* Posts by Mycho

2515 posts • joined 28 Mar 2007

Revenge pornography ban tramples free speech, law tossed out – where else but Texas!

Mycho
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There is logic to it.

I get that in the UK the postman who carries the photo of your ex has to be chemically castrated, but Texas has ruled that this is a step too far. Intent matters and if you didn't know that a photo was taken without someone's consent then now you do and you need to get rid of it.

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UK's Department of Fun seeks data strategy head – experience not needed

Mycho
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Re: Not the first time

I was going to ask if that was london pay.

It's not much when you look at the cost of a room big enough to lie down in and the ability to get to work while still breathing.

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Tech bribes: What's the WORST one you've ever been offered?

Mycho
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Re: First of all, I don't accept bribes. Ever. Personal policy.

Or maybe raping someone doesn't appeal regardless of what she looks like?

That would have been my second thought, once the sense of imminent personal danger had passed. So probably on the plane home.

Seriously, to me this sounds like a prime example of how evolution favours people who aren't completely shit. If you accept the offer then you're opening yourself to blackmail by someone who doesn't consider this kind of behaviour extreme. Fuck knows what he'll force you into six months down the line.

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Mycho
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A colleague simply smashed the box to pieces

Doesn't say good things about their security credentials then.

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Mycho
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Re: First of all, I don't accept bribes. Ever. Personal policy.

I would expect the daughter to be a blackmail hook, never mind any moral issues.

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Mycho
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If universities count then the laptop bag which I still use is the best, if not then the thorlabs t-shirt just for work-relevant attire with that mascot on it.

Worst is another one of those usb sticks that die the first time they get a quarter full. I think it was rigged to report a higher capacity than it really had.

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BOFH: We know where the bodies are buried

Mycho
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There were no executions in this episode though.

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BBC extends Capita Audience Services contract to 25 years

Mycho
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Never mind

The way things are going they'll be bankrupt in three.

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Cutting custody snaps too costly for cash-strapped cops – UK.gov

Mycho
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Reads like a classic example of strategic incompetence.

It works for them and they can use their own incompetence as an excuse to keep it.

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France building encrypted messaging app for politicians

Mycho
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I meant what all of you said.

Seriously, you're all perfect. Though dealing with these snoopers does make me pray for the end of time.

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Mycho
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Meat Loaf approves of their efforts.

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Scotland: Get tae f**k on 10Mbps Broadband USO

Mycho
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Re: 10Mbps?

My previous house managed 3Mbps on a good day. Based on the campaign for upgrades, several people were getting much worse.

200 meters from a major north-south route...

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Mycho
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Congressional group asks FBI boss Wray to explain Apple lawsuit

Mycho
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Re: Likely answers

Will the phone still contain data after they pull it out?

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Mycho
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Re: Can't unlock 7800 devices

Are they even worth unlocking? At 1500 a pop to investigate the crime of being some annoying scrote who antagonised the wrong suit, it'd be preferable just to keep hold of it out of spite.

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Mark Duckerberg: Second Congressional grilling sees boss dodge questions like a pro

Mycho
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That was before.

In front of senators Zuck said they belonged on Facebook.

Not that I'm convinced belonging on Facebook is a complement, but from him I am confident it's an endorsement.

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Mycho
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Re: Personal information is the Internet Dollar

it should be a crime to allow the smart to trick the stupid into throwing elections.

It's been standard practice for thousands of years, how do you expect to stop it now?

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Mycho
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I'm just waiting until people realise he also endorsed Diamond and Silk.

Don't get me wrong, lovely ladies. Not so keen on their politics, but man they are divisive.

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Nervous Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg passes Turing Test in Congress

Mycho
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ANTIFA

The important thing to remember is having something in the name of your political movement or party doesn't turn you into the concept.

The DUP are not very democratic, the lib dems are not very liberal and antifa's actions are not opposing fascism.

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Mycho
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Re: Bags under your eyes when...

Nobody has ever bet enough on a winning horse.

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Mind the gap: Men paid 18.6% more than women in Blighty tech sector

Mycho
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you might need £35,000

... and to pass, of course.

This is the real reason so few people opt to become commercial pilots, You pay a phenomenal amount (35 grand is low) to train, and you have to support yourself in the meantime, and if you don't pass you lose it all.

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Birds can feel Earth's magnetic fields? Yeah, that might fly. Bioboffins find vital sense proteins

Mycho
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Re: Mythbusters

My understanding is that there is a massive difference between individuals, probably too much to assess trends between genders without a huge study.

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Mycho
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Re: Mythbusters

One theory is it has to do with polarised light. A small part of your eye can identify how light is polarised and polarisation is a good indicator of direction.

Obviously that would go away if you cover the eyes.

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Mycho
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Re: How would it feel?

It would probably feel like when you're walking down a corridor and you know all the heat is coming from the left. There's no drag, just the thermoreceptors in your skin let you know it's that side.

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Facebook back in court fighting claims it nicked British data centre IP

Mycho
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Re: Reputation

They could just rebrand as 11th Commandment Inc.

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Don't want to alarm you, but defence bods think North Korea could nuke UK 'within a few years'

Mycho
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How machine-learning code turns a mirror on its sexist, racist masters

Mycho
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Re: RE Be interesting to run this on the Register.

Actually, do run it on the Daily Mail, and its sister publication the Metro. Let's find out what similarities there are between the two.

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Mycho
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Be interesting to run this on the Register.

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Furious gunwoman opens fire at YouTube HQ, three people shot

Mycho
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Re: "odd how you didn't mention female wearing headscarf"

It's reassuring to learn that these days people are surprised by violent animal rights activism.

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Mycho
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Re: "odd how you didn't mention female wearing headscarf"

Animal rights activist too.

