* Posts by Khaptain

3233 posts • joined 4 May 2008

Be prepared... to give heathens a badge: UK Scouts open doors to unbelievers

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It's a good start.

There are far many more things than just the Boy Scouts that need to get rid of the Sky Fairy idealogy but this is a good start.

Anyone that swears to a "deity" begins his career with a lie, why would we ever expect them to be honest from that point in.

All we need know is for the Americans to learn that creatonism is myth not fact. In parallel can we please offer the Pope a new job outside of the theater playing role that he currently has. ( The man himself, the Pope that is, is probably a fine human-being but please stop all of this funny hat and dress wearing nonsense - The 1600s are over).

Techies with Asperger's? Yes, we are a little different...

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Re: Nice read

I'd go as far as saying it probably represents 95% of the population.

Microsoft watches iPads flood into world's offices: Right, remote desktop clients. It's time

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Irony for the twunts.

Owning an iSomething whilst doing a Google search using IE9.....

Cook invokes GHOST of STEVE JOBS in Apple-wide memo

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From what can be gleaned from the interwebs and various other accounts, it would appear that not liking Steve was not a good career move if you were one of his subordinates.

Did you personally meet him ? Are all those accounts in the web wrong ? Was Steve Jobs really a philanthropist in disguise ?


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Re: @Khaptain

That's a worrying thought........

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Better the Devil you know

"He left behind a company that only he could have built and his spirit will forever be the foundation of Apple. We will continue to honour his memory by dedicating ourselves to the work he loved so much. There is no higher tribute to his memory. I know that he would be proud of all of you."

It sounds very much like Mr Cook is trying to keep his staff motivated and he is using "compassion" as the fuel. Pretty poor plot ......

"dedicating ourselves to the work he loved so much"

People go to work to earn money, not to idiolise or dedicate their lives others. ( Although that might actually be a requriement in NK) . Cook sounds like one of those crazy evangelists with very little, if anything, to offer, he must be in a permanent struggle to try and appear to be usefull.

Young? Been online five years? Congrats, you are the ELITE MINORITY

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El Reg Elite Minority

I have been signed up to El Reg for just a little more than 5 years... Does that make me an Elite Vulture ?

I have also been using the web for almost 20 years...... Does that make me an Elite Web Vulture ?

Some of these studies/reports make me weep. What's next, you have been driving for 5 years, you are the equivalant of Formula One pilot and you deserve medals....

DEATH WATCH counts down seconds to wearer's demise

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Complete Anarchy

I would hate to imagine the pyschological effect that such a watch might have. It is just as likely to start instilling nihilistic thoughts in peoples heads. When they have eventually reasoned deeply enough that life really does not have any purpose and all that remains left is too die they might just start behaving a little "crazilly"....

Eary thought....

Three BILLION people now potential nodes for the transfer of cat videos

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Surprised that the article didn't speak about IPV4 address space....3 Billion people, that only leaves 1 Billion address for industry...

And yet IPV6 still seems like it will be an eternity before it will become defacto for the unwashed masses.

Hollywood: How do we secure high-def 4K content? Easy. Just BRAND the pirates

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Re: @Khaptain @Trevor_Pott RE: "I hope they all get cholera."



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Re: Digital signature conundrum

If they are truly random pixels, they will be randomly scattered, but in known positions ( held within a secret database, woooooh), removing a few frames would then change the exact location of each pixel, the signatures pixels would then no longer exist at the known position.

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Re: @Trevor_Pott RE: "I hope they all get cholera."

Alternatively they could be made to sit in the same room as Trevor for a few days and made to discuss the varying potential of improving IO on eSata interfaces.

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Digital signature conundrum

Rather than removing the offending pixels, would it not be more advantageous to just add some extra pixels, thereby modifiying the signature. It would then become an unknown signature and not verifiable against one that already exists.

In a court I would imagine that something is either an exact match or it is not...

Police constable 1337 stunned by Lego lookalike

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Big Brother

Re: Amazing. Not.

"Still, it took up space in the the newspaper that would, otherwise, have been filled with bile against immigrants, benefits scroungers, gays, politicians, unions, corporations or 'celebrity gossip'."

Since when did the public at large require anything more ? The "Illiterati " are not allowed to rise above a level which would allow them to remain autonomous...

"There was a time when people used to talk about newspapers like this as only fit to wipe your bum. But I wouldn't want to risk it."

