* Posts by Sarah Bee

2823 publicly visible posts • joined 31 Jan 2008

Paris Hilton correctly identifies UK Prime Minister

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Paris Hilton isn't stupid.

She's a bit like GW Bush (also not nearly as stupid as he appears) in that she uses other people's perceptions of her to great effect. Lots of women take advantage of the fact that people think they're stupid. She's made a whole career out of it, and yeah, I think she's a fairly brilliant businesswoman. And she makes it look like she does absolutely nothing too.

I can't say 'no one is really that stupid', though, because many, many people really are that stupid. They just generally don't make any money at it unless they're exceptionally beautiful and have a great team of people doing everything for them, and then they don't last this long. How long ago was that sex tape? Long long ago. About three decades in celeb-years.

Wi-Fi roaming: US T-Mobile gets it, BT drops it

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Why is BT a former monopoly but...

>Seems like el reg likes to bite some hands and suck up to others

New here, dear?

Time to axe Microsoft's Zune

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: RE:Censorship

Well, bloody repost it then and stop whining. And spell my name right, or I'll smite you good.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Censorship!

Yes, you and about 30 other helpful souls with varying degrees of smugness pointed that one out. I fixed the typo, nixed the comments, and tried to think more of cute puppies being cute than stabby knives being stabby. What do you want, a Krispy Kreme?

Apple threatens Palm chomp

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Palm should say..

I think 'in core[t]' might be a step too far.

Red Dwarf finally returns to Earth

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

This Life special

I had a winter vomiting bug when the This Life reunion was on, so I spent half the time rushing to the loo and yakking up my guts. Guess which half of the time I was having more fun.

Expect nothing of the RD reunion and you won't be disappointed. I think these things are just a weird prurient nostalgia thing - people like to wallow in the weirdness of it with the chemistry of the cast disrupted by years away and everyone looking older. It's always poignant to see the lines around people's eyes when they're still all baby-faced in your head. It's very mild televisual self-torture, basically, and an excuse to whinge about how stuff is never as good as it was and things are only going to get worse and less entertaining.

Whee!

Seven Japanese poisoned by blowfish 'nads

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Wow....

Balls to the danger-buzz. If I'm going to have a self-induced near-death experience to really feel alive, I'd prefer it to be something a bit more challenging or enriching or poetic or extraordinary than munching on an expensive bit of sashimi.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: I think what is most puzzling

>feed it to animals.

Wouldn't necessarily work. Porcupines can scarf down several times the amount of opium that would kill a person if they smoked it, cats die from eating paracetomol, etc etc.

Doner kebabs: Death wrapped in pitta bread

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: ibs rocks

Thank you for that thoughtful and enlightening contribution, AC. I'd say get well soon but you seem to have embraced your condition. Er, good for you?

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: women's daily requirements?

Well, either it's because 1000 is a nice round number to compare directly with a woman's daily calorie requirement which provides a clear and easily-comprehended point of comparison and illustration and that despite the fact that it's most likely men who are the consumers in this instance, or IT'S SOME KIND OF NEWS CONSPIRACY BY THE FEMINAZI RULE OF LAW OMG.

How can you live your life being suspicious of everything? It's not healthy. We'll have to put you on a 'take one thing a day at face value' diet.

Benjamin Button eyes 13 Oscars

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

ah

I just remembered the other reverse-ageing film of recent years - Francis Ford Coppola's Tim Roth-starring turkey Youth Without Youth. I bet they're mad now.

Carry on.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: IT? Seconded

I can't believe people still a) query the lack of IT angle *in a story which is clearly in the 'entertainment' section* like blithering monomaniacs and b) imagine for an instant that a brusque order for the Reg to do something in future will result in anything but us doing the total opposite.

I mean, it's not hard to grasp. Do you need help tying your shoes, or what?

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Kate Winslet, Double Golden Globes?

Sigh. Is your mother proud of you, Martin?

Extreme porn law goes live - are you ready?

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @Sarah Bee

That's better! Thanks.

