* Posts by Paul Hovnanian

1128 posts • joined 16 Mar 2008

NURSES' natural DESIRES to be SATISFIED, by technology

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Nurses' Desires ....

Sorry. My mind wandered there for a bit....

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y29/scottjamescmc/American Geisha/Nurse.jpg

GIANT EYEBALL PANIC ends: Oceanic peeper identified

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Be on the lookout ...

... for a swordfish sporting an eye patch. Possibly also with parrot and peg leg.


Protestors target Google over that video

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

All religions ....

... come together and develop an approach to this kind of material.

Fine. But only if the Pastafarians are in charge of the effort. Otherwise, I'll be offended.

Take away bad drivers' mobile phones, they still crash their cars

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Leave the phones. Take away the cars.

Vote NOW for the vilest Bond villain

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Le Chiffre. Played by Peter Lorre.

Swiss photographer sues Apple for pilfering her eyeball

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

No problem. There's a squid eyeball (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/10/12/florida_giant_eyeball/) available for photo ops.

US trounces UK in climate scepticism jibber-jabber

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Skepticism is normal. In science. Scientists always test their theories, by this method modifying and improving them. What we appear to have here is a Madison Avenue type attempt at selling the AGW 'message' to the public.

If the mainstream scientists' climate models couldn't explain (by their own admission) the recent expansion in Antarctic ice cover, then its back to the drawing board. Until they get something working that explains new data (part of the definition of a theory: Something that can make useful predictions), their models don't stand up to scrutiny. And we shouldn't be making irreversible policy decisions based upon them.

The real climate scientists should be rejoicing. Here's another reason to get backing for more and better instruments, research funds and supercomputers. If they really think their job is finished and their work is ready for legislation, we should cut back funding and divert the money towards feeding the poor children in Africa. The scientists can all get jobs at Starbucks.

Inside the real-world Double-O section of Her Majesty's Secret Service

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Paris Hilton

What about ....

.... Pussy Galore? The rest of the boring reality I can put up with.

Paris, asking "Speak into what? It's a microphone? Seriously?"

US said to designate Assange 'enemy' of the state

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Big Brother

"But they've kept the declaration secret, so most of the members of their armed forces don't know about the declaration that could have them facing the death penalty?"

Most of the members of the armed forces have secret clearances, so this information has most likely been disseminated to them already. Just because you and I are hearing about it now doesn't mean its not already old news.

What could be a problem is to have some members of the armed forces RickRolled into visiting WikiLeaks, the logs recorded and then this information held for the purposes of blackmail. Sending info. in; still a No-no. Taking a quick peek; so what? Don't ask, don't tell* at worst.

*This is what made this policy for gays so damaging. If you are 'out' you're out (of the armed forces), so gays became susceptible to blackmail.

Curiosity photographs evidence of ancient streams on Mars

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Keep the river on your right

And please, send some astronauts instead of these robots.

Thank you,

The Martians

Tibetan STATUE found by 1930s NAZI expedition is of ALIEN ORIGIN

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

No photos, please.

It'll melt your face off.

Fans rap Apple's 'crap' Map app

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Map data source

Supposedly, iMaps data was derived (in part) from OpenStreetMap (http://www.openstreetmap.org/) data. So, what is everyone's experience with the accuracy of that? I've installed it (with a Shuttle Radar Topographic map overlay) for Washington State. And it appears to be pretty accurate here.

So, is OpenStreetMap screwed up in your neighborhood? Or did Apple mess up the conversion?

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Greece and Spain show up as states of Germany ......

..... Oh, never mind. I figured it out.

Senate hears Microsoft and HP avoided billions in US taxes

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

National Sales Tax

To replace income and corporate profits taxes. Earn it, bank it, invest it where you want. But if you sell your product or service inside our borders, you collect a tax on it.

Google's stats show few Android tablets in use

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Androd App Market?

Its bigger than Google, right? I mean the whole point of Android being open rather than a walled garden ala iOS is that multiple stores are possible. These statistics might be more of a condemnation of Google's store rather than of the platform itself.

If you want to know how well Android tablets are selling, ask the tablet manufacturers and retailers.

Schlockmeister Troma's back catalog hits YouTube

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Bad timing

They shouldn't have released this in the middle of the US political campaign season. Its just going to get lost in all the other schlock.

Sharp's slim screen factory 'flogged to death' by Apple

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Sharp is busy ...

... filling that big new Samsung order for phones that don't violate US patents. Apple will just have to wait.

Fired Toyota coder trashes systems, steals data

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Re: There are better and legal ways to get revenge on an ex-employer.

