* Posts by Khaptain

3254 posts • joined 4 May 2008

It's official: The iPhone 5S bling-mobe IS chavvy. OR, Burberry isn't

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Crap clothes + crap cameras = crap photos

They don't want to lose the Chavness

Torvalds: 'We're not doing Linux95 … for a few years, at least'

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Re: "Suicidal squirrel”

LOL, I wonder how many El Reg readers even know what the Tufty club is, that's made my day...

Push mail outfit Good Tech wins CC cert

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Keyholder information please

And who holds the encryption keys ?

Does any of the data "pass thru" any of the Merican servers at any time ?

Maybe instead of backdoors we should now talk about Prism Keys.....

French ministers told to use only secure comms post-PRISM

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Re: France and secure communication

Cligg you should have added that all content is written in "Verla".( Not sure how to spell that word please read on to understand why)

For the unwashed masses : Verlan is a technique in which the french reverse all of the sylables in a word.

The word Verlan is actually the word " l'enver " in reverse = "len" + "ver" = "ver" + len" = "verlan" ( Yes they do change some of the spelling as well but it iis more of a verbal thing than a written one.

The word "l'enver " actualy means Reverse or Backwards.... All very clever really.

"Et les keufs et les meufs dans le RER, la banlieue c’est pas rose"

Lip-wobbling boffins: Eating Chinese food is like kissing a vibrator

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Housewifes dream

AstroGlide and Szechuan pepper

iPhone 5S: Apple, you're BORING us to DEATH (And you too, Samsung)

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Peak Smartphone

I think the problem lies in the fact that we really do not need smartphones. They are esentially gadgets which have come from a Geeks Only status to a General Public status. SmartPhones are becoming passé.

We have essentially learned what they are usefull for and also what they are not usefull for. Their evolution is reaching it end.

Ones phone/smartphone was once a "symbolic icon" for who er are/who we pretend or aspire to be, today it's just another gadget in our pockets. It's all become very bling bling.....( talking mass market here, not professional usage)

We now need something radically different,....

We need a new form of entertainment, clothes that can talk, or bicycles that can sing, personal hologram devices( 3d Tamagotchis) . etc etc etc .

Now that we are at the end of the wave a new one will come along, for the life of me though I cannot imagine what it will be.

'NSA PRISM spies' shake down victims with bogus child-abuse vids claims

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Re: NSA?

No it can't be because most crooks have a code of honour, whoever runs the NSA has no scruples whatsover.

Top UK billionaires considerably richer than Chinese ones ... for now

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Re: British billionaires

Not forgetting what the proverb states about what comes before a fall.......

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: British or not British

I would argue that it is necessary to give a new name after every three 0s. In the same manner as a we have in IT Mega, Giga, Terra, Peta, Exa etc ....

I think is easier to think in terms of "2.7 Giga" than it is to think about "two thousand seven hundred Megas", or worse, "two thousand seven hundred million bytes" or even worse "twenty one thousand six hundred million bits". And this is only at the Gigabyte level....( although that is roughly where the Billionaires are for the moment)

it is also far easier to write.....

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: The UK's main business now is banking.

Can we therefore presume that MPs accept cheaper backhanders in London than anywhere else. ....

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French Revolution N°2

What will we call it when the world's population has had enough of learning how rich the rich are ?

Steelie Neelie calls for TOTAL BAN on EU mobe roaming charges

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Why 2016 ? because that's how long it will take the main Operators to strike a price fixing deal together and also to invent some new scams. Maybe they will stop subsidising the telephones or find some way to create a "Media Tax"...

Microsoft delivers baker's dozen of patches on Tuesday

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Re: Installation nonsense

I find it far more amazing that they have never found a means of avoiding the "obligatory" reboot......

James Bond's Lotus Esprit submarine car sells for £550,000

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: This prop used to live ...

"One wonders at the mentality of the idiot purchasing the toy for that kind of green."

If I had that kind of money I wouldn't stop at the car, i would want a copy of Stromberg's Lair in The Spy Who Loved Me..

These are cult symbols, they belonged to every young boys dream, James Bond was a "National Hero", he exemplified a world of fantasy, of the superich, he glorified the Spy world and even the bad guys, he was a ladies man. He was/is a living myth.. Why would we not want to be part of that..

Lighten up Jake, you are allowed to have some fun too.

Google scrambles to block backdoors

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Re: Whose data is it?

Shit, I forgot about those damned cameras, OK stand outside of the internet cafe whilst wearing a tinfoil hat and rubber mask and don't speak to anyone..

Khaptain Silver badge
Black Helicopters

Re: Whose data is it?

One solution : ,Using a "friends" laptop, a USB version of Tails, connect to the Wifi of an internet café or Airport, encrypt your emails contents and then send using NymServers and Remailers.

Not a very comfortable solution but relatively secure. ( Don't use the same laptop or Internet cafe any more than twice in a year.)

