* Posts by Haku

1677 posts • joined 13 Apr 2007

UK.gov to treat online abuse as seriously as IRL hate crime

Haku
Silver badge

Oh shit, does that mean we can't use downvote buttons anymore because they're a sign of dislike?

6
0

British snoops at GCHQ knew FBI was going to arrest Marcus Hutchins

Haku
Silver badge

It looks like they were quite desparate to pin something on him, judging by the last paragraph:

"Previously, FBI agents had tried claiming Hutchins might try obtaining firearms to commit crimes, based solely on his having tweeted about visiting a shooting range in Las Vegas – a common tourist pastime in Sin City."

Talk about clutching at straws!

Hey if he tweets "Free this week, for quick gossip/prep before I go and destroy America.", will he get kicked out instead? You know, like those boneheads at Homeland Security did to some Brits a few years back - https://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/01/30/tweet_deportation/

25
0

I say, BING DONG! Microsoft's search engine literally cocks up on front page for hours

Haku
Silver badge

Re: how many double entendres

Give me one.

7
0

London cops urged to scrap use of 'biased' facial recognition at Notting Hill Carnival

Haku
Silver badge

"These images will be retained for the purposes of analysis of this project only and will not be speculatively searched or disseminated for any purpose."

*sniff* *sniff*

Eww, something smells.

*checks under shoes*

Nope, not there, the smell must be coming from that statement.

14
1

Batteries that don't burn at the drop of a Galaxy Note 7? We're listening

Haku
Silver badge

Re: holographic crystal storage...

@Def

Take me to your leader, no not the orange one with the guinea pig toupe.

2
0
Haku
Silver badge

Re: holographic crystal storage...

I'm all for the holographic crystal storage in the future, totally 100%, but I reeeeaaally don't want to have to wear this* to get the benefits of such a storage medium.

.

* don't click the link, seriously.

3
0

Samsung's bantam SSD makes WD's 'passport' drive look passé

Haku
Silver badge

Re: Crikey - $800???

"It'd be nice to see an eSATA port though."

I agree, although an eSATAp port would be even better.

1
0

A glimpse of life under President Zuckerberg? Facebook CEO's boffins censor awkward Q&A

Haku
Silver badge

PR stunt.

23
1

The cheek of it! Beach bar owner shoots nude bather in the booty

Haku
Silver badge

I remember holidaying at that beach.

Though my memories are a little vague because I was 7 at the time, and that was a long time ago.

But it was a good holiday, and there was the time we went on a coach tour that went round the narrow roads on the mountain, and some idiot crashed into the back wheel, of which I was sat right above.

Their Citroen was written off, the coach only needed a new hubcap :)

4
0

Drone-maker DJI's Go app contains naughty Javascript hot-patching framework

Haku
Silver badge

"Once paid for, that's it."

Sadly when you've oughtright bought a product that doesn't have any ongoing payment contract, some companies believe you only have what approximates to a license to use it because they don't want you to take it apart or repair/modify/upgrade it yourself.

This is noteable in the car industry where they're practically computers on wheels that contain propritary software you're apparently not allowed to reverse engineer.

It's also very noteable in the agricultural industry in America, where farmers are not allowed to fix the vehicles they paid for and 'own' - https://www.wired.com/2015/04/dmca-ownership-john-deere/

16
1

Blighty’s beloved Big Ben bell ends, may break Brexit bargain

Haku
Silver badge

We've got modern technology now, how about an official bong app?

One in which the loudness is directly proportional to the proximity of the real bell.

Although, once the real bell starts working again, everyone's bell ends.

5
0

GoDaddy gives white supremacist site its marching orders after Charlottesville slur

Haku
Silver badge
Flame

Re: RE : Brexit

If you don't want to ever read about Brexit anymore, how about you stop reading the bloody internet?

It's still very much a thing, and I'm still very much pissed off about it and those who voted for it.

81
21
Haku
Silver badge

Re: 'scum in the shadows'

Much like how some have believed the Brexit vote result has given them the right to be openly racist.