Hmm, I wonder if I can get everyone else who's got no excuse to use spellcheck. Hmmmmm.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @sid

Right.

AC - Don't be rude.

Michael - Knowing you're dyslexic I'm inclined to let your comments through, but that does have to mean I have to moderate all the abuse from people who either don't know or don't care. Can you help me out?

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: What Would Jesus Say?

Oh, I dropped this

-ly

I had my hands full at the time, etc.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: What Would Jesus Say?

>It is the psychopath's inability to empathise with the victim that allows them to do their pyschopathic thing. Oh sure, there maybe some people in an SM relationship who think that way but most of the BDSM fuit loops I've met have more complex and unpleasant motivations.

That seems a rather narrow-minded view. It smacks* of the inverse of the 'some of my best friends are gay/black/Jewish *actually*' fallback. You don't give the impression you really spoke to any of the many, many 'fruit loops' you've apparently encountered long enough to take the wildest guess at the nature of their complex motivations. That's the point - this is a very complex issue which the government has been awesomely, patronisingly, dangerous reductive on. Looking past your kneejerk revulsion is generally a good idea when you're making laws that could affect people's lives.

If anyone's got any cheap shots they think would be funny, well, don't, it's boring.

*Ahem.

Windows 7 public beta end date named

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Moderatrix!

Nah. It's funny and strangely zen. Sorry.

OK, no more after this point, this time.

14-year-old charged with impersonating Chicago PD

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Eric Cartman

>a mp3 of that catchphrase for a text-message alert.

That won't make you staggeringly unpopular.

Linux to spend eternity in shadow of 'little blue E'

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

re: Re: Users aren't stupid?

I was just pointing out that it was, I felt, disproportionate to suggest that people who don't know about computers should go the way of Mickey Eyes and that in GoodFellas.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Users aren't stupid?

What an enlightened view.

You lot have such elaborately violent fantasies on the finest of hair triggers. I'm starting to think today's nasty new law might actually be a good thing.

Absolutely Fabulous ups sticks to LA

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Ahh but Sarah

To the... what now?

My American family and chums all have a perfectly sound grasp of irony and understanding of sarcasm. Could you all stop spunking all over yourselves in superiority and consider stepping the xenophobia down a notch?

It's not this thread so much as almost everywhere on the Reg whenever Americans are mentioned. You could at least come up with a more creative off-colour slang term for that nation of slack-jawed gun-totin' morons.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: So let's take a guess...

You think?

Really?

A lot of American comedy is absolutely vicious. There's no reason to assume it'll all be wheatgrass and perfect teeth.

Anyway, remakes are popular because if a show's been successful then it's a proven quantity and it's more likely you can squeeze more out of it. This is not necessarily the root of all evil. (For other 'root of all evil' suggestions, see every other thread on the Reg since the dawn of time till Doomsday.)

Most Americans without broadband don't want it

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Neither ignorant nor apathetic

>ignorant and apathetic. Well, I don't know about that and I don't really care.

Tee hee!

Judges grant McKinnon extradition review

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: The time is now

FYI all - this comment and the previous one entitled 'He did the crime' were by the same AC. He evidently got a little more hardline in the five hours between postings.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Stop the ignorance

Oh, and this one's by the same AC too. He has been busy.

Just so you know, Same AC, I'm nixing anything else you think you have to say on this subject, because I am weary of your trollish dribblings. Did someone with Asperger's steal your chocolate milk, or what?

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Justice delayed is justice denied !

What an original and thoughtful comment.

BOFH: A safe bet

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Just got the time to write a comment today

Bien sur. We don't do anything without the say-so of our readers.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Nice...

Oh yes.

US couple leg it with 'gift from God' bank error

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: okay for her

IT'S THE FEMINIST RULE OF LAW! BURN HER!

Hastings junkie hotspots pop up on Google Maps

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @Vincent Rice

Hang on, Stokey as roughly as posh as fuck for the most part. Three-wheeled buggies as far as the eye can see.

