* Posts by Herby

2931 posts • joined 14 Dec 2007

Spammers ordered to pay tiny ISP whopping $2.6m

Herby Silver badge

The big question is:

Will they collect?

Rarely with nice large judgements does the plaintiff actually collect any money. When the spammer is sucked dry and is lifeless having paid the aforementioned amount will it be time to celebrate. Until then, it is just a number written on a piece of paper, which isn't worth much (unfortunately!).

Missing Soviet nuclear electrocar FOUND ON MOON

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One (maybe two) owner(s), low miles!

Yours for the taking. One problem, you need to get there. Oh well!

Microsoft: 'Prepare for 15 billion more clients'

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Windows embedded in a hospital?

I don't think so! Now lets see how to bypass the blue screen of death. Oh, sorry, the patient died.

Now lets go to the automobile brake control system. Would any car maker trust anything that was "mission critical" to another vendor? Flying lawsuits, and lawyer full employment assured.

If I were an OEM that was considering an embedded operating system, anything with the name "Windows" (or Microsoft) would be on the DON'T buy list for the simple reason that I would have NO CONTROL over it. Microsoft changes something and my product doesn't work any more: really bad karma!

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15 billion??

Just a thought, but that would be at least TWO items for every man, woman, and child on the planet. I doubt that!

California's 'Zero Energy House' is actually massive fossil hog

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Yes, three bedroom, three bath

If you don't understand this then it is obvious that you live in a household with parity in X and Y chromosomes. With a household with a surplus of X chromosomes it is VERY necessary to have a bathroom for each bedroom. Sharing a bathroom with someone else (unless you are intimate with them) is a real bummer!

I know this from experience, many years of experience!

On the other hand if you want a "green" house, look to AlGore for a nicely wild consumption. His electricity meter spins like a top!!

Microsoft wants pacemaker password tattoos

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Tatoos I've thought of

I have been saying to friends of mine that the tattoo I'd probably get is one on the bottom of my (nondescript) foot that says:

FOR PROPER OPERATION THIS SIDE SHOULD FACE DOWN.

As for "Leftmost", yes, there are people without a left foot (my father is one). He lost it in a trolley accident many moons ago. Any more details would be leaking information. Thankfully he doesn't have a pacemaker (even at his advanced age).

Microsoft slams coffin lid on Vista

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Windows Vista was SUPPORTED?

Boy, you could have fooled me. Microsoft supports its users, why you could have blown me over with a feather.

Of course, my wife's computer is running W98 just fine, but all she does is browsing.

Oh, well.

Pitchman fights to avoid jail for egging on supporters to spam judge

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30 days?

A nice start, but not enough. Better luck next time...

Google tweaks search results with mystery site speedometer

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They need to compare loads for browsers too!

Many sites have different pages for IE and FF. If they were REALLY smart those with loads for IE (which are longer) would show up as well.

Maybe a comment on the results page that says "This page loads longer in IE". It might help show that IE really isn't that good of a browser.

Of course the flash garbage (and time wasting Javascript) being excised would help everyone. It might even lead to better designs! We can only hope!

Frisco fanboi frenzy on 'iPad Day'

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That part of Texas (Frisco)

I stand corrected. Were there any long lines there on Saturday?

But Frisco is STILL in Texas!

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Frisco in in TEXAS

If you are a proper person, the location in question is SAN FRANCISCO, or as us northern Californians simply say "The City".

I have strong doubts that there is an Apple store in that part of Texas.

Skewing statistics: Booze, money and sex

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Then there is the sign...

"The productive drunk is the bane of all moralists"

Over the mantle in a wonderful location that I can't tell you about. It should be over those who want to legislate such things as:

Absolute speed limits (as safe as conditions permit sounds good to me).

Absolute DUI limits (I suspect that over 0.1% is a pretty good limit, but this 0.5% or less is a bit much for me).

Absolute wealth limits (Giving ALL of Bill Gates $$$ to every American wouldn't help much, and it wouldn't make ANY dent in how much our nation borrows).

Don't get me started (*SIGH*)

Opera alerts EU to hidden Windows browser-ballot

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What is REALLY needed

Is a "I want a refund please UNinstall Windows (XP/Vista/7)".

If Microsoft offered a refund of REAL money, not some funny stuff, on store built PC's that would be a real boon. Then I wouldn't need to waste the $$$/time on the whole problem. Yes, I'd need to install Linux, but that is a bit easier than clicking on all that junk that appears when you first buy a PC.

Greenpeace fears clouds will turn earth brown

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Stop breathing and passing gas

You know, humans DIRECTLY contribute to "greenhouse" gases. If the greenpeace people would stop living it might reduce LOTS of greenhouse gases. And if that stops the hot air they ALSO produce it would be even better.

