* Posts by Paul Hovnanian

1106 posts • joined 16 Mar 2008

Police mistake reveals plan for Assange's Embassy capture

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Thought that was a telephone booth in the Ecuadorian embassy lobby? Turns out it was a TARDIS.

Assange just stepped out to make a phone call the last time we saw him .....

1
0

Apple's patent insanity infects Silicon Valley

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Jobs is gone

There will be no more innovation. Apple is trying to hang on to what it has.

0
2

NASA: WE'VE FOUND Four-toed NON-HUMAN FOOTPRINTS

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

12 inches across

They sure are cute when they are babies.

1
0

Creepy skull find proves Man penetrated Asia 60,000 years ago

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

The body washed in ....

.... or it was some poor fool who was the object of a 'snipe hunt'.

"Guys? Hey guys? How long do I have to sit in this cave with this sack and lantern? Hello? Anyone there?"

3
0

'Sex and the female brain are connected' - shock discovery

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Intelligence Transfer?

So sex stimulates the female brain. Years of anecdotal evidence suggests that sex interferes with male mental processes. So this activity might be zero sum.

Paris, saying "Huh?" because she hasn't had me. Yet.

2
0

Can YOU crack the Gauss uber-virus encryption?

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

What's the object of the exercize?

To block further spread, inoculate infected systems, or to understand the scope of the damage that may already have been done?

I think the people at whom this has been targeted are going to want some idea of what information has been compromised and by whom. And the only way of doing that is to find the systems for which the encrypted payload targeted. Then, use information from those systems to decrypt the payload and examine it.

Since the owners of targeted systems are highly motivated to understand the scope of the impact, they will probably volunteer some system information to Kaspersky to assist them it their analysis. This assistance will probably be provided under some non disclosure terms.

1
0

British boffin builds cool maser after argument with wife

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Argument with the wife?

Everyone knows that you've got to include a shark to make a laser more effective.

1
0

Scientists find safer way to store hydrogen

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Boffin

Add another one to the list

Depending on what sort of performance one wants (optimize weight, volume, pressure, temperature, etc.) there are a number of technologies (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydrogen_storage).

Perhaps the best would be some sort of liquid hydrocarbon, formed with the hydrogen to be stored and carbon extracted from combustion processes or the atmosphere. At least it would be carbon neutral. And we know how to pump, store and burn hydrocarbons.

2
0

Fisker Automotive probes second flaming eco car

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Tesla Roadster

None of this back up petrol engine stuff.

Up to 245 miles range (depending on the lead in your foot). 0 to 60 MPH in under 4 seconds. And a price tag of over $100K, if that's what impresses your friends.

1
1

Curiosity's new OS upgrade ready to go live

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

"resembled parts of the southwestern US."

Red states?

No aliens allowed?

1
0

Middle Eastern Gauss malware could be state sponsored

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Holmes

Palida Narrow?

It puzzles me as to why one would want to install some font as an infection payload. This site:

http://blog.crysys.hu/2012/08/on-the-palida-narrow-mystery-of-gauss-malware-and-possible-remote-detection/

has some ideas. But for now, if we want to mess with people's heads, where can we obtain a copy of Palida Narrow? I suppose I could rename a copy of Lucida Bright Narrow*.

Get this on enough (uninfected) systems and pretty soon the significance of having it will be compromised.

Better yet, rename Dingbats. Then it will be obvious which web sites' CSS specifiy it and might be up to no good.

1
0

BOFH: Our Excel-lent new boss and the diagram plan

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Devil

PHB

Now, explain to the PHB how L has nine levels, or 'circles'. And how he will have to complete each before the project is complete.

Then, wait for the blank expression.

2
0

Hello nasty, don't use my music: Deceased Beastie Boy to admen

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

So, what happpens ...

.... when the two survivors get a bit down on their luck and decide its time to cash in on their past work?

By the time the court challenges are settled, the only people left that will be buying anything to a Beastie Boys jingle will be buying adult diapers.

1
0

Oooh-la-la! 'iPhone 5' bares all, strokes tiny nano-SIM in pics

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Unhappy

Gesundheit!

Anyone see where my SIM went?

1
0

First full landing site and colour pictures back from Mars

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Facepalm

Fancy haircut? Big deal! I'm working on a reverse Mohawk.