Rupert Murdoch made his fortune from selling toilet paper....

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Think about the copyright

Don't Playmobil have a copyright against this blatent copy of their character set.

It seems like one of the multiple "copyright defense" lawyers might actualy have a case here, now that would be interesting to follow.....

Oh, shoppin’ HELL: I’m in the supermarket of the DAMNED

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Re: Automated till hell ...

" C'mon, somebody round here is responsible for this! Own up, and accept the good kicking you deserve."

Have you considered the idea that it might have been the BOFH.

State-backed hackers: You think you're so mysterious, but you're really not – report

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Heartwarming article !!!

Yet another manifestation of mankind's capacity for destruction.

How to make a grey day even greyer by leading the unwashed masses even further down the path of fear.......

The LSD guru, the 1980s pop-star and video games to reprogram your brain

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Re: @Geoff Campbell (was: Computer games & drugs? Seriously?)

"My reality is my day-to-day life. And I'm pretty happy with it.

YMMV. Think about it."

Judging by the negative overtones that surface in most of your comments, that it quite difficult to believe.

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Re: @Geoff Campbell (was: Computer games & drugs? Seriously?)

I very much doubt that Jake's reality encompasses anything other than Jake.

London schoolboy cuffed for BIGGEST DDOS ATTACK IN HISTORY

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Re: @LarsG

Oh the irony of using Anonymous Coward whillst posting that remark........ Probably hoping that someone else gets the blame.......

30 years on: The day a computer glitch nearly caused World War III

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Re: Thought Experiments

"Why do people say 'use case' when they mean 'use'?"

You do know what a "use case " is ?

Boris Johnson's ex-right-hand man's right hand lands johnson in web slip

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New job required

Give the man a mac ( not the silicon kind), let him stand in front of parliament and offer sweeties to the Lords, Ladies and bottom feeders as they enter the Houses of Parliament.

Why was he taking pictures of his dick anyway ? Who was he intending to share them with......?

'Bet Lynch' types BANNED from zoo for upsetting not-so-wildlife

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Re: Perhaps it is just taste

I had to google what a Onesey is, I didn't even know that these things existed


Kinda sad really

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Aren't most animals coulour blind or have at least have very little sense of colour or pattern. I was under the presumption that their sight was used in particular for movement and shape ?

Example : Many hunters now sport bright orange and yellow clothing in order to be seen be other hunters and this has not affected in the slightest the kill ratio... When hunting that which is most important is not having any smell and keeping very still...

China's lifting of internet blockade denied by state media

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"There will be a strict crack down on any pornography, gambling, drugs or smuggling in the zone, it added, re-emphasising the point that the FTZ will not be allowed to function in a bubble, removed from the rest of China.".

Since they have also removed the Social Media websites and I can only presume that some of the news is filtered as well, what is actually left has no real value. Unless of course access to online forums discussing the merits of the communist regime are interesting to you...or online shopping.....

It's not really the internet when it's not open. Imagine reading a book where some of the words were missing...

PS : Brits please pay heed, it's a sign of what's coming to the island.

Surface Mini on shelves NEXT YEAR – and it will run Windows RT

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Re: Mini or Note, mini-note perhaps?

If it's a small tablet they could call it TaRT.

Elop's enlarged package claim was a cock-up, admits Nokia chairman

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Finbar Saunders must have written that title

See title ( Literally)

Dragons' Den star's biz Outsourcery sends yet more millions up in smoke

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5 : Then run away quickly or become the CEO of another company before the taxman comes a knocking.

6 : Goto step 1

Fan whips out own pair of iPhone 32Cs, 'unlocks' mobe using breasticle

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Re: Nipples are "like snowflakes",

.... Difficult to play with for any length of time

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Re: *holes

Let me guess , JDX just bought an iPhone 5S and was currently considering alternative security measures but now the plot has failed. .... The secret is out

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I wonder if they have tried using their arseholes yet, it would appear that there enough of them around.

Google tentacle slips over YouTube comments: Now YOUR MUM is at the top

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Re: You know

And which kind of poeple would that be then?

UK's Get Safe Online? 'No one cares' - run the blockbuster ads instead

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Re: Word of advice

"if they refrained from telling me how they were 'proudly' supporting some farcical football tournament"

Now you know why your interest rates are so low.

"I suppose they're hardly going to sponsor porn, though .."

