the type that could be the ultimate undoing of the proposed antimissile shield."

Yeah, I remember when the news was that one could get a functional SDI infrastructure for, like, 1 trillion dollar. Which is, what, 1/42th of the national debt now (or 1/200th by some reckonings)? And the only thing that does even work 30+ years later is anti-Iranian missile bases in Romania (more like first-strike caps on Russia, amIrite?)

The retardation and belief in technological marvels was just amazing.

5
3
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Alien

Re: Sci-Fi Story

Nah, I would redo the ending with humanity having been taken over and euthanised by an evil collusion of pseudo-intelligent talkbots descended from Siri, Tay, Ms. Baidu et al. and badly programmed, insecure IoT devices.

These proceed to kick the Alien's arse fiercely because, well, they are soulless killer zombie bots from hell.

In the final scene, Clippy appears on the beleaguered Alien's Mothership Main Screen and goes: "Ding Ding! You seem to be trying to develop automatics. Do you want a little help?". Then everything is blown away.

THE END!

9
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Welcome to embedded system engineering

I'm not sure that there's any reason deploying parachutes at a negative altitude.

NEVER SURRENDER!

20
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Windows

Re: Its called Failure Modes and Effects Analysis....

As I recall, FMEA and/or FMECA or similar analysis are required on any spacegoing systems at ESA, you can be sure this wasn't dropped on the floor.

Now, according to Jimbo's Patent Entry On Fault Tree Analysis, FMEA is a bit problematic?

Early in the Apollo project the question was asked about the probability of successfully sending astronauts to the moon and returning them safely to Earth. A risk, or reliability, calculation of some sort was performed and the result was a mission success probability that was unacceptably low. This result discouraged NASA from further quantitative risk or reliability analysis until after the Challenger accident in 1986. Instead, NASA decided to rely on the use of failure modes and effects analysis (FMEA) and other qualitative methods for system safety assessments. After the Challenger accident, the importance of PRA (Probabilistic Risk Assessment) and FTA (Fault Tree Analysis) in systems risk and reliability analysis was realized and its use at NASA has begun to grow and now FTA is considered as one of the most important system reliability and safety analysis techniques.

Within the nuclear power industry, the U.S. Nuclear Regulatory Commission began using PRA methods including FTA in 1975, and significantly expanded PRA research following the 1979 incident at Three Mile Island. This eventually led to the 1981 publication of the NRC Fault Tree Handbook NUREG–0492, and mandatory use of PRA under the NRC's regulatory authority.

NUREG-0492 (from 1981, 209 pages) can be obtained from yonder page or apparently for ~12 Brexit Pounds from amazon.co.uk (someone at amazon.com sells it for USD $183.38 wut?). It's very readable.

6
0

Turing, Hauser, Sinclair – haunt computing's Cambridge A-team stamping ground

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

But did Newton die and then get reanimated at the end of "The System of the World"?

0
0

Airbus flies new plane for the first time

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

The last line of Animal Farm was about Stalinism, not flyover country.

(Which are just being talked about when someone needs voters for some establishment harpie or bodies for some war in foreign lands, otherwise being the butt of "liberal" disdain, it's just sad)

0
0

Poison .JPG spreading ransomware through Facebook Messenger

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: I question this statement

"Hypervigilance" is actually a psychological condition linked to PTSD and demands a period of psych healing.

Probably NOT what we are talking about here, which is likely to just be "only one donut in the morning"

8
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Windows

Hear, Hear!

"Checkpoint's chaps says the attack is useful because Facebook is a trusted asset."

Nasty commentard-baiting there, El Reg.

We are starting to wise up to your tricks!!

12
0

Big Music goes mad for chat bots and AI

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Terminator

Re: "Most chatbots aren’t really artificial intelligence"

All chatbots are really artificial nontelligence!

We are going where Neal Stephenson writes about (here is him clearly having learnt from Stanislaw Lem, writing in "Anathem"):

“Early in the Reticulum-thousands of years ago-it became almost useless because it was cluttered with faulty, obsolete, or downright misleading information,” Sammann said.

“Crap, you once called it,” I reminded him.

“Yes-a technical term. So crap filtering became important. Businesses were built around it. Some of those businesses came up with a clever plan to make more money: they poisoned the well. They began to put crap on the Reticulum deliberately, forcing people to use their products to filter that crap back out. They created syndevs whose sole purpose was to spew crap into the Reticulum. But it had to be good crap.”

“What is good crap?” Arsibalt asked in a politely incredulous tone.

“Well, bad crap would be an unformatted document consisting of random letters. Good crap would be a beautifully typeset, well-written document that contained a hundred correct, verifiable sentences and one that was subtly false. It’s a lot harder to generate good crap. At first they had to hire humans to churn it out. They mostly did it by taking legitimate documents and inserting errors-swapping one name for another, say. But it didn’t really take off until the military got interested.”

“As a tactic for planting misinformation in the enemy’s reticules, you mean,” Osa said. “This I know about. You are referring to the Artificial Inanity programs of the mid-First Millennium A.R.”