Pair of complete tits sorry for pervy app

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Re: That's nature

<quote>It is that she would leave the conference thinking "Well that industry is clearly just a bunch of silly men obsessed with looking at women's bodies. Not for girls like me then. It kind of makes me feel uncomfortable." That is the tragedy. That's what *I* find offensive.</quote>

i would consider that as a purely "adult" frame of thought capable only from a mind mature enough to know what it was looking at. Not what I would expect from a pre-pubescent child, even one that was mentally capable of programming.

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: That's nature

As far as I remember tech is usually very clean, or would you like to brand everyone with the Shit Stick because a pair of minor technies had some fun.

Nobody takes these kinds of things seriously, they are intentionally made to be funny and made to be a little tongue in cheek.

Pray tell us how you protect that same little innoncent sweet 9 year from the Sex, Bad Language, Violence , Politics and general disarray that can be found on the Web, Movies, Television, Newspapers, on her iPhone/Android, splattered everwhere in publicity......

That same little girl will soon discover that their are far more things to be worried about that looking at a pair of clothed breasts.......

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: That's nature

You honestly want to be believe that taking a 9 year old girl to a tech conference will generate further interest in the tech field ? I am sure there are far more interesting things for 9 years olds to do than stand around bored shitless for hours waiting for an interesting field to crop up.

By the way the web has a very large percentage of hardcore/softcore pornography websites, written by the same techies..... You might want to consider that for later....

Think of the children, yeah right, don't take them to these kind of events. Whats next to much swearing in the football stands. Ballerinas whose clothing is too tight and show a little too much nipple at the ballet.

Khaptain Silver badge

Ornithologists Unite

This seems to be very unfair for those that love ogling at a pair of Great Tits or some Blue Tits in the winter time, or a pair of Coal Tits up in a the North of England.

Microsoft does a U-turn, releases Windows 8.1 to developers early after all

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Utter BS

"We've listened, we value your partnership, and we are adjusting based on your feedback." = Bollocks

If they had listed to what was being asked / complained about / offered as advice then we would not have the product that we have today.

If they had listened we would be reading about how great W8 is, unfortunately this is not the case. W8 definately has some goods elements, it's just that they are overshadowed by the bad ones.

Indian spooks snooping without ISP knowledge

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I get the impression that you actually believe that you live in a democratic society. The spooks have been doing it for years, this is certainely nothing new. ECHELON has been in use since around the 1960's, don't tell my you think they only spy on foreign nations.....

I do not agree with what the spooks are doing but I can understand why they might be doing it. They need to provide evidence/figures that prove they are doing something usefull....BIG DATA provides that evidence. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to put a little make-up around the stats...

I very much doubt that the real terrorists are using public networks anyway.... They know how to use encryption and TOR just like everyone else....

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Isn't that what spooks are supposed to do ?

BAN THIS SICK FILCH: Which? demands end to £1.50-per-min 'help' lines

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Re: @Tom Welsh - @Khaptain - France isn't too bad

As I mentioned above , it's all about attitude.

Although I have lived in France for almost 20 years, I also have a typically broad Scots Accent, so it is easy to imagine that my French is heavilly "tainted".

The French can be extremely rude though , especially to impolite people, they do it amongst themselves all the time. Believe it or not the most French are normally very polite.

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: France isn't too bad

@AC 08:40

You mean you are surprised to learn that when living in a foreign country not everyone speaks "English".

I have lived in France for almost 20 years and I have never had that kind of problem as soon as they realise that you try and make an effort they usually lighten up and help you out. If you come across as the snotty Englishman expecteing everyone to speak English then you deserve what you get.

I think it is more about attitude than it is about competence.

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: France isn't too bad


Now that is a new twist - charging you for assistance on a seperate bill. Free are not so Free after all.

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: France isn't too bad


At least you can complain, the alternative would be that they provide no complaints departments whatsover....

Khaptain Silver badge

France isn't too bad

Here in France you don't pay until you have a real person speaking to you on the other end. Companies are not allowed to charge during the obligatory Queue/Waiting Music period.

Which to me seems quite fair.

Peugeot 208 GTi: The original hot hatch makes a comeback

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Agreed, I had a Golf GTI at the time and my friend had the GT5, he could run rings around me. Far to powerfull in relation to its weight,road handlingm, chassis ( unless of course you know what you are doing which most don't)..... Roundabouts on a damp night in a GT5, oooooooohhhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuucccccckkkkkkkkk.....

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Might be for the Brits but on the continent PostCodes are far less precise. For example my postcode covers 7 different little villages..... So here it not even something that we ever be missed.

So it's only a fail for a small minority ie The Brits that drive the new 208 Gti.

Tor traffic torrent: It ain't the Syrians, it's the BOTS

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Re: Doesn't make sense.

You are right I didn't see that at all but now that you spell it out, it is very clear, my bad. ( Suddenly my

eyes open and I realise how blind I have been)......

The facepalm is for me ...

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Steve Dingledine Knox will then be forced to move into the Dark Dark Dark Dark Net where the Dingledine name is yet unheard of .......

If you ever are tempted over to the Dark Dark Dark Dark side and you see that Pseudo you can be pretty damned sure who is using it......

Khaptain Silver badge

Doesn't make sense.