A modest proposal.

Novell (not SCO) owns UNIX, says jury

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When will they die?

Soon, I hope!

It seems like this is a game of "Whack an SCO". It keeps popping back up after being throughly whacked. Is the game rigged?

Radio lobby 'hides' 2m analogue receiver sales

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If it ain't broke...

...don't fix it!

That applies to this silly reduced quality DAB trash. We here in the USA are just waiting for them to turn it off. Hopefully they will soon. It just causes a bunch of buzz and rarely works. In our local area we have LOTS of FM stations (over 40 I believe). We have lots of hills in the SF Bay area which make nice transmitter locations. One can drive around and get soooooo many stations as very nice FM quality. Most in stereo.

Oh, some of those stereo stations have been going strong for over 50 years!

If it ain't broke, don't fix it!!

Royal Navy starts work on new, pointless frigates

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A better solution might be:

A nice PlayMobil version. They could make lots of them for the multi-millions they now cost. They would then show up in pictures (a bathtub works pretty well for an ocean simulator) and they could get all approved.

Probably be just as useful according to the article.

Good luck.

My choice: A nice Nimitz class aircraft carrier. Sorry that blighty can't afford one (I don't know if Uncle Sam can afford them now that we'll be paying for the drug addicts and fatties clogging the system).

US couple jailed for TV shoplifting brag

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Catching crooks (easy, or hard?)

Look, criminals aren't very smart (by definition). Most are caught by being stupid, or by being greedy (many both). In this case, they added the third aspect: need for 'fame'.

When you hit the trifecta, it becomes easy for the police.

Solution: If you ARE a crook:

1) Don't be greedy

2) Don't be stupid.

3) Don't go public about it!

Segway + motorbike = futuristic dorkmobile

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What's wrong with bipedal locomotion?

Nice and clean, no equipment required and everyone can do it.

Why waste the $$$ on something that takes longer to get dressed for than you will use it? Silly to me!

Tories go nuclear, promise to prop up carbon price

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We can all go back to...

...horses. The problem is that we will be up to our eyeballs in S***.

Oh, well.

At least here in the USA we don't do this sort of thing (I hope!). All this carbon credit stuff is a waste of time anyway.

Have a look at: http://www.carbonliberators.com/

Cybercrime's bulletproof hosting exposed

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It is all a game to everyone...

A game of "Whack-a-mole". Hit it on the head, and it pops up somewhere else. Need everyone to get their hammer and strike at once. Maybe some day, we can hope!

Now if someone gets control of the botnet and sends out a self destruct code, that would be really nice. Given the allowable methods of fighting botnets, this might not be to ethical (but it needs to be done!).

'Twitter gives voice to the voiceless' - eg the US President

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Twitter motto

I seem to recall one from my earlier days (and the salesman thought is was a good idea as well):

Lose a little bit on each one, make it up in volume.

Eventually we went chapter 7. Oh, well.

Nazi-doodlebug-powered father of all paintball guns patented

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Now for the proper question...

Where can one buy one? How Much??

'Promiscuous slapper fruitfly sluts prevent mass extinctions'

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Fruit Flys ≠ Humans

Unfortunately for the males of the human species. (*SIGH*)

Feds open school spycam probe

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Is there a PFY episode here?

There is something here, I mean why wouldn't the boss have one of these that was accidentally declared "missing" for the purposes of this investigation. The mind boggles!

BOFH: The PFY Chronicles

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Correct implements?

Silver Bullet? No!

Wooden Stake? No!

Atom Bomb? No!

Cross Involved? No!

BOFH is still out there! And Feb 12th ISN'T a full moon!!

Do Google's search warrant police run IE6?

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Why doesn't Google publish a "proof of concept" code...

That just destroys IE6. I mean just wipes as much of it off the face of the earth. Then when people search for a solution, it says "upgrade".

Of course if would be a proof of concept and wouldn't be released to the wild. No, never!! And Google would never do it (they wouldn't need to!).

As for Google being "the anti Microsoft", making Microsoft "the anti Google", what does that make Apple? It is answered in the old phrase:

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend" (historical reference: WW2!).

City supe slaps bank for account compromise

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After it is gone, good luck getting it back!

Here in the USA, the banks "aren't responsible". They are insured by our government (in the form of FDIC) for only $250k (it used to be $100k). If you have a "loss" of more than that amount, so sorry, the bank is not liable AT ALL. Even if you do get FDIC to give you something, since it is related to foreign things, it falls under the department of Homeland Security. Most of the people there are wannabe political hacks, and don't care AT ALL. I've got a friend who has been waiting almost TWO YEARS to get some of the scammed $$$ back into his account. In the meantime he can't even open a bank account in his name since it all was frozen (again by Homeland Security) just to be "safe" (or to have a political hack keep his job).