“Exactly!” Sammann said. “Artificial Inanity systems of enormous sophistication and power were built for exactly the purpose Fraa Osa has mentioned. In no time at all, the praxis leaked to the commercial sector and spread to the Rampant Orphan Botnet Ecologies. Never mind. The point is that there was a sort of Dark Age on the Reticulum that lasted until my Ita forerunners were able to bring matters in hand.”

Also ... that shutterstock photo!

"skeptical_hipster_with_phone.jpg"

Looks more like

"captain_nemo_slightly_disgusted_texting.jpg"

1
0

CERT tells Microsoft to keep EMET alive because it's better than Win 10's own security

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Not secure

Where does one get a license to build a castle??

1
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: The Big Question

Windows 10 includes all of the mitigation features that EMET administrators have come to rely on

So CERT knows nothing and that table is faux facts?

I hope this post isn't coming from the MS Hasbara operations down in Bangalore or wherever.

5
0

Not fake news: Facebook reinvents SVG

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: "native platforms desperately need to involve animators "

But it will be an emotional Clippy.

OTOH, I'm sure animations can be put to good use on UIs for things less inane.

1
0

Pre-Trump FCC – get a grip on mobe data caps, racist Stingray spying, urge Dem senators

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Holmes

"Changes before January"

Eight years of Obamashit (including finding Hitler and "red lines" in faraway lines that have nothing to do with Amuricca) and now we are in a hurry all of a sudden.

I have the burning sense of HATE, just HATE in the spirit of "I have no mouth but I must scream". I actually get the post-Weimar-Republic spirit all of a sudden.

Also: Commander-In-Chief Donald Trump Will Have Terrifying Powers. Thanks, Obama.

5
5

Veeam kicks Symantec's ass over unpatentable patents

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Alien

Patents for retards by retards granted by more retards.

It's also Symantec, one of the prime reasons why Aliens politely decline to contact Earth people.

7
0

International Space Station celebrates 18th birthday in true style – by setting trash on fire

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: velocity and space

The main criterium is "same orbital plane", because changing that takes lots of propellant.

I don't know the mechanics but I imagine that getting "some orbital plane" may well mean the ISS is wherever at launch time.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

our greatest fear and unknown is still fire?

The fact that one is living inside an environment containing a fierce oxydizer in gaseous form is not often appreciated!

0
0

Hackers electrocute selves in quest to turn secure doors inside out

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Bah!

You can put it down to UFOs.

0
0

Arista cats escape US quarantine, for now: Customs says it's OK to import networking gear

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

"Ripped off the command line"

So... design patents? Rounded corners and everything?

2
0

Put down the org chart, snowflake: Why largile's for management crybabies

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Heretic Alert.

Hadoop is not a DBMS.

Neither is MongoDB for that matter.

3
3

Linux 4.9 has 'issues that just shouldn't be issues'. Or might not

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Obligatory

In a superposition of worried and not worried? So this release will be "Schrödinger's Penguin".

27
0

NASA trying to rein in next-generation super-heavy lifter costs

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Megaphone

LETTER TO TRUMP

1) Dismantle NATO

2) No more boot-licking by trough-friendly Europeans eager to follow the US lead on "confronting Russia", "protecting Lybian women from rape", "Assad must go'" and "securing Afghanistan for the Taliban" and maybe soon "keeping Georgia free" and "making the free Republic of Molodova safe for pipelines"

3) Reallocate money to productive uses

4) Maybe it will work

3
16

Hacker dishes advanced phishing kit to hook clever staff in 10 mins

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

I don't understand

...how this toolkit is going to improve security in any way?

Is KiwiCon now Blackhat Con?

2
1

Why I just bought a MacBook Air instead of the new Pro

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Apple n' Scientology

Whatever, but it needs to go to shit pretty quickly so that we can have acceptable machines back.

OTOH, the last acceptable machine from Apple that I eyed was a NeXT Cube.

1
1

Hyperloop One settles hangman lawsuit

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Dodged a bullet.

"Grogan Bam! Grogan"

Good that wasn't considered.

2
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Maybe "just enough rope"

2
0

Customer data security is our highest priori- ha ha ha whatever, suckers

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: Company law

It is the duty of the Directors to maximise returns for the shareholders

No it is not, any anyone who thinks so has no idea how companies operate.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: The seventies version of the future was so much cooler ...

> check this out

Rodenberry must have watched this.

The rampant germanization of the universe by personnel previously manning Panzers, but now a bit more corpulent and starting to resemble bureaucrats sure has its charms! But why are they all the time talking in Combat Language?

Go Perry Rhodan etc.

1
0

Antivirus tools are a useless box-ticking exercise says Google security chap

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: This has been said many times before...

So personal computing is like doing tightrope walking?

IT SHOULDN'T BE AND YOU SHOULD DEMAND THAT IT NOT BE!

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Until the world all has a working OS and well designed software...

Self-managing teams of skilled people FTW!

So different from downtrodden, report-filling office drones that can't even get the resources or time they need for the task.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Whitelists?

ENOUGH!

You know how to get to Portland for a protest meetup with the other liberal arts students and state dripfeed survivors.

