* Posts by Khaptain

3240 posts • joined 4 May 2008

It's finally happened: Bloke builds BOFH-style goofing-off cattle prod

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Help us out readers: How would you sniff and store network traffic?

Khaptain Silver badge

Wireshark maybe

Wireshark would be my first choice but what exactly are your needs.

Do you just want to make a general sniff or is it more application oriented sniffing that you are after.

As an example : Are you looking to sniff out the various layers of TCP/IP or are you after the URLs that IE is browsing ?.

How much space/resources do you have : Is it only the client machines hard disk, or is there also some kind of NAS ?

Do you need this traffic sent real time ?

Do you need 24/24 worth of sniffing or just periodic snapshots ?

Is there too much sex and violence on TV?

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: @Khaptain - Flower Power + Darwin


Khaptain Silver badge

Flower Power + Darwin

Today's 60 somethings are the children of the 60s. Is it any surprise that they are not complaining at least about the sex and the drugs.....

On top of that the Internet has introduced to Sex and Violence on a whole new scale. The TV cannot even begin to compete with the web....

So yes, we have become blasé to the sex and violence. Yes, society is on the decline and yes it's all down to something called "evolution"..

Japan makes Prius palatable with road map to hydrogen cars

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Go Japan Go

I must admit that until reading your reply that I had assumed that hydrogen was in abundance, wrong... and therefore a good thing. I had always thought that the only difficulty was in the storage...

I also didn't realise how much energy was required to "synthesise" it either... I read a quick paper on why it is not economically viable and I digress, it is not a justifiable solution at the moment.

Shit, I go back to square one....

One of these for me ------------------------------------------>>>>>>

Khaptain Silver badge

Go Japan Go

I truly hope that they succeed on several levels :

* That they really do manage to produce a mass production Hydrogen Engine.

* That they succeed in breaking the Oil cartels by doing so.

* That it begins a new positive industrial era...our current one is pretty grim....

What do we want? CAT VIDEOS! How do we get them? TOR!

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Ha ha ha...!

Or even an AlligaTOR waiting to pounce on a cat.

I know that alligaTORs are not known for pouncing but he might be a particularly virile reptile.

Facebook pays half a billion dollars for firm that slaps ads on videos

Khaptain Silver badge

It's all in the name

An ailing liver is never a good sign..

NSA man says agency can track you through POWER LINES

Khaptain Silver badge

New York or Los Angeles

If I record all of my videos in the middle of Manhatten,LA, Biejing or Bankkok and they manage to discover this fact will it really make anything any easier......

I have difficulty in understanding just how usefull this really is. The proximity would be so large that it would be unusable.. or is there a factor of detection that I didn't understand.

Google Glass faces UK cinema ban: Heaven forbid someone films you crying in a rom-com

Khaptain Silver badge


I would argue that the difference between the two devices is that it is quite obvious what someone is doing with their smartphone, whereas it is far more discreet with Google Glass.

On top of that, yes, it is the fear that is yet another domain that will quickly fall into the already powerfull and monopolistic hands of El Google....

Khaptain Silver badge

Pas en France

>Punters are already told to put away their smartphones in auditoriums

I wish they would do that here in France, every bloody time that I go there are at least a half dozen twunts tweeting, smsing during the whole damned film..

Personally I don't care about someone being a Glasshole in the cinema, they are no where near aas annoying as the texters/smsers...

As for the film industry, well that' a discussion between Google and the MPAA Mafia....

New Russian law punishes online 'extremism'

Khaptain Silver badge

Wide or narrow definition

It would be interesting to have a precise translation of what they deem to be "extremist". There are the obvious Religious, Hard Right Wing forms of extremism but what of the those that are a little less obvious.

As an example:

Would Pussy Riot be consiered as extremist ?

Someone demonstrating peacefully against the hard line government tactics ?

How about Ukranians defending their nation ?

Yes , I know that this is a little bit of Daily Fail tactics but it would still be interesting to understand where the line lies.

Also is this any different from what is happening in the USA, UK ? We just give it a different kind if publicity and nicer names....