Could be interesting:

The Royal Bank of Scotland proudly presents "Ana Lorgy", voted most promising Star for 2014. The jury was presided by Stephen Hester and Marc Dorcel.

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Word of advice

Dear Mr John Lyons,

It is my unfortunate task of having to inform you that it may be necasssary for you to change tactics. You have taken the approach that the majority possess at least some intelligence. Whilst this indeed is correct, I believe that you have misjudged the quantity of intelligence. It is far below that which you have aimed your campaign.

The internet for many people is a fun place; there is football, porn, fun little games and knitting patterns. There is also that tedious possibility of online banking which doesn't include any porn or fun things....

Online banking and such requires difficult to understand concepts about security, html, Cross Site Scripting , Java One Day exploits, script kiddies and a lot of other things that don't include porn or football etc...

The computer and the internet are like big mysterious black boxes that we can use to see more porn.... Everything else is difficult........

Cordially Yours

Apor Nuser.

Seriously though, most people do not have the slightest clue about IT in general, and especially not about the capacity for the hackers to infiltrate a PC.

The protection systems needs to be further increased in the OS, the applications and also the Banking Industry in general. People need to be protected from themselves.......

Linux does offer a lot of advantages but does not offer everything.....it’s a good start though. The banking industry should be "obliged" to provide 3 step authentication, RSA keys or keypass calculators etc. I presume that the bankers have done their stats though and it is financially beneficial to give people back their money rather than employ tellers at a counter....go figure

The internet needs a little shake up because people will inherently continue to be stupid..... The alternative is to forbid certain people from accessing the web, or at least the Banking part.

There's ONE country that really likes the iPhone 5c as well as the 5s

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Statistically, doesn't Britain have more Chavs than any other country in the world. Unfortunately not all Chavs will have the wonga required for a 5S therefore they will adopt the 5C, especially if they can get a Burberry themed case.

In this respect the 5C will definately take over the 5S in sales terms.

The Mericans got tham there Rednecks.....

The Brits got Chavs, what......

Valve shows Linux love with SteamOS for gamers

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Re: Who is ready to pay


I completely understand your point of view but ultimately the decisions are not really based upon the programming language DirectX and OpenGL are both free.

Decision as to platform selection are made at a much higher level and it has nothing to do with IT or programmers or chief architects.

I believe that the decisions are made purely on a financial basis, where can we make money, who are our market, how much are they willing to spend, where do we have the largest market.

It can easilly take 10 of millions to produce the major games, the beancounters want to ensure that there is a solid ROI so they only play into the markets for which they are almost garaunteed to find paying customers. They know that the windows users have the money and will spend it.

Linux is free and therefore suffers from the stigma that linux users = freetards. The typical stigmatique Neckbeards who expect software for "free", that they can use and abuse as they see fit. It's not so easy to remove that stigma.

Steam also have a major setback in that they are not sponsored by the major software houses, if and when they do then the game will change ( pun intended). Up until then I do not possibly see how it will remain anything other than a niche market.

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Re: Who is ready to pay

"Have market studies shown Windows users will? Seem to remember quite a high level of piracy among Windows users."

I think you will find that Windows users have been paying, over the top, for quite a few years already. There's not much need to do market research on an already very successfull market. Ubisoft, Electronic Arts, Microsoft ring a bell...

"Then you have not been having the right conversations."

Can you actually cite any real world examples of where the OS has been a hurdle in game development....DirectX is actually on par with OpenGL, the APIs are well documented and a lot of the larger companies don't have a problem using it.

"And the grapes are probably sour anyway.."

Why sour grapes, I have both systems, I have never felt the need or requirement to use Linux as a gaming platform and I personally do not see any future in it. And yes I have a steam account, so I am well aware of what is available on Linux...

The developers are not interested in Linux for the simple reason that they need to be sure about earning real dollars before they will take the risk. For the moment that market sector is still very, very unsure..

Khaptain Silver badge

Who is ready to pay

Steam is not FOSS, have market studies shown that Linux users will actually be willing to pay for the games.

Steam is not a charity and unnecassary for many games, so why bother with it in the first place.. I don't remember many conversations where the OS was the major hurdle.

Personally I don't see this as changing very much at all other than the fact that Steam are trying to capitalise in a niche market.