Maybe the suit by the city against the bank will bring things to light (but don't count on it)!!

Santa Fe man demands half a mill for being near iPhone

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Inverse square: It's the Law!

One of these days the tin-foil-hat people will understand, but probably not in their lifetime. Of course, one must consider ALL sources of EMF, including that great nuclear reactor that is emitting them 93,000,000 miles away. Until THAT gets shut off, I don't think anything will truly be EMF free. Of course there is the big-bang background radiation that persists, and I don't think THAT is going away anytime soon.

Why doesn't he move to Taliban territory. They seem to be in the 13th century when EMF wasn't a problem!

FCC raises eyebrow at Google 'white-space' play

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Joke

Take them from the Government first!

There is a BUNCH of nice white space between 300MHz and 400MHz. Of course it is used by governments (and their army/navies). What do governments need with radios, don't they all use cell phones or some such. All that nice unused spectrum gone to waste, and they can't use it. Let the FCC/OFCOM sell it off and make money. Surely the military can pay for it.

Yes, all this white space junk is terrible. You need to be in control of ALL aspects of the link to really know if it is compatible. Looking at just one side won't cut it, and never will!!

Microsoft tosses Windows, Office discounts at XP holdouts

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When do I get a discount...

For REMOVING Windoze of Office from a new computer?

Shouldn't every computer come with such "rebates". It would be a really nice feature given the market. One of those nice netbooks at a $100 off as I reckon. Should be a requirement of a "pre-installed" operating system provided by a third party.

I am also advising a friend that OpenOffice is an alternative to the later versions of whatever Microsoft uses. He is willing to "try it out" to see if it fits the bill. Pretty simple to test-drive if you ask me. Of course, if it works, he will save a BUNCH on license fees on his XP machines which he has no intention of updating any time soon.

Lithuania hits off switch on nuclear plant

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Maybe just build a containment vessel??

Most of the hardware in a power plant is pretty common even for nuclear and steam power. It may take a bit of time, but a nice new "good" reactor (from France?) might plug like a new CPU on a motherboard.

P.S. Pipe fitting extra. At least they turned off the engine before it seized now they need to do a heart transplant! Hopefullt there is no immune reactions during the transplant!

US feds squeeze bloggers for posting TSA orders

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Security Theatre

That's about all it is. No more, no less. Give everyone a gun before they board, and let it play out as it goes. It ought to take care of itself.

The best (of the worst) patent claims of 2009

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Some of these things exist already...

The conference phone "interjection" idea is already covered. Doesn't anyone know about the "mute" button. On the "other" end it gets pressed and in that room, there is a running commentary of the blowhard's speech on the other end. It is usually more enlightening that the "naked" speech anyway, and much more fun.

As for shoe tactile feedback, they already did that one. Way back when there was a blackjack computer that used a method of shaking the toes to indicate stand/hit and the other toes were used to enter the card count.

As the saying goes: Everything old is new again, and then it is patented just to make sure! (*SIGH*)

Microsoft issues wipe clean Word tool for OEMs

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Open Office?

I have a good friend that is using these "docx" files (I don't know if he uses the infringing things or not), and I have been pointing him to OpenOffice. I understand that Version 3 DOES allow the use of these "docx" files (actually a zip file with lots of stuff added in!). The big question I have is: Does OpenOffice have this "patented" capability? and will i4i sue them as well, getting an injunction to remove it?

Inquiring minds want to know!

p.s. Tomorrow's headline: Microsoft announces the acquisition of a Canadian company based in Toronto called I4I. Details of the agreement were not announced at press time.

Ofcom proposes squeezing £4m out of airlines

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And I thought the FCC (US) was bad!

Gee wiz, charging for mandated frequency use? Nice try.

I like the part about charging for WiFi, force everyone who buys a wireless router to pony up a few Quid/Bucks to get one.

I suppose the next thing would be Microwave Ovens, as they also radiate at 2.4GHz!

Trucks driving by to see if you have the proper license for the Microwave oven, pulling over to stop granny from heating up a scone or some such. What a joke!

Tiny TV could make billions for FCC

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Economics?

Do you REALLY think that the $$$ the government will make selling out the frequencies will go to pay for the TV stations upgrade. I have my EXTREME doubts. Once the government gets its hands on any amount of money (all governments are this way!) it is VERY reluctant to give anything back. More than likely they will stick it to the TV stations and mandate (just like the Digital TV mess we now have) they do the job themselves. And that will go over how well??