Dragons' Den newbie firm Outsourcery: We are losing sales, we need to go DIRECT

Khaptain Silver badge

As solid as a puff of smoke

>next have swung from a profit of £3.5m to a net loss of £1.4m.

So what happend to the £4.9m ?

>Outsourcery has sufficient cash flow for the short term, it said, but over the medium term - in line with the monthly recurring revenue delay - the company warned it is reviewing options to improve working capital.

In other words they are next to broke - Sufficient short term cash flow usually means that they are in a borderline position and that any unexpected bump will send them under.

London teen charged over Spamhaus mega-DDoS attacks

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Poor child

Just like Berlusconi... who is after all just a big child too, with a shiny boot-polished hairdo...

Saddle up for the Tour de Firmware

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: What a waste . . .

Surprised to see that several people really didn't undertand Dan1980's comment.

This is for those that dont quite grasp anything below the first degree.....----------->>>>>>>

True fact: Your CAT wees ... like a racehorse

Khaptain Silver badge

Impossible, I say

After having downed any more than 5 pints of Guinness ( replace with your favorite beverage), which my cat does not do or at least I am not aware of, I am almost sure that I spend longer than 21 seconds sprinkling that porcelain edifice.....

I am not sure that I really want to bring out a stopwatch in a pub toilet in order to verifiy the fact though....

Today in IT news: iPad Fleshlight a reality

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: N! S! F! W!

The priest uses his during confessional, it is after all a gift from Gode.

PS : You have to speak a little bit of French to understand the 2nd part...

Average chump in 'bank' phone scam is STUNG for £10,000 - study

Khaptain Silver badge

That's a lot of chumps

So there have been 2000 people, this year alone, that have over 10 grand on average in the bank that have stumped up all their details over the phone and then got ripped of for the 10K.

People with over 10k in the bank are usually not in the "*chump" crowd.... I am a little bit dubious about what the bank are claiming to be scams.

Now if the bank manager needs a new car / GPS for his yacht or house repair and is a little short then I can easilly see how it might get taken care of....

Needs a little bit of this guy in order to verify the validity of the claims ------->>>>>>

Hackers steal €500k in lightning bank raids

Khaptain Silver badge

Mule Accounts ???

Those mule accounts were created by someone at some point in time, who.

Also, ATM transactions are usually limited to a certain amount per month, so how on earth did they manage to pull out 1/2 Million so quickyl. That equates to a hell of a lot of ATM transactions and a lot of ATM cards.

ATM machine have cameras in them, or were they switched off.

Don't the banks have automatic alerts when certain machine are put into overuse ?

Questions, questions, questions.... Something doesn't quite add up here, either the bansk are incredibly stupid or they had inside help.

Creepy battery-operated teddy bear sex toy..,sadly, this is for real

Khaptain Silver badge

Maybe not so innocent

So that's why Paddington Bear has a rather smug look.

Mobile SIM chip-makers 'will be fined by EU' for price-fixing, say sources

Khaptain Silver badge


If they were found guilty, had to pay the fine and did actually pay it, what would the sum of monies actually be used for ?

Drone-assisted Swiss construct virtual 3D castle

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Preferred the real thing

Try telling that to all the Interwebby pRon users..... Some of them might have been lucky enough to have had a little taste 9 years ago.....since then they are more than happy with just the images (vids).

Own goal as World Cup Wi-Fi passwords spilled in newspaper snap

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Cameras in a secure environment

I suppose that takes "Reverse Engineering" to a whole new level.

Khaptain Silver badge

Cameras in a secure environment

First question : Why was a picure allowed to be taken within an environment dealing with security.

Star Wars museum to land in Chicago

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Re: Marin and San Francisco counties both screwed the pooch.

I would have put them on about even.

Apple wins patent to pump ads to your iDevice while you're watching TV

Khaptain Silver badge

The contemporary King James Bible

And the Lord God decided to smite the people for their sins with seven terrible punishments..

As they walked down the street they were surrounded by advertising.

As they watched television they are subliminally exposed to advertising.

As they surfed the web they were smitten hard by advertising.