2
0

Curiosity needs OS upgrade before getting down to science

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Facepalm

Telemetry received

Please enter your Windows Product Key now. You will find this on a label affixed to the underside of your rover.

(I hope someone remembered to write this down before launch.)

3
0

Why women won't apply for IT jobs

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

37.5 hours a week?

The rest is spent fetching coffee for the boss.

And now you know why .....

0
2

Microsoft tightens grip on OEM Windows 8 licensing

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Facepalm

"keyed to that particular computer's hardware"

And at what point does this key become invalid when someone adds new hardware? Didn't MS try something like this before? And get bitten in the a** when PCs suddenly went inop?

3
0

Booth babes banned by Chinese gaming expo

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Big Brother

Communist Chinese Attitudes

This appears to be a symptom of the Chinese Communist Party's conservative attitudes toward sex.

Thanks to their 'one child' policy and the preference for at least one male heir, there is now an over supply of single males in China. And the implications for a stable society have not escaped the authorities. That said, I think they are going to make their problems worse rather then better. Banning on-line (and other forms of) porn and cracking down on prostitution may backfire. It might be better to legalize and regulate prostitution that to expect a bunch of single males to sit at home and think party approved thoughts. In the mean time, creating scarcity of any commodity will increase its price (not necessarily just monetary) and a certain segment of society will step over the legal boundaries to posses it.

1
0

Microsoft promises Metro developers 'fame and fortune'

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Windows

Fame, fortune ....

... and all the Kool-Aid you can drink.

4
0

Google ordered to censor 'torrent', 'megaupload' and more words

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Pirate

Oh no!

We won't be able to find info about Jean Lafitte on the web any more!

1
0

Microsoft sells out of MSNBC.com, plans to open own news pipe

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Brand alignment? Product integration?

The late Steve Jobs never managed to pull off a seamless TV/Internet Appliance integration. And Apple (under Jobs) was the master at integrating hardware, software and services with an intuitive UI.

I'm not betting on Microsoft pulling this off either. In fact, as soon as Microsoft figures that they aren't selling additional copies of Windows, they'll give up right there.

2
0

Giant super-laser passes 500 TRILLION watts

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Boffin

Units?

How many houses full of popcorn is this?

11
0

Sleek new Macs violate fanbois' Retinas with display garbage

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Happy

Problem solved

Apple just renames their display technology iPicasso.

2
0

US county named 'area of outstanding natural stupidity'

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Mushroom

Don't upset them

They've got nukes.

0
1

Ballmer plays down sales impact of Surface

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Giving up already?

Make some room in the trash bin next to the Zune.

Paris, because relationships just don't seem to last after the initial press release.

6
0

Global warming: It's GOOD for the environment

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

RE: Fear of a weedy planet

"Until we figure out a way to eat grass and brambles, "

We plant wheat or other similar crops. Or we let animals graze on the 'grass and brambles' and then we eat them. We didn't spend the last 5000 years fighting our way to the top of the food chain without learning a few tricks.

8
0

Dell seeks Linux fans to try cut-price Ubuntu Ultrabook

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Project Sputnik?

Launch a basically harmless piece of hardware over the heads of your mortal enemies. Enemies who are currently mired in a swamp of complacency. This will motivate them to catch up and even surpass your efforts.

In the final analysis, who is launching all the supplies and crew to the ISS now?

2
0

Computer error triggers mass rocket launch

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Mushroom

Its only fireworks

It could have been worse.

"How about a nice game of chess, Doctor Falken?"

4
0

US federal boffins insist that mermaids DON'T exist

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

After a few months at sea, even a manatee looks pretty good to some people. Why spoil their fantasy?

1
0

Samsung fails to get Galaxy Tab ban in US lifted pending appeal

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Not available in the USA? Time for a quick hop over the Canadian border.

I'd better hurry before US Customs finishes training their Samsung-sniffing dogs

1
0

Second win for Apple as Galaxy Nexus sales banned in US

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Pirate

Perhaps MGM should sue Apple for copying their tablet design from 2001: A Space Odyssey. Prior art and all, the copyright coverage of that design will last a lot longer than some patents.

4
0

First lady taikonaut and pals plunge into the dirt after space mating

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Scary looking re-entry. There was a shot of the capsule early in the re-entry phase with what appears to be some hardware detaching. Although this was probably planned, it is a bit disconcerting in the context of the Columbia re-entry breakup.