The cell phone people should just add digital TV receivers to their cell phones and off load the "Broadcast" traffic from their cell networks. Look why should there be any more than ONE stream of bits for a TV signal to any number of cell phones, not one for each as it is now, chewing up LOADS of bandwidth in the process.

CTIA should pound sand!

Oh, and analog TV worked MUCH better that the junk compressed bad signal stuff we have now. The only "feature" is wide screen and a not bery good one at that!

P.S. Just make it work in the SF bay area (loaded with mountains and LOTS of dead spots!

Software fraudster 'fooled CIA' into terror alert

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And so it goes... Now find the hidden messages in...

The Bible. There has been LOTS of work in thes area, by taking letters and puting them in nice neat rows and reading the columns. All sorts of "messages" were decoded. Of course the Bible mess was made easier by using Hebrew, and the "no vowel" version.

Nothing new. finding something where nothing exists, been done for ages.

Wait I heard a voice that said.........

Publisher asks Google, AT&T to unmask network intruder

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Joke

Pretty simple request if you ask me.

Look the IP address is 192.168.0.1

Go ahead, trace it!

Intel staff 'fired' in ring piece stunt

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Those notes...

Why is it that EVERY time I hear the intel notes (sung, or played on a synth), I want to repeat the phrase:

Bong...A Piece of S***

It just fits (and quite well I might add). Unfortunately, I can't seem to get Microsoft into the notes (Oh, well...)

Honeynet research lifts the lid on spam trends

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Spam persists. Everyone will deal with it.

The only way SPAM will die out is when it proves to be unprofitable. Until then, we will all have to deal with the consequences.

Oh well, live and learn.

Why is USB 3 so slow?

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So slow? Because it isn't Firewire!

Instead of USB-3, Intel should have promoted Firewire as the better alternative. I really don't need a 100Mbit.sec data rate for my keyboard or mouse.

The better alternative was Apple's ADB bus. IT was designed for the small number of input devices (keyboards and mice) that were in use. USB is just another mish-mash that started out reasonable, but got more and more involved. Look, it even gave a blue screen for Bill Gates in a televised demonstration, so it didn't do its job when it was first implemented.

Enough said.

Of course, I could go on about the IDE interface vs. SCSI, but that is another kettle of fish (*SIGH*).

ICANN condemns registry DNS redirection

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Return to sender...

Address unknown. No such number...

Looks like they want all ill formed DNS lookups to go back to Elvis, or something. Need a postage stamp with his picture to do that!

Early adopters bloodied by Ubuntu's Karmic Koala

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What Me Worry?

I'll just wait for Fedora 12 which is due out sometime this month. Typically it will get released, and be followed by a bunch of updates. Then all is right with the world.

Of course I don't update that quickly, as I am currently using a Fedora 8 machine to write this with (it has the 2.6.26 kernel).

US gov warns banks on money mules

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Now if the government would free up funds of the law abiding...

I have a friend that has had is bank account frozen by the government for over TWO years. He was the victim of the identity theft, but that almost pales in comparison the what delays the government has done. He has been mooching off of me to the tune of over $100k and I hope that the government will "let his money out of jail".

Then again, if cashing a LEGITIMATE overseas check wouldn't take THREE weeks, it might restore my faith in the banking system we have here in the USA! (Don't get me started on this!)

Novell aims SCO tussle at the Supremes

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Bankruptcy....

Maybe SCO should file under Chapter 7 (liquidation). Then we can all chip in 2 cents (in total) which ought to cover what SCO is worth and GIVE it to the public.

Until THAT happens SCO is on life support (and brain dead) waiting for the plug to be pulled.

Governator in acrostic 'f**k you' outrage

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Remember that the object of the veto message...

...comes from the same city as the Botox Queen (Nancy Pelosi). Well deserved I might add from a nice distance about 40 miles to the south.

Tesla Roadster travels 313 miles on single charge

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Probably...

...Down hill, with a tail wind. Most likely on cruise control at a walking pace. Wind resistance goes up as the square of the speed.

The other alternative is that they stowed it in a truck (Lorrie) for the trip, and drove it for the last 5 miles.

Me? My nice SUV gets about 350+ miles on a tank of gas going over 70mph down I-5 in the central valley (of California), and it hauls a bunch of stuff while I'm doing it and the air conditioner is just fine thank you.

Greenpeace wags finger at eco-laggards

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And the question all are asking...

What is ElReg's score?

What is a "good" score?

Free download turns BlackBerry into remote bugging device

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Easy to do...

Hey Bob, can I borrow your phone for a bit. My battery is dead and I need to make a call/email.

Simple if you ask me to install on a "victim".

Not that I'd do that mind you.

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