53
16

Firmware update blunder bricks hundreds of home 'smart' locks

Haku
Silver badge
Facepalm

The Internet of Turmoil strikes again.

30
0

HMS Queen Lizzie impugned by cheeky Scot's drone landing

Haku
Silver badge

Re: Assuming it was armed...

Guns vs racing drones at a shooting range - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xq0oCM37oZA

It's funny watching the law enforcement guys bragging at the beginning about being so sure they're going to shoot down a drone, then they see how small & fast they are...

Best quote of the video is at the briefing from an FPV pilot: "I hope he's clear they have to shoot the drone not the pilot, that would be the easiest way to bring the drone down"

19
0

Lauri Love and Gary McKinnon's lawyer, UK supporters rally around Marcus Hutchins

Haku
Silver badge

Re: "98 per cent of people charged in America take a plea deal."

The US has more prisoners than any other country, including China.

http://www.icpr.org.uk/media/41356/world_prison_population_list_11th_edition.pdf

"There are more than 2.2 million prisoners in the United States of America, more than 1.65 million in China (plus an unknown number in pre-trial detention or ‘administrative detention’), 640,000 in the Russian Federation, 607,000 in Brazil, 418,000 in India, 311,000 in Thailand, 255,000 in Brazil and 225,000 in Iran."

Most certainly the number one country in which you don't want to be accused of a crime.

17
0
Haku
Silver badge

Burn the witch!

I got this weird feeling like I'm reading a news piece about a bunch of pitchfork weilding villagers who lynched the one outsider who came to defend them against an evil digital monster and decided his knowledge of the 'dark arts' meant he was to blame for something else they also couldn't understand.

45
1

70% of Windows 10 users are totally happy with our big telemetry slurp, beams Microsoft

Haku
Silver badge

"Happy" or "Ignorant"?

You can often substitute those two words with each other without changing the meaning of the statement/sencence etc. Look:

"70% of Windows 10 users are totally ignorant with our big telemetry slurp, beams Microsoft"

Still works.

11
0

Britons ambivalent about driverless car tech, survey finds

Haku
Silver badge

Re: I'll take a driverless car please.

You've seen Tron?

1
0
Haku
Silver badge

I'll take a driverless car please.

I passed my driving test first time with no faults, but I don't like driving, I'd rather be doing something more interesting, like posting crap online ;)

4
1

Foot-long £1 sausage roll arrives

Haku
Silver badge

Whilst we're on the subject of food stuff from Morrisons.

I do like their bread from their closest store to me, I vastly prefer it over the offerings from Sainsburys & Tesco, namely because it's denser so when I cut a good 2cm thick slab off a loaf it doesn't cave in or disintigrate when I spread butter from the fridge on it.

To me it's worth going 4 miles to there for that bread than 1 mile to the other major stores.

9
0
Haku
Silver badge

Re: You've got to question the quality

I'd put money on it being a loss leader to get free advertising whilst the footie season is on.

36
0

A sarcasm detector bot? That sounds absolutely brilliant. Definitely

Haku
Silver badge

Re: A massive market

If they think a sarcasm detector bot will be the best thing since sliced bread, an irony detector bot will be the toaster, or something, I need an analogy bot.

19
0

London Mayor slams YouTube over failure to remove 'shocking' violent gang vids

Haku
Silver badge

UK publishes Laws of Robotics for self-driving cars

Haku
Silver badge

Fucking with the 'robots'.

I read a comment recently about drivers who have been screwing with the autopilot feature of Teslas; whilst on freeways people purposely swerving into the lane of a Tesla driver so their car has to react, ie automatically braking or changing lanes.

I did try and find video evidence of this happening, but all I could really find was YouTube videos of how the autopilot has avoided crashes due to the incumbency of other drivers (often rather reasurring evidence of how computers will spot something a human driver misses) but also the occasional piece of footage of the car screwing up and swerving into oncominrg traffic, causing the driver to take back control of the steering wheel, indicating the technology still has a long way to go before full automation on the roads can be completely trusted.

It leaves me wondering what the future of driving will be like when the ratio of computer to human drivers gets close to 1:1.