As they supported their favorite sports team they were blasted with advertising.

As they listened to thy radio they were interupted with advertising.

As they sat waiting for the main film to start they were forced to watch 20 minutes of advertising.

And as they defacated they even had to read the advertising on the toilet paper, as it was the lastest place on earth that advertising had reached......




Moral of the story : A man can't even shit in peace nowadays without someone coming up with an idea for advertising, how much worse can it get.

EXPOSED: Massive mobile malware network used by cops globally

Khaptain Silver badge
Black Helicopters

Nokia 3310

Looking better every day.......

Microsoft is still touting Android smartphones – meet the new Nokia X2

Khaptain Silver badge

Target Market ?

>It's not planned for a UK launch but then neither was the X

Which market is it coming out it in ? For 100$ I would be happy to buy one.

Snowden defends mega spy blab: 'Public affairs have to be known by the public'

Khaptain Silver badge

What has changed since

Now tha the Snowden affair is dimming into the past it would be intersting to know if the NSA/GCHQ/etc have actually changed anything at all about their respective methods or procedures for large data collection, or is it still BAU.

Google Nest slurps your life into the Matrix? The TRUTH

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: I think I'm going to move to hidden cave in the mountains and become a hermit...

They're coming to take me away, ha-haaa!!

They're coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-haaa

To the funny farm. Where life is beautiful all the time and I'll be

happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats and they're

coming to take me away, ha-haaa!!!!!

Napoleon XIV

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: So if we want to break into your house...

following on :

Latest Tweet :

John Smith's robot has been remanded in custody for violently tazing Joe Bloggs. Online tweeters tweeted that Mr Bloggs was apparently found in a shocked state with one hand still desperately clutching his smartphone, the last unfinshed tweet simply said "ohh fuc.......".

Who needs a ride-on mower when a ROBOT will cut your grass

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: What about rain?

> Also at different times of year I find the grass needs to be cut at different intervals,

You can send it out every day so the grass will never really get any longer that a day or twos worth.

As for the ramps well I am afraid to tell you that you will probably need to fork out £5200, one for each section....ouch.... You will be the poorest man in the neighbourhood but will then be in a position to win a prize for your multi-tiered, automatically cut, perfectly groomed lawns....

Khaptain Silver badge


How do these things behave when confronted with children or animals. Ok, most dogs will simply run away and cats generally don't hang around but let's say for arguements sake that one of my dogs is having one of his sunbathing sessions and is lying(sleeping) legs fully stretched out. Will this thing simply whip of a piece of skin or two as it passes by and leave said doggy in a miserable state or will it stop, back up and complete it's task thouroughly.

Our dogs are not the most intelligent and tend to want to play with dangerous items rather than ran away from them. Since this thing is electric I presume that it doesn't make much nose compared to a pertrol driven version.

Also will they mulch through aforementioned doggies waste products.... Our dogs are small and have the nasty habit of leaving little black treasures on the lawn.

Kudos for being able to use "punctiliousness" in an article.

David Cameron wants mobe network roaming INSIDE the UK

Khaptain Silver badge


Why do the operators have physically seperate networks anyway. Why don't they just pool their resources and have one excellent system rather than a multitude of expensive to maintain individual systems.

#YO_NO! Messaging app 'Yo' gets hit by hackers

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Microsoft hopes for FONDLESLAB FRENZY as Surface Pro 3 debuts

Khaptain Silver badge

It's all in the timing

Third time lucky, i doubt it.

Late to market, definately.

Peak tablet already come and gone.

Potential, small to slightly above small.

Now if this were to come down to the 400 ( Euro, Dollar, Pond) mark then that might be another story....

As it is, for the same price I would prefer the Yoga as does the poster above..

HP Enterprise Services staff feel the burn as managers turn off the cash taps

Khaptain Silver badge

Quick Win

The first stage in cost reduction should be the interdiction of expenses at the Directors level.

Most people would be appauled to learn what goes on those "personal expense" forms. No, it's not just the govt ministers that play that game.

BlackBerry bottoms out: Vows to wow with new Berries

Khaptain Silver badge


As they as the don't try and compete with the other offering and that they remain focused to business I see no reason that they shouldn't succeed.