Those that you the TOR are far more aware about computing than most people, It would be very surprising that those same people are infected by the various BOT malwares....

Those that are careful about hiding their identity or that keep a low profile are usually clever enough to keep their machines clean.....

BitTorrent rather than Botnet......is the likely cause

Scientists demo light-controlled semiconductor

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Usages ideas please

I will play the ignoramus and ask what usages can be forseen for which which we do not already have a solution. We already have light sensitive switches etc

I belong to the unwashed masses please enlighten me... ( I lack imagination too)

Put down the (cod)piece and step away: Artist cuffed after sculpture cockup

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I suppose that it gives another context to a gun being ""Fully loaded and cocked".

Second-gen Surface and Surface Pro rumored to be minor upgrades

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: which are expected to ship in the fall.

The Rev. Spooner sent a memo to Ballmer

"Unaccepted like shit in a pail."

LinkedIn looks at bank account, thinks: We'll raise one Instagram*

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Re: Genuine Question

Personally I do not have a Linked-in account, as mentioned above it's like facebook for suits.

What I do get though are regular emails from people who have Linked-in accounts and that must have my email address in their address book. I hate the bastards.....

For me Linked-in is on par with those that sell little blue pills.

MPs blocked from ogling 'web smut' 300,000 times – while in Parliament

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Re: Likely Cause

They also forgot to mention that these were only the figures for a Mr. D. Cameron's office.....

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: To be fair, if they're going to legislate on something, they should know something about it

Better brace yourself for a forced entry

What , forced entry, pre-trial , is that to prepare you for your first day in prison.

HDMI 2.0 spec arrives ... 1.0 years late

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Re: Cat 2 Cables

Is it any less forgivable than beginning a sentence with a lower case letter?

Barnes & Noble knock Nook slate down to £79

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Re: Limited Availablitiy

He might actually be confusing what "Slab" of liver actually means..

Slablet and onions, lovely.....

Furious Frenchies tell Apple to bubble off: Bling iPhone isn't 'champagne'

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Re: Méthode Champenoise

It depends on who you speak to.

In generale though, Blanc de Blancs is produced in the Champagne region. Blanc des blancs is a "champagne", that it to say that it is made in the Champagne region but it is made exclusively from Chardonnay grapes. ( no black grapes involved in the process).

The terme Méthode Champenoise would therefore probably be more correct than Méthode Traditionelle.

But it's only wafer thin: Skinniest keyboard EVER is designed by Camby biz

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Soemthing which I consider extremely import is the tactility of a keyboard. Keys that have no depth of travel, are too hard, too soft etc soon lose their desirability.

I understand these things from a portability point of view but from a practical, ergonomic point of view it changes the ball game. Latops are good but heavy/large....... Tablets are OK but it is difficult to do real work for any lenght of time.

Maybe what we need is an inflatable PC.....

Anatomy of a killer bug: How just 5 characters can murder iPhone, Mac apps

Khaptain Silver badge

Nice debuugger

I'm not a Mac owner or user so I don't have access to a Mac and I have no familiarity with coding/decoding tools but that debugger looks quite nice. In my time, oh so many years ago, I used Softice, which undoubtedly some of you know.

That's the first time that I have seen any reverse engineering for quite some years and it beings back some nice memories. All nighters trying to determine where program logic could be "modified" ever so slightly for a variety of reasons ;-) ;-) ;-)

Bionym bracelet promises to replace passwords with ECG biometrics

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: What exactly does it do?

I don't understand this either, this bracelet only generates One Password for everthing or does it generate different passwords for different programs. How is the username catered for , or multiple accounts , or password changes, or forgotten passwords, or hacked passwords etc....

Intel's new top-dog desktop 'Extreme' CPU fails to excite geekerati

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Moores law is in abeyance.

Agreed, I found the benefit of SSDs to make a huge difference in comparison to a processeur upgrade.

I would like the native Sata 6 Gbps and USB3 support though. ( Shame my Wifi can't be upgraded to match these kind of speeds though)...

Canon climbs atop Facebook with over-the-top pic wrangler

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: re. energy drinks

I am not sure they wom-bat an eyelid.

Cube computers come back with $US50 Android-or-Linux box

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Re: A link wouldn't have gone astray

In additions to Maganis link (which takes you to the parent website), here is another link directly to the Cubox website.

The 50$ dollar version is available on this one


The CuBox-i2Ultra at 94.99$ doesn't look too shabby.

China, India the key to Micr-okia's fate says IDC

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Re: Fix the email first

I'd say that the first mistake was keeping all your emails stored in the manner and I wouldn't expect my telephone to be capable of dealing with multi nested folders of anything. ( 2 or 3 levels is fine anything more becomes a pain in the arse because of the scrolling and selecting that is required). There comes a time when the nesting becomes so deep that it becomes difficult to extract anything easilly anyway.

I would say that you are trying to use the wrong tool to accomplish the task.

'Peeping while you're sleeping' NSA parody T-shirt ban BACKFIRES

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Sell through via Europe

Let me slightly correct that for you

Then again, they probably think copyright in the US is universal copyright, in the same way US law is universal law.

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