In the case of human drivers 'trolling' the computer drivers, swerving into the path of them etc., at least those computer driven vehicles will have dashcam evidence of the himan drivers acting like arseholes, because who would design a computer driven vehicle without cameras recording everything that's going on for in the event of something going wrong.

11
0

UK taxmen slammed for tech glitches rampant on child benefits website

Haku
Silver badge

The future will be a paperless office they said.

But you don't need electricity or any knowledge of computers to use a pen & paper.

Upgrading your pen won't render your paper useless.

Your pen & paper can't get infected by ransomware.

Downsides? Reading people''s handwriting and other numerous things you can only do with digitial information (ease of copy/backup/instant distribution to other people etc.)

5
0

Google drops poker face, allows gambling apps on Play Store

Haku
Silver badge

Gambling is like playing against the WOPR

"the only winning move is not to play"

14
0

Capita's smart meter monopoly is owed £42m by industry

Haku
Silver badge

Someone's making one hell of a payday out of these devices that are being touted as money savers for their users.

24
0

'Real' people want govts to spy on them, argues UK Home Secretary

Haku
Silver badge

Re: I must be a fake person.

What if the real part is actually imaginary and the imaginary part is actually real?

4
0
Haku
Silver badge

Re: Amber alert

Sounds like the "Yellow warning of rain." alert I sometimes see on the BBC Weather page, which my brain automatically translates to "It's going to piss down."

I haven't grown up, I just got older :)

11
0
Haku
Silver badge

I must be a fake person.

Because I do not want to be spied upon.

11
0

UAV maker swipes at sponsor of opaque Qinetiq drone study

Haku
Silver badge

Bringing facts to an argument BALPA et al is clearly dodging:

From the Clear Vision Security article about the drone collision study:

Non-Certified Windscreens

One of the proven threats involved the testing of non-birdstrike certified helicopter windscreens. These were shown to fail when hit by drones, which is no great surprise since they also fail when struck by birds, as their name would suggest.

In general aviation (GA), windscreens don’t need to be certified to withstand birdstrikes, so the findings of this study are applicable to a wide variety of aircraft within the GA field. In short they found that if your windscreen won’t withstand a birdstrike it won’t withstand a drone strike either.

To put this within context there were 1835 confirmed birdstrikes reported to the Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) in 2016. To date there has never been a single confirmed drone strike reported to the CAA.

3
0
Haku
Silver badge

Re: I'm torn...

Registration won't work in terms of tracking down law breakers - it's just security theater, giving the authorities the ability to show they're doing something about the 'problem'.

All that will happen is that those who do, and those who are going to, fly safely within the current regulations will continue to do so, but those who have no intention of good flying won't register, so the list will be useless.

If you're thinking about the notion that you'll have to register when you purchase a drone, that'll just make people buy from places that don't make you register, like direct from China which was my where I ordered my first 'proper size' drone from.

3
1

Steve Bannon wants Facebook, Google 'regulated like utilities'

Haku
Silver badge

I think I'm getting latent Dyslexia.

Everytime I see words that start with "tr" my mind automatically replaces them with "ch".

It's especially bad when I'm reading anything about current US politics.

17
2

Clear August 21 in your diary: It's a total solar eclipse for the smart

Haku
Silver badge

And Tintin will use it to save himself from being sacrificed by Trump voters...

3
2

It took DEF CON hackers minutes to pwn these US voting machines

Haku
Silver badge

"but you won't hear about it from articles like this"

That's because the articles on this site are primarily based on aspects of information technology.

Have you not learnt this yet?

10
0

USA to screen tablets,
e-readers and handheld games before they fly

Haku
Silver badge

They wouldn't like my old beat-up tablet.

There's a suspicious looking wire sticking out the side with a JST connector.

I had to modify the tablet to charge its battery directly with a small USB lipo charging module because it won't charge through the USB port anymore.

6
0

UK.gov: You can't have our drone test results because... er, security

Haku
Silver badge

Re: could not find a way to launch...

What about using gravity?