Microsoft to let customers know where Office 365 is going

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Office 365...

And with the $20Million they could start by improving that Fugly interface. In my personal opinion, It doesn't matter how often I install it, it still looks/feels like crap.

And yes, before anyone jumps own my throat, asthetics/ergonomics are important in interface design.

The other thing that they have to change is the name "Libre office" will never cut it. For anyone that doesn't know Libre is the French word for "free".... As soon as you add the word Free to anything it instantly sounds cheap....

I would suggest something like Business Office, Professional Office etc something that sounds less cheap or more serious.

And now for some tongue in cheek stuff : They could also try renaming the applications to Ward, Axel, PinPoint and Overlook .......

Just for info : I use Libre Office at home but not at work.

Auditors blast Blighty cops over binned multi-million pound IT project

Khaptain Silver badge

"The chief constable that was around at the time this project was approved " probably also lives in a very confortable house and drives a nice Range Rover thanks to the that project. (Whether it went AWOL or not)

Assange™ makes fresh bid for FREEDOM from Scotland Yard's 'physical encirclement'

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Ecuadorian embassy

Didn't a certain Mr Obama swear to remove that facility ? Julian could have released some very interesting leaks about Gitmo.

Khaptain Silver badge

Ecuadorian embassy

I wonder if he will leak any of the Ecuadorian Embassy secrets when he eventually gets out.

2 years in an Ecuadorian embassy doesn't sound much like fun either. I wonder if he actually pays for his own keep.

Tor is '90 per cent of the net' claims City of London Police Commish – and he's dead wrong

Khaptain Silver badge


No, but he definately is uniformed.

Han Solo headed for lengthy stay in bacta tank after Bay Door Control cockup

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: NHS or Private?

More likely Pinewood's insurance company as this, I presume, will be classed as a work accident.

Microsoft poised to take Web server crown from Apache

Khaptain Silver badge

Bring him back

I can't think of a better article for which Eadon should be given a temporary comeback ...

Indie record labels to haul YouTube before the European Commission

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Beep

Glad to hear that the sanity still exists in other parts of the world. Let's hope we can keep it alive without the suits spoiling everything.

Alienware says it WILL ship a Steam Machine in 2014 – running Windows

Khaptain Silver badge

Serious Faux pas

If it runs MS Excel or Word natively then it definately should not be called a Steam Machine.

How would this really differ from my W7 + Steam Client machine, let me guess the version number.

Flying cars, submarine cars – Elon Musk says NOTHING is beyond him

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Challenge

@Irony Deficient

Which option(s) do you consider as being non feasible ?

And, are they any less feasible than flying cars or underwater cars ?

Khaptain Silver badge

Re: Challenge

>How would you propose building a car in the UK to your challenge’s specifications and being able to sell it profitably there for no more than £6,689?

Now you see just how interesting the challenge really is.

Khaptain Silver badge


I challenge Elon to make a vehicle as follows

Road legal.

Carries 5 people (average person = 85kgs) i.e. five grown men comfortably..

Must be able to store at least three large sized suitcases in the boot/trunk.

Autonomy of 1000 Kms.

Costs about the equivalent of 3 months’ salary (based upon average nationwide salaries - excluding those within the higher end pay bracket: i.e. anyone that earns over 300 000 $ per year) - applicable throughout the world - price varies according to country because of exchange rates.

Cars must be built locally (nationally) and where possible using home country materials.

Should have good fuel consumption - 3 litres per 100 Kms mixed conditions - Engine should be replaceable by alternative fuel system - today petrol, tomorrow Diesel, after tomorrow Hydrogen etc.

Capable of doing 180Km/h safely.

Must have at least 200 000Kmh or 7 year guarantee for all parts except the usual consumables.

Most if not all parts ( anything that weighs less than 20 kgs) should be user replaceable without the need for special tools. Could create a huge market for customisation.

Must look more aesthetic than a Traban but possibly less than a DB9 in black..

Nothing fancy here, nothing over board but definitely a challenge.

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