Get laid off after having developed a large and complex system because your employer wants to outsource everything. A firm picks up the development and maintenance contract, finds my name in the source code comments and hires me as a consultant for much more than I made as an employee. Shorter hours, too.

I had 60 days notice when I got my layoff notice. That was time enough to tie up loose ends and train my replacement. I carefully documented every account and configuration setting for about a dozen host systems that he'd have to administrate (and hopefully change logons). One setting was an e-mail address (my home address) that would receive automated system status messages should something go down. I suggested that he redirect this to his home or work address. Years later, I continued to get occasional system status messages at home.

And these people deal with DoD security issues (not my systems, fortunately).

Young alcoholic star 'covered in fluids needed for birth of alien life'

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Alcohol involved in conception? Happens here all the time.

Ho ho ho! Apple's Samsung ban bid pushed back to Christmas

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

From now on ....

... settle all patent disputes with a MMA cage fight between company CEOs. To the death.

Disable Java NOW, users told, as 0-day exploit hits web

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Java plugin disabled ...

... on my system's browsers. I've rarely had a complaint from any website.

JavaScript is up for all but a few bad actors.

Java (the JRE and JDK, version 1.6) are up on my system. I've got gobs of stand alone (non browser) applications to run. But it sounds like this is a vulnerability of Java running under the plugin rather than standalone. Correct me if I'm wrong.

At any rate, I can like with v1.6 until the patch comes out.

Police mistake reveals plan for Assange's Embassy capture

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

One solution ...

... would be for Assange to negotiate a 'no extradition' agreement with the Swedish courts. Submit to an investigation, trial and possibly a penalty for the rape allegations. Sure, he could spend a few years in a Swedish prison if all goes badly. But he could be stuck in that Ecuadorian embassy for just as long. Then, obtain an agreement (before stepping out of the embassy) that Sweden and Britain are to ensure his security en route to Sweden and from there to a secure location afterwards. Far too many people are watching this circus for the US to step in and try anything funny. Handcuff Assange to a well known reporter (volunteer) for the journey, if necessary.

Perhaps its time for him to accept a small dose of martyrdom for 'the cause'. In fact, he's already there, having to sleep on sofas in offices. And if, as he claims, the rape charges are groundless, he will only be inconvenienced to a small degree compared to the status quo.

The US is winning this conflict by default in demonstrating that they can inconvenience anyone anywhere in the world through extralegal means and threats. The biggest F* You one can give to such bullies is to go on about your business as if they aren't a bother.

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Thought that was a telephone booth in the Ecuadorian embassy lobby? Turns out it was a TARDIS.

Assange just stepped out to make a phone call the last time we saw him .....

Apple's patent insanity infects Silicon Valley

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Jobs is gone

There will be no more innovation. Apple is trying to hang on to what it has.


Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

12 inches across

They sure are cute when they are babies.

Creepy skull find proves Man penetrated Asia 60,000 years ago

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

The body washed in ....

.... or it was some poor fool who was the object of a 'snipe hunt'.

"Guys? Hey guys? How long do I have to sit in this cave with this sack and lantern? Hello? Anyone there?"

'Sex and the female brain are connected' - shock discovery

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Intelligence Transfer?

So sex stimulates the female brain. Years of anecdotal evidence suggests that sex interferes with male mental processes. So this activity might be zero sum.

Paris, saying "Huh?" because she hasn't had me. Yet.

Can YOU crack the Gauss uber-virus encryption?

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

What's the object of the exercize?

To block further spread, inoculate infected systems, or to understand the scope of the damage that may already have been done?

I think the people at whom this has been targeted are going to want some idea of what information has been compromised and by whom. And the only way of doing that is to find the systems for which the encrypted payload targeted. Then, use information from those systems to decrypt the payload and examine it.

Since the owners of targeted systems are highly motivated to understand the scope of the impact, they will probably volunteer some system information to Kaspersky to assist them it their analysis. This assistance will probably be provided under some non disclosure terms.

British boffin builds cool maser after argument with wife

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Argument with the wife?

Everyone knows that you've got to include a shark to make a laser more effective.

Scientists find safer way to store hydrogen

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Add another one to the list

Depending on what sort of performance one wants (optimize weight, volume, pressure, temperature, etc.) there are a number of technologies (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydrogen_storage).

Perhaps the best would be some sort of liquid hydrocarbon, formed with the hydrogen to be stored and carbon extracted from combustion processes or the atmosphere. At least it would be carbon neutral. And we know how to pump, store and burn hydrocarbons.

Fisker Automotive probes second flaming eco car

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Tesla Roadster

None of this back up petrol engine stuff.