You know, drop the small object onto the big object from a great height.

If they couldn't find a tall enough building they could carry it up high using a bigger drone...

4
0

Think you could deliver a Register lecture? Tell us why

Haku
Silver badge

Re: These are not the speakers you are looking for....

I once did a best man speech, in a completely packed pub, I was nervous as hell but it went down a storm and I ended it with "By Grabthar's Hammer, what a wedding." which I only wrote for the bride & groom to understand

1
0

You know what’s not so throttled at O2? UK sales. They're up 2.6%

Haku
Silver badge
Unhappy

You know what else is going up at O2?

Pay-as-you-go prices. https://www.o2.co.uk/pricing/f

1
0

Revealed: 779 cases of data misuse across 34 British police forces

Haku
Silver badge
Stop

Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Stop giving them so much unrestrained power!

9
0

iRobot just banked a fat profit. And it knows how to make more: Sharing maps of your homes

Haku
Silver badge

Rearrange your furniture every day so the floor plan spells out the letters

F

U

C

you can see where I'm going with this :)

4
1

Time-rich netizens marshall ballot-stuffing bots against... Radio Times contest

Haku
Silver badge

"It's not as if Star Trek versus Star Wars is under discussion."

About that, they should just put aside their differences and get along...

http://www.haku.co.uk/b3ta/StarTrekWars.jpg

Could be interesting, but I'd watch the crap out of this mashup:

http://www.haku.co.uk/b3ta/StarDwarf.jpg

0
0

Las Vegas locks down ahead of DEF CON hacking conference

Haku
Silver badge

Not accepting USB sticks? I don't blame 'em.

This USB stick can destroy most computers in seconds - usbkill.com (url purposely non-clickable)

There are several YouTube videos if you want to see how deadly those things are - https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=usb+killer

0
0

Creepy tech tycoons Zuck and Musk clash over AI doomsday

Haku
Silver badge
Terminator

Re: "letting algorithms decide the fate of people's lives in the fields of healthcare "

If we do get wiped out by robots it'll probably be due to apathy not a Terminator style war.

"I for one welcome our robot overlords, because I'm too lazy to fi.... Siri, turn the tv to the funny clips channel."

6
0
Haku
Silver badge

I don't think the current worry of AI is sentient robots who see the human race as flawed so must eradicate them, but more along the lines of people letting algorithms decide the fate of people's lives in the fields of healthcare & insurance, especially with the ever increasing research into human DNA and the how people are trying to use that information to give a percentage on how likely you are to get certain types of cancer in your life.

That would really suck, unable to get life insurance even though you're fit as a fiddle but the computer says no because it looked at your DNA.

14
0

Brits must now register virtually all new drones and undergo safety tests

Haku
Silver badge

Idenitifying a drone thousands of meters up, hundreds of meters away - bullshit!

I've flown my 380 size quadcopter, about 1.2kg with the camera & gimbal attached, straight up 100 meters to get some scenic view footage.

At that distance away it can be near impossible to spot it when you're looking at wide open sky, even though you know where it's supposed to be and can hear it, and see its camera view from the ground.

If it's so difficult to spot a stationary drone from a stationary spot, that's only 100 meters away, how the hell do those pilots, flying at hundreds of miles an hour, can say with absolute certainty that tiny speck in the distance is a drone?

I call bullshit on that.

2
0
Haku
Silver badge

Re: Call the RSPB

There are an estimated 7.4 million cats in the UK, I think the number of bird deaths by drones pales into comparison with that of bird deaths by cats.

3
0
Haku
Silver badge

You can't stop idiots breaking the law.

All this will do is screw over everyone who is already going by the rules.

Making a list of drone owners will only give them a list of people who aren't likely to do bad things, namely because they registered.

There won't be a list of people who fly drones where they shouldn't, because they won't fucking register!

How are they going to police it? It's not like the police force is suddenly going to get a boost in funds to deal with all the new 'crime' they plan on legislating.

2
0

Al Capone was done for taxes. Now Microsoft's killing domain-squatters with trademark law

Haku
Silver badge

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017