0
3
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: About time

And I haven't seen (other people's) AV catch a single genuine threat the whole time.

I call rank bullshit!!!

AV may not be the solution to everything and there sure are threats slipping through, but given the current paltry state of the "industry" (more like a bunch of idiot people that should be Godwin'd by fast track to terminal reeducation camps and that really should have decided to start a career in creative fantasy writing or "modern" painting instead of going into IT) they take on the role of necessary seat belts. Won't protect from a car mugging or an encounter with a trucvk, but protects against the usual vagaries (and I get warning about these in my mailbox every week as someone has again decided to CLICK ON SOMETHING!!)

2
0

Surveillance camera compromised in 98 seconds

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Yay for the apocalypse!

Toasters taking over?

There must be something by Philip K. Dick on this.

4
0

Experts to Congress: You must act on IoT security. Congress: Encourage industry to develop best practices, you say?

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Lame Duck Congress

The first amendment currently only applies to Christian fundamentalists. Everyone else is a third class citizen.

Stop reading left-wing fanzines, you!

0
0

AI gives porn peddlers a helping hand

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: And in other news

I dunno the pr0nz are always well-stocked on beautiful ladies?

1
0

Hackers' modular worm builder hoses popular team web chat apps

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: "former college Matt Bryant,"

and former colleague Matt Bryant

Any relationship to esteemed fellow commentard and professional Solaris-hater Matt Bryant?

1
0

Helping autonomous vehicles and humans share the road

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Holmes

Ancient cant by people with difficulties distinguishing levels of abstraction

(Under "people with difficulties distinguishing levels of abstraction" we find anyone who whips out something that he misunderstood being said by Gödel to make a point about what computers can or cannot do for example. Quite a few critics of AI are in this category...)

Computers like rules – solid, hard-and-fast instructions to follow. How should we program them to handle difficult situations?

Computer like nothing. They just execute stuff, in fact anything that is considered "computable".

HUMANS like rules - solid, hard-and-fast instructions to be followed by a computer - because they have major difficulty conceptualizing, designing and debugging anything that is fluid, context-dependent and works with tons of heuristics to attack a problem in restricted, hard timeframes.

7
0

KCL staff offered emotional support, clergy chat to help get over data loss

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Unless, of course...there's...

Like suicide interdiction devices?

2
0

PoisonTap fools your PC into thinking the whole internet lives in an rPi

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Whole Internet in a small box.

"Bigger on the Inside"

The Box of Leaves.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: This is exactly how things are designed to work

I really fail to understand how this is news: this is how things are designed to work

Yeah, well maybe they should stop working that way, mon.

"We have always been falling downstairs around here, what's to change?"

3
1
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Physical Access...

your attack timeframe would be the time you can leave the device attached to the machine without being noticed. I'd say a couple MONTHS at best.

FTFY

If you put an official-looking sticker on it saying "do not remove because BLAH", maybe a couple of years.

2
0

Gone in 70 seconds: Holding Enter key can smash through defense

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Black Helicopters

After vigorous "research" I have been able to trace this bug back to Thompson & Richie Unix.

WERE THEY SECRETLY WORKING FOR THE NSA ALL ALONG? WHAT DID RUBY ACTUALLY KNOW AND WHY IS OSWALD EVEN BEING MENTIONED IN THIS POST?

Shocking deathbed testimony from a hacker dying of a mysterious cancer he obtained from a fishy sushi in an unnamed London restaurant rips the veil off the long-running UNIX conspiracy!!

(After this message)

1
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Gone in 10 seconds...

However in a kiosk situation, you might have to type the entire kernel in by hand at the keyboard :-)

HACKED BY SEYMOUR CRAY!

1
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Now what if you don't use initramfs…

LUKS has nothing to do with it. It's only responsible for the layout/conventions of the crypto stuff on the drive.

0
0
Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge
Windows

PS Vote thumbs down if you have a pony tail!

Dude! How are you bell bottom trousers? Got a boombox to go with it?

The last ponytail I saw was attached to a very aged guy re-entering computer science at uni and desperately trying to navigate the Macintosh 1. That was in 1990.

Obviously my category of "very aged" has changed since.

0
0

Elon Musk wants to launch 4,000 satellites and smother globe with net connectivity

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Musk tried to suggest that someone had fired a shot at the rocket to sabotage it

Amendments should be "put on fire"

0
0

Hadoop experiencing growing pains in lamestream businesses

Destroy All Monsters
Silver badge

Re: Translation please

Data > Information > Knowledge > Wisdom (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DIKW_pyramid)

This is of course bullshit as this alignment-that-is-pleasing-to-the-eye-but-devoid-of-meaning relies on deformed and pared down interpretations of the words, and the illusion that there is some sort of progression from left to right. It should go back to the marketing sewer from where it came.

Here's a better kickoff point: Towards a Theory of Information - Information: Mystical Fluid or a Subject of Scientific Enquiry? (R.K. Stamper)

Also... Who the Feck actually needs Hadoop except startups trying to marketize it and HPC shops?

1
0

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017