HTC staring down the barrel of a US sales ban after Nokia's patent coup

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Re: Lost strategy

Thats kinda strange, looking over the last 5 years stock market figures Nokia are not looking like a great company to invest in. From a high of $18.65 to todays $3.9.

Making a profit over 1 quarter is not exactly inspiring

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Lost strategy

Ok, Nokia are in the shit and they decide to use Apples strategy ( or is that Microsofts, Goolges, Motorolas, Samsungs strategy) of suing your opponents into final submission....

What happend to invent, create, design, astound, NEW.........Nowadays it's all legalese.....

If any one you know the French TV satire known as the "Les Guignols" I am sure that you will recognize that we are definately heading towards the rule of the "World Company."

Info : "Les Guignols", they are a bit like Spitting Image but far more satirical and scathing. I think the British have an world class sense of humour, but the French really know how to bite, especially concerning politics.

Fandroids at pranksters' mercy: Android remote password reset now live

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Re: NSA angle

Yes but they wont use the password wipe feature, they prefer to keep knowing what your up to.

Circling the RIM: BB10 becomes chamber of horrors for BlackBerry

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Re: Campaign for real English words...

This is El Reg after all, not the Financial Times ( although they probably have their fair share of buzzwords too).

The pigistes here are highly skilled agents in buzzword bingo, hell, when the left their marketing department caves to become world renowned El Reg hacks they also dragged along the buzzword pasttime.

Personally I am not a great "buzzword bingo" player but I must admit in having a little penchant for the rather clever titles and headlines that appear from time to time.

This article for example "Circling the RIM". I wondered if it not really a El Reg hack spoonerism for "Rimming the circle"..

Ole El Reg.... ------->>>> The icon represents a toreador...........think outside of the box

F-16 fighter converted to drone

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Re: By the time kids today are old enough to be pilots

LarsG, you appear to be forgetting the most important factor - Pilots in the sky can only lose once........

LinkedIn fires back against 'hack-and-spam' US class-action sue bomb

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Social Media Websites et al

I am endlessly amazed at our culture, feeding on social media websites which eventually arrive at a point of critical mass and once reached "you are pwned".

We have seen this time and time and time again and yet the unwashed masses continue to feed.......

Why the penguin -------->

It is the only icon that looks vaguely like a lemming.

Greece ends extra hols for civil servants forced to use hated computers

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Re: Bankrupt - No wonder

I used the term Island in a more esoteric form, as in the are cut off, at least finacially, from the rest of Europe.

They appear to behave , think , cheat and steal as though they were com,peltely independant from the rest of Europe. They have obligations, like all the rest of Europe but instead they chose to lie about economy and we as a European nation have to bail them out.

For every extra day that one of the Greeks are lying in the sun, having a computer day off, you get the right to pay more taxes, the reaper has to be paid at some point in time.

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Bankrupt - No wonder

Did anyone actually work or pay taxes on that damned island ?

I listened to a radio article last night that explained the only reason that the Germans are accepting to bail out the greeks is due to the fact that a lot of the German population have their savings invested down there.

How ironic.

Chaos Computer Club: iPhone 5S finger-sniffer COMPROMISED

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Re: Pinky?

" I think most thieves will choose the latter since it would be a much shorter sentence if you're caught."

I am not convinced that thiefs bring the length of the sentence into the equation when they are stealing things. If they did they would not steal things .....as often..

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Re: Pinky?

The biggest problem with any of the fingers is the fact that, where necessary, they can be easilly removed..... Think small knife and Yakuza.

Office 365 goes to work on an Android

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Apples and oranges

"Android is sneaking up on five years of general availability and it still doesn't even have a word processor that can compete with Microsoft Word 2.0 running on Windows 3.1."

Android in the majority runs on Tablets and Smartphones which are not particulary propice platforms for generating complex office documents, some small editing I can understand though. Comparing that to windows/MS Office which runs in majority on full blown PCS is not really a very fair comparison.

SmartPhone and/or tablets are just not very suitable platforms for complex document creation. No physical keyboard or mouse, forget it.

PEAK APP: After 2013, you'll NEVER again install as many – Gartner

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"The peak is 4.9 downloads a month for iPhone owners, and 6.2 for those packing an Android handset"

Are these the figures for someone that has just bought a new smartphone and does it includes "updates. "

After the fad has worn off and you have made your little collection of usefull things, I think the majority would then be downloading about 3 or 4 per year..... Unless were talking about the under 16 year old group.

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