1
0

Microsoft's offices gutted in Athens arson attack

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Mushroom

Nothing to see here. Just an old XBox power supply.

3
0

Microsoft says tablets will trump PCs in 2013

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Coat

Battling the UI

I gave up trying that years ago, what with Aero, ribbons and the continual hunt for elusive menu items.

Obligatory bad car analogy: If GM kept moving their gas, brake and clutch pedals around every few model years, I wouldn't buy their cars (I wouldn't anyway, but that's another story).

Mine's the one with the Print function in this pocket .... no, wait, maybe its the other pocket. Or the other coat.

12
0

TERROR in SEATTLE: Gang of violent LEPRECHAUNS on the loose

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

They say people go crazy when the moon is full:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/06/22/planet_pair_close_together/

This was enough to drive them completely bonkers.

1
0

Kepler space telescope peers at hot alien couple

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

That's no moon!

1
0

Source code smoking gun links Stuxnet AND Flame

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

"A lot of AV these days uses heuristics to pick up suspicious behaviour. The authors have widely agreed that tagging only known stuff is whackamole."

Which will work against virii that attack any system they are installed on. But for those that target specific installations, or don't hog resources on systems they inhabit, they could be difficult to detect.

Stuxnet could have been caught sooner by anyone running PCs connected to Siemens PLCs running Uranium enriching centrifuges. On any other machine, the virus lays low, possibly propagating itself to USB media or over the 'Net.

2
0

Smart meters are 'massive surveillance' tech - privacy supremo

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

So they can tell what program your TV is watching? Big deal. My set top box is already selling that info back to the cable company.

I'd worry about meters that provide real time data which some tech savvy thieves can use to scan a neighborhood and figure out who is on vacation. Or during what times of the day your house is empty.

2
1

Lard-busting specs trick snack-happy Japanese

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

The porn applications of this technology are almost limitless.

0
0

White AMERICANS will have become MEKON brain-men by 3000AD

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Meh

Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they expect me to comment on articles like this. Call that job satisfaction, 'cause I don't. [Sigh]

2
0

LINX 'downed by ethernet loop' on external network

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

RE: warning to everyone out there!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPgV6-gnQaE

0
0

People-powered Olympic shopping mall: A sign of utter tech illiteracy

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Hmm. They must have had WalMart in mind when they came up with these energy yield figures.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/photos

1
0

Microsoft will fiddle with prices as euro burns, UK biz fears

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

Puzzling

Its not like Microsoft has to recover some costs incurred in the local currency. There isn't a mine somewhere in Whales were they have to dig up copies of Windows and incur the associated wage and overhead costs (its more likely Windows comes from under old outhouse sites).

Their marginal cost per Windows/Office license is close to zero. Pricing in each market is pretty much an issue of maximizing revenue in that market. Expenses are a matter of accounting gymnastics to spread the development costs across each copy sold. And we all know how easily MS (and other IT firms) can open branch offices and magically move chunks of expenses and revenues into markets with tax and/or exchange rate advantages.

So, what's with the screwball pricing structure?

1
0

WTF is... Li-Fi?

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Car to car

Modulate LED tail and/or brake lights to inform the vehicle behind you of a panic stop. An ad-hoc mesh network can relay such data back to cars further back.

Paris, because getting rear-ended could be a thing of the past.

1
0

Billion-dollar high-tech ghost town to run itself without humans

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Terminator

SkyNet ...

... anyone?

0
0

Cloud data fiasco forces bosses to break out the whiteboards

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Mushroom

Not to worry

Our IT guys assure us that they've got backups of everything over on Megaupload.com.

There are clouds and then there are clouds.

1
0

Evil plot to control souls via Wi-Fi thwarted

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Devil

The Evangelicals think they own the copyright on crazy.

1
0

Intelligence a genetic mistake

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge
Windows

A Genetic Mistake

Not to worry. We're hard at work trying to correct it. Give us a few more generations and we'll breed that tragic error right out.

22
0

UK Ministry of Defence eyes GPS patent payoff

Paul Hovnanian
Silver badge

The US DoD project was initiated in 1973 and became operational in 1994. I purchased a handheld GPS in 1998. So what's with this patent cropping up in 2003?

Is the wheel still patentable?

4
8

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018