Up to 245 miles range (depending on the lead in your foot). 0 to 60 MPH in under 4 seconds. And a price tag of over $100K, if that's what impresses your friends.

Curiosity's new OS upgrade ready to go live

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

"resembled parts of the southwestern US."

Red states?

No aliens allowed?

Middle Eastern Gauss malware could be state sponsored

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Palida Narrow?

It puzzles me as to why one would want to install some font as an infection payload. This site:


has some ideas. But for now, if we want to mess with people's heads, where can we obtain a copy of Palida Narrow? I suppose I could rename a copy of Lucida Bright Narrow*.

Get this on enough (uninfected) systems and pretty soon the significance of having it will be compromised.

Better yet, rename Dingbats. Then it will be obvious which web sites' CSS specifiy it and might be up to no good.

BOFH: Our Excel-lent new boss and the diagram plan

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge


Now, explain to the PHB how L has nine levels, or 'circles'. And how he will have to complete each before the project is complete.

Then, wait for the blank expression.

Hello nasty, don't use my music: Deceased Beastie Boy to admen

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

So, what happpens ...

.... when the two survivors get a bit down on their luck and decide its time to cash in on their past work?

By the time the court challenges are settled, the only people left that will be buying anything to a Beastie Boys jingle will be buying adult diapers.

Oooh-la-la! 'iPhone 5' bares all, strokes tiny nano-SIM in pics

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge


Anyone see where my SIM went?

First full landing site and colour pictures back from Mars

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Fancy haircut? Big deal! I'm working on a reverse Mohawk.

Curiosity needs OS upgrade before getting down to science

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Telemetry received

Please enter your Windows Product Key now. You will find this on a label affixed to the underside of your rover.

(I hope someone remembered to write this down before launch.)

Why women won't apply for IT jobs

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Paris Hilton

37.5 hours a week?

The rest is spent fetching coffee for the boss.

And now you know why .....

Microsoft tightens grip on OEM Windows 8 licensing

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

"keyed to that particular computer's hardware"

And at what point does this key become invalid when someone adds new hardware? Didn't MS try something like this before? And get bitten in the a** when PCs suddenly went inop?

Booth babes banned by Chinese gaming expo

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Big Brother

Communist Chinese Attitudes

This appears to be a symptom of the Chinese Communist Party's conservative attitudes toward sex.

Thanks to their 'one child' policy and the preference for at least one male heir, there is now an over supply of single males in China. And the implications for a stable society have not escaped the authorities. That said, I think they are going to make their problems worse rather then better. Banning on-line (and other forms of) porn and cracking down on prostitution may backfire. It might be better to legalize and regulate prostitution that to expect a bunch of single males to sit at home and think party approved thoughts. In the mean time, creating scarcity of any commodity will increase its price (not necessarily just monetary) and a certain segment of society will step over the legal boundaries to posses it.

Microsoft promises Metro developers 'fame and fortune'

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Fame, fortune ....

... and all the Kool-Aid you can drink.

Google ordered to censor 'torrent', 'megaupload' and more words

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Oh no!

We won't be able to find info about Jean Lafitte on the web any more!

Microsoft sells out of MSNBC.com, plans to open own news pipe

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Brand alignment? Product integration?

The late Steve Jobs never managed to pull off a seamless TV/Internet Appliance integration. And Apple (under Jobs) was the master at integrating hardware, software and services with an intuitive UI.

I'm not betting on Microsoft pulling this off either. In fact, as soon as Microsoft figures that they aren't selling additional copies of Windows, they'll give up right there.

Giant super-laser passes 500 TRILLION watts

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge


How many houses full of popcorn is this?

Sleek new Macs violate fanbois' Retinas with display garbage

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Problem solved

Apple just renames their display technology iPicasso.

US county named 'area of outstanding natural stupidity'

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Don't upset them

They've got nukes.

Ballmer plays down sales impact of Surface

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Giving up already?

Make some room in the trash bin next to the Zune.

Paris, because relationships just don't seem to last after the initial press release.

Global warming: It's GOOD for the environment

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

RE: Fear of a weedy planet

"Until we figure out a way to eat grass and brambles, "

We plant wheat or other similar crops. Or we let animals graze on the 'grass and brambles' and then we eat them. We didn't spend the last 5000 years fighting our way to the top of the food chain without learning a few tricks.

Dell seeks Linux fans to try cut-price Ubuntu Ultrabook

Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

Project Sputnik?

Launch a basically harmless piece of hardware over the heads of your mortal enemies. Enemies who are currently mired in a swamp of complacency. This will motivate them to catch up and even surpass your efforts.

In the final analysis, who is launching all the supplies and crew to the ISS now?

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019