Loads of places in London are no worse than anywhere else overall - most places have their rough patches, but they're just patches.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

RE: The use of Sharp as a noun

Now, I'm a pedant, but by Christ and all his little helpers don't you have any more pressing concerns?

Supremes defend American net smut (yet again)

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @ Sarah B

It amazes me how many keyboards seem to get covered in various beverages to the point of ruination around here. Don't you people have any control over your facial muscles? You must learn to turn your head and splutter over the floor instead. There's a recession on, you know, your company is not made of keyboards.

But hey, always glad to spread a little happiness.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Reg headline gets it wrong again.

>Please define "smut" ... G'wan, I dare you.

That video I saw of your mother?

Goat hangs self in Canadian zoo

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Stingray Deaths

You can fondle stingrays to your heart's content at the London Aquarium too, I think it's fairly common practice because they're quite friendly curious animals. So if that's the issue in Calgary then there must be some Calgary-specific contaminant, I'd say.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Sounds plausible

That's fucking horrible.

Infant calls cops to dad's dope plantation

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Warrant? What warrant?

Heh, yes, I was going to say there's been a fair bit of jerking of the knee here with regards the FASCIST PIGS. They really were just doing their job this time.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: No brainer...

Smell? Depends where it is, though. I would have thought he'd have them up in the attic/down in basement with all the necessary hydroponic wotnots. The panic in his eyes would probably be more of a signal, and anyway as many have pointed out the cops would do a search as a matter of routine in the circs.

Lots of people making same points here by the way so I'm nixing a few just so it's only slightly repetitive and not endlessly so.

Rapists should be raped, declares Jordan

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: and???

It's not the angle, it's the width.

What?

McKinnon wins extradition delay

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: mental illness

>no other avenues to try, why not try and have a mental illness, dont worry its not your fault :)

Yes. I'm sure that's precisely what didn't happen.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Relief

Don't you mean 'string him up and let his slowly twisting corpse serve as a warning to all hackers'?

Conficker seizes city's hospital network

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @Sarah Bee

Why don't you try it and see?

(No.)

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @ Sarah Bee

Seriously?

This is a, how you say, lively site, and I am a fickle moderator. I try to keep peace and civility and all up to a point, and then after that point I tend to let everyone fight it out amongst themselves. And then after another point, I join in.

The Queen is not necessarily safe here.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Please enforce moderation

I considered it, UBfusion (if that *is* your real name). And then I moderated it accordingly. Which is why it's now available for your viewing pleasure, discussion and rebuttal.

Also, I can't see where you yourself are directly addressed in Mungo's comment. If you can point out to me what exactly caused you such offence I'll be glad to take appropriate action.

Prison warders told to can 'hurtful' language

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: ..."For Punishment and Rehabilitation"...

Wow, it's just like V from V for Vendetta suddenly showed up in comments or something.

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Prison is a hotel

I'll ignore that cheesy last line there and point you to this interestingness of a few years ago

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2004/dec/06/prisons.crime

Shows how bad it is for everyone involved - prisoners, officers, society, the lot.

Belkin boss 'extremely sorry' for cash-for-good-reviews plan

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Oh Dear!

See, that's what you get here for being too subtle. As far as I can tell it's now a fact that Gordon Brown avidly reads the Reg after I said he did in an attempt to be caustic. Shrug. I think more swearing is the key.

Fake plane death businessman left SOS bullet-point list

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: darwin awards

No no no. Darwin Awards go to people who die through not trying hard enough to stay alive. This guy stayed alive through not trying hard enough to kill himself.

To those commenters, I say this: You have failed, sirs.

IBM faces EU monopoly probe

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: @What was the complaint?

Amusingly enough that's where I worked before I came here. But yes, that's T3, not T3 Technologies.

Govt uses Obscenity Law to stuff up cartoon sex loophole

Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

Re: Oi! Government! NOOOOOO!!!11

I know for a fact that Gordon Brown subscribes to our RSS feed. Apparently he's obsessed with the comments, and we believe he even posts under a variety of psuedonyms.

Straight up.