The labels keep on coming.

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Amazon warns you have 30 days before Music Storage files bloodbath

Mycho
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Interesting

I bought an album on the service in 2013 and have no recollection of it, or of who the band are.

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The Register Opera Company presents: The Pirates of Penzance, Sysadmin edition

Mycho
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So let's just test whether this works...

Disclaimer: This filk may take severe liberties with the cyber conversion process, or may actually be more realistic than the one portrayed in Dr Who. Tradmarks included should be considered to be abused wantonly, I am not Adele and nor am I a Dell.

  • I let it fall, the dark
  • as evening came my senses sharpened.
  • Heard your heart, and you were breathing,
  • Then you passed by me, and I saw you.
  • Your arms were strong, but your skin was far too weak
  • It broke down in my grasp as I pulled you from your feet.
  • Cause there's a side to me that you never knew, never knew,
  • All the things you thought they were never true, never true.
  • It's a game to me and I'll always win, always win!
  • So I stuck wires in your brain
  • nanites crawling up through your veins
  • Well it hurt and you tried
  • but they stopped you screaming out in pain, such pain.
  • When I work on you, place electrodes
  • on your eyes. Blurring thoughts together,
  • Changing you forever everything's better.
  • 'cause there's a side to me that you never knew, never knew,
  • These new thoughts of yours they were never true, never true,
  • I'll rewrite your brain and I'll always win, always win!
  • 'cause I stuck wires in your brain,
  • watched you writhe as they pierced your face,
  • well it burned in your mind,
  • but I stopped you screaming out in pain, such pain.
  • I stuck wires into you brain
  • and pumped sugru into your veins
  • You weren't well, would have died,
  • but it worked out better than last time, than last time.
  • Some days there's something in your face,
  • The mind you had must be somewhere inside you.
  • Even now you've left the human race,
  • Somehow your still searching to find "you".
  • 'cause I stuck wires in your brain,
  • watched you writhe as they pierced your face,
  • well it burned in your mind,
  • but I stopped you screaming out in pain, such pain.
  • I stuck wires into you brain
  • Dr Pepper coating your veins
  • You weren't well, would have died,
  • but it worked out better than last time, than last time.
  • Oh, no,
  • Cyberman, oh
  • Cyberman,
  • Cyberman...

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Mycho
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Anyone know how to do single line breaks in these comments?

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Mycho
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Re: That was good

He's making a list,

checking it's right,

scoping out future

accident sites...

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Mycho
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Re: Ooh, tempting

Happy tree friends style? I'll have to see.

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Mycho
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Ooh, tempting

I've done a lot of filks in my time. Currently the only thing I have in my head is Adele threatening to stick wires in your brain, but I'll use the long weekend productively, then try to come up with a song at work next week.

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BT to slash landline rentals by 37%... for the broadbandless

Mycho
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Remind me,

Can you still get £5 off your TV Licence if you're blind?

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Cambridge Analytica's daddy biz had 'routine access' to UK secrets

Mycho
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If you're already dead you have nothing to fear.

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What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs

Mycho
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Re: Fuck translates to Fick, Bolle, and what more

It will do what always happens in these cases. Clean language will become offensive, again.

You know 'special needs' is used abusively by school children these days?

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Mycho
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Feature request

Can we remind them that Ruddy is an expletive in some parts of the world?

Then convince them that Amber Rudd is an even more offensive form of the term referencing discoloration due to being pissed on by everybody for years?

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Mycho
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Re: WTF!

I hope they do ban WTF, I never liked that game.

WTA FTW!

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Facebook supremo Mark Zuckerberg has flunky tell UK MPs: Nope, he's sending someone else

Mycho
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Re: @csecguy44

Videoconferencing is not an issue. We all know Zucky keeps his webcams covered at all times.

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Bitcoin's blockchain: Potentially a hazardous waste dump of child abuse, malware, etc

Mycho
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At times, currencies were backed by tangible resources such as gold or silver

Then the notes were stand-ins for the shiny metals that made up the real currency.

Do you need gold? It's not really that important for most people's lives compared to the importance of money. The only thing that gives money value is taxation, because everybody pays taxes and so everybody needs at least a little bit of money.

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Mycho
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a Ponzi scheme dreamt up by tulip sellers to relieve the gullible of their cash which also happens to be a nice medium of exchange for crims

Which is essentially all a currency is.

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Slap visibility beacons on bikes so they can chat to auto autos, says trade body

Mycho
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Given that Blighty doesn't even seem to have adopted things like internal gears and chains to avoid ruining your suit, I don't see this taking off there any time soon.

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BOOM! Cambridge Analytica explodes following extraordinary TV expose

Mycho
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Re: FB vs CA

The circle is known in politcal science as the horseshoe theory.

There's also the fishhook theory that argues everybody not on your side is the same kind of dick.

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Mycho
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Now you mention it, Scott Adams kept insisting Hillary must have a mole in her campaign because of some of the basic mistakes she was making.

I'd assumed he was being facetious, but it fits what we now know about CA's modus operandi...

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Mycho
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Re: FB vs CA

They could be said to be those people, but it would be inaccurate.

All I would say for sure is that the left doesn't trust corporations and the right doesn't trust government bureaucrats. Which leads to the bizarre situation in America where left wing Americans are demanding Trump control their free speech.

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Mycho
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Re: FB vs CA

Left vs Right was created to arrange seating in 18th century France. It was never intended to be a decent representation of an individual's political views.

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US cops go all Minority Report: Google told to cough up info on anyone near a crime scene

Mycho
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Safety from giving up liberty is not safety. The difference between a violation of safety and a violation of liberty is whether the perpetrator works for the government.

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